THE JAK II ROAD TRIP AND HOT SPRINGS VACATION
PART ONE: GETTING THERE
Bakura: The creators of Jak II wanted to give the actors of the game a little trip to a hot springs. This is their story.
I actually based this on a couple of things. See if you can pick up on them.
I don't own anything, well unless you count Jak, Erol, and Torn's underwear that I "borrowed." ^_____^
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Jak: Man, I can't believe Naughty Dog is FINALLY giving us the credit we deserve. I mean I've been working for these people for the best years of my life and what have they done to me? First, they make me NOT talk, turn my best friend into a furry thing, make me die THOUSANDS of times, hurl me into the future, experiment on me, turn ME into a FREAKING GOAT BOY!, make me die THOUSANDS of times AGAIN!, then make me find out that the same thing will happen OVER AND OVER AGAIN SINCE THAT LITTLE BOY WE BEFRIENDED WAS ME!!!!!!!!!!!!
Torn: And I thought I had serious mental problems. Jak, you need to calm down.
(Jak glares down Torn.)
Daxter: So where exactly are we going?
Ashelin: Werk, Sixarp, and Rok's Hot Springs and Bar. It is the new, hip place according to the producers.
Torn: Well if it is the new, hip place, then why couldn't they pitch in enough money to rent us a better bus. This one smells really bad! It smells like wet animal fur and sewer water.
Daxter: Well don't look at me! Jak turned me back into a human so you can't pin any animal jokes on me anymore.
???: Baaaaaaa!
Torn: What the hell was that?!
Ashelin: It sounded like it was in the cargo hold in the bottom of the bus.
(Ashelin and Torn grab their guns and open the hatch very carefully.)
???: BAAAAAAAAAAAA!
(suddenly a white creature that looks like a cross between a goat and a cat rushes out of the hole.)
Erol: Jak! You followed me! Good boy! (begins hugging the goat-cat.)
Torn: You named it Jak!!??
Erol: Yes. Isn't he the sweetest baby in the whole world? I named him after the sweetest guy here. Our hero, Jak! Take a bow.
Jak: I really don't want to.
Erol: Please?! (grabs Jak and nearly hugs the life out of him.)
Jak: Damn, you sure got weird ever since you crashed into that Dark Eco. Maybe I shouldn't have saved you.
Erol: You don't mean that Jak. You loooove me and you want to kiiiiisssssss me and you want to daaaate me.
Torn: Exactly what is going on with you two?
Jak: (blushing madly) Well, guys, there's something we kind of been meaning to tell you all…
Erol: We're so freaking in love with each other that we've been going out every night for the past two weeks!
Daxter: That's why you never answer your phone!
Torn: That's why you don't like night duty in the Guard!
Keira: Grrrr. That's the one that stole your heart from me!
Jak: Uh, Keira, who are you referring to? Erol or me? Because you did like both of us.
Keira: Just go away.
Sig: You know since you and me are the only ones that don't have anybody, you and I could…
Keira: What do you mean you and I don't have anybody?!
Daxter: Well, I have Tess, Torn and Ashelin are together, and I'm guessing Jak and Erol are together, so you two are the only ones without anyone.
Keira: Get out of my face!!!
Ashelin: Man what is your problem, Keira?!
Keira: I'm just frustrated!
Samos: What's wrong baby girl?
Keira: Just the fact that the only guy that I've ever liked is gay and I ran out of Peachy Cream shower gel yesterday so I had to buy the Sparkling Strawberries gel for the trip and it doesn't go with my shampoo, conditioner, toothpaste, body spray, deodorant, and bath sponge!
Tess: And I thought I was the only one here that liked girl stuff.
Jak: Well, I'm just glad that they invited everybody on this trip. It would have sucked if they didn't. So Ashy, why didn't your father come?
Ashelin: Call me Ashy again, and you die! And you WON'T be coming back! And my father said something about a game or something, so that's why he's not here.
Vin: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
(everyone turns around to see Vin huddled in a corner.)
Torn: Hey Vin, what's wrong?
Vin: This…this bus…it looks like the one those people were in! The one where you couldn't go lower than a certain speed or it would blow up! HOW FAST ARE WE DRIVING?!
Brutter: Relax power man. We going fifty-six miles per hour. We safe.
Torn: Besides that was a movie. Who would want to blow us up?
Jak: Let's see, Baron Praxis, Erol, Krew, Kor, the Krimzon Guards, Metal Heads, the zoomers when they exploded, Gol, Maia, pools of dark eco, lava and Samos when we didn't clean his hut up.
Samos: Funny Jak. Real funny.
Erol: Yeah. Besides, I don't want to blow you up now.
Daxter: Yeah, but he will later.
Jak & Erol: O.O
Jak: Daxter! Enough! That's sick!
Daxter: Well you heard it folks. Straight from the goat's mouth.
Ashelin: Guys, I'm starving. Let's stop and eat.
(they soon arrive at a Chinese All-You-Can-Eat buffet. Everyone goes to the buffet line. Ashelin is the last to arrive at the table. Her plate is piled with food so high, you can't see her at all. As soon as she sits down, she begins inhaling the food.)
All: O.O
Torn: Uh Ashelin, are you sure you can eat that much? I mean, I thought you only ate health food and stuff like that? (begins reaching out to her.)
Ashelin: MINE!!!!!!!!!! (stabs Torn's hand with her fork and resumes eating.)
Torn: Bl…blood! (faints)
(Everyone looks at Torn strangely, then resumes eating. Once they are done, Sig picks Torn up and takes him to the bus. They then continue on their way.)
Erol: Hey, since Torn is asleep, we can mess with him you know.
Ashelin: Erol…
Erol: Hey! Not like that! I'm just wanting to get him back for that prank he pulled on me when we were all at the Academy.
Ashelin: Erol, that was years ago!
Erol: Yes, I know. But I'm still in therapy for it. I mean coming home to find clowns covering every inch of my dorm is enough to drive anyone crazy.
Daxter: You're afraid of clowns?
Erol: Yes, I saw a movie where a clown turned into a giant scorpion and locked everyone in the basement, stole all their stuff, then came back to eat them.
Ashelin: Well, it's not protocol, and petty pranks should be beneath Krimzon Guards, but I'll look away for about five minutes. In that time, do whatever you want.
Erol: Can I borrow some makeup?
(Erol begins to paint Torn's face up like a clown.)
Jak: I'm bored.
Erol: You could help me.
Jak: I'm through with revenge. Besides, that's your revenge, not mine.
Daxter: I brought the PS2.
Jak: Wheeeeeeeeeee! Now I can kick some ass!
(turns on Jak II and begins to try to beat Erol in the Accelerator Ring Race.)
Jak: Damnit! Quit getting in front of me! Stupid people! Get out of my way, you stupid idiots! Gaaaaaaaaa! I lost AGAIN!!!!!!!! STUPID EROL!!!!!!!!! I HATE YOU!!!!!!!!!!! (throws the controller down)
Erol: Can I try? I'm done with my revenge. (Erol picks up the controller and beats the challenge the first time.) Yay! I did it! I beat Erol!!!!!!!!!
Jak: Grrrr.
Daxter: Hey, let's play a game.
Keira: What kind of game? Last time you said that was in Sandover Village and the sculptor ended up with a giant statue of a naked mayor.
Daxter: Oh yeah… Anyway, that's not the game I want to play. Let's play What Animal Am I?
Keira: Ottsel.
Daxter: But I…
Keira: Yakcow.
Daxter: Keira…
Keira: Parrkey. (note: this is what Pecker is.)
Daxter: I haven't…
Keira: Croca-dog.
Daxter: I…
Keira: Go-at. (This is what Erol's pet is. It's pronounced Go At.)
Daxter: Enough! Okay, we won't play a game.
Brutter: Besides, former furry brother. We here at hot springs.
(They all get out and get their stuff. They get inside once Torn gets up.)
Torn: Guys? Are we here? Guys? (looks around and looks in the mirror.) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TO BE CONTINUED…
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Bakura: Well, that's part one. Part two is the actual hot springs trip and part three will be the conclusion. Tell me what you think and be patient for part two.
Review or Jak, Erol, and Torn don't get their underwear back.
Jak, Erol, and Torn: PLEASE REVIEW!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!