Of Frostbite and Ice Queens

A look into the North/Central (or is it Eastern?) joint training mentioned briefly in chapter 74.

"It's cold!"

"Shut up, Havoc." Despite the reprimand, Roy couldn't completely suppress his hiss as he removed his gloves and flexed his stiff fingers. "We all know it's not fun. Deal with it."

The door to the outside opened, letting a fresh blast of cold air in and almost knocking Havoc over. The rest of Mustang's men stumbled in, tired from the day's exercises.

After shedding coats and gloves, the small group sat at the table and chatted about their day. Riza removed a packet from her pocket and took her earrings from it, kneading her earlobes a bit before putting the posts back in their place. Her hands, too, seemed to have a hard time of it, red from the cold even through the thick gloves they'd all been supplied.

"You okay?" It was Roy who asked the question.

Riza nodded. "Fine. I'm just as unused to the cold as the rest of you."

"Yeah, but you're a damn sight more valuable than some of us," Havoc told her. "You can still focus through all that. How do you do it?"

"Just putting my mind to it, I guess. Same as anything else." Riza massaged her palm out towards her fingers, wincing as the feeling came back in full force. "One thing at a time."

"Some of us can barely do that," Roy mumbled, happy just to be back inside.

Fuery, who was de-fogging his glasses, chimed, "Some of us have more than one thing to worry about at a time."

"And some of us have don't have time to worry at all because there are more important things going on," said a rather commanding voice from the door to the rest of the complex.

The six of Mustang's group stood and saluted General Armstrong. "Hawkeye, while I appreciate your dedication and will not deny that you have talent, you'd do well to remember that one thing at a time is sometimes slow enough to get you killed."

"Hold on a minute, General Armstrong—" Roy started

"You know the Briggs motto, Mustang: Survival of the fittest. I was simply stating a fact, not insulting Lieutenant Hawkeye. Small wonder she's not nearly as bad as you are, for as long as you've all been together. Then again, there are few who could even dream of living up… or possibly down to your reputation."

Roy looked very ready to spit something right back at the ice queen, but bit it back. He had no desire to deal with whatever punishment she would hand out. He clenched a fist tightly, then released it. "I apologize for jumping to conclusions, General Armstrong."

Looking him square in the eye, General Armstrong said frostily, "I don't doubt it. Good day." She wheeled around and walked out of the room.

"She is possibly the one woman I would never date," Havoc murmured softly, in case General Armstrong was still within earshot.

"Possibly?" Roy whispered as they sat. "Definitely. I'm worried about you if you're still considering it with any degree of seriousness."

Breda barked a short laugh. "I'm worried about you if you ever considered it."

Roy smiled wryly. "Touché."

There was a short silence, then Falman asked, "You don't think she's recruiting?"

That made everyone stop. General Armstrong's treatment of Riza was definitely something to worry about if that was the case.

Riza was very aware of the attention now being focused on her. Before she could say anything, however, Havoc was in front of her, taking her hands and begging, "Please say you won't leave us! You know we'd never get anything done without you!" He punctuated this with a rather pointed look at Roy, who sputtered indignantly.

"Perhaps it's time you learned, then," Riza responded simply.

"Hey, the rest of us do just fine, Havoc!" Breda chided. "It's you and the Colonel—no offense, Sir."

Roy shook his head. "None taken."

Riza sighed. "She hasn't made any offer, Havoc, nor do I believe she will. General Armstrong and I… don't see eye-to-eye on certain issues. Anyway, the Colonel would have to sign off on it unless it was an order. I think you're safe for the moment."

"We're safe? What about you? You dislike us that much?" Roy raised an eyebrow.

"I never said that!" Riza said quickly. "It was Havoc who wanted reassuring!"

Roy immediately looked contrite. "Sorry. I was joking. You're tired. Not exactly the best mix, huh?"

Riza shook her head. "Not really, no." She reached up and undid her clip, sighing heavily. "What I wouldn't give for a nice, warm bed right now."

Falman stood. "A nice, warm beverage will have to do. I'll go get us some coffee."

Without a word, Fuery pushed back his chair and dragged himself to join his friend in the quest for the small comfort.

"So… you and General Armstrong don't see eye-to-eye on… how did you phrase it? Certain issues?" wheedled Havoc. "Care to discuss?"

"No, Havoc, I don't."

"Got it."

Roy grinned. "Havoc, I swear, you gossip like an old woman sometimes!"

Havoc rounded on Roy. "Oh, and you don't?"

"I'm gathering information! There's a difference!"

"Oh yeah? Prove it!"

"I gather sensitive information, Havoc! I'm not about to tell you any more than you need to know!"

"Pffff… Right. So I suppose all your time spent flirting with girls is 'gathering sensitive information'¸ too?"

Roy froze for the tiniest fraction of a second before laughing. "All sorts of valuable info you can get from women, Havoc, but I guess you wouldn't know, would you?"

"That's low."

"Can't be afraid to play dirty in this profession!" Roy said in a sing-song voice. "I wish Armstrong could hear me now; playing dirty is the epitome of survival of the fittest!"

"Survival of the fittest is also getting rid of your enemies. I wonder if I should report you to Central for suspected treason…" General Armstrong, who had quietly appeared in the doorway again, seemed to be giving it some serious thought.

"Thought you didn't consider me a threat," taunted Roy.

"But you are an annoyance, and who's to say you're not reporting to Central behind my back?"

Roy sighed. "My dear General Armstrong, you run too clean an operation up here. What would I have to report?"

"There's a good dog." Though the words were sweet, there was a definite venom behind them. General Armstrong turned to leave. "Try not to let that leash choke you, Mustang!"

"Threat, warning, or friendly advice?" Havoc wanted to know.

Roy shrugged. "Damned if I know. She's gotta be the one woman I can't figure out."

"I don't think anyone's got her figured out," Breda said. He turned to Riza. "Do you?"

Riza shook her head. "And quite frankly, I don't plan to until she presents herself as more of a threat than a wild card."

"But you know she's a wild card," Havoc pointed out.

"I know that she dislikes Central as much as any of us, and she makes it no secret that she's looking out for herself, and only her. Her motto, you know."

Havoc whistled. "Does anything escape you?"

In a deadpan so flat that even Riza almost forgot she was joking, she replied, "You'd be surprised."

"Ah. Thought not."

The beginnings of a smile quirked at the corners of Riza's mouth. "That you even have to ask sometimes makes me wonder if anything doesn't escape you."

Havoc pretended to look wounded as Roy let out a surprised laugh.

Falman and Fuery came back a moment later with coffee for everyone. There was a collective wince as they took their first sips.

"So this is how they keep alert here," Havoc choked. "Or maybe it's just a joke at our expense?"

"I dunno," Breda told him. "Wouldn't surprise me if they liked their coffee this strong." There were murmurs of agreement.

"You know," Roy started, "as much as none of us are really attached to Central—" he exchanged a brief look with Riza "—I think we are all going to appreciate it a lot more when we get back."

"I'd drink to that, but you'll just have to take my word for it." Havoc set down his cup. "Hell, I appreciate it more right now."

Everyone else made sounds of agreement, but Roy looked especially contemplative.

Riza waved a hand in front of his face. "Colonel?"

Roy smirked. "Just thinking that General Armstrong can run this place however she wants. It works, after all. Then again, when I get to the top, I might think differently. We'll just have to wait and see."

It took only a second, then everyone in the room was smiling.

"One thing, Chief." Havoc waited until everyone was looking at him. "Don't make us wait too long."

"Don't worry," Roy told him, suddenly straight-faced. "I won't."

A/N: Wow. That just kind of went on and on and never really got anywhere, but then, that was kind of the point. I just imagine that this would be the way they would act during down-time. That's all, really.

Okay, that and Gimpyhair over on FMA(dot)com wrote and drew an absolutely hilarious comic about General Armstrong trying to entice Riza to join the Briggs crew. It was better than this is. Meh. Still posting this.

Well, I hope I can get something up on/before next Thursday. I have an idea for a drabble series, but updates probably won't be planned out very well. You know, college. But that's life.

Let me know what you think!