Kurt was sobbing as he picked up the razor. He knew he shouldn't do it. He knew that he shouldn't pick it up. But then again, he didn't really have a choice. He needed to know he was still human.
He had thought that transferring to Dalton for a few months would change things. If anything, it made it worse. Karofsky had started harassing him more often. Instead of a Slushy a day, it was two or three. He was put in the Dumpsters every day. No one spoke to him in the hallways, with the exception of Glee club, but they still thought that he was someone who shouldn't be trusted, a spy. Hellos in Glee were the closest he got to a real acceptance.
Mostly, he did it because he felt human. He was numb most of the time. Kurt needed to make sure he could still feel pain. But as he reopened the scars on his wrists and arms, he knew it wasn't going to be enough this time. So what else was he supposed to do, but open the medicine cabinet and grab the bottle of Burt's heart medicine? He slowly choked back one, two, three, four. He took as many as he could before his vision started to blur. The last thought he could muster up before he dropped onto the floor was, "Maybe they'll care when I'm dead."
Blaine walked into the living room. "How's he doing today?" he asked Burt.
Burt replied, "Same as normal, I think. Walked upstairs without saying anything to me. You might want to check on him, I haven't heard a peep."
"Thanks, I'll go up now." Blaine waved his goodbyes and walked upstairs. He strolled into Kurt's bedroom, where Kurt normally could be found rearranging his closet. Today, though, no one was there.
That's funny, Blaine thought. He knocked on the bathroom door. "Honey, are you there? I found a new song I thought we could rehearse." No one replied. Blaine knocked again, a little more insistent this time. "Kurt?" he asked.
Again, there was no answer. Blaine was worried at this point. Instead of knocking again, he tried to turn the knob. It wasn't locked, so he opened the door all the way.
"Burt, get up here. NOW." Blaine screamed, pulling out his phone to call 911.
"Well, the good news is, he's in stable condition. He should be good to go home in about 3 days. But before you do that, you need to seriously consider getting him some help. I'm saying this in a purely professional way, you realize. We have wonderful councilors working with the hospital. I think Mr. Hummel could really benefit from some professional help," the doctor told Burt. Blaine, who was sitting by his side, started crying into his hands. Burt patted him on the back, his own tears spilling out. His baby boy was going to be all right.
"When can we see him?" Blaine gasped.
The doctor said, "You can go in now. But please, only one at a time."
Blaine looked at Burt. Burt shook his head, and said, "No. He needs you more than he needs me right now. I'll stay here and talk to the doctor about those councilors." Blaine hugged Burt tightly, and ran into the room.
As soon as Blaine entered the room, he wanted to leave it. To see Kurt hooked up to all the machines and needles… Well, it wasn't a sight he had wanted to see any time soon. Kurt slightly grinned, seeing his boyfriend there next to him. "Hey honey," he said.
Blaine sat down on the hospital bed, and grabbed onto Kurt's hand. "Why the hell?"
Kurt sighed, and said, "I did it because I'm worthless. I did it because honestly, no one here really needs me. I don't do anything but give bullies something fun to do. I'm nothing but a target. And to be honest, I'd rather be dead than a target."
Blaine's eyes started watering. "Kurt Elizabeth Hummel. You mean so much to me, and to your father. Isn't that enough? There are two people in the world who love you more than anything else in this world. I need you. You are anything but worthless to me. When I found you there, it almost killed me inside. I can't live without you, Kurt." He stopped to wipe his eyes. "I love you. Don't do this to me."
Kurt was openly sobbing by this point. "I love you too, baby."
"Promise me. Promise me that if anything like this ever happens again, before you take the pills and before you grab the razor, you will call me. Please." Blaine whispered.
Kurt nodded. Both the boys fell bawling into each others arms, not planning on ever letting go.