Warnings: Implied PTSD and depression, mentions of past violence, some minor angst.
Notes: For the prompts: 1) Lucius/Narcissa, 2) Come with me, 3) Springtime, 4) Outdoor sex (mentioned, not central)
After The Fall
After the fall of the Dark Lord, things weren't quite the same in Malfoy Manor.
First, there was the emptiness and quiet that Narcissa never became quite accustomed to. Draco left the Manor almost immediately, seeking out honest work somewhere in London for reasons he did not disclose to Narcissa, but ones she somehow understood.
Then, there was the way that the Battle had changed Lucius. He had watched his entire family suffer, learned the hard way that his servitude to the Dark Lord was not without its terrible consequences, and watched his son determinedly abandon Pureblood tradition as a result. The trauma and the difficulty altered him. He was still silent and enjoyed alone time, but it was different, somehow. His silence was nervous, as though he was anticipating the Dark Lord himself would emerge from around a corner at any given moment. He shut everyone out, including her, and she was someone he had never shut out before. She understood that he needed time. She understood that when he looked at her, he remembered how she had been punished, too, and that it was difficult. She understood all of that - but it was still hard.
Sometimes it seemed like being in the Manor, the site of so many horrible occurrences and punishments from an entity Narcissa could now only describe as evil incarnate, made things worse for Lucius. She wondered if, everywhere he looked, he could see reminders of what transpired, of the pain, of the suffering, of the murmured spells and curses meant to cause harm and teach lessons.
"Come with me," she said, one day.
Lucius looked up from where he was staring at the floor in the corner of his study, brow furrowing. A look of unease was already beginning to form over his face. "Sorry?"
"Come with me," she repeated. "Just outside, around the Manor grounds. For a walk."
"I'm not certain if…" Lucius trailed off.
Narcissa made her way over to him, her dress gliding against the floor, footsteps muffled with practised ease and silence. "Come on, old man," she teased. "Are you going to let your wife walk all alone, by herself, out in the heat?"
He chuckled. Like all his laughs these days, it didn't reach his eyes, but something was better than nothing. "You've done just that plenty of times. You manage the heat better than me."
"I know," Narcissa smirked. "Are you coming, or not?"
Lucius stood up. He still looked hesitant. "Just outside?" he asked.
Narcissa softened. She smiled and reached for his hand. "Just outside."
There was a pause, and Narcissa wasn't sure for a moment if she'd pushed him too far. Then, he took her offered hand, and she led the way.
The flowers were just beginning to bloom in the fields around the Manor in Wiltshire. Narcissa couldn't remember the last time she'd felt the sun on her skin - but for Lucius, it had been even longer.
"Have you heard from Draco?" Lucius asked.
Narcissa shook her head. "You know how they are when they're young. So determined to be independent. He'll come around."
They came to a shadier area. Narcissa walked over to a spot beneath a tree. Elegantly folding her legs beneath her, she sat on the grass, and, glancing up at her husband, patted the spot next to her.
Lucius obliged, taking a seat beside her. After a moment of silence, he spoke. "This is nice."
"Aren't you glad you came with me?" Narcissa smiled.
"Perhaps," Lucius replied.
Narcissa rolled her eyes. "Always so stubborn," she sighed, leaning against him.
They shared a comfortable quiet for a moment.
"Listen, Cissy, I know it's been hard -"
"Shh," Narcissa soothed.
"No, listen," he said. "I know I've been less than favorable company, or barely any company at all. I know I've neglected our relationship, and my duties to the Manor, and that you've had to handle our affairs. I assure you, it is not my intention to alienate you in any way, and I greatly appreciate your patience and everything you've done.."
Narcissa hoped her sharp intake of breath had gone unnoticed. This was probably the first time in months that he'd spoken at even half that length. Struggling to conceal the emotions that she knew he would see through anyway, she nodded. "While I cannot understand your position, as I have never been in it, I can empathize with what you are going through," she said. "Please, take your time."
Lucius reached for her, gently cupped her face in his hands, and kissed her, slow and sweet. She sighed contentedly, having missed his touch and affection, and remembered, then, the way they'd been before. How they'd lain here, in this field of flowers in the springtime, making quick work of each other's clothes, their moans and cries filling the air as Lucius filled her. Later, they'd lament about their soiled clothes and dirty hair, and whisper about the risks of being seen, but that never stopped them from doing it again, and again, and again - even when Bella stumbled upon them once and shrieked about it for days after.
It felt like forever ago when they'd last had fun like that, when she'd last seen Lucius smile so genuinely, much less laugh. She wished she knew how to bring that joy and happiness back, but she didn't, and deep down, she knew this was not something that any amount of love could truly cure.
So instead, she took his hand. "I'll always be here, you know," she said, wishing she had more to say, wishing there was more she could do.
Lucius looked back at her. There was a small trace of a smile on his lips. "I know," he said.
And perhaps that was enough.
