Title: A new look
Author: Oracle of Moon
Translation beta: Ferporcel (or FerPotter)
Rating: k
Note: Fanfic written originally in Portuguese for the birthday of Severus Snape. I used it to put into practice an idea I had after reading the book / watching the movie. This is my first fanfic in English, so if I made any probable mistake in your language, let me know.
Summary: After the Battle of Hogwarts, Minerva McGonagall revises her concepts about Severus Snape.
A new look
"A snake?" Minerva McGonagall interrupted "Do you want me to believe that Severus Snape, Defense Against the Dark Arts´ master and brilliant potions maker, was killed by a mere snake?"
The Boy Who Lived looked down and shook his head. A few hours might have passed since he saw his no-longer hated professor take his last breath, and although it hadn't been because of a mere snake, Harry did not object before the incisive voice of Gryffindor´s Head of House not even when she frowned and gave him a completely disbelieving look.
"And where is he now, Harry?" Minerva's eyes widened in utter despair by the mistake she'd made. She'd only just emerged from the memories of the man for whom she'd been harboring extreme hatred during all year, and now everything had changed in a matter of minutes. The entire life of Severus Snape and what he'd put himself to do sixteen years ago were still unfolding in her mind like a web of bad choices. The uttered injuries had become remorse; the resentment had given place to a painful feeling of loss.
"In the Shrieking Shack. There's nothing we can do," Harry added, seeing the disconcerting state his elderly teacher had surrendered herself to.
Minerva took some steps through the rumbles of the Great Hall and stopped in front of the path that led to the dungeons with a distant expression, as if she could glimpse ghosts of a recent past. And then, she turned to Harry and the other students who were still there recovering from the battle and looked at some of seventh-years with a determinate shine to her eyes.
"You should know that we always had a reasonable amount of antidote to venons of all kind of snakes, all produced by Professor Snape himself; so, to let something like this happen is a total and complete nonsense!"
Harry still tried in vain to argue about the time elapsed since Voldemort had left the Shrieking Shack, Nagini and a Snape marked for certain death while Professor McGonagall led him downstairs by the shoulders, with a few more totally confused students at their heels, but he gave up when they arrived in front of Snape's lab, and his stomach churned with the stinging sensation that he had a huge debt to the man who he'd seen ... and had left to die.
"Come on, I want you to search these dungeons from top to bottom. Professor Snape must have left us some of his potions." She'd also ordered a few elves to alert Poppy Pomfrey to help with the search, since the first aid to the most needed had been already provided for. To others, she'd ordered to quickly rescue Severus' body and bring it to the security of the castle, and then they would know if there was still any remote hope of saving his life."
Minerva then turned her back to the lab door and said, in a theatrical voice:
"Leave no stone standing!"
In fact, one of the students remembered that in one of his last classes, the professor had mentioned something about the the school stock of antidotes —at the time, everyone had trembled thinking said antidotes would serve to be administered to the students after torture sessions with the Death Eater teachers—and for this reason, it hadn't been difficult to find some where his private laboratory had been.
Some time later, a truly commotion of wizards, students and professors lead by Minerva McGonagall and Poppy Pomfrey invaded the improvised wing for the treatment of the wounded, where the lifeless body lay in one of the beds, drenched in its own blood. Poppy and an assistant approached with caution and started to investigate possible vital signs on wrists and neck, which by this time had a large swelling at the wounds´ site.
Minerva covered her mouth with one hand, trembling at the sight of his colleague in that state. She understood Voldemort's nefarious plan to kill, without a sign of remorse, his—up to then—most loyal servant. As Poppy was explaining, Nagini's venom had caused a complete paralysis of Severus body right after the attack and would not kill him immediately. On the contrary, the effect would drag for hours, and his vital signs would get increasingly frail and imperceptible over time, making him easily mistaken for dead if someone found him still alive.
"We have suffered too many losses, noble men and women, true heroes who were gone forever. We can't afford to lose even one more. Especially not this one." Minerva held firmly to Poppy´s arm, who was determined to administer the antidote to Severus' purple lips when she evidenced that his body still had faint vital signs, although he was completely paralyzed due to the effects of the venom.
Hogwarts´ mediwitch looked up, but she could not hold the Scottish's intense eyes.
"It will be very difficult to get a reaction; he's been that way for a long time, Minerva."
"For the love of Merlin, do what is necessary."
Someone observed his back from behind a pillar, feeling a wave of complacency for the lonely man observing the wide view provided by the balcony of the Astronomy Tower. He kept his head down and shoulders slumped, hiding the face that stamped the fatigue of all recent events.
Little time had passed since Severus Snape had left St. Mungo's with the body partially recovered after the intervention of his old teacher. He still felt aches throughout his body due to venom traces that persisted in running through his veins, but the swelling on his neck disappeared and the risk of death was gone, with much vexation. But he doubted that his mind remained intact now that he could no longer protected himself under his intimidating attitude towards the other teachers, Ministry members and—he snorted—perhaps not even before the whole of the bloody wizarding world, which was now engaged in making many different theories about his loyalty after all, after that damned article published by Skeeter.
He contemplated the irony of Fate: many of those people now considered him a hero. Severus opened a bitter smile to the landscape that stretched out beyond the Tower, wondering if they had any idea of the circumstances that had led him to become this hero. To be awarded some honorific had never been an averse idea to him; he could almost feel the sweet taste of recognition when he'd almost put his hands on Black, when he still believed that miserable man had really been the criminal who had betrayed Lily. But now it meant exposing part of himself that he'd made Albus promise he'd always keep a secret.
Severus finally lifted his head and seemed to notice the other presence in the place; a sign of how he'd been oblivious to everything around him. The ex-headmaster suddenly turned to face the person who was watching him in silence, and the glimpse of fatigue on his face gave way to the old figurehead of the evil Potions master in a matter of seconds, leaving him ready to dump acidity on whatever student who dared to be there, completely forgetting that they were in their homes, and those who were still in the castle were the most senior, as volunteers in the reforms for rebuilding the parts destroyed by the war.
But when his furious eyes rested on Minerva McGonagall´s calm ones, his voice died and the tiredness returned.
"Save your authoritarian anger for when the students return, Severus." Minerva had never had children, but facing the still pale and helpless face, she felt as if she had traveled back in time, when the wizard in front of her, who at the present time was a head and a half taller than she, was still just her student, a shy guy who always arrived first in class and sat in the back rows to be removed from the leering eyes of the colleagues. And then she felt an urge almost motherly to comfort him, one that had appeared since she had decided to help in his recovery when he was still unconscious, surge forward again.
While she had been helping Poppy, with her own hands, to hold back the heavy bruising that the expelling of the venom caused to Severus´ body, even if under strong protests from the first, she shone in the light of the new information. Now it was easy for the experienced witch to see how hard it had been to keep himself as a spy within the castle walls, always faithful to the designs of the deceased headmaster, even when everyone was against him. Albus had taken the role of his mentor and advisor, being the only one to whom he had been able to talk openly during those sixteen years and vent about his frustrations with the whole of the bold and terrible plan. Almost like a pillar of support. And then the wizard had deliberately left him forever, alone amongst the allies who despised him.
"Minerva, I hadn't noticed it was you." Visibly embarrassed, Severus united his fingers under his belly and began to nudge them slightly.
"You need to talk, Severus." Her voice sounded like an obvious point, to what he replied with a typical lift of the eyebrow.
"This is not necessary, I am perfectly in order, as you can see very well," he said while pointing to the sign where Nagini had attacked him. Even if the sentence was clearly ironic, his voice sounded different from that which he usually used with most students, as if he didn't dare to treat Minerva the same way he'd always dealt with the student body.
This fact had not passed unnoticed by Minerva, who once again recognized in the adult that young Severus: always escaping from the help where emotional issues were concerned, but always dedicated and respectful when it came to addressing the teachers, though he´d been a trouble-maker when confronted by James Potter and company; both often sent each other to the Hospital Wing.
"And I am very happy for this, Severus, although you had understood very well what I meant to say. In any case, I have not had the opportunity to thank you..."
He raised his eyebrow again.
"I thought I was the one in debt here, Minerva. For you for having saved my wonderful and gorgeous life."
"...for not attacking me when I opposed you in the Great Hall." She noticed the clear change on the wizard's expression; he looked down just like a shy pupil. "It seems to me the truth is that inside there hides a perfect gentleman."
"You are an extremely powerful witch; I would never take the risk." His voice was gentle, overflowing with sincerity.
Minerva looked deeply at the man she had lived with during those long years, feeling her cheeks blush lightly before the obvious compliment, and put a wrinkled hand over her cheek, now tinged with red, looking at him with admiration and amazement.
"I had never seen this kind side of yours!" she answered delighted with the new discovery, to what Severus responded with a slight nod. In addition to being younger, Minerva thought, he'd always demonstrated great skill with spells and would certainly be a hard opponent, but all he did in the Great Hall, when she herself had advanced in defense of Harry Potter, had been to swiftly block her blows without returning even one.
And she had called him a coward.
"You really have the good qualities of a Slytherin, rare attributes to be found. You are careful and polite with words." The new Headmistress of Hogwarts paused, mentally trying what she would say next. "And you're definitely not a coward. I'm sorry. Actually, I'm amazed to think that you have an instinct of courage and bravery of a typical Gryffindor."
The transformation Severus' face suffered was even more remarkable, and he came to look at his old teacher as if he didn't recognize her. Besides, she hadn't been the first to tell him those things, he thought, feeling his stomach churn. Minerva tried hard to stifle a laugh and continued,
"I was your teacher, and every good teacher is a good observer, as you know well." She folded her hands just below her chest. "That's why I was extremely shocked when all that happened; it took me a long time to accept that the suspicious of the boys seemed to have basis in facts. Then, we didn't believe you had been able of coming back shortly after all... Well, you felt it yourself."
A muscle of Severus´ mouth trembled, but his expression had returned to the usual neutrality.
"Of course..." he muttered as if speaking only to himself, and then he returned to speak normally, "But now you came here to praise the noble attributes of a supposed wanna-be Gryffindor... who had become who she hated the most." Severus did not hide the bitter and ironic touch of his pasted judgments.
"Ah, yes, Miss Evans... Potter," Minerva commented sadly. "As I said, I had always been a good observer, and I noticed your eyes on young Evans during my classes."
Severus stared fixedly into his former teacher's eyes for a few seconds and quickly turned away, leaning on the wall with his arms crossed under his chest, visibly embarrassed by letting it scape a mention of Lily; he dared not comment too much about this, not even with Albus himself.
Minerva approached, put a hand on Severus' shoulder, and spoke almost in a whisper,
"Dumbledore himself made terrible mistakes in his past, but what we took with us in memory was what he did to correct them. About you, Severus Snape, I believe I have known Lily´s features enough to dare to say that she not only would forgive you, but she would also appreciate very much what you've been doing for her son."
Severus snorted and averted his eyes, determined to dodge Minerva and the memories of his past.
"Oh, please, it is not possible that a man this size, who walks through the castle scaring all students, is afraid of having his best brought to light," Minerva replied, looking him in an authoritarian manner and raising a finger. "I believe you've already learned the lesson, Severus, do not deny the second chance life has offered you."
The experienced witch made to turn toward the stairs, but her eyes searched the black of Severus' again to say something else before disappearing downstairs.
"Dumbledore might no longer be present, but I wanted you to know that, if you need, there's still someone you can talk to, my boy," she said, with a mild countenance. "Now, come. Everything is almost ready and no one should miss his own award ceremony."