The Fellowship of the Sissies

[Authors note/disclaimer: My friend and I wrote this, and we own none of these characters. If we did.....BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! -coughweezechoak- x_X]

[Co-authors, no sorry, AUTHOR's note (she made me type that): Smile! :)]

The forces of good had once again beaten the evil forces. That is why Isiludur and Elrond found themselves on Mount Doom.

"Please throw the ring in the fire" said Elrond, with a big smile.

"Why, certainly, Elrond" said Isildur, with an even bigger smile.

And he did.

Of course, because that would make a really, really, really, really, really, pointless fanfiction, the ring shouted out "NO!OOOOOOOOOOOO" (in a squeakly voice) and grew wings and flew away. Mysteriously, it fell into a river, for it had expired its frequent flyer miles.

"I knew I should have travelled more! Glub, glub, glub." The glubs on the rings part was not purposeful, for whatever he had meant to say was translated into glubs as he fell into the water. Duh.

Of course, he didn't stay there long. A mysteriously appearing hobbit found him then.

"Oh, look, it's a ring."

He took it to his friend, in a boat.

(The friend was in the boat, not him)

"Oh look, it's a ring.", said his friend. Suddenly, the friend had a violent shudder, threw off all his clothes (luckily, he didn't go commando today) and pushed his friend into the water, where the friend was mysteriously never heard from again.

Because the hobbits were not fond of mostly nude hobbits, this hobbit almost in his birthday clothes was shunned.

"I, Gollum means Gollum, am shunned"

He went to the Misty Mountains. There, he found a nice cave. He ate fish. Then, one day, a hobbit came in.

"I am in a cave. Oh no! I'm talking like Gollum! AH! My precious...." The other hobbit therefore took the ring to a blacksmith to get it copied so that they could both have it. The blacksmith refused, and Bilbo realized he had forgotten his way back. Therefore, he went back to his home in the Shire. A dragon mysteriously disappeared and was never seen again, as well as a bunch of dwarves that Bilbo had came with.

"Oh well." And Bilbo went whistling all the way home.

In the time it took him to go back, the Sackville-Bagginses decided to raid his house. However, they thought better of it, and went back home to drink some tea. Frodo, whose father was named Drogo, mysteriously appeared at Bag End.

"Hello, Bilbo."

"Hi. Oh, you are somehow related to me. Let me adopt you!" And Bilbo did.

Years passed. Gandalf came.

"I am here to interrupt the children-like process of this fanfiction."

Suddenly, a house dropped on him. Radagast stepped out of the house, and took Gandalf's ruby slippers.

"I will now take over this plot! Gather to me, fellowship of the sissies!"

Suddenly, seven more houses dropped down. From each house, a member of the Fellowship stepped out. Sam noted, "I have a feeling that we're not in Kansas anymore."

Pippin said, "You were never in Kansas."

Radagast said they must destroy a ring.

"Can we travel with houses again?" implored Legolas

"No. You've used up your frequent flyer miles."

"I haven't!", piped up Frodo, before realizing he had never had any frequent flyer miles, because he walked to places instead of flying.

The fellowship took a vote. Two people wanted to get pizza; three wanted to go and get hopelessly lost and get some new names; two more wanted to meet some talking trees; one wanted to mysteriously vanish and then spook the three people.

So they did. Obviously.

Sam and Frodo ended up getting pizza at Minas Morgul, where they were being served by a giant spider named Shelob. Aragorn, Gimli, and Legolas got hopelessly lost and got some new names. Aragorn got Wingfoot; Gimli got Lock-Bearer; Legolas got. . . . .

"Hello Wingfoot!"

"Hello Lock-Bearer!"

"Hello," the comment was interrupted by a random bunny stampede.

The other person sneaked up as them, disguised as a bunny rabbit.

"BOO!" he shouted. This was Radagast.

The three ran all the way to Rohan, got horses, and rode to Gondor. There they fought valiantly against an evil force, only they were fighting in chicken suits because the title is "Fellowship of the Sissies", not "Fellowship of the Valiant People".

The two people got free rides to Mount Doom, and dropped the ring into the fire. The ring had already used his frequent flying miles, and he was destroyed in the fire.

And the fanfiction mysteriously vanished after that.

"I never win.", pouted the ring.

And THEN THE FANFICTION MYSTERIOUSLY VANISHED. . . .

"I'm just saying-"

IT VANISHED!

"Please?"

THE END.