The following does not reflect the views or opinions of Marvel or the author known as 'Kinetically Charmed'. But it probably should. I mean... I'm a smart cookie. No one seems to think I am, and that like, totally irks me...

Entry number one:

Things that Irk me.

Okay, so like, I'm sitting here... bored out of my mind, just randomly thinking of things that irk me. Firstly, the word irk. I know, right?! What does that even mean? Is it in the dictionary? Whatever.

To get to my point, the main thing that bugs me, is when people think I'm a moron without even getting to know me. It's like... y'know... y'know how they say not to judge a book by it's cover (which I totally do all the time, and that saying is another thing that totally irks me but it gets the point across, so shut up.) well, I'm like, the worlds greatest novel, and I have a really ditzy looking cover. It'd be like, pink... and baby blue. Probably have some like, flowers on it or something. Maybe a few cats, because while I'm not like a crazy cat lady, my code name is Shadowcat for some reason. (Who came up with that nickname anyways?!) I like lasagna too, so maybe a picture of Garfield, but then I bet people would get confused and pick up my book thinking they're getting Garfield... so nevermind with that.

What was I saying?

Right, no ok. So I have a pretty, possibly shallow looking cover. And so people just assume that this is what is on the inside too. But it's totally not! They don't even bother to flip the book over and read the description on the back! (I have no idea how that works into the annalogy, I just thought of it and it made me laugh.) But seriously. I'm really smart! I may not be as sharp as a whip, but I'm... smart!

Ugh, whatever. Okay. So that's the first (second if you count the irk thing) thing that irks me.

Another thing that bugs the crap outta me is people who use abbrv. instead of just typ. out the wrd. Like... C U later! Actually they'd probably use l8er (Oh my gosh I totally just got that!) Or when they're texting, and they mention the word text. But to "save time" they drop the "e" and say "txt". Like they're so important that they don't have enough TIME to deal with the letter "e". It's one extra letter people, and it makes you look like less of an ass.

Hmmm let's see... I hate people trying to shove the whole "eat healthy" thing down my throat like if I don't eat healthy I'll... die or stuff. I'm going to die anyways guys, let me eat my doughnut in peace. (But not the kind with jam in it. I also hate stuff with jam in it. You think you're eating one thing, and then you hit the middle and SHOCK... grossness...) And so He's all like, "let's all start eating healthy around here guys!" with his stupid red sunglasses and his dumb... face... and then who does he get to cook the meals? Jean! (You thought I'd say me. No, not me. Jean.) JEAN. If the crap that Jean cooks is considered healthy food, I swear I'll eat my shoe before I'd ever eat healthy. The woman managed to burn minute rice. MINUTE RICE. It's like, the easiest thing in the history of the planet to make! And then he wants us to eat it and act like it's good so we don't hurt her feelings... and the whole time I'm thinking that if he would have just let us eat Kraft Dinner like we all wanted to, no one's feelings would be hurt.

Guys who don't call back when they said they would? Bugs me. Of course... I mean, I am a woman after all. If you don't want to see me again, then don't say, I'll call you sometime. Just be like, honest. Sure, I might get mad. I might stalk you for a few days... figure out you schedule and follow you around to familiarize myself with it... I might drop in unexpectedly when you're in the middle of a date and tell you I'm pregnant, or that you gave me some weird STD that will certainly end all hope of a sexual relationship with this date you have... I might even smash the hell out of your prized jeep, maybe take that stupid vest you wear all the time and NOT wash it to the specified directions and hope that it shrinks, cut your stupid mullet off while you're sleeping, set your bed on fire...
But don't you think I deserve honesty? I mean, chances are, I'd end up doing all that stuff to you anyways, unless we ended up getting married and having lots of babies.

People who hate Twilight. Don't get me started. (I bet you hate it cuz you judged the book by it's cover, which brings me back to number one.) (No, but the cover really is stupid. What does an apple have to do with Twilight OR vampiers? Nothing.) (Oh, and if you refer to them as "vamps." that's annoying too. You're not important enough to drop half of the word off to your liking. It's just not working for me.)

Last but not least, people who say they're "random". Like that's describing themselves, in one word. "Random". Really? You're really so random and freakish and totally insane that you have to tell people how RANDOM you are on a regular basis!? Wow! You really are random! I want to be your friend now! NOT. haha... that was kind of mean, I'm sorry random people. Not like, random people, but people who are random. I wouldn't just like, go around apologizing to random people. That would be random. I've said the word so many times now that it doesn't make sense anymore.

Oh no wait, one more. I hate people who carry animals around with them in their purse. Gross.

That's all folks! Not like... ALL all... I'll write more, just not like, now. I have stuff to do you know. So if you liked it, why not review?! Maybe even like, oh I don't know... set a story alert? That would be like totally rad.

Tootles!

Kitty