A/N: This is happens during episode 1 of season 5, on the afternoon of Kurt and Blaine getting back together. It plays with some of the themes from 'How A Hero Breathes', but that is a bit heavy to read on a whim, so there's really no need to read it before you read this.
Warning for a brief mention of Finn, as this happens before he canonically passes away.
Those (Elusive) Moments
by padfoot
...
"Can we stay for a minute?"
Kurt gives Blaine a quizzical look, but sits down again. They're in the auditorium after Glee rehearsal, Kurt continuing his habit of sitting in on them while he's back from New York. It's been a crazy day, what with them only getting back together this lunchtime, and Blaine knows that Kurt is dying as much as he is to go home and announce the good news to Burt and Carol. Maybe they'll all phone Finn together to tell him as well. It'll be great to be back with Kurt's family, to be there as a part of Kurt's family again, maybe not officially but... well, Blaine is already having ideas.
Except for now, this comes first.
"I want to show you something," Blaine says, biting his lip, nervous already. Is this too much? Does Kurt not want to dwell in the past, does he want to pretend that their break up, that Blaine's enormous, stupid, unrepeatable betrayal was just a bad dream in the joyous doze of their relationship?
"Okay." Kurt draws the word out, sounding suspicious. He knows Blaine is antsy, and his head is turned to the side slightly, beautiful at this angle under the dim auditorium lights.
Blaine reaches up a hand to touch Kurt's cheek, running his fingertips along the bone there, then down Kurt's neck to rest on his shoulder. A comforting weight, hopefully. A this-is-something-good-I-promise type of weight.
"It's up on stage. Can you come with me?"
A nod, and Kurt is standing up again, following Blaine up onto the stage and behind the curtain. They cross the stage, heading right to the back corner, where black curtains are hanging down and today's backdrop hangs up in the dark. Blaine slows to check he's in the right place, then steps into one of the gaps between the curtains for the wings, turning to face Kurt. For his part, Kurt still looks unsure, but when Blaine gestures Kurt moves in closer. Quickly, Blaine takes Kurt's hands.
"I know you don't recognise this place," he blurts out, then breathes and tries again, "I mean, you've probably never thought of it as anything special or important. To us, I mean."
"Well, we're on stage," Kurt shrugs, "I understand how that's important."
"But not this particular part of the stage. This place right here – right now it's only important to me."
There's a pause as Kurt raises his eyebrows, his patience clearly wearing. Blaine bobs up on his feet a bit, urging Kurt to just go on a bit longer, to humour him with this.
"Why is this place important to you, Blaine?"
"Because I was standing right here when you gave me hope for us to be together again. There was a ladder and it was Sectionals and everything in the Glee club was up in the air. And my phone rang and you called me and I came here. I stood here and I heard you tell me that you loved me, Kurt, and in that moment I swear my heart started beating again."
Kurt lets out a little breath, looks up and around and then back at Blaine. Blaine's grip on Kurt's hands shifts, and his gaze is straight on Kurt's, Blaine feels tears start to prickle in his eyes, but he smiles, squeezes Kurt's fingers and goes on.
"I remember hearing those words, Kurt. Hearing that I was still your best friend, that you missed me, that you wanted- wanted to talk again and just, just be us again. You weren't even promising anything – you weren't even promising this-" he tugs on Kurt's hands for emphasis, pulling him closer so that their bodies are touching, "-but you gave me hope. And I- I just wanted to share that with you. To share this with you.
"You saved me, Kurt, when I stood here at Thanksgiving and spoke to you. You save me every day of my life, when I wake up and know you're there, even if you're on the other side of the country. Because even here in the darkest, smallest corner of the world you found me and told me I meant something to you."
Blaine nods down, trying to will the tears out of his eyes.
"You saved me," he says again, with a little half shrug.
He doesn't know how else to express it. Doesn't know how else to explain the feeling of being able to breathe again. Of being given a reason to breathe again.
His face inches away from Blaine's, Kurt is crying too, in his quiet, peaceful way. They're not violent tears, but they're not quite happy tears either. This is a reminder of what things were like when they were bad. It's a call back to those elusive moments that seem a staple of Kurt and Blaine's relationship: moments of transition. From strangers to friends, from friends to boyfriends, from boyfriends to lovers. From lovers to something less than friends but more than enemies. Some awful middle-ground where you know too much about someone to ever be able to love or hate them properly.
And this place among the curtains represents another moment, an emergence from that middle-ground back into friendship. A beautiful friendship loaded with promises and latent traces of love. Love that existed like little glowing veins in the hearts of fallen heroes, just waiting for few small victories to pump blood back into them.
"You saved me too, Blaine," Kurt sniffs, "Remember, from Karofsky?"
Blaine smiles wetly, and Kurt reaches out to thumb his tears away, keeping his hand warm and tender on Blaine's cheek.
"So I guess we're even then," Blaine replies
"I guess we are."
They both sniff some more, laughing a little at their tears. It's silly to be so upset. This is a happy day, a wonderful day. They don't need reminders of the past, not now.
So Blaine pulls Kurt in closer, wraps his arms around his shoulders and hugs him close and tight. Kurt is such a comfortable shape in his arms, his body lean and hard and heartbreakingly perfect. Blaine knows his tears will be staining Kurt's shirt and he doesn't want that, feels guilty about darkening the striking purple and taking away its glow. But Kurt is holding him tight, lifting a hand behind Blaine's back to wipe his own tears away, and Blaine is willing to put laundering drama aside just for this moment.
"I love you," he whispers into Kurt's shoulder.
"I love you too," Kurt murmurs back.
The curtains form a cocoon around them, and the auditorium is empty and silent. In the darkness and the solitude, Blaine feels no weight of expectations on his shoulders. He and Kurt are together again – solid and sure. They have a past, yes, but it doesn't have to be an issue. It's just another series of moments to add to their collection.
Kurt pulls back and Blaine blinks up at him for a second, both of them sharing a wobbly smile, somehow full of so much more contentment and sureness than the widest of grins. Then Kurt leans in presses his lips to Blaine's. The kiss is short and chaste, but Blaine smiles wider at it, his hands gripping Kurt closer and tighter.
There will always be a mix of good and bad times. Blaine knows that, and he's sure Kurt does too. What matters is that the good always finds a way to outweigh the bad.
Right now though, Blaine thinks, with Kurt in his arms, and the promise of many more kisses on his lips, the count of bad times is falling far behind. The glow of the good feels like a real presence within him, like an openness and a freedom. Like those heroic veins in Blaine's heart have truly recovered from drought, and are humming now with a renewed sense of purpose.