Inside Summary: Harry Potter is fed up with life. During his fourth year he begins to cut himself and it soon becomes an obsession. After Sirius dies Harry doesn't fell the will to live anymore and tries to commit suicide. Severus Snape and Draco Malfoy become his unlikely heroes. Of course he isn't too grateful that they stopped him from being with his family but they are determined to help him survive the war and future.

Heed Warnings!

A/N: Warnings: slash HP/DM, attempted suicide, HG/BZ, GW/NL, SS/RL...don't like don't read...

Disclaimer: Only the plot is mine. Everything else belongs to J.K. Rowling, also known as the Sirius killer, Dumbledoor murdering, author of Harry Potter. ;P Or Nickelback cuz I used their song, heh, almost forgot that.

Title: Too Many Scars

Chapter One: Savin' Me

He stared at his wrists. They were calling out for his razor or knife, heck anything sharp would do. He knew this wasn't the best way to go. Suicide. It was indeed an intriguing thought. Death was just the next great adventure. He smirked and wondered what Dumbledore would say if he left that as a note after he was gone. The thought sobered him some. Was he really going to do this? Could he? Slowly thoughts came to mind of all the times he was imprisoned here. All the times he told Dumbledore how the Dursleys treated him simply to be brushed aside as if it were nothing. It was that knowledge that proved his theory. No one cared about Harry; all they cared about was Harry Potter, the one with the power to defeat the Dark Lord. The Boy-Who-Lived and all that shit. He was the maid cleaning up someone else's mistakes. The tool for everyone to use and put back, whether he was okay where they placed him or not. Well not anymore. He was going to live his life how he wanted or not at all. He was tired of having to look over his shoulder every 5 minutes for fear of having Voldemort creeping up on him or his "friends." He was going to be free after this. You can hold in a man's body but not his mind. And this mind had done some serious thinking over the last school year. All he really wanted was for someone to see him, Harry. To be there when he needed them and not the other way around.

Prison gates won't open up for me
On these hands and knees I'm crawlin'
Oh, I reach for you
Well I'm terrified of these four walls
These iron bars can't hold my soul in
All I need is you
Come please I'm callin'
And oh I scream for you
Hurry I'm fallin', I'm fallin'

He knew that leaving the wizarding world in chaos was wrong, very wrong. But his sense of right and wrong left with Sirius. Sirius had loved him for him, it seemed anyway. He wasn't entirely sure about that even. Sometimes he caught Sirius looking at him in a way that seemed to scream "You're nothing like James, where did you go wrong?" He wondered briefly if Sirius had been disappointed before he had fallen through the veil; disappointed he hadn't been able to ensure Harry was just like James. And yeah is as powerful, if not more so, than his father. But that isn't what he held in high regards like James had. He just wanted one thing, the thing he had been denied his entire life. He wanted someone to say "I love you, Harry." Just Harry. No Potter. If someone had been willing to say that and mean it then maybe he wouldn't be here now. Maybe he could live again. But apparently he wasn't worth the trouble to actually love. No, they simply pretended so they could cash in when he was dead. The saddest part is that it didn't even hurt anymore. He was that used to the idea of being used.

Show me what it's like
To be the last one standing
And teach me wrong from right
And I'll show you what I can be
Say it for me
Say it to me
And I'll leave this life behind me
Say it if it's worth saving me

Well no need to delay the inevitable.

Slice.

There, it is done. Harry didn't believe in the saying "Good-bye cruel world," no they were to dramatic. But he did believe in tradition. So Harry opted for "Everyone say good-bye to my worthless existence."

He watched in fascination as the blood flowed as freely down his arm as a river went downstream. Harry had gone across his wrist, even though he had heard that going down his arm would be faster, because he wanted to see if anyone would try and save him. He was giving them a chance. Not much of one, but better than nothing.

Dots started clouding his vision. Good thing I sent those letters. I don't think anyone would notice the Savior of the wizarding world is dead until the beginning of school. And September is so far away. Who knows, maybe I'll even get a sympathizer or two. He thought with a laugh. No one would understand enough to sympathize with him. They would all be outraged that he had killed himself. He'd probably go down in the history books as The Boy Who Lived To Let Everyone Down. He chuckled a little at that. Wouldn't that just be ironic? The one fated to save them gives them up on a silver platter for the Dark Lord. He smiled. But once again sobered as he remembered what and who he had done this for. Oh no, he hadn't done this just for himself. No he did this to save any loved ones he had left. Remus, Neville, Luna maybe. The rest were dead. Because of him. Tears gathered in the corners of his eyes as he thought of the ones lost. But he was going to see them soon. So soon. It seemed no one did care. If they did they would have been here by now. He could thoroughly feel all of his body heat fleeing. Slowly but surely.

Suddenly he heard something downstairs, his aunt and uncle throwing a fit because his kind were in the house.

Bam!

Apparently someone did come to save him because they just burst through the door that Harry had personally and painstakingly took the time to put a privacy charm on, with wandless magic of course. It really is a shame they're too late. Whoever they are they obviously wanted to try and save me. He decided that with his dying breath he would show his gratitude, "Thank you, but you're too late."Harry's last thought was The pains gone. I think I like dying.

A/N: Well there you go. How'd you like it? Leave a review please if you did like it. If not well just say you didn't.

Harry: Why am I always the suicidal freak?

Me: You're not a freak. And come on! You think it's your fault you parents, almost friend, and godfather are dead. And the only people in the world that might give a shit are Severus Snape and Draco Malfoy. Face it your life sucks.

Harry: *sigh* you have a point.

Me: I always do.

Until next time…