I don't own Mamma Mia. Only the... feminine *cough* gay *cough* wedding planners.

PEPPER, EDDIE, LARRY and the two wedding planners are trying to come up with an agreement for what style the wedding should be. Larry, Pepper and Eddie want what Sophie wants; a traditional white wedding, but the wedding planners want a 'modern' Arctic wedding. Donna has told the three to help Andre and to do what he says.

ANDRE (main wedding planner): (ignoring Eddie, Larry and Pepper) Alright, the ice sculptures will go here in place of flowers, and the dress should have an 'Ice Queen' theme-

LARRY: That doesn't sound like the wedding Sophie has planned…

ANDRE: (glances at them) I'm sorry, and you are?

LARRY: I'm Larry.

ANDRE: (glances at Pepper) And you, with the girly hair?

PEPPER: Did you say curly or girly?

ANDRE: … Curly, let's say I said curly. Yeah, curly's better. So I'm dealing with Larry, Curly and (turns to Eddie) who are you? Moe? I feel like I'm at amateur night on Broadway here! (turns to other wedding planners) I'm not dealing with the Three Stooges, am I?

JAMIE (wedding planner apprentice 1): I-I don't know, boss, I kinda like the Three Stooges.

ANDRE: Why I oughta-

PEPPER: Well who're you? Frank (pronounced Fronk) from Father of the Bride?

ANDRE: says the guy with the ponytail

PEPPER: (moves to hit him)

EDDIE: (holds Pepper back)

ANDRE: (to other wedding planners again) Now this will be expensive, especially if we want the waddle black and white birds-

EDDIE: What are you going to do? Charge Donna ten thousand for the cake?

ANDRE: Eleven, actually. Now don't you have a pie to throw in someone's face?

EDDIE: Listen, wise guy; my name ain't Moe.

ANDRE: Well you sure ain't that smart either, are you?

LARRY: Says the guy trying to bring penguins to a wedding in Greece.

REECE (Wedding planner apprentice 2): He's got a point, boss.

ANDRE: (taps chin) Hm… (points at Larry) You're right! (to other wedding planner) Scratch the birds; they look stupid when they waddle all over the place anyway. I want the bear! Not the brown one though, the white one! The one that's in the Bird's Eye adds! The white one! The… the…

REECE: You mean… polar bears?

ANDRE: (yelling excitedly) Yes! Yes! I want the polar bears! And bring in the birds to, the black and white ones that waddle, what are they? We were talking about them a minute ago!

JAMIE: Penguins?

ANDRE: Are they the waddle birds in the tuxedos?

JAMIE: Yeah, that's penguins

ANDRE: Right, I want them too!

EDDIE: (shakes head)

ANDRE: Oi! Larry, Curly, Moe! Get over here!

LARRY: (groans and walks over to Andre)

PEPPER AND EDDIE: (Ignore him)

ANDRE: (noticing Pepper and Eddie don't go to him) Curly, Moe! Are you deaf or something? Get over here! You two guys – the guys who know what the bears and birds are called – why don't you take over from Curly and Moe.

Eddie: You can't fire us! We don't work for you!

JAMIE: See - that right there – that's why you don't work for him!

Jamie, Reece and Andre get mad and begin singing a song about working together.

Larry, Pepper and Eddie join in sarcastically.

EDDIE: (holds up pie) You know what? You're right. I guess I shouldn't have been offended by you calling me Moe. All in childish humour. I should have just given you one of these! (Shoves pie in Andre's face – a paper plate with whipped cream can be pie substitute – and walks away)

REECE: (hands Andre tissue)

PEPPER: And I can forgive you calling my hair girly. Do you want a truce?

ANDRE: (nods and wipes face)

PEPPER: Alright; if you answer this question; what do you multiply by R squared to get the circumference of a circle?

REECE: I know! Pi!

PEPPER: That's right. Pie. (shoves another pie in Reece's face and walks away)

LARRY: Get outa here! (shoves pie in Jamie's face and leaves)

JAMIE: Boss?

ANDRE: What is it?

JAMIE: Maybe we should scratch the Arctic theme…

ANDRE: (nods) Okay…

End Scene

Note: Whatever Pepper, Larry and Eddie sings must sound at least slightly sarcastic so it's obvious that they're disagreeing with the wedding planners

I didn't want to be mean to Pepper, Larry or Eddie, but I had to for the sake of the play (and my computer (dad made me and I can't loose my computer)). So, LacrymosaRules, Digidestined Rival of Earth, if you're reading this; please don't tell Harry. Please.

Good luck with your writing guys!
- DD Leader Dark Heart of Water, out