A/N: Hey guys! I'm Robyn, and I've never written about Doctor Who before.
I tried this advice column thingy with Les Miserables, and it has been very successful so I decided to do a Doctor Who spin-off here.
I only started watching DW last year, but I know a lot. I've watched the old series. My favorite Doctors are Five and Ten. Also, K9 is a boss.
So, what you need to do is send me YOUR questions! Just tell me which Doctor you'd like me to answer as, which companions you'd like to be included, and you are guaranteed a chapter dedicated to your question!
Also, read "Ask Auntie Enjolras," my other advice column fic thingy, if you'd like to know what my style is like.
Sorry if this has been done before, I searched to see if there was and nothing came up, so... yeah. Also, I'm not the best at talking British... meh.
Here we gooooo
DOCTOR: Ten
COMPANION: Donna (and Rose)
"Where are we going today, Doctor?" Donna asked from her place on the floor of the control room.
"Meh... I don't really feel like going anywhere today... What do you suggest we do?" I replied.
"Well, for starters, you can check your email inbox," Donna said, forcibly making me checking my email. Why do I even have an email? I'm the bloody Doctor! Oh, well...
"Why are all of these questions?" I exclaimed, scrolling down my list of unopened emails.
"I may or may not have made you open up your own advice column online. Hint: I did," Donna smiled from behind me.
"Donna Noble, you are truly a piece of work..." I muttered in response. I clicked on the first email.
It read:
Dear Doctor,
Why do you hate pears so much? I think they are super special awesome. I do not understand you.
Sincerely-izzle,
I love PEARakeets
"Am I really supposed to answer this?" I turned to Donna.
"Have you got anything better to do, spaceman?"
Sighing, I began to type my reply.
Dear PEARakeets,
Pears are gross. Um...
I guess there is no better way to answer this as to tell you about the first time I ate a pear...
It goes a little something like this...
ANECDOTE TIME!
Rose and I were sitting in a cafe in Normandy, I still have no idea why.
"Did you know that in this region of France, they are famous for a drink called poiré, which is a pear cider?" Rose said excitedly.
"That's very interesting, Rose, how did you come about that fact?" I replied, scraping dirt off my trainers.
"Aw, ya know, Mum and I are were planning on taking a little trip to France one day. It was going to be really excitin'..." she smiled in return.
"And here you are!" I laughed.
"Here I am," Rose sighed.
Rose flagged over a waiter, but then realized that she couldn't speak French. Me, being awesome, decided to order this poiré stuff.
"Nous voudrions une tasse de poiré, si'l vous plaît," I said. The waiter went away to get our order.
"Nice," Rose nodded.
"I have a confession to make, Rose Tyler, a secret that not many people know about," I whispered, leaning in towards her.
"What?"
"I... I... um," I looked around, "I have never eaten a pear before."
Rose burst out laughing, "I'm sorry, what? In all your million-billion years of life, you have never once eaten a pear?"
"Well first of all, Rose, I'm not a million billion, I'm nine-hundred seven. And, no, I've ust never gotten a chance to eat a pear. Just never really got around to it, at least in this regeneration."
"Oh my gosh," she smiled, still laughing, "well then this pear cider poiré thing is really going to be a treat for you, huh?"
"Yeah, I guess. I'm pretty excited," I grinned.
Soon after, the waiter brought us our drinks. There was a little slice of pear wedged on the top of the glass. Rose suggested that I eat that first.
"Today, Rose Tyler, is a big day in history. I, the Doctor, am about to digest a pear. Ladies and gentlemen, here I go!"
Rose clapped.
I ceremoniously lifted the pear up and then by my mouth. I took a decent-sized bite. A few seconds later I promptly spat out the vile fruit.
"Ick! What is this? Do you people actually eat this stuff?" I stood and shouted, nearly knocking over my chair.
"Uh, yeah, we people actually eat this 'stuff!'" Rose said, aghast, "It's delicious!" She sat happily munching on her pear and sipping her poiré.
"Rose, have you ever tasted the tears of a puppy? The sadness of a baby seahorse? The cry of a lonely chickadee?" I exclaimed, getting the attention of nearly everyone in the cafe.
"Doctor, please. Calm down," Rose said.
"Rose Tyler, I demand an answer!"
"No, Doctor, I have never tasted any of those things," she rolled her eyes.
"Excuse me, I have to go eat some celery now. I'll be back," I strolled out of the cafe and to a nearby vegetable stand.
"Celery?" she asked while I was walking away.
BACK TO THE LETTER!
Well, there you have it, PEARakeet, my first time eating a pear.
They're gross. You're wrong. Ha.
Anywhoodles, I gotta go. Donna and I are thinking about actually going somewhere today now.
Bye!
The Doctor