Smoke & Fire.
"Jonny did what?!"
"Jac, it's okay."
"Where is he, AAU?"
"I don't.."
"What the hell happened? Who did you speak to?"
Mo had imparted the information to her boss with trepidation, but she had no idea she'd be provoking this reaction. She's reeling from the news herself, heart hammering in her chest, but she finds herself occupied instead by Jac Naylor's panic. She guides the consultant forcefully into a chair at the Nurses' station, noting her ghostly pallor and fearing for her sizeable bump. To the ward staff their 38 week pregnant boss is akin to a time bomb, and they fear her bouts of rage can only be a catalyst to the impending birth.
ooooo
"Are you okay?" He's plodding back towards consciousness when he hears the decided whisper. Her voice. He smiles as he opens his eyes. Jac is inches from his face, her hand in his, keeping vigil at his bedside. He pulls the oxygen mark away from his mouth to speak.
"Mm Hm. Yep. Yeah."
"Good. Because I will bloody well kill you!" He closes his eyes again as she starts yelling, trying to block out the theatrical temper tantrum and thinking instead of the fireman and the sweet, kind paramedic who had dragged him from the burning flat.
"Not now Jac." He croaks the words with barely any conviction at all, so he's surprised when they silence her. He opens his eyes again as he feels her pull herself up to sit on his bed. The exertion has tired her out and she's pouting at him now, trying to cover for that notorious fear behind her eyes.
"What the hell were you thinking, Jonny? What moron runs into a burning flat? When the loud ringing noise goes off in your building they're kinda hoping you'll leave."
"I was trying to save a life."
"Well, you didn't. The fire officers did. They have all this fancy equipment, see, so they don't pass out as soon as they get a lungful of smoke. You could have been asphyxiated." The last few words are a whisper, and he wants to say he's sorry, but she's already reaching for his right hand. She twists around so her body's facing him and places his hand firmly against the bump.
"Okay Jonny Mac, here's the thing." He knows better than to interrupt her, especially in a rare moment when she's using Mo's affectionate name for him. "We both know that I can do all of this by myself with my eyes closed." She gestures towards the bump he's now rubbing fondly. "That said, I happen to think it's quite important that a child has all the support it can get." He stays mute, this is certainly news to him. "That means two parents. That means somebody always being there. If something ever happened, to either of us, I need to know that she has, you know, a backup."
"She?"
"Yes, she." Jac berates herself for letting it slip out, convinced he's missed the point now. "And, well?" He's grinning up at her like an idiot.
"I get it. It's natural, you know."
"What is?"
"You want more for her than you had. I want that too." He whispers the last bit conspiratorially.
"Well, you could have fooled me." She leans towards him, fixing him with an icy glare.
"Okay, no more playing hero."
"No more playing reckless idiot. Especially not for that fat chain smoking neighbour who let her scrawny little dog pee up my bike that time."
"Mrs McKinnie's from Glasgow!"
"Exactly." She gets the last word in as Sacha joins them.
"Hey, how's the patient doing?"
"He'll live." She states softly, moving her hands from her stomach to place the oxygen mask back on his face.
"Jonny, much pain? Shortness of breath?"
"I'm fine. Big gaping hole in my pride, otherwise all good."
"Right." The registrar chuckles. "Well, we'd like to monitor you overnight, but assuming all is fine you should be fit to go in the morning." He turns his attention to his friend. "And you, how long now? You're huge!" Both of his hands snake instinctively to her bump.
"Oh for god's sake Sacha, do you have to do that every time?" She slaps him away with a playful frown.
"Okay, I surrender! I'll leave you be!" He holds his hands up as he backs off, heading over to his next patient.
"I should probably get back too. Let Mo know you're okay so she'll stop flapping." He smiles at the image, knowing full well that of the two women it was Jac that would have freaked when they heard the news.
Jac pushes herself resolutely off the bed, but stumbles back to grab the rail as a wave of dizziness and nausea overcomes her. All of a sudden her legs lose the ability to support her and before she can get a firm grasp on the bed she finds herself sat in a heap on the floor.
"Damnit."
"Sacha! Argh." Jonny panics. He's helpless as she falls, reaching out and shouting instinctively but pinned back to the bed by the thousands of tiny daggers in his chest. Fortunately Dr Levy is back at her side in a flash.
"What happened?" He drags her left arm around his shoulders and helps her up into a chair produced by a nearby nurse.
"Nothing, I'm fine. I felt a bit faint that's all."
"Well, I'm getting you checked out. Who's your Obstetrician?"
"Thompson." She utters begrudgingly as he wheels her towards the lift, feeling Jonny's wild eyes burning into the back of her head.
ooooo
"Sacha, this is a huge overreaction, you know that right?"
"Well, I don't see you running away. A once over won't hurt." He's taking a blood sample as he speaks, in advance of Mr T's appearance. "Right, urine next." She rolls her eyes. "Jac your BP's 130/85, so, urine sample please." He hands her the pot and leaves her to it. "I'm going to track down that Consultant." She smiles in spite of herself.
"Shouldn't you be getting back to the ward?" She calls after him, glad the answer's no.
ooooo
"Ms Naylor!" She opens her eyes with a start, slightly disorientated and finding Mr Thompson's face looming above her. "How're you feeling?"
"Uh, fell asleep. Where's Sacha?"
"Dr Wilde needed him on AAU. He said he'll be back." Her Consultant is grinning at her like a nervy F1, and she has an increasing urge to throw things at him, not helped by a pounding headache. "So, Dr Levy said something about a faint?"
"I didn't faint, I just had a moment. He whisked me down here before I could stop him. This is stupid, I'm going back up to Darwin."
"No you don't," He flicks through the notes as he speaks, "Hypertension. Just stay down here until we get the urine and bloods back. Please?" She raises an eyebrow, eternally unimpressed by his lack of conviction.
"Fine." It sounds a lot less confident than she hoped it would, and she leans back against the pillows with a sigh.
"Jac, are you sure you're not in pain?" The concern in his voice suggests she looks as drained as she feels.
"Just a bit uncomfortable. I assume that goes with the territory." She wriggles lethargically and he presses a hand firmly to her abdomen, just above the bump, causing her to yelp.
"Right, discomfort. Headache?" She shrugs.
"I'm dehydrated."
"Nurse?" A girl Jac doesn't recognise puts her head around the door. "I want Ms Naylor on IV fluids now please, 15 minute obs and chase the bloods. Keep me informed."
"Yes Mr T." Jac feels the blood rushing in her ears as they speak, dread flooding through her veins.
"You're thinking pre-eclampsia?" She asks.
"I'm thinking, let's keep you monitored and wait for the results. Okay?" She nods, inwardly trying to convince herself that she is.
ooooo
"Where's Jac Naylor?" Jonny leans heavily on the desk at the entrance to maternity, oxygen mask in one hand and saline drip bag slung over his shoulder. He earns a stern set of raised eyebrows from the ward sister.
"Should you be here?"
"Absolutely."
"Hm. She's in the side room." She directs him across the ward and he grasps his chest, taking a deep breath and standing up straight, before heading inside.
"Hey Naylor, you trying to steal my thunder?" She pushes herself up against the pillows as he enters, and he can't deny his surprise at how pale and tired she looks. "How you doing?" He asks more softly.
"Shouldn't you be on AAU?"
"Nah, I'm good." He hangs his own drip up on the same hook as hers, and she can't help but smile as he takes a seat on the bed, mirroring her earlier action. "Besides, I convinced Sacha to drug me up to the eyeballs so I could make it down here. He said Mr T admitted you, so, I didn't want to miss anything." All of a sudden the kindness is overwhelming, and she curses her hormones as tears start to make defiant tracks down her cheeks. She brings a hand up to her throbbing head.
Jonny's stomach flips as she sinks down into the pillows, letting out a low moan and clutching her head as the ECG monitor goes wild.
"Hey, I need some help in here!" He splutters through the exclamation as the Consultant appears on the scene with two nurses, manhandling him out of the way.
"Holly, get me a vial of Magnesium sulphate IV. BP's through the roof, let's get her to theatre. Now." She yelps in pain again, more loudly this time, and he makes to follow them down the corridor but the ward sister holds him firmly by the shoulders.
"Come on, sit. There's nothing you can do in there at the moment, and collapsing on my ward won't help anyone."
"She was fine earlier!"
ooooo
Jac's acutely aware of movement, if nothing else. The trundle of trolley wheels on linoleum cuts through her skull like glass. The throbbing in her ears makes her gasp for breath, wishing her head would get on with it and explode. Then there's the movement inside her, the way her baby is pushing out against her stomach more violently than ever before, and she knows instinctively that it's distressed. She's in tears by the time they reach theatre, and it feels like hundreds of pairs of hands are pushing her flat, getting another line in, pressing a mask to her face that feels like it'll suffocate her. She gasps again, and then nothing.
ooooo
Mo Effanga peers through the glass in the door to the room she's been directed to, a wry smile creeping onto her face and just a hint of warm tears at the corners of her eyes. Jonny Mac is oblivious to his friend's presence, even as she opens the door and creeps up behind him. He's perched on the edge of a plastic chair but his weight is draped emphatically across the plastic cot, arms almost surrounding it and head on his shoulder, mesmerised by the little girl in front of him.
"Jonny. Hey." He barely flinches.
"Look. Just, look at her. Isn't she the most beautiful thing you've ever seen?" Mo smiles again. What's most beautiful is the innocent connection before her. The fledging relationship between a father and a newborn baby.
"I er, I just came from theatre." She has his attention immediately. "Jac's okay."
"Okay?"
"She's in HDU. Sedated just until the morning."
"Sedated?" Mo sighs. Her friend is drained, still overcoming his own trauma and not necessarily up to dealing with all the gritty details. Still; he needs to know. He's a father now.
"I'm not sure what the nurses have said..."
"Nothing."
"Okay. She had a seizure in the anaesthetics room, and her BP was all over the place when she was under. There were, uh, concerns about a cerebral bleed."
"Oh my god."
"Jonny, she's okay. Vital signs have been good and everything is looking normal now. Mr T's concerned about exhaustion, that's why he's keeping her under. Tomorrow she should be fine." He nods, jaw stiffened, and she can't help but drag him into a hug. "She's strong, eh? The strongest. She'll be okay. She'll be bossing you around tomorrow." She feels him nod against her chest. "Right. So, for tonight, you better come with me."
"Hm?" He looks confused, and in no way willing to be separated from the little human who is diligently staring up at the pair. Mo smiles and hands him a blanket.
"Come on, Mr T's just cleared it. So have Paeds." She puts an arm round his waist, uses the other to steer the cot and leads him in the direction of Jac's private room.
ooooo
"Mo!" She spins around as she reaches the hospital entrance, and Sacha breaks into a jog to catch up with her. "Only just leaving?"
"Well, couldn't really go until I knew they were okay." She shrugs.
"And they are?" There's genuine concern etched on his face and Mo wonders, not for the first time, how he and Jac Naylor came to be friends.
"Yeah, looks like everyone's going to be fine. She had a girl, red hair!"
"Of course! And my patient?"
"Curled up in a chair. I don't suppose his lungs will thank him in the morning." Sacha shrugs.
"Dad's gotta be where Dad's gotta be."
"Ah," Mo smiles, "so you really did dope him up and release him early?"
"Technically he discharged himself." Sacha confirms her analysis with a nod as he speaks.
"So now," she continues, "they're free to bring the little mite into a whole world of crazy dysfunction." Sacha chuckles, but gives the registrar a knowing smile.
"You know, I think they'll be just fine. Night, Mo."
"If you say so! See you tomorrow."
ooooo
Jac opens her eyes with a start, squinting against the bright light. She has that horrible, foreboding feeling in her gut that you'd normally associate with a hangover. In an instant she knows what's happened, and she's straining to peer anxiously around the room, blinking against the impossibly white decor. She coughs, her throat dry, and mercifully there's movement to her left. Jonny looks groggy and tired, but he's grinning at her even as he wakes. She thinks she might cry with relief as her eyes settle on the cot that he's now rolling to her bedside.
"Hey, it's okay, she's here." He sounds as rough as she feels.
"Let me see." She doesn't sound as firm as usual, more pleading as she pushes herself into a sitting position despite the pain in her abdomen. He gathers the bundle in his arms as carefully as she's ever seen him do anything, and transfers her into Jac's grasp. "Oh my god." She gasps, the power of speech almost escaping her completely, overwhelmed by the bond she has with this baby; The instant flood of love and fierce protection that she always feared she wouldn't be capable of.
"Yeah," He agrees with a whisper, "that's what I thought." Then, all of a sudden he wraps an arm around her neck and pulls her into a hug, kissing her hair and earning himself a look of complete confusion, perhaps horror from the mother of his child. He laughs, or cries, she can't quite tell.
"Jonny, what?"
"Last night I was so scared I'd lose you. They were talking about cerebral oedema, and seizures, and I was terrified." She stays mute, reminded acutely of her own fear and blurry recollection of the journey to theatre. She shakes the thought, after all it's her mantra to only ever look forward. "Jac, yesterday you told me you could do this with your eyes closed." She makes a face. "You were just being you. Being defensive."
"Right." She doesn't sound convinced.
"The thing is, you could. Of course you bloody could, you do anything you put your mind to. Whereas I don't even know how, well, how you find out how to change a nappy." It may be a backhanded compliment but she smiles genuinely into the blanket the baby's wrapped in.
"You'll figure it all out."
"You think?"
"You're still here. That'll do for now." He nods appreciatively. "But may I suggest you grow a pair, Maconie?"
"Well," he starts, leaning forward to grasp the hand that stretches inquisitively from the bundle in Jac's arms, "If she's anything like you I'll need to."