Disclaimer: I don't own Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles, its characters, Zorro, or Mr. Sad Squiggle.
A/N: So… My last crack fic ended up being much more popular than I expected, so here's another one! Again, I must thank Jill, because all of these ideas come from my weird conversations with her.
Also, I never thought I would say this, but I have to thank my biology teacher for giving us that poster project, because this fic was also inspired by that. …Well, the first part was, anyways, lol
Randomness: If you live in my town, you'll probably be able to figure out from this fic who I am if you know me… So yeah, if anyone reading this actually lives here, you'll probably think I'm much more insane than you would before.
And, finally, umm… Don't ask why there's a Tomoyo in our world, 'cause I honestly don't know. There just is. And no, my sister's birthday isn't actually tomorrow. And Mr. Sad Squiggle is a toy that Jill has that neither of us can remember the name of. It lights up, and it had a face on it, but it wore off, so Jill drew a sad face back on it.
Pairings: KuroFai, SyaoSaku, SakuxMr. Sad Squiggle, and any others that happen to pop in here while I'm writing.
Warnings: Language, yaoi, crack, kind-of-spoilers for up to Nihon, and… People I know? (Meaning that me, my sister, and Jill are in here, along with other minor appearances of people I know, although most names have been changed).
Sorry about the super long author's note!
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With a woosh, the Tsubasa gang appeared on Earth… Well, with a woosh and several bangs, really, because Mokona wasn't too good at landings. Luckily, they landed right in front of my apartment, which I happened to be walking out of. It would be a bit of an understatement to say that I was surprised to see Fai, Kurogane, Sakura, Syaoran, and Mokona sprawled in front of my door in the lawn chairs and flowerpots.
I laughed evilly, and they all jumped, looking up at me.
"Excuse me," Sakura piped up. "But do you know of an inn we could stay at nearby? We're travelers."
"Oh, you can just stay in my house! It's really small, but I'm sure we can make some room for you! And you wouldn't have to pay! Instead, I just need you to do me a small favor," I said, already getting evil ideas. I could see Kurogane's untrusting look, but everyone else seemed happy at the thought of not having to find a way to get money or look for a place to stay.
"That would be great, Ms…?" Fai said.
"Becca. Just Becca," I answered. When I noticed his mouth opening to introduce himself, I cut him off. "It's okay, I already know you guys are."
They looked confused for a moment, but as expected, they just shrugged. They probably thought I was a dream seer or something. Hehe, this could be very fun.
Then I took them inside to tell my parents and work out room arrangements.
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In the end, Kurogane and Fai took the room that Grace (my sister) and I share. …Too bad I couldn't take out one of the beds… Stupid bunk beds, ruining my yaoi dreams… Wait, when did I become such a pervert?! …Oh right, the moment I met any of my friends.
My parents kept their room, and Sakura, Syaoran, Grace, and I ended up in the living room. We all agreed that Sakura could take the couch, Syaoran and Grace slept on the chairs, and I said that I would sleep on the floor.
I wasn't actually going to sleep, though. Grace's birthday is tomorrow… If I do this right, then it might just work. So I texted Jill and told her to meet me at the park down the road.
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Early the next morning, I walked back into the house, rubbing my eyes and just being thankful that it was a three-day weekend. I was followed by Jill and Tomoyo. Apparently the others had just woken up and were wondering where I was, because I'd told them I would be their guide in this world.
The gang looked up when the door opened, and their eyes widened when they saw Tomoyo… and the bags she was carrying.
"Oh shit," Kurogane said. He knew that the bags could only be clothes. However, Tomoyo completely ignored him and ran to Sakura.
"She's just as adorable as you said she would be!" she gushed. (Yeah, I knew that mentioning a 'super cute girl' would get her to help me).
Ignoring her, I turned to the others. "Okay, guys, this is where that 'favor' I asked you for comes into play." Then I turned to my sister. "Grace, go in the room. This is a surprise for later."
I waited until I heard the bedroom door shut before I continued. "So I need you guys to put on a play for my sister's birthday. I know it might be a bit much to ask, but I'd really be grateful! And Tomoyo, Jill, and I even stayed up all night to make the costumes! So do you think you could do it? Pleeasseee?"
"Of course!" Fai, Mokona, and Sakura replied at the same time. Syaoran didn't say anything, and Kurogane growled but was ignored.
"Thank you so much! Okay, so this is a play based on a poster I did for my biology class," I said and started telling them the details.
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Princess Sakura sat in front of her "castle" (AKA a toy at the playground across the street). She was wearing a beautiful but very overdone dress that Tomoyo had made for her. It was full of frills and pink fabric and anything cute she could think of.
Syaoran was protecting her from the dinosaurs a few feet away. He was wearing a costume that looked a lot like Zorro's, complete with cape and mask.
Fai was wearing a T-rex costume. It was a very bright red. Tomoyo, Jill, and I had wanted to make it pink, but all of the pink fabric had been used on Sakura's dress. Jill and I had dubbed it the "Flamboyantly Gay T-rex" even before Fai was wearing the costume, back when it was just a terrible drawing on some stupid assignment.
Kurogane was looking very pissed off and wearing a dark purple Pterodactyl costume, which we had nicknamed Emodactyl. He hadn't wanted to do the play at first, but Fai had managed to get him into the costume and out to the playground. I'm not exactly sure how, but I have my ideas.
The rest of us (including Grace) were sitting on a bench nearby, waiting for the play to begin.
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"Rawr!" The FGT (Flamboyantly Gay T-rex) attempted to roar as it came closer to the princess. It was following the Emodactyl, who was looking more and more angry by the second.
"Look!" I yelled to Jill, pointing at the 'dinosaurs.' "It looks like the Flamboyantly Gay T-rex is trying to eat the Emodactyl!" We giggled at the line that I'd first said while drawing them. Wow… We can be really immature sometimes, I pondered before returning my attention to the scene before me.
"No! I won't let you kill Princess Sakura!" Zorro Syao yelled, pulling out his sword and killing off the dinosaurs within seconds and then proceeding up the steps to the princess's castle.
"How could you?!" she gasped, slapping him. "Those were my friends! I'm dumping you!"
"But Hime!" Zorro Syao yelled desperately. "They were trying to kill you!"
"No they weren't! They wanted to come play with me!" the princess huffed. "And it's too late for you! I'm going to go out with Mr. Sad Squiggle now!" she shouted, pulling the toy out of thin air and hugging it. Zorro Syao sat on the floor and started crying.
Meanwhile, unknown to either of them, the Emodactyl was still just barely alive. It crawled over to the FGT and slit its own wrist with a sharp talon, letting the blood drip into the other dinosaur's mouth. The FGT suddenly came back to life, jumping up in shock. It looked down at its fallen friend and roared loudly.
The howl caught Princess Sakura's attention, and she looked down to see that the dinosaurs were still alive. She quickly ran to the slide and slipped down to check on them. When she got there, she saw that a wound on the Emodactyl's right wing was making it bleed to death.
Without having a clue how she did it, the princess amputated the Emodactyl's wing and replaced it with a mechanical one.
Suddenly, I jumped up and yelled, "And they all lived happily ever after! …Except Zorro Syao."
…Okay, so maybe that last part with the blood and the wing wasn't the most appropriate thing for a play at a child's birthday party, but… I just really wanted to add that in there… Hehehe…Heh…Heh… Okay, yeah, I'm stupid, whatever.
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And that was Friday, our first amazing day with the Tsubasa gang.
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A/N: Okay, there's a lot more to this. I was originally going to make this a oneshot, but it'll be way too long if I do, and aside from that, I just wanted to post this now to see what people think. So the first chapter ends there…
Preview for the next chapter:
"A hot dog? You're trying to tell me that this is a sexy dog? And I'm supposed to eat it? I already have a sexy dog to eat!"