DISCLAIMER: hehehehehehe, I am so touched that u need a disclaimer to tell you that im not jk rowling. LOL: And im tickled that ths stori had me cracking up like it did so ull probably get at least one laugh out of it. ---
Looking around the place he could probably decided for himself that it was not fit for living in. With its dirt caked counters, vine grown walls, and wobbly floorboards, the house was probably a hideout for bankrobbers and murderers at one point. Maybe or maybe not, the house did have a history.
"I want to know why this place has been abandoned for so long!" Petunia Dursley exclaimed. "It's gorgeous."

"I knew you'd like it," a woman answered delightedly. "It can be cleaned up easily. We're, as you can see, in the process already."
"Oh, can we take it dear?" Petunia begged, looking at her husband.
"Alright. I suppose we could." Vernon searched through his wallet furiously before handing thee realtor a good sum of money.

.
Sirius sat out on his back porch, face in hands, thinking. He remembered as a child running through those weeds, over there, by that fat tree. He remembered sitting up in that tree, reading through old spell books he had found in the attic or charming the branches to roll into shapes. Looking to his left he sighed, remembering the time he had smashed his head on the back fence, or looking to the right, he remembered the many times he had gotten into trouble and had to de-gnome the garden. But those memories were nothing but memories now, and were the only things he'd even bother to keep at all in his mind. He was usually able to escape when he went outside, but inside, the feelings bottled up inside him through the years. He heard the back door slam and stood up to find his cousin's daughter, Tonks, smiling (now a very business like- brunette). "Sold." "Good." Sirius replied, not looking up.
"Aren't you even a little sad to leave this place?"
Sirius shook his head. "The sooner I leave the better."

"problem however."
:What?"
"The people I sold the place to are muggles, so you need to rip down the house elf heads."
"Gladly." Sirius replied, still no emotion in his voice.
"I suppose the family tree could stay since it hints no magic, except that it won't come off."
"Not our problem, they weren't our family really, now were they?"

"Oh, and speaking of family, your mum's got to go."
Sirius laughed. "I've tried to get her to leave. I'd love to tell her we sold the place to muggles just to see her face. Oh, she'd scream, and yell and- well, we'll have to get rid of her."
"Starting today we need to clear this junk out."

Sirius nodded, stood up and stepped inside. He shivered. So many bad memories were forcing their way back into his mind. To ignore them, he began to pull and yank at a house elf head of a particularly ugly one. "So whqat kind of muggles did you sell the place to?"
"Some people named Dursley."

Sirius's mouth hung open. "The Dursleys?"

"Yeah, problem?"

"I didn't want my godson to suffer the same fate I did."

"What's Harry got to do with this?" Tonks questioned, pulling a chocolate bar out of her pocket and biting into it.
"Petunia Dursley is Harry's aunt. He lives with the Dursleys!"

"Not anymore he does." Tonks replied, biting into her chocolate again.
"Dumbledore said just because I'm back and alive again doesn't mean that he can live with me. Besides, he's also not ready to trust me after they all told me to stay put and I ran off to find the fight anyway."

Tonks shrugged. "Sirius, this way you can keep an eye on Harry too. Dumbledore doesn't even want him going to the Burrow unless there's a special reason."

Sirius groaned in frustration and smashed the house elf head to the floor. "I can't believe we just can't burn this place down and make it look like an accident that the insurance will covor!"

Tonks snorted. "For one thing this place definitely isn't insured. And for another it can't be burned down. Your mum put some kind of charm on it."

"Stupid charms. My mum was fascinated with them. Anyway, you finish the heads and I'll go try to get rid of you know who."
"Who?"

"My mum!" Sirius wailed. "Just shut up and keep working!" He turned and went toward the entry doors, and neared the portrait. "Hello mum."
"BLOOD TRAITOR OF THIS HOUSE! STEP OUT OF THIS PLACE!"

"Calm down mum." Sirius said, putting his hands up and taking a step backward.

"CALLING ME YOUR MOTHER ARE YOU!? YOU ARE NO SON OF MINE SIRIUS!"

Sirius closed his eyes for a moment before opening them again in frustration. "I'm not sure what I did to deserve that but ok."

She looked at him with anger, and complete dislike. "You haven't shut the curtains yet! Well go on boy!"
Sirius took out his wand. "Got to move you now sorry mum."

"DON'T YOU DARE!" she shrieked. "THIS IS MY HOUSE AND YOU WILL NOT TOUCH IT!"

"Correction!" Sirius replied. "It's my house now and I have just sold it!"

"YOU CANNOT SELL THIS HOUSE SIRIUS! YOU CANNOT-"
"Too late. It's sold. Now hold still." Sirius ran his wand along the rim of the portrait. "Stuck tight."
"I won't let you!" she cried. "I WILL NEVER LEAVE NUMBER TWELVE GRIMMAULD PLACE! EVER!"

With no progress made except for receiving a headache, Sirius walked off.
"Take it that didn't go well?" Tonks sniggered.
Sirius didn't even look up. He just sat down on the step ladder and cried.
"Oh, I'll deal with your mum then! You finish this-"
"My mum is stubborn. Just let the muggles deal with her. I'll finish the house elves but the things with permanent sticking charms on them are staying. I'm sure the Dursleys have seen it all before anyway."

"Alright."
Sirius wiped his eyes and looked away. "I can't believe I just cried."
"Oh, don't worry Sirius, I won't tell anyone." She paused, "The viel scarred you didn't it?"
Sirius nodded. "Ever since I escaped, nightmare's have robbed me of my sleep, pain has thieved my comfort. My skin burns at any warmth at all, and my hands, they shrivel at any slight cold. Relief never comes to me."
Tonks sat down beside him. "Anything I can do?"
"I tell you what I feel every day, but there is no solution."
"H-how did you escape? You keep refusing to tell!"

Sirius's face darkened, and his eyes narrowed in a way that told of something very unpleasant.
"It's ok, you don't have to tell."

.
"Get the bags boy!" Vernon snarled.
Harry nodded and pulled a heavy suitcase and his Hogwarts trunk behind him.
"We already put the furniture in." Petunia said delightedly. "Dudums, the place will thrill you!"
Dudley smiled at Harry struggling with his and Harry's luggage.
(Sirius had taken the house hiding charm off.)
Harry unfortunately was carrying a suitcase and a huge lamp that was obscuring his view.
Vernon opened the door. "Well here we are."
"WOW!" Dudley shouted, running around. "THIS PLACE IS COOL!"
Petunia replied with, "And close by to our last home."
"WHO DARES ENTER THIS HOUSE!?"
CRASH! Petunia screamed at the voice, before staring at her floral lamp on the floor in pieces. Harry recognized that voice and it had surprised him so that he dropped everything that was piled up in his arms. "That dreadful screaming!" Petunia wailed, covoring her ears. Harry ran over to the portrait of Mrs. Black and quickly closed the curtains. "What was that?" Vernon asked. "The last inhabitant of Number Twelve Grimmauld Place." Harry replied. His mind was racing. How could they sell the Grimmauld Place? Just because there was no use for it anymore? Since the death of- Sirius. He choked back tears. As soon as Petunia and Vernon had went into the kitchen and Dudley had gone upt o his room, Harry sat opened the curtains that surrounded Mrs. Black's portrait. He wanted answers. Why did they sell the house? Why wasn't he told? "Before you start screaming," Harry said calmly. "I want to know why they sold the house." To Harry's surprise, she didn't shriek or yell, but ansawered him. "I don't know," she said, annoyed. "But Sirius has definitely crossed the line." "Sirius is dead." Harry replied. "Since when? A few weeks ago he came back from that veil, if that's wshat you're referring to, Did he not tell you?"

Harry didn't answer. No, he didn't. "Says he wants to keep an eye on you." Harry still didn't reply. "Well that scum had better explain himself or-" she stopped when she noticed Harry wasn't listening. "Shut the curtains then and let me sleep!" Harry nodded and shoved back the curtains, still in disbelief. "Kid!"came a voice from the fireplace. Harry's heart lifted. Sirius! He turned to find himself in a ribcrushing hug from his godfather. But after a few moments, anger flushed through Harry and he snapped at Sirius with, "Don't even bother telling me that you're alive." "Harry-" Sirius paused. "I would've but Dumbledore wouldn't let me. He said it wasn't time yet. Besides, I'll spend all summer with you if you want." Harry heard his aunt and uncle laughing over a bottle of wine in the kitchen. "And you sold this place to the Dursleys." Sirius grined. "Yes." "Oh, and I talked to your mum."

Sirius's face paled. "Harry!" "And she's not to happy about the place being sold to muggles either."

"You talked to my mum? Without her screaming at you?" "Yeah, she too wants to know what's going on. So I found out from her that you're back and-"

"Oh Harry, I'm sorry I didn't tell you!" "Well if Dumbledore wouldn't let you." Harry muttered, not bothering to hide his disappointment. "PULL BACK THE CURTAINS!" Mrs. Black yowled. Sirius sighed. "I don't want you to hear some of the words that are just going to come out of my mouth, so why don't you go upstairs for a while?" Harry glared at him and ripped back the curtains. "Harry dear!" Mrs. Black exclaimed. "I see you've found Sirius!" Her voice, however pleasant you may want to think it was, was the coldest, harshest tone I'd ever heard. "Hello mother." Sirius replied. "So! You think you're going to get away with selling this place!" "Yes." Sirius snapped. "You don't live here anymore! It's mine!" "Over my dead body!" she shouted venomously. "Ok. Since you're already dead." Sirius answered, grinning from what he found a clever reply. "YOU'LL REGRET THAT!"

"Mrs. Black! You have no idea what will happen if the Dursley's come in here!" "After that bottle eof wine their in there sharing they'll believe anything!" she snarled. "THEY STOLE MY HUSBAND AND MINE'S WINE FROM THE CELLAR THOSE ROTTEN MUGGLES! THOSE ROTTEN MUGGLE LIPS ON OUR WINE GLASSES! NO DOUBT THEIR DRINKING FROM THE BOTTLE TOO! MY HUSBAND WAS AGING THAT ONE FOR TWELVE YEARS! TWELVE YEARS!"

"Mrs. Black please!" Harry pleaded. "AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!" she shouted at Sirius. "Oh!" Sirius replied, color flushing from his face. "Is that all you care about!? A bottle of wine!? What about me!? Your son!?"

"My son! Ridiculous!" Mrs. Black said coldly. "I only ever had one son and he died quite a few years ago! I would never have dreamed of a second son!" Harry knew the moment that Sirius took out his wand that something bad was going to happen. He dived between the portrait and Sirius and took out his wand, pointing it at Sirius. "GET OUT OF THE WAY HARRY!" Sirius ordered. He pointed his wand at the portrait. "It's just a portrait Sirius! Your real mum is dead!" "SHE IS NOT DEAD! SHE'S RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF ME-" The only thing Harry could think of doing was bringing Sirius down to the ground. He sprung and knocked Sirius over and took his wand. "GET OFF ME HARRY! LET ME FINISH HER OFF!" "Sirius stop it! You'll get the Dursley's out here-" Sirius rolled Harry over so that he was on top, pinning him down. "Harry please let me finish her! You have no idea how horribly she treated me!"

"When will you learn Sirius." But it was not Harry whom had spoken, it was Mrs. Weasley. Sirius smiled weakly and stood up, brushing the dirt off of his robes (Harry closed the curtains then). "Hello Molly."

Molly glared at him. "And poor Harry dear! Stuck in the middle of your fight with your mother!" Sirius looked at Harry, his ears pink. "Sorry Harry. I couldn't help it. She-She- you heard her!" "To the new Order headquarters!" Mrs. Weasley exclaimed, cutting Sirius off. "Come now Harry. Just for the day. We'll have you back with the Dursley's before bedtime." "Can't I stay there?" Sirius shook his head, but gave no reason. "Molly, I'll write the note to the Dursleys." Harry was reading over Sirius's shoulder when a really dirty word started flowing from Sirius's quill. Mrs. Weasley covored Harry's eyes (Sirius grinned sheepishly as Mrs. Weasley smacked him.) "Well that does it." Mrs. Weasley replied. "Let's get going." "1268 REDWOOD LANE!" Sirius bellowed, the flames swirling around him. Harry found himself in a wonderful redwood cabin, covored with various green furniture and wooden end tables. There was a door too, inside where lay the kitchen with a long table. Upon stepping inside- WHAM! Harry looked up to find himself lying on a couch, Sirius holding a cold washcloth to his head. "What happened?" Sirius laughed. "We forgot to tell you about Erville." "Erville?" Harry asked, feeling the splitting headache coming on. "Erville." Sirius repeated. "Erville's a stupid ghost really. Hasn't got a clue in him." Harry groaned. "Ran smack into you."

A rugged, looking ghost in a tattered old hiking outfit shrugged. "Sorry mate."

Mundungus was sitting next to Sirius swigging down a beer. "Lo' Harry!" "Hi Dung." Harry said, feeling dizzy. "Oh!" Sirius snatched Mundungus's pipe. "If Molly catches you smoking again she'll have a cow!" "MOO!" Mundungus uttered, apparently having drank one too many beers. Sirius shook his head and looked at Harry. "Anyway, welcome to the redwood cabin."

"It's nice." Harry replied. "Where'd you get it?" "Bought it off some muggle whom sold it for cheap, claiming it was haunted." (Erville waved.) "Why not the Grimmauld Place?" Harry asked. "Needed a change, in case someone was gonna catch on soon. But we can keep a watch on you and the Dursleys there at least."

"Oh." Harry replied. "So I have to go back there?" "I wasn't too keen on the idea myself but I was completely overruled. Let me give you the grand tour." Harry removed the washcloth from his head and followed Sirius into a far room. "This is a bedroom, and- this is another bedroom- the kitchen. Oh, and do watch your step there- right there- it's an invisible step." Sirius caught Harry before he fell. "Oh and this is the bathroom- and this is a closet- and this place isn't that different from an ordinary house except that it's in the middle of a forest. Oh but there's one door you must never go through- that's what makes this place different. Never go in there."

"Why not? What's in there?" "Never you mind that!" Sirius snapped. "Just never go in there!" Harry nodded, not wanting to argue. Sirius, without realizing it, had just built up curiosity. They passed an unusual portrait of a fish fishing and Sirius let out a short, barklike laugh. "Mundungus figured that needed a change, so the fisherman's in the water and-" Sirius paused. "You get the idea." A bell rang and Mrs. Weasley called, "DINNER!"

Sirius sniffed the air and moaned. "Sounds like she's torturing us with meat loaf again."

"It's good!" Harry replied. "Mrs. Weasley is a good cook!" "Secret Harry: Meatloaf tastes just like rats."

Harry didn't eat any meatloaf after that. "Harry dear, eat something!" Mrs. Weasley exclaimed. Harry glared at Sirius, whom laughed in return. "This is your doing isn't it!?" she snarled. "Dishes."

Sirius also didn't laugh after that. "So," Harry said after everything was cleaned up. "Care for a game of wizards chess?" "Can't Harry, got to get you back to the Dursleys."

Harry moaned. "Harry! You knew we had to take you back!" Sirius replied, dodging Erville. "Why does Erville keep running into us?" Harry asked. "Erville is stupid, and that's what blinded him. Went fishing and got the hooks into his eyes. Plucked em' right out." Sirius grinned and made a popping noise, making Harry wince. Erville stuck his tongue out (but in the wrong direction) before zooming away. "He won't talk about how he died though." Sirius replied. "Anyway-" He stepped through the fireplace, Harry following, and shouted, "NUMBER TWELVE GRIMMAULD PLACE!" The Grimmauld Place swirled into place and Harry found himself sadly waving to Sirius as he disappeared into the flames. "What is the meaning of this!?" Vernon bellowed. Harry opened his mouth to say 'I don't know' when Mrs. Black called, "HARRY GET OVER HERE NOW!"
"What is that!?" Petunia screamed.
"Apparantly this house belonged to wizards, and they left a portrait of theirs behind."

"Oh dear! Your lot again!" Petunia squealed.
"One moment." Harry opened the curtains to find MRs. Black's eyes red and glaring at him. "WHERE DID SIRIUS GO!?"
"He left." Harry yawned, feeling tired.
"GET HIM BACK HERE! HE HAS A LOT OF EXPLAINING TO DO ABOUT WHAT HE DID WITH MY DEAR KREACHER!"

Harry sighed. "Sirius didn't do anything with Kreacher."
"WHERE IS HE THEN!?"
"He's locked in the attic."

"WHY DID SIRIUS DO THIS!?"

"I told you he didn't- if you hate him so much than why do you keep asking for him every two minutes!?" Harry snarled.
Mrs. Black looked flushed and slightly surprised. "I didn't hate him."
"You said it yourself."

"I didn't hate him until he ran away."
"He says he ran away because you hated him."
"I was certainly fed up with him if that's what you mean, but a woman needs a better reason than that to hate her own son doesn't she?"
"You shouldn't have hated him at all! You should have loved him!"
Mrs. Black then disappeared from the portrait, and by Phineas's shouts upstairs, Harry could tell that she had appeared there.
Harry felt angry and even as he climbed into his bed, he still felt fury. All those years he and Sirius had the same emotions bottleing up, anger. It wasn't fair why some people were treated the way they were. Harry turned out his light and lay in the dark. Sirius was still better off, Harry thought. At least he had a family. Why were Lily and James Potter the targets? Why was he Harry Potter? Why him?
Besides, Sirius never had to sleep in a cupboard under the stairs.
A cupboard under the stairs.
Then wake up to find Voldemort.

Harry wanted to talk to someone. He felt lonely. He picked up the shattered bits of the mirror he had smashed that Sirius had given him. He had saved every piece. Every single piece. It was from what he thought would be the last time he would have ever seen Sirius again. He felt warmth through him that Sirius was alive again. Hoping it would still work, he looked into it and hissed, "Sirius."
No answer.
"Sirius."
"Hello Harry." A voice replied.
"Oh! Sirius! Good!"
But there was something different about that voice.
"Feeling confident Harry? Or would you like to discuss your problems?"
There was an earthshattering scream and Harry dropped the shards in his hands. H ehad to see who was talking. He sat on the floor and tried to place the pieces back together, but got no where.
"Harry, do you know who I am?"
Harry shivered,that voice was familiar.
"Hello Harry." The voice repeated.
"No!" Harry shouted, closing his eyes. "WHO ARE YOU!?"
"I see the Grimmauld Place through this mirror. I see the Grimmauld Place! Lily! Quick! He's with Sirius!"

"Sirius?" a woman's voice asked. "Oh Harry dear!"
"Mum?" Harry asked weakly. "Dad?"
"He remembers us Lily!" James exclaimed.
"Where are you dad? I can help you guys! You're alive!"
Lily replied, "No. We're memories, merely memories. We are in the Department of Mysteries, behind the black veil, that's where we live dear. Well, we're dead of course, but that's where everybody's memories are."
Harry felt a tear roll down his cheek. "Mum, dad, I love you."
Harry felt himself being pulled into a hug and the words 'goodbye' (password to turn the mirror off) uttered.
"Sirius?" Harry sniffed, pulling himse,lf away from Harry. "Let me go Sirius! I want to-"
"Harry they're dead!" Sirius replied, also in tears.
"Why do they have the mirror!?"
"I dropped it in the veil."
They sat there for a long time, until Sirius felt that Harry had fallen asleep. He got up and tucked Harry into the bed. "Love you kid. See you in the morning. I'll take you to the Redwood Cabin tomorrow. I won't make you stay here with my mum and your parent's memories anymore." Please review and tell me if u liked it.