Before anything, I just want to say that this was a personal headcanon of mine, that I started playing around with it because it kind of made sense in my head, and hopefully it does in all yours. Of course I will forever ship Densi and Neric and this is a far stretch from anything else I've put up, I just wanted to play with the Deeks and Nell friendship and a story for them. There is some Neric.
Her hands gripped the strap of her shoulder bag as she slowly backed away, disappearing from the small group, (is it even disappearing if they don't even acknowledge I'm here most of the time?) The further she moved back the bigger her steps were until she was far enough back that she could just turn herself around and hastily move towards the archway and out of the building. She hated working here; everyone always looked at her as though she were only temporary and that they didn't really need her. That's what she had been thinking lately too. (Maybe I should just quit, I don't see them warming up any time soon, that Detective Deeks has been here a month more than me and he looks like he's still in the testing stage. Maybe they were right, I am too young for this job, I've always been head first with everything I guessed this would be that same.)
Nell felt her throat tightening as she got closer to her car. Would she tell Hetty that she no longer wanted to work here, or would she continue to play her mother's words in her head 'To get to the light you always have to go through some dark.' Nell thought if she walked in on the first day like it wasn't her first, people would treat her as such, but these people were trained to see past that, and it didn't work. First impressions mattered and she had screwed hers up multiple times.
She had decided it, she was talking to Hetty tomorrow, she was telling her the job was a nice offer but it just wasn't for her. She had done her best, she tried to have a new outlook on it. But today had done it. She thought Eric was nice at first, he had seemed like he was getting used to her, but she had obviously gotten the wrong idea. He completely spaced her. Starting with not waiting for her to arrive to start a briefing, not telling her things she would need to know for the case, and then getting her to tell Hetty how they wrapped up, him not even showing. Also he was acting awkward around her anytime she tried to have a conversation.
But first off, she needed a drink, alcohol, and a lot of it. She knew there was a bar five minutes away but she wanted less people to see her drink away her night, so she decided to go to one she had heard was never visited by tourists and away from the loud and crowded LA. (Quiet and out of anyone's way, sounds more like it.)
By the time she arrived, it was dark, only a single light from the place; it came through the colored window panes which created odd patterns on the concrete below. She stepped up to the green framed door, at opening it a bell chimed, the slight smell of cigars hit her nose, and Aerosmith was playing softly on a single speaker.
"Sorry sweetheart, we're closed," came a low voice from behind the bar. The man looked around his early fifties, was wearing a faded Hard Rock Cafe shirt and a handlebar mustache. "Try the place around the corner. Plus, this place ain't exactly suited for girls like you." He turned his back, mumbling to himself.
Nell stood there for a few moments, silent as she thought over what to do next. But she heard her name being called and it brought her out of her thoughts and back to reality.
"Nell, is that you?" came a voice from around the corner, along with the sound of a metal stool legs being pushed back against the hardwood floor.
Her brows knitted as she squinted against the darkness, "Deeks? Uh, yeah, but I was just, leaving," she pointed over her shoulder, backing against the door with a thud, then clumsily working on the door handle. She could still feel the lump in her throat, and she hated it, she always tried to present herself as tough, and not look as weak as her doll dresses and pixie cut hair would make her seem.
"Hey, no, you came here for a reason. Come, sit," he turned around in his seat and looked the red head over; something was wrong. "Hey Danny, she's with me. It's okay."
The man at the bar nodded and dropped a set of keys on the counter, "Just lock up when you're done here Marty, you know the drill," Danny nodded to Nell, eyeing her slightly before removing himself from behind the bar and leaving out a back room.
Deeks pushed himself up from the seat in the corner and made his way back over to the bar. "I won't bite, come on, spill your troubles, Nell," he offered a smile to his newest friend and started pouring beer from the tap. "Why did you come here?"
Nell nodded, and walked over to the high stool in front of the counter. She still felt nervous, they had worked together, talked, he had tried joking with her, but she had just wanted to do her job, so she didn't really know him past him being a cop and using humor as a defense mechanism. She pulled out the seat and climbed onto it, finding it slightly embarrassing, but the Detective showed no signs that he had noticed.
"So, what brought you here, Nell?" he handed over a half a glass of beer. Nell gave him an expectant look, he rolled his eyes. "Hey, I don't want you to be hammered before you tell me why you came this place late after work. Because there are only two reasons, and none of them come to mind when looking at you."
She took a sip of her drink, "And what would be those two things, Detective?"
"Well, one, you're not a middle aged man trying to not lose everything in a divorce after a gunshot wedding straight out of High School."
"True," Nell nodded.
"And you don't regret any life decisions, true?" he looked down at the younger woman and noticed a change. Her posture stiffened and her fists scrunched on her lap. "Or you do..." his eyes narrowed. "What's up Little Red?"
"Don't call me that," she bit back, "Sorry," she immediately apologized. "Look, I just think I should go, see you tomorrow," she slipped off the stool and turned away from him.
"Hey, hey, no stay," he came around the bar and stopped her. "Look, something is obviously bothering you. And figuring stuff out is kinda' my job, so just tell me okay, we're friends right?" he noticed how she didn't meet his eyes, she was thinking whether or not to stay.
She let out a shaky sigh, but without saying anything she grabbed the edge of her seat again and pushed herself back on top. She grabbed the glass and kept her eyes down as she heard the Detective pull another seat closer to sit beside her. She let the silence settle as she downed half of her drink, the only sound being heard was the glass back on the wood.
"You're obviously upset, and I'm willing to wait here all night to find out. So just, out with it."
She shook her head, exhaling a nervous laugh, "Not even I'm willing for that." She rubbed her finger over the condensation on the glass. Sighing, she began to finally talk aloud on how she had been feeling for the past two weeks. "It's just, I thought this job would be a huge step up for me, I was so happy when I got offered, being my age and in this profession, it's rare when people only judge you by your skills and not your age when selecting you. It was a huge choice to decide to move to California for this, I had to leave behind a huge family, friends, everyone I ever loved. Which where I come from is basically an entire town, and... and it's just been a big letdown."
The blonds brows furrowed seeing the sorrowed features of the petite woman's face, "You don't like working for NCIS? You always seem so... eager about work."
"Yeah, well don't get used to it. I'm quitting on Friday. I'm done." She downed the rest of her drink. "It's not worth it. Helping find the bad people, I guess that's what got me to stick through the two weeks, but I don't belong, it's easy to see that."
Deeks finally realized what Nell was going on about, he had gone through it, he was still going through it. It was like being the awkward step brother of the family, like you were only there because you were made to, and you're placed into a family that doesn't exactly think it needs you. A family with a hard shell that could break and crumble if you jabbed it in the right place, resilient and objecting when you've figured your way in. A place you had to prove yourself to if you wanted to fit in. He had pretty much failed at the police department, where he was only respected by the few, coming into an even closer knit group had made him want to try harder than he had before. "Is that really what you want Nell, to give up? The Nell Jones I've seen racing around OSP, she doesn't seem like the forfeiting kind of girl." She hadn't been here long, true, but the Detective believed she could make it, she may need a little help though.
Nell reached over the bar, pouring herself another drink, this time to the top, "I just don't see what the point is Deeks, I try my best but it's like it goes unnoticed. How long do I have to do that until I finally feel like one of the team." She began to drink her next glass, it was slowly erasing all the problems she was currently trying to solve. "I mean, most of the time now, Eric won't look me in the eye."
He nodded along, taking another sip of his beer and waited a few seconds before speaking again. "Well you're lucky, you found the right Detective. I know what you're going through Nell. I've been through it, in some way I still don't think Sam or Callen think I should be here. But you know what? You've already proved those two wrong without knowing it."
She rolled her eyes before looking back up to the Detective. "Really, how?"
"On your third day, when you took over Eric's whistle duties - heads up, I wouldn't do that again - Sam said you would fold in the tent like all the other analysts, that no one has lasted long. But Nell, you're still here, you haven't given up yet," he watched as she placed the half finished glass back down and her hazel irises came back to his. "And coming from me, I don't think you should, you're good at what you do, Nell. I've seen you try prove that multiple times, just give them time."
She didn't know if it was the alcohol controlling her movements or her emotions, probably both, but she moved forward, her lips connecting with Deeks', and the strangest thing was, he closed his eyes and began to kiss back. They both knew it was wrong straight away and it would never lead to any good.
The first sign was when Deeks came off the stool to put his hands on her waist, he had misjudged the space in between them and the seat rocked backwards. Nell would have gone with it and fallen on her backside if he hadn't have caught her, after both of them mumbled awkward apologies they returned to demanding each others mouths. The second was when Deeks tried to take off his jacket. He was trying to do that at the same time they walked backwards towards the pool table and his arm got caught in the sleeve. His arm started to spasm and he made a fit to shake it out, causing Nell to harshly back up into the table, bruising her tailbone. The third was an effect from the last, when they were on top of the table, as he finally got the arm out, it whacked off a left out glass from the table and sent it crashing to the ground, making Nell jump away and let out a short scream.
The both stared down at the mess of glass and alcohol before slowly meeting each others eyes, knowing that should have never happened. They didn't need to talk about it, not now, not ever again. It was in the heat of the moment and that's how it will would be left.
"Look, I'll clean this up, you go home," Deeks spoke up first, running a hand through his shaggy blonde hair and slipping off the edge before offering Nell his hand to help her down.
Nell nodded sharply, her eyes not moving, going over how much of an idiot she had been. "Thanks, and I'm sorry," she gave a half smile.
"It's fine, just promise me you'll give it at least one more week," he asked, she gave off an expression like she was unsure about it.
After a few silent moments of chewing the inside of her lip she agreed, "Okay, one more week, but it's on you if it blows up in my face." She turned back towards the door. "Goodnight Detective."
"Night. Oh and Nell," he waited until she looked around again, "About Eric being all awkward around you, don't blame him, it's probably not for the same reason as everything else."
Confused, but not wanting to stay in the chilly wind anymore, she gave a slight smile before leaving out the door, leaving him behind, and finding her way back to the car in the now dark night.
Years later.
Nell looked back into his darling green eyes as she felt his fingers twine with hers as they made their way around the tables, offering a 'thank you' and 'hi' to everyone who turned their way with broad smiles. She couldn't be happier than she was today. She didn't think she had ever smiled so much. When she looked back at Eric she felt, loved, secure, wanted and she felt home, and she knew nothing could change that.
"I love you," he whispered just before pressing his lips to hers and placing a hand on her hip, over the white dress.
Nell placed a hand over where his heart was, she got the same feeling when they kissed, because this was how you should feel when you kiss the right person. As he pulled her in closer, another uproar of cheering and claps filled the room. Their grinning made them separate and press their foreheads together. "I love you, too," she whispered. When she pulled back they both turned around to face the rest of the room, Nell spotted Deeks in amongst the crowd, clapping along with that usual goofy grin. Nell squeezed Eric's hand and turned to speak in a hush, "I'm just going to go talk to Deeks," she told her now husband.
His brows furrowed, "What for?"
"Don't worry, I have to thank him for something, I'll be right back," she replied.
Eric kissed her forehead and Nell felt her entire face warm, "Be back soon, Mrs Beale," again they both grinned, they couldn't help but share another kiss, they both knew they would never tire of hearing that.
Nell felt weird when she moved away from Eric, but she pushed through and made her way over to her friend, who was watching Kensi talk with one of Nell's brothers. Even though they had been together for the past three years he was still jealous of anyone that came close to Kensi. His eyes then moved to Nell, "Hey, how do you feel? I haven't seen that smile drop since we all got here."
That comment made another rush of feelings wash over the redhead, "Ecstatic, I never want to stop feeling like this; it's probably the best feeling in the world. Which reminds me, you and Kensi, you better ask her soon too, you're perfect for each other, you love each other to death and it's way over due. If you don't ask her I will make you ask her because- Why are you grinning like that?"
His eyes went down, his hand coming out of his pocket as well as a little blue box, "I'm waiting for tonight, she'll be in a good mood after this, so it'll be the best time," he answered in a low voice.
Nell nearly squealed in delight, "Anytime is the best time, I personally know she has been on the edge of her seat waiting for you to ask. Thank god you came to your senses, I can't wait to watch you two walk up the aisle."
"Well she has to say yes first," he replied nervously.
"Trust me, she will. Now, why I came over here. You have no idea how much I owe you Marty Deeks, if you hadn't of convinced me to stay years ago, I wouldn't be the happiest person on earth I am today, I wouldn't have all you guys, I wouldn't have had this family, and I wouldn't have had Eric. Thank you."
"It's no problem Little Red."
"Don't call me that."
Again, this is new writing for me, reveiws would really help, Thank you :)