CHAPTER - 7
Christian, Elliot, Carrick, and Ethan left for the ballpark at four with Taylor driving. It was a boys' night out. When Sawyer brought Anastasia home from work, she changed into jeans and her favorite new short sleeve silk tunic of soft teals and yellows in an abstract pattern when something caught her eye! She spotted her mother's quilt folded on the back of the chair in the bedroom. She picked it up and it smelled like sunshine. Then she checked the drawers that Christian had cleared out for her things, and everything smelled freshly laundered.
When she went out to the kitchen, she said, "Mrs. Jones, you're a miracle worker when it comes to cleaning. Thank you, my mother's quilt has never smelled so fresh."
"Ana, it's my pleasure. People pay a lot of money for a quilt with such workmanship. Did your mother make it?"
"When my mother moved to Texas with husband number three, she took up quilting. The marriage and the quilting were both short-lived. My mom is coming to the wedding so you can tell her yourself. I'm going to make a gin and tonic and wait for others to arrive. I know you made something special for dinner. I'm not sure how you could possibly beat the terrific picnic you prepared for us on Saturday. Your fried chicken and potato salad were the best ever. Christian ate four pieces, but you must know that it's one of his favorites, and that is why you made so much chicken. Thank you."
Ana watched Gail as she made the drink so she would know where to get the liquor when she wanted one on her own. "Do you want lime or cucumber?"
"I've never had it with cucumber. Do you know which gin to use?" Gail smiled.
Ana was sipping her gin and tonic with cucumber that was very refreshing. Grace arrived then Kate with her mother. Mia showed up last.
"Dr. Grace Trevelyan-Grey, I would like to introduce Kate's mother, Mrs. Cassandra Kavanagh. Cassandra, this is Christian and Elliot's mother, Grace." They shook hands. Grace thought that Cassandra may be her son Elliot's mother-in-law someday.
The conversation started about the wedding. Mrs. Jones made drinks and then served dinner without missing a beat. Anastasia felt comfortable in the penthouse, maybe because all of her possessions were in one place. Maybe because, at long last, she could entertain comfortably in Christian's surroundings or maybe because she was in the company of women - something she needed to strive to do more often.
That night she was measured for her wedding dress, picked out the ivory silk for the dress and fine Italian ivory lace for the overlay. All of her favorite women helped her make many decisions. Later Mia showed up after dinner. She had researched, chosen the meal and already had procured Christian's approval. She even consulted Gail, who made suggestions to enhance the dining experience.
Grace had talked to Ana's mother, Carla; it was Carla's idea about the napkins, to have only the bride and bridegroom's first initials entwined. Ana had a revelation about her wedding present for Christian. She would have a jeweler design platinum cufflinks with their first initials entwined.
Ana was happy and brought decisions to a halt when she mentioned José would be the photographer. She had already called and asked him. He told her he would do it only if Christian agreed. She knew it would be a big feather in his cap and money for his education. Ana loved her friend and only wanted the best for him.
Men stormed into the penthouse around nine with sad looks because the Mariners had lost but Ethan had caught a foul ball. Ana ran all the decisions by Christian and he approved of all of them. He realized that José was a talented photographer from his own photo shoot at the Heathman Hotel and from the photos he had taken of Anastasia that Christian adored and couldn't wait to hang in the new house. Mia and Ethan were the first to leave. The others stayed having coffee and dessert.
While they were getting ready for bed, Ana said, "I know why you like it up here so much."
"Why," he smiled.
"When you get over the intimidation of the size and style of the penthouse, you can appreciate the people you have in it."
"My God, she is making another profound statement, like raising the ordinary to the extraordinary," Ana blushed.
The first time Ana met Christian at Grey House, after she regained her composure from her stumble, when she looked around the room she noticed Christian's art work. That is when she said the comment about ordinary to extraordinary.
"You are teasing me, and I like it. I felt comfortable here tonight entertaining guests and when move into our new home, I hope it will have a little more ease and charm than this place."
"Ana, I never thought I would have someone share the penthouse with me other than subs. I think you have given the penthouse its glow. You have certainly lit up my life."
He was in bed waiting. "I had fun tonight with the boys. I don't know where Ethan fits in, but he does fit in. What do you think about Mia and Ethan together?"
"Let me turn off the light and get close to you. Mia is nuts about Ethan, but I think he thinks it's too early to get serious; only time will tell, but they are a good match. She will keep him from being too serious, and he will keep her grounded."
"I can read people in business, but you can read their relationships. Do you think Elliot and Kate will be permanent?"
Ana gave her opinion, "I think the two of them are in it for the long haul, but, at this point, I think it's all about the fun. Are you ready for some fun tonight or in the morning?"
He was wrapped around her and already was making the sweet sounds of sleep as Ana finished speaking.
Tuesday, July 5, 2011 as Christian entered Dr. Flynn's office when he noticed that John had painted. It was still green, only lighter and airier. "I see you took my advice and painted the place, and I also like the new rug. Oh, I get it; you took out the carpet and replaced it with a wood floor, nice job."
"Does anything ever get past you? Not one of my patients noticed the changes, just you. Did you have a nice Fourth?"
"Ana and I spent the afternoon with my parents making endless wedding plans. Do you know how much planning actually goes into a wedding? We stayed to watch the fireworks. I think Taylor and Sawyer were about to have a cow when the fireworks went off. We all made it home safe and sound."
"I know you aren't here to discuss redecorating or the 4th of July, so what's up, old man?"
"I'm worried."
After a minute passed, John finally said, "About what?"
"I know that she has agreed to marry me, but can I really make her happy?"
"Does she show any signs of being unhappy?" Christian shook his head.
"Then maybe you are the one who is unhappy."
"I'm afraid that I will drag her down with me in my own pit of hell."
"She won't let that happen, Christian. When you retreat into your dark hole, she follows to drag you back into the light. But this is not what is bothering you, is it?"
"I want her, and I feel so close to her, but I also feel that I'm not good enough. I have done terrible things to women and what if I revert back to who I was before?"
"Did you beat Ana, again?"
Christian's eyes bugged out of his head, "NO, for God's sake, no. I would never do that again."
"Then where is all this fear coming from?"
"I just don't think I'm man enough. I know I can give her material possessions and, hopefully, always protect her, but I don't know about matters of the heart; for years, I never thought I had one. How can I give her love when I'm not sure where it comes from? I'm desperate to be around her, but this fear is chewing me up. She is my more, but…I don't know how to show it."
John looked at him and saw the wounded boy, still needing his mother, sitting on his couch. "What do you want, Christian, "happily ever after" written in blood? You of all people know that life is unpredictable and has no guarantees. You have conquered so much in life, mostly without love, but now you have to face an uncertain future with love which makes this time in your life painful and fearful. If this was business, you would figure out the best strategy and follow a plan. Tell me your plan now for conquering your fear of love."
"I have to believe that, when she tells me she won't leave me, she will not leave."
He did not speak. John didn't know whether or not Christian was thinking or had given up. So he just let him be still.
After what seemed like an eternity of silence, he said, "Maybe I have to start believing in the power of her love."
He went back to silence, and John said, "What about the power of your love?"
Christian said quietly, "The power of my love?"
Finally, he looked up at John with a soul-wrenching look and said, "I have power in love?"
John waited again. "Yes, Christian, your love has power. You found that power when you gave Ana space to come back to you. You found the power to tell her you were a sadist, which we both know is untrue. You also knew your power when you asked her to marry you. Now she is neatly housed in your penthouse. What is the problem, Christian," he said with more force!
He said, "What if…?"
John became unglued and ran his fingers through his long black hair. "We don't discuss 'what ifs' in therapy. You know this, Christian. Damn it. You're breaking the number one rule. What the fuck is up, Christian," he roared.
"I found out today Jack Hyde was behind the sabotage of Charlie Tango. It was his print that was found on Charlie Tango. He tried to molest Anastasia and I fired his ass. How can I protect her? Does he want to harm me, Ana, or both of us?"
"Christian, this is news; will you tell her?
"No, it would do nothing but upset her. I don't want her upset before the wedding."
"Why would you be upsetting yourself like this? You have enough money and security to protect her. Is there more?"
"Only that they found things about my family on Hyde's computer at work. I was hoping that, when we leave the country Jack would be found and I could stop worrying."
"Christian, do you feel better now that you told me?"
"Yes, I guess it had nothing to do with love. It just had to do my fear and my need to protect Ana."
"Let's also say your need to control, Ana."
"Yes, I always need to control everything. It's amazing that before Ana, my life was controlled and now, with her, its chaos even sometimes at work. Ana is very much an independent woman. How did I ever think she was submissive material? You have given me much to think about as usual. I better go because I need to pick Ana up and, with Jack out there, I don't want to be late."
"She can't drive herself?"
"John, my staff takes her to work and picks her up. If Hyde could get to my helicopter, which is under twenty-four hour surveillance, then he certainly could tamper with her car in an open parking lot with no surveillance."
"True, but you aren't giving her any alone time. She is watched constantly."
"That may be true, but she has not complained too much. I think she is doing better since she has moved her possessions into the penthouse."
Christian stood up and stretched his large frame that shrank once he had thoughts of Ana.
Wednesday July 13, when Ana saw Kate come into the great room she said, "Oh, Kate, it has been ages. You look well, and how's Elliot?"
As they hugged she said, "He's doing great, and we're doing great. Where is Christian?"
"He had a meeting of some kind and I wanted to see you. Thank you for coming on such short notice. We have the place to ourselves for a few hours. I have missed just girl time. I know that the wedding is taking up most of my time, along with work and Christian. What do you want to drink?"
"Where are the mixings, I want to make Cosmopolitans?"
They walked into the kitchen and, with a little snooping, they found all the ingredients. Ana still didn't know where everything was, even after living in the penthouse for over a month. Ana found the martini glasses while Kate was busy with the shaker. Ana took a tray of finger food from the fridge that Mrs. Jones had prepared. Also she carried a pitcher of water for drinking. In the great room and nestled in the couch. Kate was blown away by the view of Seattle at their feet.
"How is your job at the Seattle Times, oh lowly intern?" Ana winked.
"We all don't have future husbands who buy the company so they can install us as from intern to an editor in five weeks."
"You forgot that I was acting editor for about a month."
"Oh, that makes it alright then?"
"I know you are teasing me, Kate, but others are pretty resentful at SIP. I can't tell Christian that or he would fire their asses, like he did Jack Hyde."
"Is Christian hard to live with?"
"Sometimes, but then I have no way of knowing what men are like to live with because I have only lived with my mother's husbands and mostly Ray, and you know he was as easy as pie to live with."
They finished their first drink, and this time Kate found another pitcher and filled it with Cosmopolitans. When she came back to the couch, Ana saw that and went for the finger food and had a glass of water.
After talking about work, family, and general gossip, Kate said. "You're my best friend, and I don't want to pry, but tell me, what was that damn submissive agreement I found?"
Ana was now on her third drink.
"We have kept each other's secrets for years. I know you will keep the one that I'm about to tell you. I couldn't tell you at first because I signed a non-disclosure agreement with Christian. When we first got together, I was considering doing what was written on that paper. Close your mouth! Then he found out that I was virgin. Oh I wanted that man. He dispensed of my virginity quickly, and I had an orgasm that rocked my world. I didn't know my body could react like that. When we were finished, I asked for more."
"You're a little brazen hussy."
"You've got that right, Kate. What Christian has done to me has changed my life. Why did I wait so long to have sex? Now it's my lifeline. I don't know if other people have sex four times a day; is that normal?"
Kate's mouth flew open, "Wow, four times a day. I know Christian is good looking, and most people would think he is a sex god but, in reality, he is your sex god. Where does the contract come in?"
"Like I said, I was considering doing it, after what he gave me that first night; I would have done anything to be with him. Then I slept in his bed and I knew I wanted the whole enchilada. But if he only wanted me as a submissive, then I was willing to try."
"That must have been pretty hot sex for you to consider such kinky shit."
"How did I know what kinky shit was? So I did my best to think of what I would and wouldn't do. That is how I got the laptop. He wanted me to do research before I met him the Wednesday night before graduation. I certainly couldn't look up how to be a submissive on your computer. Look how you reacted when you saw the paper. You were going to kick his ass all over his parents' house, but I stopped you because, by then, the arrangement had changed."
Kate poured them each another drink and she drank hers down.
"Ana, this is all hard to take in. How could you even consider doing some of those things?"
"The first answer is for him, the second answer is for the mind-blowing sex. When you went to Barbados…?"
"I'm sorry, Ana, what do you mean mind-blowing sex?" Kate was wondering if sex with Elliot was mind-blowing.
"You certainly should know. Mind-blowing sex is where my body convulses, and I feel like I have shattered into a million pieces, only to wake to Christian's face smiling, and then he will complete his orgasm. (She giggles) What's even better is when we come together."
Kate went into the kitchen made them each one last drink wondering how she would get home knowing she has had too much to drink.
"Okay, let me ask, when did you realize that you couldn't be a submissive, and what changed?"
"Kate, you're my dearest friend and, if you ever tell anyone what I'm about to tell you…"
"Ana, I'll never betray you, even Elliot doesn't know about the contract."
"When I got back from Savannah, Christian was so glad to see me. We had great sex, and then I went to sleep. Christian has a hard time sleeping, and I heard him playing piano in the early morning. What a sad lament! I got up to investigate. He was so lost and lonely that all I wanted to do was make him whole. We talked awhile, and I consented to a harsh form of punishment, just to see if I could do it for him. He wanted me to become his submissive, and I wanted him. What I'm about to tell you is my fault, not his." Kate's eyes were as big as saucers.
"I let him beat me with a belt. I could have stopped those six brutal lashes from the belt from ever hitting me, but I wanted to know if I could take it. I did, but the price I paid was losing Christian. I walked out on him that morning. I spent the next five days crying and not eating, but I did manage to start my new job. I've never known that kind of pain. My ass was sore for a few days, but the pain in my heart was overwhelming."
Ana started to cry, Kate tried to hold her, but she would not have pity. They both drained their drinks.
"On Wednesday, Christian sent me an email asking if I was going to José's show. I agreed to go with him take me the next night. He was polite and restrained until after the show; on the way to dinner, he took me in an alley and kissed me, like there was only that moment for him to love me in. I have not had a kiss like that since. I would have fucked in that filthy alley with no shame. Anyway on the ride back to Seattle, We flew down and drove back. We talked and he told me he wanted me with no contract, with no rules or devices. He wanted me! My Christian wanted me, vanilla sex and all. He changed when I left him, and now we're getting married."
"My God, if I read this in a book, I would definitely know it was fiction. Has he beaten you since?"
"No, only a few good spankings that have ended in incredible sex. What do think of your sweet Ana, who has used most of my orifices to have sex?"
"I think you're just as hot as Christian and I think he has met his match. Has he had other submissives and is that why when I looked him up online there were never any pictures of him with a woman?"
"I'm not going to answer that because that's Christian's past and his information to share. But from what I just told you he has never been gay or celibate."
"What a horrible thing to go through alone when I was away," Kate said quietly.
"Even if you had been here, I couldn't have talked to you because of the NDA. I only ripped it up a few weeks ago. And looking back on things, Kate, I'm glad you weren't here when I was going through the rough stuff. I grew up that week. I found out what I wanted, and it turned out to be Christian. I'll never leave him even if he beat me every day, which he won't. He is the sweetest man in the world who worships my body and tries to control the rest of me."
Ana got up and got each one of them another large glass of water. They talked few minutes before Christian entered the great room. His tie was undone so were the top two buttons on his shirt. For the first time and with her new perspective, Kate saw Christian with sex oozing from every pore. Ana had said he was sex on legs, and it was right in front of her now.
Ana got up and ran into his arms. She planted a kiss on him and he had no choice but to kiss her back.
Kate said, "Christian, could you take me home? I've had too much to drink."
Christian took one look at both of them and said, "Spend the night, I insist. Do you want me to call Elliot and tell him where you are?"
"No. I'll call him when I'm in bed."
For Ana, it was funny to see Kate tipsy. She had taken Christian's advice, eating and drinking water, so she had a buzz, but she wasn't drunk. They helped Kate to the bedroom upstairs where all the subs had stayed. Ana even told her there was a clean toothbrush in the bathroom.
As they shut the door, Christian said, "I can't leave you alone for one evening without you getting into trouble. I've been in a long boring dinner and then a meeting. I am exhausted and I want to sleep. I know what you want, but it'll have to wait till morning."
Monday July 18,Ana went to Neiman Marcus. She had spent the weekend roaming the beach and seeing the temperate rain forest in Olympic National Park during the day, and being tied to a four-poster bed at night; she was tired. The weekend was supposed to be relaxing, only they didn't get enough sleep. And now the thought of trying on clothes was almost more than she could bear.
Caroline Acton was nothing but efficient. "Good afternoon, Miss Steel. I must say that I'm impressed with your punctuality. I have everything waiting in your dressing room, just this way."
She opened the door to find Christian sitting in a chair. He said to Caroline, "Please give us a minute." She left discreetly.
He gave Ana a kiss of longing and desire. "I know you are doing this for me, and I'll wait outside for you to come out. You don't have to show me anything you don't want. I just want you happy and looking good on our honeymoon. If you want me to go, I will. After this past weekend, all things except you are boring."
"You can stay and please wait. Thank you for this. Thank you for everything. Only two weeks until you're mine, all mine." She kissed him back filled with longing and desire. There was a knock on the door and Christian left for his seat in the waiting area.
"I brought you a bustier so that you don't have to change undergarments. I should ask if my choices so far have been what you needed."
"Can I call you Caroline?"
"Of course, Miss Steel."
"I'm probably one of the few women on the planet who hates to shop. You're invaluable to me. I've developed a style now that I'm comfortable with, feeling at ease in the clothes. I was never as chic as I am now. We better get back to work Mr. Grey has an empire to run." She smirked at Caroline.
In the next hour, she tried on dresses, shorts, tops, and bikinis. Christian talked on his cell as she modeled giving her nod of approval or a shake of the head. The pile was getting bigger. After trying on two ball gowns, both of which he liked, she chose the long flowing gown in ice blue and didn't take the other.
Ana went out to Christian. "I'm going home after our discussion about intimate apparel, will I see you there or are you going back to work?"
"I can get just as much work done at home as in the office. You look tired. I'll wait here. I'll send Sawyer on home. We don't need two bodyguards."
Bras and panties were pretty easy, and she got an ivory satin gown and robe and ordered more stockings for work.
Ana said to Caroline, "Come to think about panties, I don't like thongs or even bikinis. I would rather have French cut. Thongs can cause a little chafing. I would also like a few sports bras. The bras you have picked have been perfect. I also need undergarments for my wedding. I seem to have turned into a Chatty Cathy, I like my clothes lined so I don't have to wear a slip."
"I'll make sure all the items you mentioned will go into your file."
"Sorry, Caroline, another question, do you ever shop at other stores?"
"Not usually, but I could do a little shopping on my own private time if there is something you want at another store."
"Taylor, Mr. Grey's assistant/bodyguard has bought me several things at Nordstrom's when I've been in a pinch. They are casual clothes that make me look my age."
"I'll do a field study over there and pick up a few things. If you don't like them then I can always return them. When I deliver the clothes to you at the end of the week, you can show me what style you are looking for."
"Thank you, Caroline; I think we are going to be good friends."
It was over – no more trying on clothes - her honeymoon clothes had been purchased. She had bought enough clothes for the rest of the summer. No more shopping in her immediate future.
When they got back to the Escala, it was nearly five. She said, "I deserve a cocktail for trying on clothes. It's really not my thing. If you had not been there, I wouldn't have bought half the stuff. You have exquisite taste in women's clothes. Thank you."
"I'll make you a drink, what do you want?"
"Something light and refreshing please."
She took off her shoes and went out onto the narrow balcony, something she had only recently been able to do; looking over the glass railing was unsettling. He found her and handed her a drink. She took a sip and said, "This is wonderful, what is this?"
"It's a Scotch Buck, scotch, fresh lemon juice, and ginger ale." She put it down on the small table and kissed him.
"Why is loving you so easy?"
"I could ask you the same question, Miss Anastasia Rose Steel. Are you getting nervous about the wedding?"
"No, I'm taking it in stride, like I do most things connected to you. Where would I be without bodyguards, Caroline Acton, and my beloved CEO control freak?
"And where would I be without my smart mouth, defying, and extremely sexy fiancée?"
"You think I'm sexy?"
Christian almost dropped his glass of white wine. "You're sexy! I kept telling you about all the men who want you and, yet, you couldn't see it. Now you are climbing high on your sexual experiences, and everyone notices. Most people say you are growing up or have become more glamorous but, honey, it's all about your sex appeal."
"I don't know what to say except that I never thought about it that way."
She stared out on the city in her new Cartier sunglasses, took another sip of her drink, and held Christian's hand. It was a perfect ending to a very tiring day.
CHAPTER - 8
Friday July 22, 2011 – Ana arrived at Dr. Flynn's office, knowing full well that Christian was inside, but confirmed it with Addie. She was polite, even introducing herself before barging through the door. John and Christian looked at each other, then John said, "Ana, come join us." Addie came to the door and John nodded at her, indicating it was okay as she closed the door; Addie was like a bulldog with John's private sessions.
She marched over and pulled out her iPod and speakers then it started to play. "Christian, I want to know what this file is that you put on my iPad. Through some miracle or by devil worship, I found the damn file named, When you went away."
Christian heard the music and tears starting flowing from his eyes. She had never seen his pain like this, so raw and real, burning her anger away. Ana went to him and said, "Tell me what this means, Christian, we are getting married in eight days. Please tell me."
Christian was sobbing and pointed to John.
Ana sat opposite Christian on the green couch, she waited while he was trying to gain his composure.
"Are you sure you want me tell her." John asked.
Christian lifted his head and nodded. Ana just knotted her fingers in her lap, hoping she would not have to look at either of them. She knew how bad this could be since the only time she had seen him cry was the night he told her he was a sadist.
"Fuck… someone say something. I know it's bad and I've told you, Christian, I'll never leave you. But you're crying, and my heart is being ripped out of my chest." While tears were running down her cheeks.
"I didn't want to share my pain with you. How could I? I had just beaten the shit out of you and you walked out on me. How did I know that I was ever going to see you again? Our relationship was brief and so very intense; I thought it was too much for you. But it turned out to be too much for me."
John sat there watching how they interacted with each other.
"Anastasia, on that Saturday, June 4, I thought I was okay. Others had left me, some for the same reason, and I thought I could just go on. That night I went to the Seattle Art Museum Annual Fundraiser; that was supposed to be our coming out party. I was going to introduce you to my other world. I sat next to an empty chair and, by the time I left, I was so lonely and broken hearted, drinking gin and tonic. Elena called when I got home at eleven, and she tried to soothe my wounded ego, but all she did was tell me it was for the best, because you weren't meant to be my submissive."
He took a drink of water and wiped his eyes with a tissue from the box that separated them on the table. Ana was about to speak, but he held up his hand to say stop.
"I went to the liquor cabinet and make myself another gin and tonic. Then I went searching for music on the radio and heard this song, Beautiful Homes, and I melted. I wanted you in that moment, and I went online and downloaded the entire album from San Francisco days San Francisco nights, that includes New Girl by Chris Isaak. I listened to the songs until I sent an email on Wednesday. The songs say it all."
He stopped talking and started to cry again. Ana had her own tears, remembering the pain she had gone through. Finally she wiped a tear and said, "That's fucking all, Christian; do you know how much pain and confusion I was in? I hated you, and I loved you, and I could not live without you. I couldn't give you what you wanted and still be me. But I couldn't live without you. There must be more to this story than these damn songs that have ripped out my heart since I've listened to them. Talk to me, Christian. I need to know before I come over there and beat the shit out of you. Talk to me, Christian," she screamed at the top of lungs.
John had never seen Christian cower and, after what seemed like an eternity, he spoke.
"I forgot about the tonic and started drinking the gin from the bottle. It was impressive to watch the great Christian Grey dancing around the great room singing, 'sorry for the things I said, sorry for the things I did, and sorry that I ever made you cry'. Then I thought, if you could take a beating, so could I. I made it to the foyer."
Ana was literally grabbing the pillow and wringing it with her fingers while John looked on. He was looking in on such a private moment, that he actually felt uncomfortable.
"I broke the gin bottle on the marble floor of the foyer. I climbed my way up to the playroom where, earlier that day, I had beat you for wanting you to be something that you couldn't. I hated you leaving me, and I hated myself for crushing you. I found the belt, took off my shirt, and then started to whip myself. I could see your tear stained face, as I would lift the belt, slashing it into my back. I have no idea how long I had been beating myself when Taylor found me and grabbed the belt. My God, was I fucking out of my mind? I have never known that kind of pain."
She almost choked saying, "You flogged yourself over me?"
"Yes, I wanted the pain of hurting you to go away."
"Why didn't you call or come for me?" She asked.
"Taylor told me to give you space to figure out what you wanted."
"What I wanted was you, but I was too confused to call. When did you call Dr. Flynn?"
"I sent him a text in my drunken stupor, something like I beat you and you fucking left. He came on Sunday morning, after Taylor had taken me to bed in the middle of the night and stayed with me. He sat in the same chair that I always pulled up to watch you sleep. Ana, I never wanted you to know how much pain I was in, but I also didn't ever want to tell you."
"Then, when you agreed to go with me down to Portland, it gave my life purpose. I'd been lost in the wilderness of pain for five days and you suddenly were there with a flashlight showing me the way. I picked you up, and I saw how you looked after losing all that weight, and I knew how much pain you were in. My heart broke all over again. After you agreed to be with me without rules, regulations, or devices, and fell asleep in my lap, I cried into your hair. Ana, I love you. I know that I can make you angry. I know I can be a bully, but I can't live without you."
She got up and went to him. She kissed his tears and he did the same thing. John left the room. Ana crawled onto his lap and looked into his tear-stained face; this was her lost boy. This was the man she was going to say "I do" to in eight days. This was her happily ever after. They kissed and held each other. All words had been spoken, while Chris Isaak serenaded them in the background.
John was surprised when Taylor showed up. "Its okay; that night is over and done. Ana knows and Christian told her. It was the most emotionally wrenching scene I've witnessed. They are remarkable people, Jason."
"She has healed him?"
"I don't think the bad times have gone for good, but the wedding will be one hell of a celebration. You're going to take Gail?"
"I was surprised by the invitation. I was already going as security, but they were thoughtful enough to include Gail. It will be our coming out so to speak. She has agreed to go to London with me. I know I'll be working, but we can spend our nights together. When things calm down around Mr. Grey, I'm going ask Gail to marry me."
"Well, let me be the first to congratulate you. I have always thought highly of you for your caring nature with Christian, and then with Leila. I'll see if they are ready to go."
John walked back into his office to find them locked in an embrace. "I know it's only eight days, and you have no intention of waiting until the honeymoon to have sex, so please take it out of my office and up to the penthouse. Are you both all right?"
"First, I owe you an apology, Dr. Flynn, for barging in the way I did. But I didn't think I would get it out of Christian. He can be so closed off at times. I have something to say, and I want you to hear it so you can remind him when he gets mad at me. When we left José's gallery opening and went to find a restaurant, Christian pulled me into an alley and kissed me like his life depended on it. Now I understand why. But what he doesn't understand is that I would have fucked him in the filthy alley just to have him. I know myself so much better now. Thank you."
"Well, John, how many alleys are there between here and the Escala?" Christian smiled like the adolescent boy that he could still be. "I never felt that I could cry all those tears and actually feel better. See you next week. Come on, Baby, we need to go alley hopping."
From: Christian Grey
Subject: Remember tonight.
Date: July 27 2011 11:10
To: Anastasia Steel
I know you are busy so just a quick reminder that tonight is dinner at my parents' house.
Thank you for being such a good sport with my parents.
You're the best.
Only three more days until our big day!
Christian Grey
CEO Grey Enterprise Holdings, Inc
From: Anastasia Steel
Subject: How could I?
Date: July 27 2011 11:14
To: Christian Grey
How could I forget with you reminding me every five seconds? Anyway, even if I did forget, you or Taylor or Sawyer would be driving me. I almost feel like I'm living in the Bellevue house at Lake Washington, instead of the penthouse, since I'm spending so much time there.
Will I forget to drive?
Why are weddings such big deals anyway?
Faithful and forever
Anastasia Steel
Editor, Seattle Independent Press
When Ana walked out of SIP, she foundChristian waiting outside the car. This was odd because he always waited inside. Christian grabbed Ana kissed her long and passionately, something he never did in public. When he let her go he said, "I was practicing for the big day. Was that embarrassing to you?"
"I don't think you need any practice, at least, you didn't at the Heathman Hotel."
"I have never wanted anybody so much in my life as I wanted you that morning. I saw you sleep, Ana, and I fell more in love. I only knew one way to think then, and how you've forever changed me. It's a miracle? Please get in."
"Christian, I just wanted you, and I've only wanted you. When you kissed me the first time," she whispered in his ear as the car drove on, "I had not had an orgasm, but I think you gave me one in the elevator. You were so strong and beautiful and I could not believe you wanted me. I was a nobody! Don't freak out on me. I mean I hadn't made my mark on life, and yet maybe I haven't, but now I feel like I'm trying. What I mean to say is, you can take me back to the Heathman Hotel and kiss me in that elevator anytime."
Christian undid her seatbelt and pulled her into his lap kissing her for miles. They were necking, something Ana always wanted to do. Their peacefulness came to a halt when they arrived at the Greys' house. Christian helped Ana out of the car. He opened the door to his parents' house and the two of them walked through like they lived there. Everyone was in the living room. There was Ray, Ana's stepfather, and her mother Carla with her current husband Bob, along with Mia and Ethan, and Grace and Carrick. Ana looked around at Christian, and he had the biggest smile, with his gray eyes dancing with joy.
"I knew you would be here at the wedding, but you're here now. Why are you here?"
Mia could not contain her joy as Ana was hugging her family. "We're having a party tonight."
Christian sat down and then pulled Ana down onto his lap after she had hugged her mom. "Every good soon-to-be-bride deserves a bridal shower. You, my lovely girl, are no exception."
Ana buried her face in his neck out of embarrassment. "You're the most perfect man, thank you." She had no shame and kissed him to the point of embarrassment. He loved it when he broke it off. Christian carried her into the kitchen.
"You need to eat I don't want you to have a hangover. I do remember the bar scene, and don't want it repeated in my mother's azaleas. But if you had not drunk dialed me we might not be getting married."
The kitchen counter was full of food. She got a plate of what appeared to be beautiful delicacy and joined the conversation in the living room. She said, "Who cooked the food? It's beyond exquisite."
"Thank you," Mia said, "I thought I would put all of my French cooking classes to use."
"You will have to give me lessons because Christina will fall in love with this," Ana said as she offered Christian a bite and he smiled in agreement.
Slowly guests arrived. Three women from Grey Enterprises showed up: Ros with her curly red mop, Christian's operation manager and her bubbly blonde partner, Gwen, and Andrea the sleek blonde who showed Ana into his office when she stumbled, Christian's personal assistant. The presents were stacked in the living room. Lily, Mia's scowly friend, showed up with all smiles and stared at Christian until Mia nudged her in the ribs. Elliot and Kate showed up only to embarrass themselves by not keeping their hands off each other. Ana thought it was love instead of fun and games. The last to arrive were Claire and Elizabeth from SIP. They both could keep secrets when she thought about their conversations over the last few days, with both of them dropping hints, but never giving anything away.
Suddenly the men left the living room for the den so the ladies could have their own party. Mia was the perfect hostess. She had such ease and charm that Ana thought she should open her own restaurant, but didn't know how hard Mia wanted to work. Ana tried to remain calm, but the thought of playing silly games would be too much. She was still back necking with Christian in the SUV.
Ana's phone rang and she answered her BlackBerry. "Hi, Ana, this Rhian, John's wife; we were supposed to be there, but Colin, our oldest, has come down with a stomach flu. We do apologize and will definitely be at the wedding on Saturday. I'll make sure you get your bridal gift then."
Ana stood up and went to the kitchen. "Thank you for the call. I hope Colin feels better real soon. When I return from parts unknown in the world, let's do lunch. Since our husbands are good friends, we should be too."
"I would like that for my pool of friends is pretty limited."
"Mine too. Thanks for the call. See you Saturday."
Just as she hung up she got another call. "Hello, José."
"Ana, I'm coming up early on Friday. I need to scout out the wedding site for possible shots. Can I stay at Christian's?"
"My mom, her husband, and Ray are here now, and I don't know where they are staying. I'll call tomorrow and let you know. If not, we'll put you up in a hotel. But if I know you, you will want to be where the action is. Now I need to go because Mia is throwing me a surprise bridal shower, and she is staring at me right now to get back to the guests. Laters."
"Mia, I'm sorry Rhian called to say she can't make it, and then José said he is coming on Friday morning." Ana threw up her hands in exasperation.
They walked hand in hand into the living room. The women were getting to know each other; some were drinking, some were eating, and everyone looked happy when she joined them again.
The fun part was opening the gifts. There was plenty of lingerie, crotch-less and eatable panties, a pair of handcuffs with fur attached, some gel to make the body hot, but her favorite was a gift card to an ice cream store. She remembered fondly Christian eating vanilla ice cream off her body. Her mother gave her a lace robe that she had made out of her grandmother's wedding dress. Carla was a talented seamstress. Ana had always thought her grandmother's wedding dress was ugly, but the short robe was sleek, beautiful, and sexy.
The men joined them for coffee and dessert. Christian picked up the handcuffs and whispered, "Shall we give these a try when we get home?" Ana blushed scarlet. Carla just looked at her daughter, happy and being loved by such a beautiful man. She thought that they would make beautiful babies together, not that she was in a hurry to be a grandmother.
When Christian and Ana had a moment together, she said, "Where is everybody staying?"
"I don't want anybody at the penthouse. They are all staying at the Olympic Fairmont Hotel. Why?"
"José is coming in Friday morning and wanted to stay with us."
"I'll call and let him know. I've never had so many details to take care of. When are we going to write our vows," Christian asked.
Ana's eyes bugged out, "Christian, won't I do, do? It just seems like another added burden. I still have to pack for the honeymoon. You told me to pack like we're staying home; does that mean we're staying at the penthouse for three weeks?"
"Ana, I'm not going to tell you, other than the days may range from warm to hot, and nights may be chilly. You will need a few formal dresses, but that's it."
Carrick came into the kitchen where they had been hiding. "You need to say goodbye to your guests. Only a few more days, and then you'll be alone without any interruptions."
Christian and Ana walked to the front door hand in hand, thanking people. Carla, Bob, and Ray had their own bodyguards to take them to the hotel. Carla said, "We're sightseeing tomorrow, something your husband-to-be has arranged and I'll talk to you tomorrow night. The rehearsal dinner is at the penthouse Friday night. We'll see you there. I love you, talk soon." Hugs and kisses, then they were off.
Mia came and hugged them both. Ana said, "You're the best sister-in-law and one who has many beautiful talents. When your day comes in a few years, I'll be the one giving you a bridal shower."
"Ana, you're much more mature than I am. I'm still a carefree girl while you, who are only a few months older, are taking on the responsibility of my brother and a household, while holding down a full-time job. You're an amazing woman and lucky enough to snatch my brother."
Christian kissed his sister on the cheek and said, "You're growing up to Mia. I never realized how truly kind and talented you are. We need to talk about the future after our honeymoon. Thank you for all this." Then he hugged her, something that was new to both of them.
Thursday night. The battle of the wedding vows took place after Ana had hung up from Carla. Christian grew more impatient the longer she was on the phone. They're shouting, pouting, and slamming doors until the two of them hashed out what they would say in front of their wedding guests. Finally Christian stormed off to his office and closed the door, something Ana had not seen.
It was all over the word OBEY. Finally, when he did not come out by eleven, she went to the bedroom, took off her clothes, put on a satin powder-blue robe with her powder-blue suede shoes, which were now her favorite. She marched into his office, opening the door, dropping her robe, and walked in closing the door behind her. Christian's mouth flew open, and he hung up the phone without as much as a good-bye to whoever was on the other end.
"Two days, and you are acting like an ass. You're acting like the Christian Grey before I walked out on you." He started to stand up, and she held up her hand for him to stop. "I will not mouth, utter or, make reference to obeying you. We are equals and, when we leave on our honeymoon, we…will…be…equals. I left you because I could not sign a contract that said I had to obey you." She said with her powder-blue-eyes flashing red.
Christian was looking at her body in full blown lust. "Stop it, Christian," she frowned. "I want to get this out, because I have just about had it with your selfish and childish ways." He took his eyes off her pubic hair and looked at her face.
"I couldn't be your submissive. I can be your wife, but you have to respect me for who I am. I know you're older and sometimes wiser, but I will not now or ever obey you; do you understand," she shouted
He smiled at her and said, "Yes, I understand, but why did you come in here naked?"
She grinned and said, "I knew that I would have your full and complete attention."
"I must admit, Miss Steel, it's an effective tool in your arsenal. Now if you have said your piece, I would like to read to you what I wrote. You can continue to stand or come over here and sit on my lap."
Ana opened the door, grabbed her robe, and sat across the desk from him. She had been naked and eye-fucked by him quite enough. He started to read.
"I give you my solemn vow to be a faithful partner in sickness and health, to stand by your side in good times and in bad, to share your joys as well as your sorrows. I promise to love you unconditionally, to support your goals and dreams, to honor and respect you, to laugh with you and cry with you, to share my hopes and dreams with you, and bring you solace in times of need. And to cherish you for as long as we both shall live. I solemnly vow I will safeguard and hold dear and deep in my heart our union and you. I promise to love you faithfully, forsaking all others, through the good times and the bad, in sickness and health, regardless of where life takes us. I will protect you, trust you, and respect you. I will share your joys and sorrows and comfort you in times of need. I promise to cherish you and uphold your hopes and dreams and keep you safe at my side. All that is mine is yours. I give my hand, my heart, and my love from this moment on for as long as we both shall live."
He stopped talking and looked up with tears in his gray eyes.
She got up and went to his lap. "Those were the most beautiful words. I think we can do a little clean up and have beautiful vows. Where is the word OBEY?"
He held her tight and smelled her hair. "You know me; I want everything to be neat and orderly, but life is not like that, and you are not like that. You know I'm a control freak, and I knew that sooner or later you would make a dramatic entrance. I do like your dramatic entrances. I can remember talking with Flynn about how you probably weren't submissive material. I can't believe I always revert to my old self, even though I've changed. I love you, my dear Anastasia. You will not obey me, even if your life is in danger."
"Now that tonight's drama is over, let's do some editing,"
"I promise to love you unconditionally, to support your goals and dreams, to honor and respect you, to laugh with you and cry with you, to share my hopes and dreams with you, and bring you solace in times of need. I give you my solemn vow to be a faithful partner in sickness and health, to stand by your side in good times and in bad, to share your joys as well as your sorrows. I vow I will safeguard and hold dear and deep in my heart our union and you. I promise to love you faithfully, forsaking all others, regardless of where life takes us. I will protect you, trust you, and respect you. I promise to cherish you and uphold your hopes and dreams and keep you safe at my side. All that is mine is yours. I give my hand, my heart, and my love from this moment on for as long as we both shall live."
"I think those few changes make it flow better. You are really a good writer, Christian."
"And you, my love, are a better editor. Now that it's late, can I take that robe off and use your body?"
She got off his lap and pulled him up. He leaned over and shut down his computer. As she pulled away from the desk, she said, "There is a catch to you using my body. You need to sleep the night with me. You don't get enough sleep, and I want you fit for our honeymoon."
"Well, if you put it like that, I'm more than willing to cooperate."
From: Christian Grey
Subject: Wedding vows
Date: July 29 2011 10:10
To: John Flynn
Could you tell me whoever invented writing your own wedding vows? I would like to kick him in the proper place. Last night, we had so much upheaval at the penthouse about the word, obey. I should have remembered the battle royal that we had over Ana becoming my submissive which, if you want to remind me, she didn't agree to it, just like last night and, when you hear the vows tomorrow, there'll be no obey in them.
My wife or soon-to-be-wife can hold her own with me. I must admit great fights lead to great make up sex.
How does she always get her way?
I love that woman, but how have men lived with women for years? I was not angry at her, but I sure as hell raised my voice a lot.
Just wanted you to know that I can sound and act like any other man. I know you are laughing your ass off reading this and wanted to add joy to your life.
Christian Grey
CEO Grey Enterprise Holdings, Inc
From: Dr. John Flynn
Subject: Laughing my Ass OFF
Date: July 29 2011 13:14
To: Christian Grey
Wow I'm howling and rolling on the ground. I think you have joined the human race today. Just think of all of us little men who have put up with our wives every day. Didn't you tell me that you love Anastasia's smart mouth? After tomorrow, you will have to live with it for better or worse.
Thanks for giving your shrink a lift in a rather boring day. As a matter of fact, the next three weeks are going to be rather boring with you out of town on your honeymoon.
See you tomorrow, and see if you try to slip the word obey into your vows.
John
Christian picked up Ana a little late from work, and it took Taylor three trips with the SUV, because SIP had held its own wedding shower for Ana. She had a box of manuscripts that she was taking with her on the honeymoon - after all she knew Christian wasn't going to be isolated from his work at GEH. She changed into her pale pink halter dress and pink diamonds that Christian had delivered before the Space Needle dinner.
Gail had gone all out on the rehearsal dinner. Ana walked out to find the dining room table had been transformed into a wonderland of gleaming crystal and china. She picked up the ivory china, and each dish had Christian and Anastasia Grey July 30, 2011, written on it in silver with pale pink roses around the edge. When he came into the great room, she rushed up to him. He was wearing his dark grey suit and her favorite tie. She had very fond memories of that gray tie; when they first had sex, he would use the tie so she could not touch him. Look how far they had come now she could now touch him all the time. Ana wondered if she should slip it into her suitcase for the honeymoon.
She kissed him with passion. "Like the tie. You're the best man ever. How did you find time to have hand painted china made?"
"I stayed up several nights doing it myself," he smirked.
Just then the elevator door started to open. Grace and Carrick got off first, followed by Carla with Bob on one side and Ray on the other. Then Elliot and Kate, followed by Mia and Ethan; the last out of the elevator was José carrying his cameras.
"I told you that I should have been first to get off the elevator, so I could take your pictures in all your finery."
Grace said, "We don't need every second of our lives documented - candid shots are better anyway, José."
"Dr. Trevelyan, I just want to do a good job. This is my first wedding, and the bride is such a dear friend of mine."
Ana stepped in to his view, and his mouth dropped open. "Ana, stop; I want to get a picture of the most beautiful woman I know. Tomorrow you won't look any better than you do right now." Christian came up and put his arms around her waist and smelled her hair as José clicked away. Gail and Jason came out with Bollinger for their guests, pink champagne to go with a very pink mood.
After a very fine meal, Christian gave Ana's parents a tour of the penthouse, discreetly avoiding the playroom. Carla came back as Ana was headed out of to the kitchen. "I knew Christian was rich even reading about him online is enough to give you a headache - but this, my dear, this is over the top, and your new house will be too."
"Did you see the new house," Ana asked.
"On our tour of Seattle yesterday, arranged skillfully by your soon-to-be husband; I couldn't believe there was so much of Seattle that I'd never been to before." Then she looked over at Grace and said, "We were even taken to The Grace - what a spectacular boat!"
Grace joined the conversation and, as the three women were talking, José was clicking away. He captured the Grey brothers bantering with each other and a candid shot of Elliot touching Kate's arm as they were cuddled in conversation, and one of José best, Mia pouting at Ethan. He wandered into the kitchen for a glass of water, only to find Gail and Taylor in an embrace. He backed up, trying to be as discreet as possible, while snapping away. By eleven, everyone was headed out the door.
Gail was still in the kitchen when Ana came in. "Thank you, it was a wonderful dinner, Mrs. Jones; your pork roast was exquisite. I hope you have a nice time off next week. You deserve it with all that Christian and I have put you through. I hope I have treated you with respect. You know…this is all new to me."
"Miss Steel, and tomorrow Mrs. Grey, (Ana smiled) you're just what this place needs. You brighten this place up with your smile and your beauty. I look forward to a long and happy employment with the Greys. Tonight you looked just stunning, but tomorrow your ivory off-the-shoulder wedding dress, covered in fine lace, will be wonderful. Mrs. Kavanagh has done a grand job. I just have to say that the way you have handled Mr. Grey is admirable. He seems to be happier than I've ever seen him in the four years I have worked for him."
Christian strolled into the kitchen in his bare feet that have always been a turn-on for Ana. "What are you ladies talking about?"
Ana said, "I was thanking Mrs. Jones for the great rehearsal dinner, but we did not rehearse. Tomorrow is another day. Good night, Mrs. Jones, and is it okay to sleep with the man I will marry tomorrow?"
"With weddings, there are so many old wives' tales. You have slept together from the very beginning, why should you break with tradition now?"
Christian smiled and thanked her, taking Ana to bed. He undid her dress, and she stepped out in nothing but pink panties, now it was his favorite dress. She was not even wearing stockings. He picked up the beautiful dress, placing it carefully on the chair. Ana was on the toilet when he came in to brush his teeth. She had just recently allowed him to see her on the toilet, even though all he could see were her feet. She joined him in the same task and then washed her face. When she was dry, he rubbed cream into her face, another thing Christian loved to do.
"Christian, tomorrow I'm yours, well no, I'm already yours. My heart is full. You were so kind to all of our families this evening. I even include José in there. Don't spoil the moment by telling me he wants me."
She grabbed his hand and walked to bed. "Can I say thank you the only way I know how to say it best?"
He looked at her quizzically.
She pushed the duvet cover to one side, and then got onto the bed on all fours. She was looking at the headboard, and then looked back at him with a salacious grin. He slowly took his clothes off, deliberately slowly. She got tired of waiting for him, so she jumped off the bed to help him remove his pants. He snaked his arms around her and said, "My impatient bride-to-be, you know slow is so much better. I've held my impatience in check all night; I do remember when you wore this dress before you had on no panties. If I recall, you were in a hurry too." He pushed her on the bed making her wait for him again. "I've been watching you flirt and flit around, paying no attention to me. So wait or play with yourself; it's all good to me."
She pouted, but his making her wait only built her desire for him more. Finally, after strutting around the room like a grand peacock, he glissades onto the bed. She was lying on her stomach, and soon his hands were on her skin as he kissed her from her neck to her ass, all the way down her spine. Finally turning her over, his hands continued their assault on her front. He sat up and kissed her breasts, giving them butterfly kisses as she squirmed. He did not care if she squirmed, for he learned last night that she was not going to obey, or at least not tonight.
"What do you want me to do to you, Anastasia," He said in his low sexy voice.
"My breasts…"
He kissed and sucked them and then, when her nipples were elongated, his tongue went to work making circles and then he would gently bite as she squirmed more. She rolled over and got on all fours again. He crawled behind her, then placed his hands on her ass and kneaded her cheeks hard.
Ana groaned, and still he had not entered her. She moved back against him, feeling his erection, and yet he did not enter. He started giving her butterfly kisses on her butt, and she swayed and moaned against him. Still Christian did not enter, and then he lowered himself between her legs, giving her clitoris butterfly kisses and blew his hot breath across her. She went into a full glorious orgasm. He slid out of the way, and then once again was behind her. He could not wait and lifted her legs to the kneeling position, and shoved his penis inside her. She groaned as he clasped her hips, shoving deeper inside her. His pace was frantic, and he wanted to crawl inside her.
She had just had one orgasm and now, with him inside her, she could feel her body start to climb and build, not caring about him for her needs seemed to always come first. Suddenly he moved his hands from her hips to her breasts; he pinched hard on her nipples, and she yelled. He was shoving now with all of his might, and his fingers ensnared her nipples, and he said. "Please, give it up to me, Ana." On command, as always, her knees quivered, and she could not hold her body up any more and fell to earth, after being too close to the sun; with his last pump, he fell on top of her. He finally regained his awareness and lifted his body weight onto his elbows. After he was soft, he rolled over.
He licked her breasts softly once she rolled over.
"Was the wait worth it?"
"As always…you never disappoint, soon-to-be-husband. How can you always come up with new ways for me to feel special? You have never pinched my breasts that hard. It was a shock and painful, but boy was that good."
"Ana, I had no master plan like I do in the playroom sometimes, but at times your body just tells me what to do. I know how responsive you can be, and I've learned to read your body."
He finally kissed her; she had been waiting all evening to feel his tongue rolling and wandering in her mouth. She had her hand on his chest and playfully wandered around his chest hairs. She could feel him growing again as she crossed her leg over his. Round two was underway.
When she looked at the clock, it was two in the morning. She stretched and turned off the light. Once the light was off, she looked at Christian holding her and said gently, "It's our Wedding Day."