Welcome to my first AU! Which just happens to be a crossover, because why not :) This story was suggested by my amazing friend a nd proofreader, who I talk about in basically every story XD Seriously, though, she's amazing, and the prompt for a SOUE/Death Note crossover was just to good to ignore.

Just one thing before we start: I have not read the books in their entirety. I'm a huge bookworm, but I've never actually read the whole SOUE, meaning that all the information I use for this story will be taken from either the Netflix show (because I heard that the movie was inaccurate) or the Lemony Snicket Wiki. So please do tell me if I get anything wrong. However, I will also be altering some aspects of the story and timelines, so make sure to check if I've mentioned making changes before going to the reviews.

What makes someone a genius? Is it the extraordinary intellect? A wealth of awe-inspiring logic? Can someone become a genius? And if so, how? Do they work themselves to the bone until they're sweaty and tired? Or do they study, until their minds are numb, and they've finally grasped that fleeting, flickering something? Or perhaps geniuses cannot be made; perhaps they are simply born. Perhaps they are born with that ultimate something, the it that allows them to grasp concepts like straws, and flow smoothly between talents.

Well, whatever it was, L certainly had it.

Maybe too much of it, he often found himself thinking as he sifted through the endless wonderings of the world. He had often been called the holder of the world's greatest mind and that, to some extent, may well have been true. But one drag that came with his terrifying genius was that he simply couldn't bring himself to care. The world spun with thoughts of trivial, meaningless things that most people found fascinating. To L, however, they were naught but foolish. Conspiracies? Debunked with simple logic. Legends? Both scientifically and literally impossible. Aliens? Real, obviously. Criss Angel's career?

Well, that last one was still something of a mystery even to him. . .

But, aside from the (somehow) persisting career or an incompetent magician, the rest of the world was a dull wasteland to him. Day in, day out, he solved cases. The names and faces changed, but the circumstances never did. The closest thing he ever got to an interesting day was when a serial killer, psychopath, or other type of megalomaniac decided that they wanted to try some new way of disemboweling a child or try a different method in stopping the heart of a victim.

Suffice it to say that there was very little that could interest L – for longer than a few minutes, anyways. However, when something did catch his eye, it was guaranteed to be quite extraordinary. . . or just weird.

He wasn't quite sure which category this case fell into. He leaned forwards, nose barely an inch from the screen of his laptop, running a finger over his lip. "Well, now," he murmured to himself, a grin spreading across his face. "Isn't this interesting?"

xxx

L squatted in one of the many seats on his great (and empty) private jet, leaning back against the seatback. His head was turned towards the window, and he watched as the plane dipped down, descending towards the ground. They passed through the clouds, and a soft, rueful smile appeared on L's face as he saw the rolling hills, gentle green pastures, and swaying wooded forests. Such a lovely image, he thought, finding himself uncharacteristically sentimental. Could such a horrible story truly take place in such a beautiful setting? He pulled his legs closer, putting his arms on his knees and tucking his chin on top of them. He knew the answer.

Yes.

It always could.

A ding resonated throughout the hollow cabin, and Watari's voice sounded through the speakers. "We shall make our landing in about two minutes," he informed him. "I've had M bring a car to the airstrip; we should be at the hotel in about two hours."

L nodded quietly to himself, fully aware that Watari couldn't see him. "Is M in America?" he asked, raising his voice over the roar of the engines so the transmitters could catch the words.

"Yes."

"His counterpart?"

"I'm assuming so. N is currently in Canada, as well; a six-hour flight from here."

"That's good," L remarked, turning his head back to the window as the plane neared the ground. "I'm going to need some help on the outside for this case, and, judging from the current state of affairs, I'm willing to wager that the authorities here are rather incompetent."

"I shall call in N, then." Watari declared, and there was a crackle as the speakers turned off. L closed his eyes, feeling his stomach drop as they landed on the private airstrip, coasting along the runway. He held the case file in his hand, pitiful and weak compared to any other case he had ever taken on. The entire file was comprised of newspaper clippings, photographs, some bank files, and what looked like pieces of a children's notebook, none of which made remotely any sense.

He grinned as the plane came to a stop. This case was not only interesting: it was a challenge. And he liked a challenge. I'm going to solve this case, no matter what, he decided. I've never failed at a task, and I'm not going to stop now, just because I've got next to nothing to work with. He stood up and walked down the aisle.

I'm going to find you, Baudelaires.