THE DIRECT APPROACH
by ardavenport
****** WELCOME TO THE LI'YOOSCHM ******
------ The Galaxy's most Discreet Luxury Accommodations ------
PLEASE DECLARE YOUR STATUS AND PRIVILEGE LEVEL (penalties do apply for false representation)
*** Golden Circle Member
*** Guest, Golden Circle Member (member must insert ident card)
*** New Applicant, Golden Circle Member (please be prepared to present credentials and current Golden Circle member recommendation)
*** Crystal Peak Member
*** ...........
Obi-Wan Kenobi frowned down at the list. He had only been a Jedi Padawan for a few years, but he was sure that this was not normal -- if the Li'Yooschm was such a luxurious resort why would its patrons be required to declare themselves with such a menu? Shouldn't they have a droid greeter waiting? Wasn't that what the Li'Yooschm was famous for from its advertising on the Core Worlds? Superbly programmed service in the finest accommodations in the galaxy on a secluded moon dedicated to your pleasure and restoration?
Reading down the long, glowing list on the wall, Obi-Wan wondered which option applied to them.
His eyes stopped on a very short and unexpected option near the bottom between "Promotional Prize Winner (please insert reward card here)" and "Near Relative of Employee (must have been pre-approved with relevant department head)."
*** Jedi
Obi-Wan stared at the word. It was lettered in pink with a bright orange button next to it, quite unlike the other gold, silver, blue and rainbow crystal items on the menu.
An arm came around his shoulder, the first finger of the hand extended, and pressed the orange button.
A bell rang.
Bing - bing - bing - bing - bing!
Obi-Wan looked up at his Master, Qui-Gon Jinn, doubtfully.
"Should we announce ourselves like this? If Gatriv is truly in distress won't we just be alerting potential enemies to our presence?"
Qui-Gon straightened, his face irritatingly serene under the hood of his dark brown robe and folded his arms into the sleeves.
"Sometimes the direct approach is best, my young Padawan. We shall wait here."
Feeling uneasy, Obi-Wan imitated his Master's posture, tucking his hands into his own opposing sleeves.
~ ~ ~ Dee-dee-dee. DEE-DEE. Doop-dee-doop, doop-dee-doop-DOOP dee. ~ ~ ~
Relentlessly pleasant music played in the spacious, sunny anteroom of deeply pink polished marble floors and columns. This was not the usual entryway for the Li'Yooschm. The little direction that they had said that this was a 'private' and 'exclusive' entry.
The metal fixtures gleamed; the perfectly pruned and positioned plants scented the pleasantly warm air, stirred by a gentle, artificial indoor breeze.
Whoom, whoom.
A heavy bronze door, decorated with a garden scene relief, slid aside. A polished chrome and pale blue droid came out.
It was generically humanoid-shaped. Legs, arms with six digits on its hands. Sturdy torso with a data screen on its chest. Ovoid head with the narrower seated on its neck. Two round eye sensors, audio screens on the sides and a vocalizer hole under the eyes.
"Greetings fellow sentients. I am Zee-Jay-Gah-Four. We hope you will have a pleasant stay with us. And while we welcome your patronage I must inquire around your status ---"
"We are Jedi," Qui-Gon interrupted.
The droid clicked its version of surprise. It swiveled its head, eye sensors scanning back and forth between them. Unreadable text flashed on its screen before going blank again.
"Excuse me, Sirs. I must inform my superior. Please accept our hospitality while you wait."
The droid first swiveled head then body around and swiftly exited. As it went through the door another, similar droid entered. It was more silvery chrome in the body with less painted pale blue and no chest screen. It carried a tray of refreshments.
"Hmmm." Qui-Gon helped himself to a cup of tea and a flat, pale yellow biscuit.
~ ~ ~ Dee-dee-dee. DEE-DEE. Doop-dee-doop, doop-dee-doop-DOOP dee. ~ ~ ~
Obi-Wan indecisively looked from his calm Master to the plate of treats. They smelled very good.
"Master, did Knight Gatriv not send an emergency beacon to the Temple that we have been sent to answer?"
Qui-Gon finished chewing and swallowed.
"Yes, it was." He took another sip of tea from the delicate light blue cup. "You should try one." His little finger pointed at the array of biscuits.
The shiny chrome droid turned, holding the tray up right in front of Obi-Wan. He took two square biscuits. They were very good. Sweet, but not too sweet. One nutty, the other fruity with a hint of sourness.
The first droid returned with another. It had more pale blue on its body along with some white stripes on its arms. Both had yellow and blue text flashing and vanishing on their chest screens. The droid with the tray stepped back out of their way.
"Welcome, Sirs," the newcomer addressed them, "to the Li'Yooschm. I am droid overseer Zee-Jay-Twelve. Before entry I must ask for confirmation of your identities. I'm sure that persons of your advanced status understand the need."
"Of course." Qui-Gon took out his ident card. Obi-Wan silently followed his Master's lead. The cards went into slots next to the senior droid's screen.
White stars raced across the screen which flashed bright blue and green. The screen went dark and the cards popped out. Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan took them and tucked them back into their belt pouches.
The Zee-Jay overseer's white eye sensors blinked.
"I do apologize for this delay, esteemed Sirs. But I must retreat to receive further instructions from my superiors. I regret that I am not programmed to serve guests of such a high status as yourselves." It backed up.
"If you would, Overseer." Qui-Gon raised a hand.
The droid froze.
"Please expedite your inquiry to the highest level. Our time is limited."
"Of course, Sir."
It left, the bronze door closing behind it.
The chrome droid with the tray advanced again, but both Jedi waved it back to wait with the droid that had first greeted them by an imposing pink column and a big plant with long, waxy yellow leaves with blue spots.
~ ~ ~ Dee-dee-dee. DEE-DEE. Doop-dee-doop, doop-dee-doop-DOOP dee. ~ ~ ~
Obi-Wan looked up at the patterned doomed ceiling of the entryway. He looked at the door. He stretched his legs in place. He looked back to the hangar where they had first entered. Then back to the bronze door.
Next to him, his Master remained still, motionless. arms folded before him. Obi-Wan suppressed his impatient motions. But inside, he wondered about the priority message they had received from the Jedi Temple. What about the emergency signal from Knight Gatriv? If there was ever a time for Jedi to hurry wasn't this one of them?
Qui-Gon remained a dark brown column of calm beside him.
~ ~ ~ Dee-dee-dee. DEE-DEE. Doop-dee-doop, doop-dee-doop-DOOP dee. ~ ~ ~
What did his Master know?
They had been returning to the Temple on Coruscant when Obi-Wan had answered the com. Yoda himself had told them about the emergecny beacon. Then he had requested a rare text com with Qui-Gon who had complied before setting the navi-comp for their destination. Obi-Wan had waited for an explanation that didn't come. His inquiry was rebuffed as soon as he opened his mouth.
~ ~ ~ Dee-dee-dee. DEE-DEE. Doop-dee-doop, doop-dee-doop-DOOP dee. ~ ~ ~
Having exhausted his possibilities for fidgeting and knowing that Qui-Gon would say nothing about their purpose, Obi-Wan quieted body and mind, standing in an imitation of his Master's pose.
When in doubt, there was always the Force.
There was . . . . . . something . . . . not quite imminent . . . . . probably nearby.
Obi-Wan opened one eye and peeked under the hood of his robe at a still motionless Qui-Gon.
Did Knights and Jedi Masters get anything better than non-localized queasiness? Maybe a flashing vision of exactly what peril Knight Gatriv faced? And possibly direction about what to do abut it?
Probably not. Probably.
The bronze door slid open again.
Both Jedi turned to the line of droids that filed in.
The first one, similar to the l1ast Tee-Jay unit with a golden, gleaming body with metallic blue accents and rank insignia, stopped before them. The rank designations in the line descended in importance down to the lowest on the droid that had gone to consult its superiors.
"Greetings, Master Jedi. I am Zee-Five-Six-Tah. Welcome to the Li'Yooschm. How may we be of service?"
"We have come to meet someone staying at your establishment."
"Are you expected?"
"Yes."
"What is the name of the patron you are meeting?"
"Kras Tobroom."
The droid's head jerked quickly, side-to-side, its eye sensors blinking. Screens of text flashed on and off on its screen.
"I'm sorry, Sir. Kras Tobroom is unavailable - - -"
Then she must be made available."
Eye sensors blinked again. Obi-Wan had never heard the name 'Kras Tobroom' before.
"I'm sorry, Sir - - -"
"I'm sure you are," Qui-Gon interrupted. "However, we have come a long way to meet her. I would have expected more respect for our status. I regret to see that the quality of service of this establishment is not as high as I have been told."
The droid's head jerked, clicking. A line of red lights flashed under its screen.
"My deepest apologies, Sir. Unfortunately a Zee-Jay-Oh-Oh model was programmed with details of the correct protocol for Jedi. Regrettably, that unit was put out of service last year and we are only discovering now that its memory was not properly preserved. We deeply regret - - -"
"Then no one here is aware of the correct protocol and privileges of the Jedi?" Qui-Gon said with a touch of affront in his voice.
"Of course not, Sir! We are well informed of and fully respect the exceptional status of the Jedi Order in the Galactic Republic! Your service and renown alone are - - - "
"Apparently not sufficient for you to oblige us in our one simple request." Qui-Gon shook his head and folded his arms before him, disappointed. Obi-Wan watched the now insecure senior service droid's head quiver with a new whirring sound. Apparently the possibility of an unsatisfied, high -ranking customer was too much for it.
"Of course. . . . . we can take you to where Kras Tobroom is and make inquiries. . . ."
"Well," Qui-Gon sighed, "I suppose that might be sufficient. If you would personally escort us."
"Of course, Sir! Nothing less would do!"
Obi-Wan saw the collective relief replace the nervous posture of the line of droids behind their senior overseer.
The head droid led them past the line though the bronze door.
They entered a long hall with a polished mirrored floor and skylights, bright blue sky above. After passing through a large archway at the end, they descended stairs to a waiting open transport.
It took off immediately, as soon as they seated themselves in back, Zee-Five-Six-Tah and the droid driver in front. They soared over gardens and majestic villas, well-tended forests and picturesque plains of tall grasses and colorful herd animals. There was a beautiful blue lake with a scatter of rocky islands in the distance.
They zoomed toward the largest villa, a castle of orange stone with many sculpted turrets and balconies. Their transport dove into a covered hangar. The driver expertly parked in an open space away from a line of similar vehicles. Qui-Gon leaned forward and Obi-Wan tensed. There was something. . . .
A line of sentry droids pointed their eye sensors at them. There was more formidable than the servitors with heavy black, armored upper bodies. But Zee-Five-Six-Tah's rank seemed to mean something to them. Their blaster rifles remained holstered as their group walked past them out of the hangar.
They arrived at a bank of lifts. The senior droid overseer tapped a code on a keypad. A lift door opened and it with the two hooded, robed Jedi entered.
"If you would be so kind, Master Jedi, to allow me to enter first and discreetly allow me to announce your presence to Kras Tobroom so that she may quietly excuse herself to meet you?"
"Of course," Qui-Gon replied politely. The droid didn't notice him brushing back the side of his robe away from the lightsaber clipped to his belt. Obi-Wan, standing behind and between them, watched the level indicator decrease as the descended.
The lift slowed. Stopped. The doors opened and they all stepped out.
"Halt! Surrender your weapons!" a buzzing, harsh monotone ordered. Six armored sentry droids - larger models than those in the hangar - drew their weapons as the formed a semi-circle, blocking the way to an enormous glossy black door along with any escape down the dark gray halls on either side of them.
Zee-Five-Six-Tah threw up its hands. "No, please! This must be a mistake! I am authorized - - "
Qui-Gon's lightsaber snapped on, bright green.
Obi-Wan's blue blade came on immediately after. Doubt and impatience vanished for the young Jedi. The moment had come and he followed his Master's lead and the impulses of where to move from the Force.
The two Jedi whirled in opposite directions, cutting down the sentries before they could aim their blasters. One, two, three, on both sides.
They met at the glossy black doors. Qui-Gon pointed at the control panel next to it.
"What? What? What?" Zee-Five-Six-Tah, no longer noticed by either Jedi or the dismembered sentries on the black floor, dithered behind them.
The door hissed open, parting from the center.
Hood flying back off his long hair, Qui-Gon leapt forward into the black-paneled room, between two shocked people seated at a circular table that the Jedi Master landed on.
His green saber flashed, humming loudly, metal squealing as he cut down another sentry droid.
Obi-Wan's blue blade deflected two bright red energy bursts that exploded on the upper walls before Qui-Gon sliced through the second droid, the cut parts glowing in the lightsaber's wake as it they clattered down on the tabletop. Wisps of burnt metal and plastoids rose from the wreckage.
On the speaker's platform in the center of the conference table a Sorcash in a gray and dark purple suit ducked her narrow, white-crested head, holding up her clawed hands as if to push back the Jedi Master who had just cut down the droids at her side.
"There! There!" Someone shouted from the shadowed seats around the table. "There are your Jedi you suspicious, mal-adjusted tooph-fah!"
Others seated around the table drew back from the destruction with squawks and outbursts of shock and outrage. Qui-Gon scanned the room, turning around in a slow circle, his saber still activated, the glow from it casting a green glow on the cowering Sorcash.
"Pfffoot-hoom tkkk-tkk shoosh kck-kck ffftaaawm!!" A Mooshrk lumbered up from her chair and headed for the door, circling wide around Obi-Wan to the exit.
"I'm getting out of here, too! I don't have any business with any of you. I'm only here by mistake!" An elderly Calamari in a flowing white robe made for the door as well.
The exodus practically exploded throughout the room. Some chairs flipped back onto the floor amidst the hasty rush and declarations of innocence, though Obi-Wan noticed that none of them said exactly what they might have done wrong other than possibly unwisely associating the Sorcash in the center of everything.
One short Lortarn passed by a little closer than the others with her pale green eyes furious, her dark antennae twitching. Her short silvery skirt clung to her round hips, the multi-green shaded top fluffed around her shoulders as she moved, going to the row of lifts with the others.
Obi-Wan's eyes went to Qui-Gon whose saber remained pointed in the general direction of the Sorcash on the speaker's platform. His Master could not possibly missed her but Obi-Wan saw no visible sign that Qui-Gon had recognized the Lortarn as Knight Gatriv.
The Jedi and the Sorcash remained motionless while the room emptied. It seemed to be some kind of secure, windowless conference room with thick walls and data terminals at each seat at the table.
Qui-Gon's saber finally hissed off, the deadly green glow vanishing. Obi-Wan deactivated his own saber and reattached it to his belt.
The one remaining conferee glared as Qui-Gon inclined his head to her and then backed up to the walkway leading off the speaker's platform. He descended the stairs leading off the edge of the table down to the floor. Confused, Obi-Wan followed him out.
"My apologies for the inconvenience." Qui-Gon did not even pause as he passed Zee-Five-Six-Tah.
"Sir?" The senior droid overseer swiveled its head, random blocks of text and squiggly lines flashing on its chest screen before it turned to follow them. They all entered a lift when one finally arrived.
Zee-Five-Six-Tah's screen finally calmed down, but the droid remained jittery, twitching its eye sensors toward them, their light sabers and then away.
When they exited the lift, Qui-Gon bowed to the machine.
"Thank-you for your service. It was exemplary. My report on our visit will be most favorable."
Zee-Five-Six-Tah drew back fearfully before inclining its shiny gold head.
"We are happy to serve," it replied, but it's vocalization wavered.
"Thank-you, but we shall see ourselves out. Qui-Gon turned and strode away.
Obi-Wan hastily caught up, hoping for some explanation, but Qui-Gon said nothing other than to give the transport driver instructions to return as the climbed into their seats again.
"Master?" he finally started.
His bearded Master held up a silencing finger and inclined it forward toward the droid driver. Nothing would be said until they were alone, back at the ship.
Obi-Wan watched the magnificent scenery pass by on the trip back. And he kept his silence as they passed the other droids in the entryway on their way back to the ship.
When the hatch opened, Kras Tobroom, a.k.a. Jedi Knight Gatriv, stood there waiting for them. Her pale yellow arms folded, her pale green eyes narrowed crossly, her antennae lowered.
"What in the depths of all the shichrems was that??" she demanded, her voice low and loud. She glared up at Qui-Gon as he passed her to go to the controls. Obi-Wan closed the hatch, and stayed back out of the center of the confrontation as much as possible in the minimal cabin of their small ship.
"Knight Gatriv, you look well. I am pleased that we arrived in time to assist you," Qui-Gon answered pleasantly. The engines started up, the deck plates subtly hummed under their boots, the lights came up.
"Assist me? You call that assistance?" she demanded, her voice outraged. "You revealed my position. You completely spoiled everything!"
"From what I could see, they had already determined that a Jedi was present and that this was why you called for assistance." He stood at his full height. She barely came up to his chest and was shorter than Obi-Wan, but she seemed little impressed by Qui-Gon's size.
"They didn't know it was me," she replied, tight-lipped.
"Then I presume you had a plan in place in case an innocent was identified as a Jedi?" Qui-Gon calmly replied. He did not seem to be impressed with her, or her outrage, eiher. "I am pleased to see that you were able to retrieve your lightsaber from wherever you concealed it and are ready to leave." He looked down at the silver, gold and black hilt that she tightly grasped in one hand.
"I could have deflected them from accusing someone else of being a Jedi," she denied stubbornly.
"Really?" Qui-Gon raised his brows skeptically. "It would appear to me that your mission was already unsalvageable."
"You made sure of that!"
Qui-Gon's expression had steadily deteriorated from calm, to impatient to annoyed, but Gatriv seemed immune to it.
"Regardless of what you think you could have saved from your mission the outcome is now settled. We shall be returning to Coruscant. Obi-Wan."
The young apprentice came forward to the pilot's seat and began the pre-flight check, carefully not looking at either glowering Jedi.
Qui-Gon took the co-pilot's seat. Gatriv pushed down the jump seat folded up against the rear bulkhead of the tiny cockpit. She plopped down on it, her saber clasped in her lap. There was no possible other place to put it in her skimpy outfit of short, silvery skirt, fluffy, frilly top with matching green feather accented shoes.
"This mission is ruined; almost a quarter year's work a complete waste of time," she grumbled.
Qui-Gon seemed prepared to ignore her complaining, but Obi-Wan felt his own irritation rising. He could accept his Master's silence about this rescue, but he felt seriously ill-used by her.
He turned the pilot's chair around.
"So, if your mission was such a waste of time, then was it really worth our time to retrieve you? Whatever your mission was."
Gatriv stared back, wide-eyed before she looked critically toward Qui-Gon.
"Is this what you teach your Padawan, Master Qui-Gon? Impudence?"
"No," Obi-Wan replied before his surprised Master could, "he has instructed me in the best use of the direct approach. Particularly for this mission."
"If it was your place, Padawan, to correct me about anything regarding this mission ---."
"And if I wished you to correct my Padawan, for any reason, Knight Gatriv, I would have said so."
Obi-Wan would not have said any more after hearing that tone from Qui-Gon, but Gatriv did not seem to know any better.
"And if I needed the Temple to send a huge brute like you to spoil all my work I would have asked for it. How did you even get in waving a lightsaber like that?"
"We did not come in, waving our lightsabers," Qui-Gon replied. "We chose the most obvious guest option presented to us when we arrived."
Gatriv puckered her face in concentration.
"Wait -- you TOLD them that you were Jedi? And they let you in?"
"Apparently, whatever conspiracy you were chasing was smaller than you thought. The droids at least were unprepared for our arrival. They took us right to you."
Gatriv, finally speechless, sat gaping at them.
Qui-Gon, turned back to the controls. "We are done here. Your mission is over, Knight Gatriv and I expect to hear nothing more from you about it until you give your report to the Council." His tone was severe and it appeared to have finally gotten through to her. But Obi-Wan saw a hint of a smile in his Master's dark blue eyes when they looked to him. "Proceed, Obi-Wan."
He activated the lifters and the momentary gravitational indecisiveness as the ship's grav field supplanted the natural pull of the planet. The ship rose quickly into the sky toward the upper atmosphere and orbit.
Both Jedi in the forward seats heard their passenger mutter to herself.
"I can't believe they did that."
## ## ## end ## ## ##
Disclaimer: This story was first posted on tf.n on 27-Nov-2009 - Star Wars and all characters from it belong to George Lucas and Lucasfilm. I'm just playing in their sandbox.