I'm forcing myself into this box,
limbs folded, compressed
Origami has nothing on me
"You're so fat."
"You're so ugly."
Wrap this package in sequins and glitter,
in yellowed lace -
your picture-perfect disgrace
"You'll never be pretty."
"You'll never have any friends, let alone a boyfriend or a husband."
"You'll be forever alone."
Wearing me on a wrist,
a charm on a charity-case bracelet;
the world has its way of plying its music,
prying forth the voice for its
machine-driven tunes
Anti-trophy collectors
always hollowed out their space
- and disappeared, leaving no trace
save a raised little tell-tale line
and that mercurial aftertaste
"You're so fat."
"So nasty."
Eat. Guilt. Vomit. Repeat.
(I always had that blood-lust - pour me another drink)
I'm pasting myself into your picture frame,
waist folded and compressed
Self-slaughter will win your interest
Wrap the wrists in gauze and tape
pin the grenade back in place -
picture-perfect in my elegant disgrace
Am I thin enough?
Am I pretty enough?
Am I perfect enough?
Wear myself down,
another apathetic figure on a formulaic assembly line;
the world has its way of distortion,
breeding destruction and declaring it beauty and grace
Trophy collectors rejoice:
another carcass, hollowing out, taking less space
- until she disappears, to the smile on that face,
a whispered affirmation to a porcelain God
as she chokes on societal aftertaste
Another night.
Another meal.
Another 10 pounds.
Never thin enough.
Never pretty enough.
Never perfect enough.
I'll show you how far a violet can shrink
Forever left behind.
Forever forgotten.
Forever alone.
Forever gone.
Across the fields on the outstretched plain
Pearly white clouds form
Painted on the pure blue landscape of sky
After the passing storm
When looking forward you see the light
Giving off an angelic glow
"She was never fat."
"She was always pretty."
While behind you lies dark clouds above
Anger in their eyes doth show
The storm clouds rage with shouts of fury
Flashing lights from them shine through
While the pearly white clouds catch the sun's light
"She was the smartest."
"She was the prettiest."
"She was the perfection everyone wanted to be."
Stretched on the bright color of blue
The dark clouds hiss and scream
And let out tears of pain
For it knows it cannot be as beautiful
As the clouds across the plain
The white clouds shine off a rainbow
"She listened to them."
"Believed every lie they told."
I'm fat.
I'm not pretty.
I'm not perfect.
As an apology to the black clouds
Then suddenly the storm's owner stops its crying
And ceases its loud, painful shouts
"Perfection is what imperfection means."
She wasn't fat.
She was pretty.
The storm gives a bolt of lightning
To sign a pact of forgiveness
Then the two part as friends and leave behind
A light blue sky of emptiness
She was perfect.
She IS perfect.