For a very long time, I had wanted to write something where Renesmee takes a stand against Jacob. I never liked how no one stood up for Rosalie in breaking dawn when she was constantly being insulted, in her own home.

Therefore, I present to you:

Renesmee gets fed up with Jacob's blonde jokes.


Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. This is only a small spin-off off of Stephenie Meyer's work.

Apologies to any Jacob fans or Jacob/Renesmee fans who may read this. I don't mean to bash him or their ship.

[I don't hate him, I just don't particularly like him]. ;)


It was a quiet night in the town of Forks, Washington; neither too cold or too rainy, a commonality of the small town. The Cullen's were all gathered on the second floor of their deluxe home— along with Jacob—watching an old vampire movie. This was something the Cullens often liked to do.

The only two who weren't seated in the living room were Renesmee and Rosalie, they stood nearby the others but isolated within the kitchen. This was a common sight. Renesmee and Rosalie were very close to one another and they were together more often than not. This scene, however, was something that bothered Jacob—Renesmee's potential "future-love-interest". He despised Rosalie for more than one reason and he felt, through the years, that part of Rosalie was slipping into Renesmee's personality. He had spoken to Edward about it and asked him if it had bothered him as well; Edward's response astonished Jacob. Edward had explained that there was no reason why he could be bothered by Renesmee and Rosalie's friendship, they were family, and Edward was down for anything that got Rosalie off his case. But what truly took Jacob by storm was what Edward had said next:

"Rosalie is not a bad person, Jacob. You would be cruel to make such an observation. She has a good heart; she and I may fight like wild dogs, but don't you dare think for a second that we wouldn't die for each other."

Edward's response had both assured and terrified Jacob. It assured him that Rosalie wouldn't do anything horrible to Renesmee and take her by fault as Edward's daughter; but it terrified Jacob to know that if it came to it, Edward may take Rosalie's side instead of his, and Jacob needed Edward on his side if he were to even have a small chance with Renesmee.

So, Jacob opted to drive the blonde away from Renesmee's side, he figured that if he resurrected the blonde jokes when she was around Renesmee, that would lessen the amount of time she spent with her; all he would have to do is leave little time for Renesmee and Rosalie to be alone without his presence.

And so the blonde jokes were brought out again.

"Hey, Rosalie! Why did the blonde put her iPad in a blender? Because she wanted to make apple juice."

"At least she can afford one, mongrel," Emmett responded, trying to suppress his laughter. She was after all, his darling wife and angel.

And it continued like that for a week or two, Jacob would make jokes, Rosalie would insult him, Esme would attempt to keep the peace, and Emmett would come up with witty comebacks to defend his wife. That is, until tonight.

They had all been absorbed in the movie, so when Jacob spoke, his voice rang loud and clear.

"Hey blondie, you wanna know why blonde's can't have kids? Cause they don't know how to make 'em!"

From the corner of her eye, Renesmee saw Rosalie's eyes flare up, and her glare sending a thousand daggers at Jacob. He had crossed a line, even Renesmee knew—as young as she was— that Jacob had taken a hot iron and shoved it through Rosalie's heart. From across the room, her family stood frozen, some were sending dirty looks to Jacob, while others were preparing themselves for Rosalie's reaction—whatever it may be. But Rosalie surprised them all when she took a sharp turn and headed for her chambers.

"You know, Jacob," Renesmee broke the deafening silence, "Rosalie may have her flaws, but at least she never left her family when they needed her most."

Jacob's eyes widened, knowing exactly who Renesmee was talking about: his sister, Rebecca. Rebecca had married straight out of high school and left Forks, she never looked back.

"You want to know something, Jacob," Renesmee continued, "boys are like the New York City subway trains. You miss one, and another one comes along ten minutes later. And sometimes, you will realize that the reason why you couldn't catch the local, was because you were meant to ride the express."

By that point, Jacob's face had flushed red, not only had she brought up his past but she straight out told him that she could do better than him. This was definitely not what Jacob had planned for.

Renesmee turned and headed up the stairs, walking the same pace that Rosalie took up to her bedroom. Before she disappeared from view, however, she spoke clearly and strongly.

"I don't want to hear another blonde joke in this house, Jacob. Unless you have another girl in mind, which is okay, really. My aunt taught me not to fret about boys. Especially local ones."

A giggle escaped Rosalie's mouth from upstairs, signaling her approval of her darling niece's words. As he took a look around, he was surprised to see an approving smile on both Edward and Bella's lips. Emmett was smugly nodding, clearly pleased on how well Renesmee had handled the situation and defended his wife. Jasper was smirking, with a smiling Alice beside him. Carlisle and Esme were both trying to hide their smiles, but it was clear from the sparkle in their eyes that they were just as pleased to see Renesmee stand up to Jacob's derogatory jokes.

Knowing well that the movie was over, and that there was no reason for him to stay anymore, Jacob got up and left, grumbling about how nothing ever goes his way.