Cantante Domino
Chapter 1:
Located on the sleazier end of town, rooms were rented by the day mostly, although hourly and weekly rates were also available. It was a perfect place to get lost among the faceless masses, for whom the recent worldwide war for peace seemed to touch but lightly.
The war touched him too deeply. He had been created for it, and in turn the war had burned its outlines in his soul. But in places like this, scarred souls were common. People came and went, like the tides, and provided they paid up front and were not overly violent, they got about as much attention.
The room was all that the motel's reputation had promised it would be. It was dirty, the heating intermittent. Harsh neon lights reflected through a single murky window, casting eerie shadows against the peeling paint on the walls. He didn't mind though, he'd stayed in worse places, under worse conditions. What he valued most was the anonymity. He could move through this world without leaving so much as a ripple in his wake. They wouldn't mind screaming, though he never screamed, and they would ignore the silence. Tactically speaking, such places were ideal.
For a second, his entire body tensed.
'No', he berated himself, 'I have to stop thinking in these terms. The world is at peace.'
Without stopping to turn on a light, he dropped his jacket onto the bed. Still holding a small case, he walked over to the edge of the room facing the door and sat down on the dusty windowsill. He removed the straps on the bag with the confidence of long experience, opening the combination lock by touch. Out of the case he took a laptop computer. Bringing his knees up he rested the computer on his legs. He seemed to stare through the screen, waiting for the computer to boot up, as though there was something in the startup code which only had meaning to him.
In spite of the constant traffic noise, the dull thuds and shouts of his neighbors, he was still unable to block the memories. Unlike them, he had no one. He had no future. The scrolling computer screen faded into the past.
He could still hear her voice. He could still hear the faint mournful sound of a violin playing through yet another of an endless stream of diplomatic affairs. He could still feel the pang of fear when she seemingly vanished into thin air. He'd put security on silent alert, as he searched the premises to find her.
He had found her nearby, in an adjoining room. She stood, her back facing the door, watching the snow fall. At first he was angry. She should have given a signal to one of her many bodyguards instead of just sneaking away, scaring security to death. 'Scaring him'. He dismissed the thought as quickly as he'd had it. Didn't she realize there were so many people who would love the opportunity to find and do away with the former Queen of the World?
But the expression on her face swept away what anger he might have felt. She stood, hand extended, touching the glass as if it was a wall, trapping her inside, as opposed to keeping the elements out. He could almost feel her desire to romp through the snow, to roll in it, to make snow angels, her desire to forget for a moment her responsibilities. He smiled, one half of his mouth turning upward. His responsibilities defined him, but for a wistful moment, he wondered if he could share her dream.
Without warning she turned, amber hair flowing with the movement like water across her back. He tried too late to fade back into the shadows. She deserved her moment of privacy. Her warm blue eyes met his, and there was a brief spark of understanding between them before he returned his features to neutrality.
"Heero!" She smiled, taking a step closer to him.
"Relena." He responded his usual monotone. "Security was worried about your disappearance. You should signal your bodyguards when you are going into an unsecured area. It's not safe to wander around outside your estates." He wished he could step closer, meet her with a similar smile, touch her hair, but her safety was more important.
"I see." She responded, the smile fading from her face.
"Are you ready rejoin the party?" He asked, his tone softening slightly.
Relena took a step towards the door, then stopped, looking back at him. "Heero?"
He inclined his head slightly in acknowledgement.
She paused, taking a breath, "Why do you stay?" Words began to tumble out of her mouth in an uncontrollable rush. "I mean, you can have any job. Or go to school. Or anything. You saved the world. But instead you stand in my shadow. There hasn't even been an attempt on my life for over a year. And the current security force is quite competent. You did help train them." Her voice trailed off, waiting, her blue eyes a mix of questions and barely concealed hope.
Emotions coursed through him, an acid wave burning just beneath his skin. Only his training allowed him to maintain eye contact without stepping forward, grabbing her, saying something. Her eyes glowed. Relena was the most important person in his life. The moment he awoke on the beach, before he realized to his dismay he was still alive, he'd thought she was an angel. In the face of his unremitting contempt and hostility, her unconditional kindness had been the act of one.
He knew their futures were intertwined. After over a year of silence, Relena was the last thing Zero had shown him. He knew then, as he'd felt before, that he was ultimately responsible for her safety. Already his feelings distracted him. He would get lost in her movements, her voice, the passion she went about her work in spite of almost constant exhaustion. To maintain the vigilance necessary to keep her alive, he also had to maintain his distance.. He had already betrayed this trust once by allowing her to be kidnapped in Mariemeia's coup. He vowed he never would do so again. Without her, he would have been as lost as Wu-Fei, fighting for any cause, unable to live outside the context of battle. He had been made for war. Protecting Relena was what gave him the strength to live in peace.
So he told her a piece of the truth, hoping against a deeper hope that she'd accept it. "Zero showed me the future peace rested on your shoulders. It is my final mission."
Something behind her eyes shattered.
'She believes me.' He felt his stomach sink to his feet. It was what he wanted. He should have been relieved. But instead, he felt something break within him as well.
Relena swallowed, holding back tears. "I'd thought it might be something like that." Her voice cracked, but she continued, "Don't you understand?" she asked, "You can't just give up your life to be my protector, chained to me through some obscure feeling of duty." Her eyes shone now with unshed tears. "We have all struggled so hard for peace. As fragile as this peace might be, we can't keep acting out the roles of our past."
She turned away from him, again facing the window.
"I am resigning my diplomatic position." Relena spoke calmly, with no inflection. "So you see, I no longer require a keeper."
Her words were bitter, final. They met silence. Shock. For a moment, his mask slipped. Naked longing and sorrow flashed across his features, but her back was turned. She didn't see.
"In fact," she continued, "I will be announcing my resignation tonight."
Without another word or glance in his direction, she turned, and walking past him, stepped through the door.
Chapter 1:
Located on the sleazier end of town, rooms were rented by the day mostly, although hourly and weekly rates were also available. It was a perfect place to get lost among the faceless masses, for whom the recent worldwide war for peace seemed to touch but lightly.
The war touched him too deeply. He had been created for it, and in turn the war had burned its outlines in his soul. But in places like this, scarred souls were common. People came and went, like the tides, and provided they paid up front and were not overly violent, they got about as much attention.
The room was all that the motel's reputation had promised it would be. It was dirty, the heating intermittent. Harsh neon lights reflected through a single murky window, casting eerie shadows against the peeling paint on the walls. He didn't mind though, he'd stayed in worse places, under worse conditions. What he valued most was the anonymity. He could move through this world without leaving so much as a ripple in his wake. They wouldn't mind screaming, though he never screamed, and they would ignore the silence. Tactically speaking, such places were ideal.
For a second, his entire body tensed.
'No', he berated himself, 'I have to stop thinking in these terms. The world is at peace.'
Without stopping to turn on a light, he dropped his jacket onto the bed. Still holding a small case, he walked over to the edge of the room facing the door and sat down on the dusty windowsill. He removed the straps on the bag with the confidence of long experience, opening the combination lock by touch. Out of the case he took a laptop computer. Bringing his knees up he rested the computer on his legs. He seemed to stare through the screen, waiting for the computer to boot up, as though there was something in the startup code which only had meaning to him.
In spite of the constant traffic noise, the dull thuds and shouts of his neighbors, he was still unable to block the memories. Unlike them, he had no one. He had no future. The scrolling computer screen faded into the past.
He could still hear her voice. He could still hear the faint mournful sound of a violin playing through yet another of an endless stream of diplomatic affairs. He could still feel the pang of fear when she seemingly vanished into thin air. He'd put security on silent alert, as he searched the premises to find her.
He had found her nearby, in an adjoining room. She stood, her back facing the door, watching the snow fall. At first he was angry. She should have given a signal to one of her many bodyguards instead of just sneaking away, scaring security to death. 'Scaring him'. He dismissed the thought as quickly as he'd had it. Didn't she realize there were so many people who would love the opportunity to find and do away with the former Queen of the World?
But the expression on her face swept away what anger he might have felt. She stood, hand extended, touching the glass as if it was a wall, trapping her inside, as opposed to keeping the elements out. He could almost feel her desire to romp through the snow, to roll in it, to make snow angels, her desire to forget for a moment her responsibilities. He smiled, one half of his mouth turning upward. His responsibilities defined him, but for a wistful moment, he wondered if he could share her dream.
Without warning she turned, amber hair flowing with the movement like water across her back. He tried too late to fade back into the shadows. She deserved her moment of privacy. Her warm blue eyes met his, and there was a brief spark of understanding between them before he returned his features to neutrality.
"Heero!" She smiled, taking a step closer to him.
"Relena." He responded his usual monotone. "Security was worried about your disappearance. You should signal your bodyguards when you are going into an unsecured area. It's not safe to wander around outside your estates." He wished he could step closer, meet her with a similar smile, touch her hair, but her safety was more important.
"I see." She responded, the smile fading from her face.
"Are you ready rejoin the party?" He asked, his tone softening slightly.
Relena took a step towards the door, then stopped, looking back at him. "Heero?"
He inclined his head slightly in acknowledgement.
She paused, taking a breath, "Why do you stay?" Words began to tumble out of her mouth in an uncontrollable rush. "I mean, you can have any job. Or go to school. Or anything. You saved the world. But instead you stand in my shadow. There hasn't even been an attempt on my life for over a year. And the current security force is quite competent. You did help train them." Her voice trailed off, waiting, her blue eyes a mix of questions and barely concealed hope.
Emotions coursed through him, an acid wave burning just beneath his skin. Only his training allowed him to maintain eye contact without stepping forward, grabbing her, saying something. Her eyes glowed. Relena was the most important person in his life. The moment he awoke on the beach, before he realized to his dismay he was still alive, he'd thought she was an angel. In the face of his unremitting contempt and hostility, her unconditional kindness had been the act of one.
He knew their futures were intertwined. After over a year of silence, Relena was the last thing Zero had shown him. He knew then, as he'd felt before, that he was ultimately responsible for her safety. Already his feelings distracted him. He would get lost in her movements, her voice, the passion she went about her work in spite of almost constant exhaustion. To maintain the vigilance necessary to keep her alive, he also had to maintain his distance.. He had already betrayed this trust once by allowing her to be kidnapped in Mariemeia's coup. He vowed he never would do so again. Without her, he would have been as lost as Wu-Fei, fighting for any cause, unable to live outside the context of battle. He had been made for war. Protecting Relena was what gave him the strength to live in peace.
So he told her a piece of the truth, hoping against a deeper hope that she'd accept it. "Zero showed me the future peace rested on your shoulders. It is my final mission."
Something behind her eyes shattered.
'She believes me.' He felt his stomach sink to his feet. It was what he wanted. He should have been relieved. But instead, he felt something break within him as well.
Relena swallowed, holding back tears. "I'd thought it might be something like that." Her voice cracked, but she continued, "Don't you understand?" she asked, "You can't just give up your life to be my protector, chained to me through some obscure feeling of duty." Her eyes shone now with unshed tears. "We have all struggled so hard for peace. As fragile as this peace might be, we can't keep acting out the roles of our past."
She turned away from him, again facing the window.
"I am resigning my diplomatic position." Relena spoke calmly, with no inflection. "So you see, I no longer require a keeper."
Her words were bitter, final. They met silence. Shock. For a moment, his mask slipped. Naked longing and sorrow flashed across his features, but her back was turned. She didn't see.
"In fact," she continued, "I will be announcing my resignation tonight."
Without another word or glance in his direction, she turned, and walking past him, stepped through the door.