me: My friend em wrote this so here we go :D

em:don't expect this to be any thing special coz its like 2 am n i haven't slept in days plus this actually has very little to do with temple run, and its a funny oneshot soooo but it was probably more funny at the time But hey what ya gonna do about it D:

Sooo I'm the guy in temple run who often gets killed, blown to bits AND eaten D: Its really annoying because I could be sitting down stroking a pink fluffy cat. YOU CANT BEAT THE FLUFFINESS. But instead im burning my ass off running away from mutant Monkey men. Right so rewind This evil despicable well dressed kinda cute... WAIT I DID NOT MEAN CUTE. I meant Ugly... yeah ugly person decides to make me fly off the edge of a cliff and into an alligator and I get eaten... EATEN well at least the player was cute... I MEAN UGLY. Well it could be worse, I could be a twilight character.

-in mind-

HMMM strange dream

Edward cullen: Hello

me: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

(randomly gets bat )

Die Edward die HOW DARE YOU DESTROY MY VIEW ON VAMPIRES YOU SPARKLY GAY IDIOTIC EXCUSES FOR A CREATURE OF THE NIGHT. EVEN JUSTIN BIEBER IS MORE MANLY THAN YOU and that's saying something.

Edward: But (breath) I love you

me: CAN IT SPARKLES GO AND CRY TO BELLA

that's if she is even alive I mean she is like a puppet... A PUPPET

-reality-

Well that was fun, so maybe Twilight wouldn't be that bad. I COULD KILL EDWARD CULLEN AND BELLA SWAN (sparkly eyed)

Well I need a girlfriend. There is this girl called Jupitor a few apps away but she is WAY out of my league.

A couple of days ago this player gets up to have some water, her friend said something funny and she spits water allover the kindle. I MEAN BEING SPIT ON BYE A CUTE...I mean ugly girl is not on my to do list. No my to do list is this

-to do list-

1. Go on vacation

2. start a family

3. Get a pink fluffy cat called noodles

4. Get spit on by cute...I mean ugly girls

5, Bake a cake

6. Bake a another cake

7. Make a to do list

8. find a descent book

9. Read fan fic

10. Get a girlfriend

Wow so what do yah know it is on my to do list, ANYWAY moral of the story is think before you drink... Random and a tad bit awkward.

Well im off to Hawaii for a vacation so bye and please DON'T kill me

me: well thats it, you can go home now...WAIT you want more. WELL If you want cooler storys then read my other storys

REVIEW FOR THE SAKE OF GUY WHATSHISNAME FROM TEMPLE RUN