Okay, so first off, when I imported this all my punctuation was all screwed up. Almost all of my apostrophes were missing, all of my quotes were gone, and one or two commas disappeared. I have no idea what happened since it as fine everywhere else I uploaded this as well as in the document itself. If you find anything odd, please inform me so I can fix it.
Note: Matt and Mello are not a pairing in this story. They were just in need of comfort, and the only people they trust happen to be each other. It's rather bittersweet really.
Disclaimer: Death Note is a series by Ohba and Obata. I make no money in writing this, I just find it enjoyable.
The room was abysmal in its darkness, damp and cold from the slightly crooked window frame that let the glass sit at an awkward, not-completely-closed, angle. A dull glow from the street lights down below this floor pervaded the gloom, illuminating various dust particles that floated off unclean surfaces. A blaring car horn in the alley shattered the silence, a whisper of cloth following suite.
There was a gasp, sounding more like a cry, and then a shuddering exhale. Mello stared up at the ceiling, blurry teal eyes open wide, and slowly became more and more alert as awareness overrode sleep. A clammy hand darted out towards his left, expecting his best and only friend to be in bed by now. The sheets were cold. Realizing that the gamer was probably passed out in the living room, Mello moved onto his side, curling up tightly. Yet another night he dreamt of what seemed like the inevitable, a searing pain and screams to end it all. The pressure in his chest was heavier tonight, and for good reason, he believed. After that call with Halle, his dreams were getting more and more vivid, frightening in their realism. The end was steadily arriving. It was approaching his unprotected body step by unfaltering step.
He felt his throat tighten as tears pricked at his eyes. He couldn't afford to get all emotional, he told himself, it would just make matters worse. Even so, the traitorous fluids built up and spilled over, running in silent lines across the angles of his nose and cheekbones. He folded himself up tighter, trying to collect himself before his vocal chords decided to chime in and essentially blow his cover.
It was at this opportune moment of course, Mello noted bitterly that Matt decided to retire from the lumpy sofa to the less lumpy mattress. He stumbled in, half awake, to collapse in an equally ungraceful manner beside Mello. For a moment he disregarded the blonde's stance, thinking that it was from the chill, but then a sobering realization dawned upon his foggy mind. "Mel?" The single word sounded like a bomb.
He received a hiccup of a sob as an answer, one that escaped from between Mello's lips despite the efforts to contain it. A shift and Matt wrapped his arms around Mello, concerned and absolutely terrified with those salty streaks to blame. "Mello, what's wrong?"
Mello said nothing; he just continued trying to quell his emotions, and put back on his bland yet angry mask he had grown accustomed to using as of late. It didn't work. If anything, his tears worsened as Matt laced his fingers in Mello's golden locks, combing through gently and massaging at his scalp. They had never been this physically close before save for when they were really little, yet it felt so familiar and warm.
Matt bit his lip, chewing for a moment, a sudden craving for a cigarette washing over him. "Talk to me, Mel." He looked down at the fragile creature in his arms, and watched as more tears fell.
Mello rolled his eyes upwards, studying Matt's worried expression. "I," A hesitant pause interrupted him, and he looked away, unable to retain eye contact, "Please don t ask." He buried his face in Matt's neck, dampening the skin there as he finally gave in, the sound of his crying replacing all other sound.
Oh God, Mello. Matt was getting a bit wet eyed himself at the display. This wasn't how Mello should be acting. Mello was so much stronger than this. Whatever it was that upset him must be bad.
They remained like that for some time. Mello slowly calmed down, and for a moment Matt thought he had fallen asleep. That would be an awkward experience, truth be told. They may share a bed, but they sleep on the very opposite sides. Holding each other like this would just be odd. At least, it would be come morning and Mello's emotions were once more balanced as normal. However, Mello shifted, a pair of bloodshot but startling bright eyes meeting Matt's through the goggles. There was a broken look in those eyes, a tired and defeated edge. Matt might be third, but he was still a genius, and his mind was slowly putting everything together.
"We're not going to die." The expression those words caused cinched it. That's what Mello had been thinking about. "We're not. We can't." Matt felt a sad smile break out, twisted up the edges of his lips, but not matching the frown hidden by orange lenses. Even he didn't believe what he said, but he wanted to. They both were very much aware of what was most likely going to occur to the pair of them, but neither wanted to acknowledge the fact that they knew. If they didn't think it, maybe it wouldn't happen? Denial at its finest.
"Of course not." Mello maneuvered himself in Matt's arms, not to get away but to make himself more comfortable.
Matt was about to say something, but then there were warm lips on his, and he forgot his English entirely. Without even thinking, he pressed back, tightening his grip on Mello's slight frame. A wet and hot muscle swept across his lips and he parted them willingly, allowing Mello's tongue entrance and tentatively reaching out with his own. Never before had he ever imagined that he'd be kissing Mello, of all people, in this manner.
In the meantime, the ex-Mafioso fisted Matt's striped tee in both hands, holding onto him as if he were about to slip away. Desperate for the contact, Mello sought to deepen the kiss, becoming needier as it progressed. When breaking for air, their eyes met, hindered by those damned goggles. Mello unlatched his hands and pushed the offending lenses up, and carefully removing them, tossing them lightly to the floor.
"You look sad." Mello brought a hand up, cupping Matt's cheek and rubbing a thumb along his cheekbone.
Matt smiled his sad smile again. "None more so than you." Gently, Matt rolled the two of them over so Mello was on his back and looking up. He bent down and kissed at those awaiting lips again. Unlike before, Mello reached up to tangle his fingers in Matt s hair, bringing him closer.
Matt ran a hand along his friend's stomach, pushing up at the black tank top that the blonde had donned before slipping into bed. He skimmed over the flat plane that made up his abs, and splayed his fingers at the base of his ribcage. Breaking the kiss and backing up, Matt began to press his lips softly to the path he had just set with his palm. Mello's breath hitched and a soft whimper floated up when Matt brushed across his sharp hipbones. No words needed to be exchanged to know what was set in motion.
Without being prompted, Mello reached down and brought the tank top up and over his head, carelessly throwing it aside. Matt immediately set to explore this newly exposed skin, licking and nipping at the milky hills and valleys of ribs, pink tongue darting out over a dusky nipple before encasing it in wet warmth.
It was all soft and careful, loving caresses and passionate kisses. It was a perfect display of love despite the fact that that wasn't the case. This sex was simply for the contact, the closeness. Two souls fiercely sought another to be one with, to force away the loneliness and despair that threatened to bring them under. Matt cradled Mello as he rocked against him, the latter writhing and gasping at the sensations caused, clinging securely. Matt climaxed quietly, face buried in Mello's shoulder while Mello threw his head back, what should be a moan sounding more like a forlorn sob. Both had tears staining their faces.
They lay there afterwords, gasping for breath and waiting for limps to work once more. After he was able to move again, Matt pressed his forehead to Mello's, holding the other's face between both of his hands so he couldn't look away. "Mello," This is it. "Mello, I love you. We re not going to die."
Mello almost believed it.
But then you can't stop the inevitable.
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