I'm Sorry

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry to leave.

But it doesn't matter, does it?

I'm nothing. Especially compared to Feliciano. Ever since we were little. Grandpa Rome never gave me praise, he separated us even, simply because Feli had—has—talent. I heard Spain begging Austria to switch Italies. And so much after that. I won't even bother to make you read every detail of my stupid life.

-Lovino

The Italian took a deep breath, holding the knife, tears of blood streaming down his arm. Shakily, he set it down, taking a final look around the room, and picked up the gun.

Julchen's breath caught in her throat as she read over the note. No, Lovino!

"West, I'm going out!" She called down the hallway, already out the door by the time she received a response.

He pressed the gun to his head, closing his eyes, finger slowly moving the trigger.

"LOVINO VARGAS I SWEAR TO GOTT IF YOU PULL THAT TRIGGER I WILL—!"

He jumped, losing his grip on the gun and it fell to the floor. Julchen's arms were wrapped around his waist. "Why on earth would you ever do that? I mean, what would Feli do? And Spain does too love you! And, and what about me? Are you an idiot, why would you—?"

She stopped and grabbed his hand, looking at his wrist closely. She knew he'd cut before, but all of the fresh ones…

"Lovino… Why?"

"Because."

"That's not a good enough answer." She frowned at him. "Please don't."

"Please don't what?"

"Kill yourself. I know you don't feel like it, but we do love you. I love you."

He sighed, not looking at her. "That's one person."

"Don't they say it's better to have one person who really does love you rather than a bunch who don't but pretend?"

No answer.

"Lovino, just please! Why does it matter if the others don't care?"

"It just does, Julchen! You wouldn't get it. I'm just forgotten. To them, it's all Feli. I just represent the crappy side."

"At least you represent something at all!"

Lovino blinked at Julchen's outburst. "…What?"

"I said, 'at least you represent something at all'. How do you think I feel? I don't even get anything! You're forgotten? Not at all. At least people know who you are. If you tell ask someone on the street what Prussia is, they have no idea. If anyone's forgotten, it would be me, not you."

"When did this turn into being about you?"

"When you acted like no one knows who you are. They do. Stop it. I don't even want to hear this."

"Then why not let me die?"

"Did I die when I learned that no one even knows who I am? Ha, nope! You just get over it. Life goes on."

"How can it when you don't even have anyone?"

"What am I to you?" she shook her head, then kissed him. "You really are an idiot."

I don't even know. So. Yeah. Here's a depressing fan fiction with a new pairing I'm in love with! Well, I loved Prumano for a while, but make it Fem!Prussia? I just. YES! Honestly, I do love yaoi, but I just love het pairings. They're so cute! 3

Anyways, yeah, this is only a one shot. Hope you liked it! Drop me a review if you did, okay? :)