What up peoplezez

Well, this is my first Kung-Fu Panda story and I expect it to be full of awesomeness. Keep in mind that I'm co-authoring it with Serenity in Virginia so it'll probably be a while before chapters start appearing.

Disclaimer: I don't own Kung-Fu Panda or any likenesses that come from Serenity in Virginia; I do own my characters

Enjoy

Nathan felt like he'd been waiting forever even though he'd only been waiting for Colin to show up for about an hour. He was waiting at the entrance of a fair not too far from his home in Michigan. Colin, who was born and raised in California, was coming over for a while because, according to Colin, he didn't want to spend the next three weeks out in Pittsburgh with his somewhat dysfunctional family. He had apparently checked in to a hotel back at Saginaw yesterday and had given him a call to meet him at the fairgrounds that afternoon. Nathan, whose pulled back brown hair, checkered shirt, jeans, and leather boots were pretty much on par with everyone else, was worried if he was going to pull some sort of trick.

Eventually, the crowd thinned out enough for him to see Colin walking toward him while leading an animal of some sort on a leash. The first thing Nathan noticed about him was that he was a complete opposite of everyone there. Six foot and mid heavy set, his eyes were completely framed by a pair of bug eyed sunglasses that made him look like a giant beetle. His clothes were even more outlandish as they seemed to range from a t-shirt with some of the weirdest designs he'd ever seen to shorts that went from his hips to the middle of his lower legs to worn down black sneakers. The only thing that seemed normal about him was a first place ribbon he had pinned to his shirt.

"Hey Nathan, looked what I won," he said.

"Wow… where'd you get the ribbon?" Nathan asked.

"I got it for winning first prize for breeding the best pig in a competition," Colin said.

"Wait, you breed a pig, dude?" Nathan asked.

"Of course I did," Colin said. "Most genetically perfect pig in the contest".

"Oink." a voice said behind Colin.

Looking down to see the pig, Nathan let out a gasp of shock at what he saw. While the tail and hind legs were still that of a pig, its face and upper torso resembled that of a bodybuilder.

"Oh God-that's the pig you entered Colin?" he gawked.

"Yeah he's something all right." Colin nodded.

"Are those fists?" Nathan asked.

"Sure are," Colin said. "Show him, pig".

Without any prior warning, the pig raised it right hand and punched Nathan in the family jewels, forcing him to drop the funnel cake he had been eating and reach down to massage them. Colin couldn't help but snicker at the predicament his friend was in.

"Colin, how the Hell'd you do this?" Nathan asked once he got back on his feet.

"Wanna know a secret, Nathan?" Colin asked. "I didn't breed this pig. I got it from a farm".

"What kind of farm breeds pigs like these?" Nathan asked.

"You really wanna know?" Colin replied.

"Of course," Nathan said.

"Well prepare yourself Nathan because I doubt you've seen anything like this," Colin said.

At hotel…

After a quick cab ride to the hotel Colin was staying at, Nathan was starting to get upset about what his friend was doing. He was now watching him unlock a vault he was carrying with him. Nathan already wasted enough time with this nonsense. Whatever Colin was going to show him, he suspected it was going to be stupid. Eventually, Colin unlocked the vault and pulled out a remote that had several flashing button on the front.

"Voila Nathan." he said proudly.

"Uh… what is this?" Nathan asked.

"This is how I got the pig, dude," Colin said. "Have you ever heard of the Multiverse theory?"

"Uh… yeah I have, but I'm wondering if you have," Nathan said.

"Oh my God… so transparent," Colin muttered. "Well, the theory states that there are an infinite number of universes along with ours that coexist on parallel dimensional planes".

"Dimensional planes… yeah." Nathan nodded.

"Dude, don't repeat the last two words I said like you kinda already knew what I was talking about," Colin said. "You have no idea what I'm talking about".

"Colin, I know what the theory is," Nathan said. "I'm not an idiot, you know".

"Whatever," Colin said. "Now in each of these alternate universes, the reality is different from our own, sometimes only slightly and sometimes quite radically. The point is every possible eventuality exists".

"And that's how you got the pig?" Nathan asked.

"Prepare yourself Nathan and I'll show you," Colin said.

With that, Colin pressed a few buttons on the remote. A series of bright sparks enveloped them before they disappeared in a bright light. A few moments later the flashing subsided and they now seemed to be standing on a street corner. Looking up, Nathan saw that they seemed to be in a heavily technological city that had everything from floating cars to automated sidewalks.

"Where are we?" Nathan asked.

"This is Saginaw, dude," Colin said "Same year, same time. But in this universe, Christianity never existed, which means the dark ages of scientific repression never occurred, and humanity's about a thousand years more advanced, ergo muscular genetically perfect pigs".

"Wait a minute, how do I know this is another reality and not some sort of trick?" Nathan asked.

"That's a good question," Colin said. "What time is it?"

"I don't know… about 3:30," Nathan guessed.

"Watch the sidewalk," Colin said.

Looking up, Nathan saw Tara, a girl he knew that always ripped on because of the way she looks, was on one of the automated sidewalks across the street, yet she was clearly a lot more attractive here than in the reality they were from.

"Oh my God… is that Tara?" Nathan asked.

"Thirty- six D, dude," Colin said. "And you know what's amazing? In this universe, she's still one of the ugly ones. Trust me dude, if you saw your mom, your penis would shoot right off your body".

"Hey, let me ask you this," Nathan said. "What happened to all the Renaissance art Christianity inspired?"

"That was my first question to," Colin said. "Let's go have a look at the Sistine Chapel Nathan".

They quickly entered a shuttle service that could apparently travel at light speed. With that it was only a few second ride to where the Vatican would have been. Going inside the nearby cathedral, they saw that the ceiling where the stain glass window would have been now had random pictures of random women.

"Wow," Nathan gawked.

"I know, dude." Colin nodded. "With no Christianity to inspire Michelangelo, they gave the job to John Hinckley. Well are you ready to go back?"

"No," Nathan said. "This is amazing. Can we see more universes?"

"Hmm… well I never really tried, but I don't see how we couldn't." Colin said.

With that, Colin pressed another button and they disappeared.

Well this is going to be fun

For those of you who think this is familiar, I have this to say: yes, I'm ripping off Family Guy; no, there's a point about this

R&R, plz

NITRO PSYCHO OUT!