A Kind of Murder

-dutchtulips-


Every thought I had that day,
Every feeling and every word I said
Was murder.

It really was, because -

When I tried to protect you,
I harmed you.
When I turned down your love,
I deceived you.
And when I walked away from you,
I killed you.

I dashed your dreams,
I ruined your hopes,
I made your beautiful face
Contort in pain and tears.

You were so full of hope,
So full of love,
And I snuffed that all out
In a single heartbeat.

All this time I thought
It was right;
Maybe if I turned you away,
You wouldn't have to be hurt somehow.

But who was I fooling?
You have been "hurt somehow"

By me

I purposely deceived you
I purposely saddened you
And made you feel the feeling
That no human being deserves to feel.

That isn't the right thing.
The right thing is not to shun you,
The person I love with my whole life,
Making you bitter and broken.

I didn't know I felt this way
Until today,
That really I 'have' wronged.
That to shatter your heart to pieces
Will never by the grace of God be
The "right" thing.

I can't live like this any longer.
I can't deceive you anymore.

I have to stop making my words
Be murder

I have to stop making my words
Be suicide