Title: Written in Stone
Author: Tally/Live2TiVo/Musical_Junkie
Pairing: Implied Drake/Josh
Word Count: 1,043 without this chart.
Rating: K+/PG
Summary: All of the other males in Drake's life were erasable, but Josh, well, Josh was written in stone.
Disclaimer:I don't own them. I would say that if I did the show would be even more slashy, but Dan does a pretty good job at satisfying us fangirls.
Drake really only knows four things about Gavin. One, he works with Josh. Two, he looks the love child of a caveman from the Girlco commercials and Billy Ray Cyrus—the "Achy Breaky Heart" years. Three, he has a highly disturbing obsession with Drake's mom, which is not cool. And, four… um… maybe he only knows three things about Gavin. Not that he matters all that much—Gavin is in the background of Drake's life.
Even so, Josh often has stories involving Gavin, which Drake usually tunes out.
"Drake, you wouldn't believe what Gavin got stuck in the slushie machine today!"
"What?," Drake replies, hoping that, for once, Josh will simply tell him what Gavin stuck in the Slushie machine.
"Well, I was scooping out some popcorn…" And off he goes. Knowing that it'll be a good five to ten minutes before Josh stops talking, Drake goes over the chord progression in the bridge of his latest song. Em, F, G, C. Em, F, G, C.
*
Drake doesn't like to think about his father. Drake and Megan lived with their mom full-time for a reason, and that's all he ever liked to say about it. Josh was the only one to whom he ever said anything more about his father. But, even then, he and Josh had more important things to talk about. Because, Drake doesn't like to make his father important—it's more than he deserves.
Whenever Josh presses him for more information, the conversation seems to go in the same way.
"Drake, why don't you ever talk about your dad?"
"You mean 'Spermy'?"
"Come on, Drake. He's your father. I love my dad."
"That's because your dad isn't an asshole. Wanna play Ping-Pong?"
Josh usually drops the subject after that.
*
Drake doesn't know how Crazy Steve manages in the real world. Although, it's not like screaming at random intervals and carrying a measuring tape to see how long his corndogs are is exactly managing, is it? It's actually kind of, for lack of a better phrase, crazy. And what's with the vest? Crazy Steve has serious issues. At least Drake doesn't have to work with him like Josh does.
"Drake, are you listening to me?"
"Uh…maybe."
"I was telling you about something Crazy Steve did today. Did you hear a word of what I just told you?"
"Yeah, totally. Crazy Steve did…something crazy."
Josh rolls his eyes. He knew Drake wasn't listening. Drake thinks he's good at tuning people out without anyone noticing, but he always moves his hand like he's playing guitar chords.
"As, I was saying…" Em, G, F, C. No, Em, F, G, C.
"…it took twenty minutes of 'She'll be Comin' Round the Mountain' to calm him down."
*
Drake is still on the fence in terms of Walter. He makes his mom happy and he's much better than Drake's real father, but still, he's a weatherman. Of course, Walter is the reason that Josh is in Drake's life, and that gets Walter some major bonus points in Drake's book. Even if he is a weatherman.
"Drake, did you watch the news today?"
"No. I was watching Celebrities on a Bridge. Why?"
"One of the lead anchors was out sick, and my dad got to fill in for him!"
"That's nice."
"Nice? That's great. Bruce Winchill never gets to step in for the anchors. His station uses the sports guy when one of the anchors isn't there."
Drake is amused with how excited Josh is about his dad sticking it to his rival. He's happy for Walter, sure, but it would be nicer if Walter managed to get the forecast right a little more often. Drake is getting tired of people blaming him for predicting sunshine before a torrential downpour. It's not like Drake's the one waving his arms in front of a green screen.
*
Drake puts Craig and Eric in the same category as Gavin and Crazy Steve—people Drake would have to know, or at least deal with on a regular basis, if it wasn't for Josh. Sure, he'd probably see Craig and Eric at school, but he wouldn't have to have them in his house. And, he definitely wouldn't care which one was Eric and which one was Craig. Okay, so maybe he doesn't actually care as it is, but he would care less if it wasn't for Josh.
"Drake, is it okay if Craig and Eric come over after school today?"
"I don't care. Just make sure they don't touch my stuff. I don't want them to get geek on my guitars."
Drake knows that Josh doesn't like it when he makes jokes about Craig and Eric being geeks, but he really doesn't care. When he says them around Craig and Eric, they think he's being "friendly" or something, and they get all geeky excited about it.
"Awesome, because we have this experiment that we're working on involving…"
Anytime Josh says the word "experiment," Drake knows he isn't going to understand whatever he says next. "Unless it's how to make broccoli taste like chocolate, I don't want to know."
*
Drake can't imagine life without Josh. Josh is his best friend, the bane of his existence, and his brother all wrapped up into one. If Drake had to choose one person to be stranded on a deserted island with for the rest of his life—it would be Josh. Josh is his everything. Life without Josh would be unbearable. One week without Josh had nearly driven him insane. And that was before they had become…what they were now—more that friends, nay, more than brothers (actually, make that more than step-brothers, as that particular distinction was of increasing importance these days.)
"Drake, would you please stop doing that? I'm trying to study."
"You've been studying for hours, and I'm bored."
"Watch Celebrities in a Dumpster or something."
"But, Joshie, I don't want to watch Celebrities in a Dumpster, I want to lick your earlobe."
"Later. I'm studying."
"Please."
"No."
Drake resumes the licking, and Josh's resistance weakens. "Let me finish this page first."
"Read fast."
Yes, life without Josh would be unlivable. All of the other males in Drake's life were erasable, but Josh, well, Josh was written in stone.
Remember, if you have time to read, you have time to review!