Some light, plotless(albeit short) humor for you to enjoy, I suppose. I wrote it awhile back, but I felt like posting because I'm in one of those moods (aka bored). It may or may not be a one-shot; time will tell.
Disclaimer: Don't even try to sue me. I don't own House. I wish I did, but alas…
My first House fic! Enjoy.
She-Devils and Toy Cars
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Splunk! A toy car had flown across the room and nose-dived perfectly into James Wilson's coffee mug.
Wilson looked up from behind his newspaper, clearly irritated.
"Don't you have people to save? You know, a job to do?"
"No, not really." House took another toy car from his pocket and held it high over his head, adjusting his aim to perfection. Wilson scowled from behind his newspaper. It wasn't a gesture anyone could see, but House sure knew it was there.
That was the entire point, of course.
Wilson tried again, "You have your own office, you know. You could get some great practice in there."
House smirked, "No," he said, "Your office has optimal conditions for…whatever this is." He snapped his wrist forward, and the tiny car sailed towards the mug. It hit the desk instead when Wilson pulled his cup to safety.
"Oh, come on! The coffee's already dirty!"
Wilson failed to follow House's logic and pulled it even closer to himself, as if protecting it from further harm. He stared dubiously at the older man, "You don't have any cases?"
House shook his head. He produced yet another toy car from his pocket, and, eying Wilson's mug, began to roll it around in his hands. If he were to throw it hard enough, he could easily stain that overly pristine shirt of Wilson's.
And if he missed and hit the cup instead…
Somewhat unsettled by the rather evil looking grin on House's face, Wilson continued, "Nothing?" House nodded, not really listening. If he aimed just right…Wilson slapped his paper down on the desk, "You're unbelievable."
House looked at him and shrugged, nonchalant, "A week off clinic duty, that was the bet."
"I don't know why she even makes an effort. She knows you always win." Wilson's eyebrows furrowed together, "Why are you here, anyway?"
"Spending quality time with a friend?" House said innocently.
"Try again," Wilson said, "Why'd you bother to come in today?"
House pulled a face, as if the idea itself was stupid, "Well, I'm still getting paid."
"I don't see how," Wilson mumbled to himself, and then louder he said, "Cuddy is bound to track you down to make you do something."
Just then, the door clicked open. Wilson conveniently disappeared behind his paper again.
"Speak of the devil!" House exclaimed.
"House," she said, ignoring his remark, "if you're going to sit on your ass, you might as well do that paperwork I needed last Tuesday. Honestly."
Housed crossed his fingers in her direction and made a loud hissing sound.
"Just do it," she said, "and stop stealing toys from the cancer kids. It's just mean." And then she was gone, flowered skirt trailing obediently behind her.
"Wait," Wilson said, peeking up over his paper, "My cancer kids? House!"
The older man had gotten up, and, limping a speed a bit faster than a man should be able to limp, reached the door.
"Gotta go," he exclaimed, "the she-devil commandith."
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I know it's short, and it may or may not be remotely funny, but…well I don't really care.
Tell me what you think please! And also, should I try to continue it? Or should I leave it as it is?
Thanks! ~riais