I really hate hospitals.
Don't get me wrong, I've never had a phobia of hospitals or anything; it was just another place to me though, for the longest time. I went there when my kidney was failing, when I fell of my bike and sprained my ankle, when Kenny was actually dying. Unlike my super best friend, I never threw up by just being in one, blood never made me cringe; at least not until Ike was three.
He had joined kindergarten that year, most of the days; he missed the bus ride home, so he would walk. I remember the day we took him to the hospital for the first time very clearly:
I sat in the front yard, shivering. I cursed Ike under my breath. That little bastard was half an hour late and I had to sit outside and wait for him. I looked at the phone. 15 minutes had passed. I swear I'm going to kick his ass the minute I see him. I look up, and see something that I will soon realize, will forever scare me for life.
Blood.
So much fucking blood.
I thought he had been stabbed, or beaten up by some bully. I never would have expected a bloody nose. His whole front was covered from the stuff spewing from little Canadian nose, his blue eyes layered with worry. His hands covered the bottom part of his face trying to stop the gushing red geyser.
"Ike!" I scream running up to him, ripping my coat off my body I replaced his hands with it. "What the hell happened to you?"
: "I D-don't K-k-know." Shakily, yet calmly he spoke, "It's been like this since halfway home." No wonder. There was so much fucking blood.
"Nobody hurt you?" I asked.
"No, nobody hur-"
He was cut off midway by my mothers piercing scream.
The rest of it was one big blur. Being throw into the car, rushing to the ER, watching my brother getting multiple tests done on him, my mother sobbing, then I remember the doctor walking in. His face solemn. He spoke words that I never wanted to hear be spoken about anyone in my family. My throat closed up, I tuned out my mother's screams and my dads sobs, and everything was a blur. Except him. My little brother, the one I had not once said "I love you" too in a non-joking way. He walked up to me I remembered all the times, I had played "kick the baby' with him to get him away from me, and tears began to glaze my eyes. He looked at our mother and father, then towards me, then back at them again.
"Is everything okay, Ky?" He questioned. His big blue eyes filled with youth and curiosity. I tried answering him; I opened and closed my mouth four or five times trying to get a word out of my tightened throat. It felt impossible. He noticed this, and hugged me; his arms only reaching to my waist.
"It's okay." I don't if he meant it was okay to cry, or it was okay I wasn't responding. Either way at that moment I burst out in sobs. I knelt down and hugged him tightly.
"I-i-i L-ove yo-u-u I-k-k-e." I said in-between sobs. He hugged me tighter.
"I love you to big brother.' He whispered back.
That was the last time I ever cried.
I remember one time; my father took me up to the maternity ward. We sat there for the longest time in the lounge for the longest time, listening to the squeals of newborns, and just watching people. Watching new fathers, grandmas, or uncles use the phone, the biggest smile set on their face. They laughed about nothing and everything all at once. Though neither of us said anything, we envied them. We envied the fact they had their life under control, that in the next couple days they would take their healthy baby home. We envied that they knew that they'd see that beautiful healthy baby, hopefully, grow up and live a long and healthy life. Something we might never have the chance to see with Ike.
That was the last time he ever went to the hospital with us.
My brother has leukemia. Acute myeloid leukemia. He's relapsed some many times, in the last couple years; they don't expect him to live much longer. We've tried everything, chemotherapy, bone marrow transplants, all that fun stuff. They say his body is giving up. But even if his body gives up on him, even if both my parents give up on him, the doctors, the world, everybody else gives up on him.
I won't. Ever.
And that's a promise.
AN: Yeah, yeah I know it's not the best. Its something I literally just wrote off the top of my head. It was way longer than planned too. I don't exactly know where I'm going with this story, I have a slight idea, but I hoped you enjoyed. I usually will be updating at very random times, usually the middle of the night. -_- This will be a Kyman story, and we will also be dealing with problems other than Ike's disease ( and how it affects Kyle and his family), it's just a big part of the story. The next chapter will be much better, promise. ;) I hope you liked it, please review! I will personally review to each one of your comments, and I LOVE constructive criticism.
R&R!
~Madi 3
Song I wrote this too;
Dark Blue- Jacks Mannequin