Kage *

" I really can't say anything's troublesome from now on, huh…"

"You can say it a little, if it ever looks like you're getting so bad that you'll stop functioning, then I'll intervene and send you flying back to your senses again. So, it's okay."

"Aa, you're right. Then…"

What are we going to name him?

"Mendokuse…"

Wasn't long after war had ended, when he discharged from hospital, he rushed home, opening his old man's wardrobe and finding the mentioned box. Funny it seemed at first how his father wanted him to destroy the box so his mother would never find out about it but then again… looking at his father's belonging ached his heart.

He made sure to honor his late father's words and burn the stuff … still there was something, Shikamaru couldn't throw away. A ring shaped pendant, with the word しか (Shika) engraved on it. And so he wore it, keeping it close to his heart, as a memento.

Sighing, he looked up at the once soothing clouds. Today was his birthday. He never cared much about his birthday before and now wasn't any different but he had to get ready for the traditional Nara ceremony. On he's twentieth birthday, he wasn't even allowed to think of things as troublesome. He was going to be the head of Nara Clan. It was no joke. It was a responsibility that once his father carried and now it was passed down to him.

It made him smile though, how every troublesome events seem to be okay with him. He couldn't now laze around and look at the clouds to be drifted away by sleep. Hell, even sleep was a bad idea which he certainly tried to avoid. With sleep came the nightmares and with nightmares, unpleasant memories. Though Shikamaru knew, he wasn't the only one suffering from that.

With war, always came destruction, death and grief. And although it seemed everything was finally regaining its stability all around the world now, still the mental damages were lingering in people's mind and the once slacker was no exception.

Shikamaru, looked at the crimson horizon. He sure was late for his supposed birthday. In the past, if he was late, his mother would jump at his throat and complain about how he should be more responsible but nowadays, even his mother had had changed. Perhaps she finally grasped how busy his son truly was, so she understood better than to push him more than he was already pushed.

Everything was happening so fast lately even a sharp mind like Shikamaru's couldn't process its flow. From being a squad leader to Konoha's ambassador, one of Hokage's advisers and now the head of Nara Clan, he didn't know how to keep up with so many responsibilities all at once.

This, wasn't what Shikamaru had signed up for. And even though he could always keep the calm and determined face, deep inside he was flustered. He never thought one day he become so jealous of the certain blond boy. He, who was getting closer to his dream of becoming Hokage as Shikamaru was drifted away from his own goal or... was he?

Once the shadows revived around the cemetery, they stumbled upon Shikamaru's young but firm features, his chocolate eyes darted around the deserted place, puffing on his cigarette one last time before throwing it to the ground. He Pushed his hands into his pockets as he stood in front of two gravestones.

"Oyaji… Asuma… "

Those were the two great idols of his life. He grew up looking at their back wishing that someday he become someone like them. And now here he was, standing before them. He remembered why he came here in the first place. He wanted answers, some advice perhaps, something that could wash away his nervousness. After all he tended to be collected and calm.

Glancing at his own shadow, getting longer as the sun set. Shikamaru smiled, seemed to come to a conclusion for all his frustrations.

"Mendokuse… " he breathed and chuckled at the thought.

After all… wherever the sun is, the shadow exists. You can never separate the light from its shadows.

That was his goal. He was supposed to be the shadow for the light. One day Naruto was to be the shine of Konoha and he wanted to be at his side that day. Maybe that was all he ever wished for...

This goal seemed to worth enduring all the troublesome responsibilities. Even the traditional birthday he had to attend.

Then again... knowing what he truly wanted was the best birthday gift he could ever get, wasn't it?

"Arigato…"

*meaning : Shadow

The first lines of this chapter are actually from Shikamaru's Hidden Novel, I liked it so I inserted them here.

It's kinda a sweet coincidence that my favorite fictional character's birthday and my mother's birthday are both on a same day. September 22nd.

Happy Birthday to all of you out there that were born today!

hope you enjoyed ;)