Forget Me Not

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She's the girl you never bothered to speak to.

She was always there. You passed by her in the hallway by the window next to her classroom so many times but not once did you stop to talk to her.

But why would you? You didn't know her and she didn't know you. You didn't even share the same class as her; in fact, she was an upperclassman. There was no reason for any interaction.

She was always alone, though. You'd think a girl as pretty as her would have a bunch of friends. That's how school had always been; all the kids flocked around the beautiful girls. The boys especially would go for the busty ones.

But every time you saw her, she was by herself. You had never seen her at lunchtime, so you wondered if she ate alone as well.

Maybe she was just really quiet that so many people had tried talking to her but gave up when she never spoke. Or maybe she was shy and whenever she talked, it was with a nervous stutter that ended up driving people away. It would be difficult to talk to someone you couldn't understand.

Could she have been snarky? She may have drove people away with her rudeness. She certainly didn't look that way, but you couldn't judge a book by its cover.

Or maybe she just didn't have time for friends. She could have visited cram school most evenings and was aiming high for the top high school in the area.

This girl specifically always had your attention, but you could never figure out why. Was it because she was always alone? But that seemed silly. Lots of students left for home by themselves, that wasn't unusual.

This girl, though…she stuck out for some reason. The days passed by and she was always on your mind. You felt a strong urge to speak to her, but what would you say? How would you even go about starting a conversation with her?

You told yourself that by the end of the week, you would finally stop to talk to her. There was no hurt in trying to make new friends. Maybe she was a really sweet girl.

Maybe she just didn't know how to make friends.

Monday goes by. Followed by Tuesday. Wednesday…

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Thursday comes. It's just another day.

You walk to school feeling like there's been something that you've been meaning to do all week, but you can't recall what it is. You begin to fret over whether you finished all of your homework, but during homeroom you check to make for sure it's all complete. Sure enough it is.

Then what is that pestering feeling in the back of your mind? It bugs you all day but you go home that night never being able to figure it out. You have a test you need to study for but there's no way you can concentrate. You end up going to bed that night having accomplished nothing.

You dream about a taller girl with curly pigtails. You don't recognize her, but she looks really happy to see you. She grabs your hand and an unfamiliar voice echoes in your ears, even after you wake up.

I won't be lonely anymore. You won't forget me, will you?

You decide to get to school early today. For some reason, your feet seem to take over as you wind up in front of a random classroom. The students are a grade higher than you, and you're positive that you don't recognize a single student here.

Instead, it's not the classroom itself that you're focused on. It's the large window opposite of it in the hallway. You feel as if there should be someone standing here overlooking the view of the courtyard.

But there's no one here and there will never be anyone here.

The warning bell rings and you have three minutes to make it to class. But you don't make a single move.

Instead, tears roll down your cheeks and your heart starts to hurt. You're suddenly depressed, but you have no idea why. Those words from the dream ring in your head again and you can't help but whisper,

"I'm sorry."

You stand there for ten more minutes crying before you decide to take a trip to the infirmary. You just need to take a break today, so you lay in the bed and take a nap.

You dream of that girl again. Every night afterwards you do. She never says anything, but she always smiles.

And every day before homeroom you walk past that window and apologize.

You'll never know why you do it, but you regret not having stopped by that window before.