Chapter 1.
I woke up at 6 O'clock, the usual time, and was greeted by the most horrible feeling in my stomach. I had school. I am 14, size 10, blond, blue eyes,come from a wealthy family, have a nice looking boyfriend and people would say I'm popular. Most people would assume from these few facts that i am the most happiest person alive. But I am not. I remember first starting school in September 2 or 3 years ago now, I remember it all so clearly. with my buttons all done up, my skirt down to my knees, my hair tied in a ponytail with colored hair bands that match my uniform, and a small group of friends of which i was happy with. Then came the day when suddenly that wasn't good enough for me anymore. For some unknown reason, i wanted to be popular. From that point I did everything in my power to become one of those "popular" people. calling them popular is such an amusing way to put it, popular usually means someone that is liked, but these people are not liked. In fact they are hated. walking around giving anyone that is not up to their expectations the most horrible looks anyone could stomach, bullying anyone above a size 10, and dating boys that only want one thing and one thing only. That is how most people think I am, expect I'm not. I have no one to blame but myself, i wanted to be in this kind of environment, and now i am i hate it. It serves me right for walking away from friends that have been with me for years for a bunch of fake low life's. though i can confidently say i am not one of those people that bully others, or call them names, but i am guilty for dating a horrible boy that only wants one thing. That one thing he has already had. That one thing i promised I would do with someone that i loved. However it doe snot matter whether i do these things or not, i am still labeled as one of them, and i do not blame these people that think this, i just wished they could see what im really like. These people that hate me, and wish they was me, and envy me, they don't realize i envy them just as much, i know it's my fault, but i cant help but wish i could be them. some of them are so pretty, but they just don't realize it. when these amazing looking but immature boys grow up, they will see that. they don't realize that in a couple of years everything will be fine for all of us. because right now, to all of us teenagers, high school is life, but unfortunately, high school is a load of bullshit.
What is one to do when they are in this kind of situation? how could you just leave a group like that, a group which are so scary and intimidating. I used to be a girl who could stick up for herself, i still am. if someone is treating me unfair i will say so, and i am not afraid to stick up for myself, but i am afraid however of being alone. if i chose to leave this group i would be all by myself, i have already brought up a reputation for myself, and now no one will want to be friends with someone who they think i am. I know i have done stupid things, and i have been to scared to stand up and fight against peer pressure, but right now, i know there is nothing i can do to change things i have done. for now i live on hating my life, until the time comes when i get to leave school. when i am free to become a new person. Only a couple more years left to go...
I spend the usual amount of time doing my hair, and putting my make up on, and before long i am walking through the gates of my high school to be greeted by jack. jack is my boyfriend. jack is a jerk. jack is a bully. jack is aggressive. jack is scary. but on some occasions, jack can actually be quite nice. he greets me now with a hug, and kisses me fully on the lips, i am not in the mood so i pull away, to this he seems embarrassed and angry and roughly pushes me away from him. i stumble backwards and bump into someone. instantly i turn round to apologize to the person i had aggravated not realizing that person would be so interesting and beautiful.
With dark brown hair, and bright green eyes, he was nothing out of the ordinary, but theres was something the way those green eyes looked at me. In those eyes it was evident there was blasts of maturity and kindness, and instantly i was drawn to him. I had never seen this boy before, and instantly came out of my bubble to find out.
" I'm so sorry!, I didn't mean to, it was an accident, are you okay?" i said partly because i was sorry but also because i was nervous.
he smiled up at me, and it was enough to make my heart stop. what was with this boy.
" who me? I'm fine. I'm a little more concerned about you, why is this boy pushing you, and more importantly why are you letting him?" said the unknown but amazing character before me.
instantly i felt a defense coming on.
" oh erm, uh, It's none of your business! now Ive said i'm sorry, but that gives you no right to stick your nose where its not wanted!" i shouted at him, like the bitch i knew him and everyone else in the school thought i was. and from that little display who could blame them. even now i still have no idea why i behaved like i did. I swiftly walked away from him in the opposite direction, feeling a huge blast of regret realizing i had not found out his name. why did i react like that? after mulling it over for a few more minutes i put it down to that he was being nosy, and it had aggravated me. but deep down i knew that wasn't true. it was because he made it look like he cared, it had shocked and startled me, and i knew that if i stood there and told him what really went on behind closed doors with me and jack, i would regret it later. That is no excuse, and that little act was then added to the long list of " what i have done wrong".
On my way to English jack had caught up with me, and put his arm round me. Most people would look at this and think it was a display of affection, but i knew better. He leaned down and whispered into my ear.
" meet me at the bike shed at lunch. be there. or else" He whispered sharply, but just before he pulled away he playfully nipped at my ear. I pulled away from him, and he just walked off laughing. I have never been able to understand why he acts like that, and why he is the way he is. he has never let me in that far, and i am pretty sure i don't want to find out, because whatever it is must not be pretty. But is that an excuse? No its not.
I made my way to science quickly, i wanted to get there quickly to take my mind off what might happen at lunch. he will either be nice and want to make out, or he'll be horrible and aggressive, to me both are bad. but both are nothing compared to what would happen if i didn't show up. I walk into science to notice that the green eyed boy from before is in fact in my science class. how could i have not noticed him? that just shows how much i was wrapped up in my own life. the second thing i notice is that the students are not sitting in their planned seats, this only means one thing. we are getting a new seating plan. part of me is excited as i want to be seated next to the green eyed boy, but the other half is scared i will be seated next to him, as i am fully aware he will ask questions, and as miss informs us on our seating plan, both sides argue it out with each other. In the end it turns out i am seated next to him, and i decide that i just have to suck it up. maybe he wont talk a tall, and maybe hes really boring.
I sit down quickly, and get my books out, and immediately i look up at the teacher and wait for her to start the lesson, meanwhile really hoping he wont talk.
" fancy seeing you again " he says as he flashes that amazing smile at me.
I say nothing, but i just smile at him nervously hoping that will be all. i was wrong.
" so are you going to tell me, why that boy was pushing you, or am i going to have to get it out of you?" he asked casually.
the bloody cheek!