Oh hey reader my name's Percontator, but you can call me Perc. I'm a deity one of the people in charge of, well everything. My specific job is being the afterlife's interrogator not the best job but it can be fun, Like that time Hitler came over.

Mostly I just punish people by doing the normal Hell stuff, but I also make people watch through memories of the worst things they did or caused... while torturing them. But I've got all this centuries work done.

"Hey surprise Perc theirs a war coming up in a couple years." Said Fatum although she prefers to be called Fate.

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF, come on I just got all my work done"

Fate started laughing, "yea well I got bored and the centuries war needs to start soon"

"Fine can you send them in early at least"

"Nope don't want to bye."

"Arg I'll just wait in my office."

Then a giant boom echoed through the office. I looked over and saw a wall of flame, I hadn't seen that curse for centuries. It forces someone to visit me for an hour If they deserve it, I wonder who it is.

The fire falls down and reveals... DUMBLEDORE HOLY SHIT. I check my expected list... hmm I wasn't expecting him for another 50 years. Well ok time to get into the interrogator mode.

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"Harry has had a... troubled childhood. This fact is well known to only a few, of course Harry but also you Dumbledore. everyone sees the grandfatherly, kind, wise headmaster of Hogwarts, from what I see he isn't all he's cracked up to be. YOU forced Harry to be put with those 'relatives' of his. Harry had to endure a decade of pure abuse, emotional, psychological, and physical."

"Ah here we are Dumbledore do you recognize this place, you should, or did you forget. After a decade I wouldn't be surprised, especially with your 'wonderful' mind"

"Ahh yes i know this place a couple of memories and this should be cleared up" said Dumbledore. "after all how could Lily's sister do anything to my boy"

"YOUR BOY ALBUS! You dare to try to trick me. Harry is not your boy, and don't try to block your memories from me, or change the scene Albus it will only make it hurt more" Yes cry your little heart out the pain isn't even that bad yet. "Get your blubbering arse off the ground the fire isn't that hot yet. Lets go in shall we, its almost breakfast now."

"AHHH" cried Albus feeling like his bones were melting, which they were in a way.

"Oh shut up, baby, here we are this memory came from Petunia"

§line break here§

I woke up today with my husband, as much as I loathed him he was loaded, at least he was supposed to be. When I married the fat lard it looked like he was loaded, expensive gifts every other week. And that engagement ring, it was made of pure gold and covered in diamonds with a huge ruby in the center.

Then the wedding, just wow, at the time it seemed like the best day of my life. I would finally be above my sister for once, she may have magic and a poor freak of a boyfriend, but i would have money! But no as soon as we got married his money dried up, and I barely managed to get this house big enough. Then a mirical happened the freak showed up on our doorstep and we had some income once again! But when I tried to leave him he got the Judge to over rule my plea.

Now i'm stuck here the freak Dumbledore won't let me leave. And Dudley how could I let him grow up without a father? I'll stay here untill he's old enough to leave.

I decided to head downstairs and wake up the freak and get him started on breakfast. I got out of bed carefully without waking my husband. Petunia visually shudders Once I had woken him up early after a night of drinking because he had an important meeting and he was going to be late. He woke up with a severe hangover, when he saw me he yelled and pushed me over and headed to the bathroom once he was done puking his guts out he took an advil but noticed we were out

"PETUNIA" yelled Vernon

Fuck, my period was a couple of days ago and I hadn't run out to get more. "y-yes d-dear w-whats wrong"

"THE ADVILS OUT YOU SLUT THATS WHAT"

Double fuck thats it at least he has work later so it won't be as bad. "I s-sorry dear I was on my period last week and hadn't run out to the grocers yet"

Vernon threw me on the ground and threw a vase at the back of my head and i blacked out.

When I woke up I checked the time and saw it was almost ten i got up and thought "well at least I don't have it as bad as the freak... and I guess I'm lucky that Duders doesn't get hit time to get ready my boy will want some breakfast.

§line break here§

"AHHHHHHHH" screamed Albus

I decided he still hasn't learned not to try to change the memories and shredded his foot. "Oh for the love of Merlin shut the fuck up." My god does he ever shut up, even Hitler shut up real quick.

"Fine i'll let the pain be numbed a little. Now you listen and answer me. How did Vernon get all that money?"

Albus started to answer me, "I did nothing." AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

"I said NO LYING TO ME NOW TELL ME THE TRUTH." When will the this moron learn?

Albus started talking. "I decided that Petunia n-needed a husband so s-she could raise H-harry"

"Now Albus why would you know about that the prophecy wasn't even made when they started dating... unless..." Why would he guarantee his soul to me. "Of course the Olim Corporis ritual. But why would the greatest 'Light Lord' of the century use such a Dark ritual."

"it was worth giving up Half my soul to give Harry a safe house to grow up in a-"

"ABUSIVE HOME, WHERE EVERYONE IN THE HOUSEHOLD IS AFFECTED." I wonder what else you caused, shall we see?

(AN) Welp the first chapter is done. This was going to be one chapter in my other story (please don't read it if you thought this one was bad the other is WAY worse) but i thought about It and decided it will be its own story. the next chapter should be out soon i just need to finish it.