- Prance around the house singing Madonna's 'Like a virgin' at the top of your lungs every morning.

- Especially loud when Bella is around to hear it.

- Running it by Charlie that Edward has been 'sleeping' with Bella for the past 2 years, at the wedding reception.

- Buy a sex-ed book and shove it in his locker, making sure that whenever he decides to open it that it falls out, in clear view of the school.

- Make sure and tell Aro that Edward wants to elope with him.

- Smear your blood all over his new car freshener. Blame it on Jacob

- Program his locker to sing "YOU AND ME BABY WE AIN'T NOTHING BUT MAMMALS, SO LETS DO IT LIKE WE DO ON THE DISCOVERY CHANNEL!" every time he opens it

- Tell him it was Jacob's idea.

- Show him the twilight trailer. Ask him if he's thinks that he looks like a pedophile or if it's just you.

- Ask him where babies come from. Tell him he's stupid when he won't answer your question.

- For his birthday give him a $100 McDonalds gift card, and get offended when he tells you he doesn't eat food.

- Post his phone number on an Edward Cullen fan site

- Tell him Bella wants to elope with Paul.

- Ask him why he likes watching Bella sleep. Call him a pervert.

- Ask him to be a gangster with you for Halloween.

- Get offended when he refuses.

- Take him to Victoria's Secret with Alice.

- Constantly remind him that he almost lost Bella to a dog.

- Graffiti his car. 'Jacob and Edward = LURVE'

- Picture yourself naked and covered in blood. Ask him if he wants you.

- Call him a liar when he says no.

- Throw boysenberry flavored muffins at him every time he tries to speak.

- Tell him Bella is pregnant and eloping with Mike Newton.

- Tell him you were kidding once he murders Mike.

- Ask him if Charlie is secretly a unicorn.

- Make him watch the Twilight movie.

- Ask him if he thinks Robert Pattinson is hot. When he says no, tell him he has low self esteem issues.

- Buy him a dog. Name it Jacob.

- Ask him if he's a virgin.

- Tape porn to his walls.

- Make sure Bella sees it.

- Nail his CDS to the ceiling along with his Stereo.

- Refuse to take them down.

- Tell him Jacob thinks he's a sex god.

- Ask him why he's not as hot as Robert Pattinson.

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A/N-

If you have any to add please tell me.