Seven Days of Sarah Palin

by Pala-and-Papipa

Day 1: Meet Sarah Palin

Chris walked up to each of the trailers and yelled into his megaphone as loud as he could, "FOUR O'CLOCK WAKE UP CALL!" He watched all the castmates tiredly walk out of their trailers, dressed and not so ready to go. Soon after breakfast, Chris announced to the castmates, "There will be a new intern coming in today. She'll be here for a week and will monitor your every move."

"So someone is going to watch us even without your stupid cameras rolling?" Heather asked, glaring that the absurdness of it all.

"Yes, yes she will," Chris answered, smiling evilly. "Her name is Sarah Palin!"

"You mean that Alaskan governor with five-and-a-half kids?" Gwen asked, not sure if Sarah Palin has five kids or six.

"Not that Sarah Palin," Chris replied. "She looks more like this Barbie doll and just has the same name as that Alaskan governor." He held up a Barbie doll with long light brown hair.

Duncan laughed, "You have a Barbie doll?!"

Ignoring Duncan's question, Chris watched a limousine drive up. A young woman in her twenties wearing a shiny pink minidress, pink heels and pink jewelry of all sorts walked out of the car and over to Chris. "This is Sarah Palin," he stated.

Sarah's blue eyes glistened as she said, "Chris, long time no see!" She hugged the host of the show.

"Are you two going out?" Gwen asked jokingly, adding, "'cause I'm pretty sure she's too young for you."

Most of the other castmates snickered, oblivious to Chris' glare. "No, we're cousins, and I'm almost thirty," he said. "I was going to let you guys have no challenges this week, but since you want to make fun of your host so much, I'm going to reconsider." All of the castmates started yelling denials that they ever made fun of Chris and that they will never ever do it again. Chris laughed and said, "No challenges then!"

Throughout the day, everyone did whatever, and Sarah watched, occasionally asking them questions. "So what do you want to do when you get off this set?" she asked a melancholy Trent.

"Keep my girlfriend away from Duncan," Trent replied.

"Um, who's Duncan?" she questioned.

Trent pointed to our favorite green-haired delinquent, who was talking to Gwen about his more personal information and past, like why he did what got him in Juvie and things like that. "Him," Trent said, glaring.

"I'm guessing that's your girlfriend who's talking to him?" Sarah asked. Trent nodded. "Oh," she merely said. "Um, I'm going to talk to them."

As Sarah approached the pair, she picked up some of the conversation. "That must've hurt," Gwen said, putting a hand on her arm.

"That's not the worst part," Duncan said, smiling. "I also fractured my–"

"Are you Duncan?" Sarah interrupted, looking at the delinquent.

Duncan scoffed, "Yeah, and why did you interrupt me?! I was telling Gwen an awesome story!"

"If by 'awesome' you mean 'totally bogus,' then yes, yes it was," Gwen said.

Duncan glared at her and barely audibly whispered, "Bitch."

"Gwen, your boyfriend wants to keep you away from Duncan after you guys get off this set," Sarah stated, looking at the Goth.

"Talk about overprotective!" Duncan commented.

"Tell that to Courtney!" Gwen shot back.

"Hey, at least she's got personality!" Duncan argued.

"Trent actually has friends unlike your big-mouthed harpy of a girlfriend!" Gwen snapped.

"One more word and I'm going to seriously injure you!" Duncan warned.

"I'd like to see you try!" Gwen yelled.

Now everyone watched as Gwen and Duncan argued and threw insults at each other, which were usually about their love interests. Sarah watched helplessly as the two started playing actual Mortal Kombat on the guys' trailer, which finally gave away and fell underneath their feet. The first to rise from the rubble was Gwen, who immediately took off running, followed by Duncan, who ran after her, carrying a solid metal pole as a weapon. "Duncan! Stop! Don't kill her!" Sarah yelled, running after the Mohawk-donned delinquent.

Duncan stopped and turned around. "What?" he asked, threateningly holding the pole.

Sarah backed away from him, saying, "Don't kill Gwen, OK?"

"She insulted my girlfriend," Duncan snarled, tightening his grip on the weapon.

"So? You insulted her boyfriend and she didn't chase you around threatening to kill you with a metal pole!" she pointed out.

Duncan dropped the pole, sighing, "Point taken."

Gwen walked over to them and high-fived Sarah. "Thanks Sarah," she said.

"No problem," Sarah dismissed. She added, whispering in Gwen's ear, "You have to apologize."

"What?!" Gwen asked, her eyes widening. "Bu–" Sarah shook her head, and Gwen sighed. She turned to Duncan. "I-I'm sorry," Gwen forced herself to say. "It's just that I don't know Courtney that well."

Duncan nodded, saying, "I'm sorry too, even if I meant everything I said about Trent."

Gwen glared, but accepted his apology. "Friends?" she asked.

"The best," he adds. The high-five and embrace in that order.

Trent glared. Up until that point he had been enjoying their fight. After all, the last thing he wanted was Gwen and Duncan getting along. He watched in despair as the two horror fanatics started engaging in a deep conversation. Sarah sat by him on the step of the girls' trailer since the guys' was destroyed by Duncan and Gwen. "You feeling OK?" Sarah asked Trent.

"No," Trent replied. "I can't believe Gwen is always hanging out with Duncan!"

"I know you can't, but you can't stop a rapidly growing friendship between two people who are almost identical," Sarah stated.

"That's not helping," Trent said and walked away.

That night, Duncan and Gwen sat together on the step of the girls' trailer. "Look at the beautiful stars," Gwen commented, putting her head on Duncan's shoulder.

Duncan scoffed, "It looks like a Gothic version of Sarah's dress."

Gwen laughed. "So true," she agreed, remembering the sparkles in Chris' cousin's minidress. "What do you think of Sarah?" she asked, changing the subject a bit.

"She's OK," Duncan responded. "After all, she did stop me from killing you, as much as I wanted to then."

Gwen rolled her eyes and playfully punched him on the shoulder. "Whatever," she said.

Trent walked over to them, glaring at Duncan. Gwen wondered what her boyfriend's problem was when he asked, "What are you guys talking about?"

"Sarah Palin and her dress," Duncan replied.

Trent snapped, "I wasn't talking to you! I was talking to Gwen."

"We were talking about what Duncan just said," Gwen stated.

Duncan smiled. "Sweetheart, I like your style," he said, making Gwen blush and Trent glare. Soon enough, Chris ordered the castmates to their trailers for the night. Unfortunately for the girls, the guys had to sleep in their trailer since the guys' trailer was still not functioning correctly. This made things even more awkward, as if just being around these people wasn't awkward enough.

First chapter complete! This story will be updated weekly, unless I get writer's block. Then it will be monthly. Hopefully not. Anyway, did you like it? Love it? Absolutely hate it? Please let me know in a review!

Also, my favoritest quote from Total Drama Action is "Don't call me pretty! The last guy who called me pretty ended up looking a lot less pretty. Get it?" Hehehe... I should say that to some people I don't like.

Anyway... hope you liked it, review, yada yada... Bye!