There's a moment in your life, when you have to make a decision. One that will change your life forever. Everyone wants to make the right decision, but we rarely do. It's a natural human flaw, not knowing what we want, or what's right for us.
My milestone of a choice has to do with two people-two milestones in my life. Two people I love, for two entirely different reasons.
One I've loved since the day I've met. They came into my life unknowingly, at the worst possible time-and they're doing it yet again. At the time it happened, I was courting his best friend. Every time we would go out as a group, he was there-and I admired him from the sidelines, while he asked me for advice and flirted with me while swearing his heart to another. I felt a connection with him ever since that day, and it hasn't left my heart completely yet. He's quite funny, and wild-a free spirit indeed. The most fun is always with him, and looking at his myriad of friends, I can tell others feel the same way. He never loved me back though, this boy. I was always looked to for advice, and thought of as a friend, but never anything more; and was barely acknowledged as a friend. I wasn't what he was looking for, I guess. I forgot about him much after the day he broke my heart, the day he fell in love with a girl much prettier than me and with much more personality-I was no match for such an entity.
The second, I'd loved since a very young age-when it was just a simple crush and not a thriving, pure, yet passionate love. No, no, he didn't love me at that time either. The destined hero was always eager to make fun of me and tease me for my admirations. After long, I took heart that he would never love me, once in a while remembering that adoration-but never embracing it like I had once done. I had two flings between that time, and that's when I met the first.
As I said before, there were many times I remembered that spark, that longing I had felt around this second young man-and I finally embraced this longing once again when he approached me one night. You can say we fell in love that night-laughing and talking for hours, and a few days later he called, and we talked-and after there was no looking back. He was the reason I left my second fling-who I had finally realized I had no such real feelings for-not for my first love. We've been together for quite a while now, and we love each other-knowing this though we are still quite young. Frankly, we can't have enough of each other and I'm not happy without him.
I have seen my first love since the day he unknowingly hurt me though-quite so many times. Lately though, he claims he has fallen in love. Ha, a shadow-the real bachelor-falling in love? He believes so, but I don't know if I can trust him. It wasn't a problem, seeing him as a friend-though he admitted he'd much rather it be a date-and spending time with my official lover. So what is the problem, you may ask?
There isn't a true one. As I said before, all it is-is a decision. Though it is a decision that may change my life forever.
My hero has been out of town on duty lately, and the dark knight has been taking this time as an invitation to seduce me. It wasn't working, that is-until I became utterly jealous…
Let me make this clear. There was a dinner party with a visiting aristocrat who brought his lovely, tall, frail and frightfully thin and obnoxious daughter. After using up most of my generosity and driving me to the brink of insanity, she decided to take the liberty of throwing herself at my dark knight. I understand since I have not given into his seducing that I have no control over who he flirts with, but let me say my eyes were getting rather green. So tonight, when he came to my chambers and announced that she asked him if he would court her, I can't much say that I liked the idea.
"No! Why, I mean she barely knows you!" I exclaimed, blinking rapidly-I hated when I did that.
"I know that but I do not want to deny her; and I have no other choices. Your nunnish ways have taken a toll on my show of power in the world of shadows, and though I love you dearly Zelda, I really do-you have not shone that you are half as interested in me as you are in my counterpart; so I really have no other choice! You either decide tonight which you'd rather have or I must take her as my-"
"So you are saying that unless you take someone in as your whore that you are powerless? What kind of people are those of the shadows? Why the twilight princess never had to give into lust to show her power. What is it different for you? No, I will not have it!" I exclaimed, pushing myself off the bed and sitting on the stool of my vanity and avoiding the mirror. I couldn't look at him-not now as he was trying to tell me he was to leave me.
"Zelda, if you truly loved me you would choose me. You would leave him for me-but you haven't. Your loyalty's are elsewhere! I cannot just give up on my people so that you may be given the privilege of having two loves," He got off the bed and touched my cheek, but I turned away. "Zelda, Zellie listen to me-"
"Don't you dare call me that. Not if you are going to leave me for some obnoxious, promiscuous whore. Not if you are going to deny my love for you." I stood, pushing him away, "Now get out, and leave my father's house. You are no longer welcomed here. We are no longer lovers-nor friends…" I left the rest alone. I had said what I needed to say, and had begun to sob. It wasn't the best approach when you were trying to kick someone out-but as queen-to-be, I would not let my voice waver, and I would make sure my orders were heard. "Leave, now."
He looked at me second, as if not sure I was real, and blinked slowly. "Fine, I will leave, my queen." He turned, and before he pushed open the door, whispered, "But I asked you only because I know that even if I agree to court her ladyship, that the only thing I could think about was you. I needed the truth from you before I could tell her for sure. I needed to know that you loved the Hero of Time, and not his shadow."
With that, he opened the door and closed it quietly. I listened to his footsteps fade down the corridor, and than lowered the hand I had used to point to my door.
He had come here to be assured of my love, and I had failed him…
I closed my eyes; I jumped onto my bed, and cried myself to sleep.
What could I do?
