Authors Notes: Okay so I would have put this in my One-Shot/Drabble story collection, but I felt it was a little too dark and sadistic for that. This One-Shot contains cutting and other graphic content so if that will upset you I suggest you leave… I am as horribly sadistic as I am a hopeless romantic, this story shows my other side and I hope those of you who do read will review and let me know what you think of my first dark little Konami FanFiction…
Disclaimer: I do not own Lucky Star or any merchandise related to it. However, I do own this story yay for me! Clap, Clap, Clap!
Konata is usually so hyperactive and fun to be around, but lately I've started to notice she's been in a really deep state of depression; despite how hard she tries to hide it…
(Kagami's POV)
Everything started two weeks ago.
Konata had finally found the courage to confess her bi-sexuality to her father; however, despite the man's creepy tendencies and weird tastes he took the news in the worst possible way. After yelling at his only child, cursing her, disowning her, and throwing any object within reach at her, he threw her out onto the street with only her school bag.
Sojiro was in such a blind and fury filled rage that he accidentally almost took his own life…
After his life threatening accident was avoided, thanks to Yui, he was admitted into a mental hospital that specialized in helping patients who have tried or were going to try and take their own life just in case it wasn't an accident after all. While Yui and Yutaka were able to go see the man freely; Konata wasn't even allowed into the hospital due to the fact it worked her father up so much.
Every time someone even mentioned Konata's name the man would rage and scream things like: "That thing is not my child" and "I don't claim that!"
But even with everything going wrong in Konata's life she never told us about her problems and despite her almost painfully obvious fictitious happiness none of us could see the change in her at first. But it didn't take long for us to all of us to start noticing the little changes; black rings under her bloodshot eyes, fidgety and overly jumpy, way too quiet for her normal personality…
It was slowly becoming more and more apparent that something was seriously wrong, but every time she was asked about it she would put on another fake smile and brush off the questions saying that everything was just fine.
The changes started to become more drastic; she started wearing only long sleeves even though it was so ungodly hot this summer, she was startled more easily and every time it happened she would crouch down into a ball with her knees at her chest and shake almost uncontrollably, she even started to avoid us and our phone calls.
I really should have gone to check on her sooner and to be honest I'm not sure why I hadn't… It was when I finally did end up going over to her house to see what was wrong that I found out what had happened. Her dad had not only kicked her out with only her school bag of stuff, but he sold everything in the house and moved in with his sister and Konata's aunt half way across the country.
When I asked Yui and Yutaka about it they said they didn't know where she was and for the record, Yutaka looked far more worried than Yui did.
I had no idea where to begin looking, but that didn't stop me from looking for my little otaku; Konata was alone and hurting somewhere and I was not going to sit by and wait for this all to blow over! Unlike her worthless family I was going to find her and give her comfort if it was the last thing I did!
I decided to search the apartment complexes first and with luck I found the one she was staying at on my third try. It was a small batch of apartments on 'that' part of town and to put it frankly they sucked, but it was obviously the best she could do on a waitress's salary. It was dirty and it smelt bad; I wondered how long she had been living in this shit hole…
Damn that was a tear; I can't break down now, I have to stay strong for Kona… She'll need that…
First thing I'm going to do is get her out of this horrible place and back to my house where I can take care of her, second thing I'm going to do is find out what really happened and maybe get her father's ass thrown in jail; easier said than done, but I can hope…
I walked up to the second floor of the apartment building after asking the front desk for her room and found despite the door being locked it didn't stay shut. Great, she's staying in this trashy place with a door that practically screams "please come in and rape me"; I swear if anyone has touched her…
I push the door open and before I could call out to her I was hit with the most horrible smell, it was almost like an old rusty bathroom kind of smell; like one at an old camp ground. Now I know the place is old and probably hasn't been refurnished or cleaned in years, but something else had to have made that god awful smell.
For some reason I didn't try to call out to her again as I ventured inside.
She literally had nothing; no furnishing, none of the otaku frivolities she loved so much, there was nothing in the apartment that gave any clue to her living there; it was just void of everything. I cursed her dad under my breath as I went from room to room to find the same thing in each, nothing… That is until I reached the kitchen…
That horrid rusty smell obviously came from this room and upon entering I could see why… Tears immediately started to well in my eyes at that utterly heart shattering sight; I swear I will never see this sight again, you hear me? NEVER A-FUCKING-GAIN!
First off the sink was clogged with who knows what; that must have been what she used to bathe in and fucking forbid drink from, she had a few articles of clothing strung around and a couple crumpled up pieces of paper here and there.
But by far the worst thing I saw, and the thing that killed me a little inside, was Konata herself… There my little Kona was, crouched on the kitchen floor wearing only her bra and panties, dragging a thin silver razor blade through her soft pale white skin; skin that was so perfectly flawless before, now covered in terrible gashes and deep welled cuts.
I wanted to vomit at the sight of Konata's tiny body hunched over, covered in cuts and blood; oh god there was so much blood on the floor thanks to it just pooling out of her skin where she had slashed it open. The skin I could see that wasn't covered in blood had what seemed to be self-inflicted bruises from where she beat herself and the blood splatters on the wall confirmed it for me…
It was obvious that she hadn't eaten in days given how fail and skinny she looked. Her long beautiful cobalt blue hair was all dried up and breaking off at the ends; it looked like she had been cutting it, but I knew better. Konata's hair was the one thing she felt kept her close to her mom and I knew she would never cut it voluntarily.
I watched as Konata dragged the blade across her thigh and I felt sick at the pained sob she released; she brought her hand to her mouth and coughed, it was when she pulled the hand back with a little blood trickling from her lips down her chin that I finally snapped out of my daze and lost it.
"Damnit Konata!" I screamed as I smacked the razor blade from her hand while she was still stunned by my sudden appearance.
"Kagami, why are you here? How did you find me? Don't hate me too, please I couldn't take it…" Konata looked up at me with fearful and pained eyes as she sobbed loudly, clawing at my legs weakly giving me a perfect view of the damage she had done to herself.
Konata was such a headstrong girl; never letting anything in life even begin to faze her, but this had been too much. Her father's severe rejection thrown on top of all the others problems she had stored inside her had finally broken her and reduced her to this.
I slowly bent down and pulled her into a loving hug, not giving a damn about her covering my uniform in blood. I wanted to get her bandaged and to a hospital for treatment, but I knew that she wouldn't allow me to in this state; my best bet was to get her calmed down first before trying to relocate her, but I had to hurry because some of those cuts looked deep…
"I could never hate you Kona; I am a little upset you didn't come to me for help… You know I could have helped you right…?" I said as calmly as I could, but the more her blood pooled at our feet the more I felt myself losing control of my emotions. I wouldn't let myself break down now; I had to be strong for her sake right now, so with that thought in mind I began to stroke her hair and whisper soothing nothings into her ear.
"I can't trust anyone… You'll just throw me away, but the razor listens… It understands and it helps me forget all the pain…" Konata mumbled in between hiccups before continuing her sobbing, albeit a little softer now.
"Don't talk like that; you know I wouldn't ever throw you away…" Konata was hurt really, really bad from this… I had no idea she was so sensitive, all this time she just absorbed everything life threw at her like a sponge and never showed any sign of pain or suffering, but Sojiro's actions were like a big pair of hands wringing her out and now she was just a broken and pitiful excuse of the girl she once was.
"I can't believe you…" Konata was screaming now and struggling to get out of my grasp. I don't know how to describe it, but I just knew if I let her go right then I would never have another chance to save her… And that scared me…
"I don't care I am going to help you whether you like it or not!" I stated this fact firmly and pulled her into my chest and firmly held her there, although she had stopped struggling at this point.
"Will you really stay with me…?" Konata sounded a little hopeful, but more tiered then anything and it caused me to wonder when the last time she had slept was.
"I'm not going anywhere Kona; I'll be with you forever." I was practically confessing my undying love for her, but she was to out of it to even realize what was going on around her.
The little blue haired angel drifted into a nightmare filled sleep in my arms, but I knew a sleep filled with nightmares was better than getting no sleep at all so I didn't wake her. I decided as soon as she woke up I would get her bandaged, then force some food into her, and finally take her home and have mom take a look at her so we can decided whether she needs real medical attention.
I found myself subconsciously touching her bloody and still bleeding skin; such deep ravines in her flesh and it wasn't just on her arms and legs, she even cut her stomach and up around her rib cage, which was far more pronounced now since she hadn't been eating anything.
I wanted to kick myself for not seeing the signs sooner, for not helping her sooner, for letting her go at the most two weeks without a friend except that wretched razor blade. I angrily took the damned thing and threw it out the window and was satisfied to hear it land in the dumpster with a small clang.
I will protect her with everything I have; I won't let her hurt like this again… As soon as she is able to fully understand what is going on I will tell her how much I love her, how much she means to me, about how she can lounge around all day and do absolutely nothing at all and I will still provide for her and lover her until I die…
The thought of death scares me, what if I had been too late? What if she got to the point of suicide like her father? It would have been slow and painful with just a razor… Damn now I'm in tears and even worse I'm shaking, I can't break down in front of her and especially not now, but those thoughts of Konata slitting her wrists and bleeding to death…
I scream out in fear… That image was just too much for me to handle; I pull Konata in close as if my thoughts might become reality before my very eyes. She looks up at me with half lidded eyes and then smiles lazily before saying:
"I can't sleep if you keep squeezing me like that Kagamin~…"
With that she's asleep, but this time it is a peaceful slumber. I can't shake the fear, the images won't leave my mind, and I can't stop crying… But it's all okay, because I have her now and she's safe in my arms…
"You always put me through hell you know that little girl?" I ask her sleeping body as I begin to lift her into the air, I need help tending to her and keeping my own emotions in check so I decided to carry her home.
"I try…" She mumbles in her sleep and I can't help but laugh out loud, a few tears still leaking from my eyes as I tell myself she is going to be okay…
~End~