Summary - The iCarly gang go on their annual paintball game in Seattle Parks, so when Sam and Freddie are pitted against each other in a game of love and war, who will win? And more importantly, will they ever reveal their not-so-unrequited feelings for each other? One shot.
Disclaimer - If I owned iCarly, they would air a new episode every day, and each one would be three hours long. At least. Unfortunately, I do not, with is probably a good thing as I would most likely kill the actors from over exhaustion...!
A/N - Hi there people of the internet! This is my first fanfiction story, so I hope you guys like it! The paintball assassin episode of iCarly slightly inspired this, the scene when Sam turns upside down and shoots Spencer had me in stitches! I'm also working on a multi-chapter fic which should be uploaded soon. If you like this fic, please review! Constructive criticism and just nice comments in general are muchly appreciated! Thanks, enjoy!
Sink or Swim - Tyrone Wells
Kamakazi aeroplanes in the sky
Are we going down or will we fly?
This could be a ship wreck on the shore
We could sail away forever more
This time, it's sink or swim
Sam Puckett was crouched down amongst the bushes, her camouflaged clothes blending in nicely with her surroundings. She was a tiger, awaiting her prey, a timer ready to go off and attack at the sight of one colour; blue, the opposing team's colour. The boys.
Normally, she would be out on the front line, shooting paintballs at anything that moved, Mama did play to win after all, but today her team leader, and best friend, Carly had asked her to take a more subtle approach. Sam was the red team's best shot, Wendy and Tasha were still pretty new to the game after all, and if she could take down a member of the opposing team permanently, (well, until after the game had ended) then the odds would most definitely be in the girl's favour.
So all Sam had to do was sit, wait, and eat her pre-packed ham sandwiches, courtesy of the Shay household, until someone ran past holding the red team's flag. Then she would attack, steal back what was rightfully her team's and run back to the camp. A pretty sweet deal if you asked her.
Allowing her mind to wander briefly whilst chewing on her third, or was it fourth, ham sandwich, she couldn't help but think about a certain nub that had looked particularly good in his khaki paintball attire.
No, she stopped herself, shaking her head in disbelief. She couldn't start daydreaming about that dipthong again, it had already been embarrassing enough when Carly had to elbow her at the Groovy Smoothie for spilling her Strawberry Splat all over her shoes after Freddie had flexed his biceps whilst wearing a particularly tight t-shirt. How humiliating. And Sam did not get embarrassed easily; she had been doing random and at times slightly degrading segments on the iCarly for five years now.
She sighed, stuffing the rest of the sandwich in her mouth while peering out of the bushes, wishing she had brought some more fat cakes with her to pass the time. She wasn't sure when her feeling towards Freddicini had changed; it wasn't like she had woken up one day and instead of wanting to shove him into a locker she had wanted to kiss him against one.
It had been gradual, like cooking a good stew; it had taken a long time for whatever she was feeling to brew inside of her, and though she had tried to deny it at first it was getting harder and harder to ignore the enticing prospect of Al Freddo stew with each passing day. She had fallen for the nub, and she had fallen hard. Damn stew.
Not that what she was feeling mattered, anyway, she told herself whenever she looked at him and her stomach dropped; Benson was still head over heels in love with Carly, and probably always would be. Sam just hoped it was Freddie that walked past her in the woods today, so she could take some of her pent up frustration on him - paintball assassin style.
Sam was so caught up in focusing on the path ahead of her, paintball gun held against her ready to strike, that she didn't notice the rustling behind her growing louder and louder with the predator's each step. It seemed that Sam wasn't the only one on the hunt.
"Got you!" a voice yelled, as Sam was pulled out of her greenery surrounded hiding place and onto her feet.
"Argh! What the hell-" she screamed, before spinning around to see whose nose she had to break. "BENSON?"
"You rang?" Freddie asked, smirking as he effortlessly pulled her over his shoulders and began walking away in the direction he had come.
"What the fatcake do you think you're doing, Freddifer? Put me down, or you will regret ever being born!" Sam snarled at him, kicking her legs in the air in an attempt to struggle out of Freddie's iron grip. It didn't help that this sudden closeness to her favourite nub was making Sam's heart beat twice as fast, and the mixture of cinnamon and whatever flowery laundry detergent Mrs Benson used was making the butterflies, no, suicidal birds in her stomach go bat-chiz crazy.
"Make me, Sam," Freddie grinned at her, turning his head so he smirk at her, revelling in his new found strength against the blonde headed demon.
Sam growled at Freddie again, but stopped suddenly as a thought popped into her currently upside down head. Grinning manically, Sam reached down and grabbed Freddie's underwear, pulling it upwards to give him a wedgie he was sure never to forget.
"ARGH!" Freddie screamed, dropping Sam to the leaf covered forest floor and grabbing his behind, trying to maintain the dignity he had left.
Chuckling, Sam pulled herself to her feet and brushed herself down. She then promptly stormed up to Freddie, shoving him against a nearby tree, anger leaking from every pore of her body.
"What exactly was going through your nerd head when you decided to grab me and pick me up against my will?" Sam asked angrily, pulling her protective clear plastic goggles from her head and pushing Freddie's chest once more to make her point.
Still rubbing his backside, Freddie quickly replied, "It was my job to take you out, ok? We're already one man down and Spencer knew you were our greatest threat, so I've been tracking you and waiting to… pounce." His voice dropped lower and lower as he finished the sentence, as if realising how stupid it was to pounce on Sam when she had a paintball gun at hand.
"It's not my fault your team's one member down," Sam told him, trying to ignore the glow she often felt spreading through her when Freddie and her verbally sparred, "If Gibby had just followed the Health and Safety regulations and kept his shirt in, you would have been just fine," she finished, poking him hard in the chest.
Freddie snorted, also removing his goggles, "Like your one to adhere to the Health and Safety regulations, Puckett," he said, glancing at the ground where the litter from Sam's lunch was spread in a circle around him.
Sam glared at him, trying to think of a way to punish the dip head, but couldn't help but hear the little voice in the back of her head comment on how much Freddie had changed. He never would have pulled this kind of stunt a few years ago, let alone fight his own battles in an argument; back then he still quaked in his Galaxy Wars themed boots whenever she entered the room.
Did this mean he wasn't scared of her anymore? This new prospect puzzled Sam, as she wasn't sure if she should be pleased of angry about it. It was true that Freddie would probably like her more if she just stopped with the incessant pranking and insults, but she wasn't going to change and be more Carly-esque just to please the nerd. As he had said himself, their lives just wouldn't be the same without her making his life hell, although more recently their insult matches had been meet with smiling faces as opposed to angry ones. Still, their new found friendship, (well, they had always been friends - new found acceptance about their friendship) and Freddie's ever growing biceps did not give him the right to treat her like… well, like a girl.
She was Samantha freaking Puckett, and she would be damned if she'd let this dishrag try to win a paintball war with brute strength. That was her territory.
Sam sighed, the anger she felt about Freddie's actions slowly seeping out of her as she saw what could only be described as mock fear in his eyes at the sight of her fist raised, ready to punch the living daylights out of him. Beating him up would've made her feel better in the past, but now she just felt a gnawing in her gut whenever she caused him enough physical pain to make bruises show. Guilt.
She actually felt guilty for hurting the stupid nub, because even thought he was probably strong enough to fight against her, he never did. He let her do it just so she could keep her pride, and proud she was after managing to take out a guy who was almost twice her size.
Freddie truly was a good friend, as he allowed himself to face practically daily physical pain, though not as much as he pretended to feel, just so Sam could hold her head high as she walked away. Another reason to add to the long list of reasons why she fallen so hard for the dork. Stupid dork and his stupid gentlemanly ways.
Sam let her fist drop, which caused Freddie to give her a surprised look, followed by a suspicious one.
"I'll let you off," Sam said quietly, unable to meet Freddie's eyes, "Just this once. As you were working on Spencer's orders and this is a game." She quickly looked up and glared at him, "But don't think I'm getting all soft on you Benson, ok?"
Freddie grinned at her and nodded, but quickly hid his smile, fearing Sam's sudden forgiving streak would end when she saw the happiness on his face. He didn't mind Sam's beatings, not to say he enjoyed them, but if he had to suffer through a few punches and kicks to get to spend more time with her, the more the merrier. And she had only ever broken a bone once, by complete accident, and when it happened she had apologised profusely. Freddie believed her completely, as Sam wasn't usually one for apologies.
Their relationship had altered over the years; he couldn't deny that, and the only thing stopping Freddie from altering it further by finally admitting to the world, and to himself, that he had a 'thing' for one Samantha Puckett was the fear of what she would do to him afterwards.
Although they no longer hated each other, he was unsure if they ever had to be quite honest, what Sam felt for him was a comfortable friendship, and nothing more, he was almost positive of that. Plus, she still thought he was 'in love' with Carly, even though that ship had sailed long ago as it was nothing more than an infatuation of sorts in his pre-teen years.
Freddie had faced many internal struggles about telling Sam the truth, but he didn't want to lose her by coming out of the proverbial hidden feelings closest and proclaiming his feelings for her, as he knew it would break their friendship forever if he did. He'd rather have her close to him, despite having to remain very much in the friend zone, then having to live without her at all.
"So, time for you to leave, Fredward," Sam stated, startling Freddie out of his thoughts as she pushed him back in the direction he had come, "Play times over. If you haven't stolen our team's flag then I really don't care what you're doing."
"Not so fast Sam," Freddie said quickly, turning around to face her, "I was given a mission, and I am going to complete it whether you like it or not."
"Please, Freddiccini, you couldn't take me out if you tried. I am the Queen of Paintball Assassin," Sam laughed at him, shoving him playfully and holding up her paintball gun in victory.
"That's why I made Plan B," Freddie replied, a smile growing on his face.
Sam's eyes narrowed, but before she could tell him that if his second plan was anything like his first he was going to fail just as epically, Freddie snatched Sam's paintball gun from her hands and ran away as fast as his khaki coloured legs could carry him.
Taken by complete surprise, Sam stood there, her mouth ajar in shock. Then, out of nowhere, a laugh erupted from her as she realised what the nub had done.
"You are unbelievable, Fredinstein!" she called out into the forest, before chasing after him, a grin still plastered to her face.
At the sound of Sam's laughter, Freddie grinned, as he knew his plan could have ended in two ways - Angry Sam or Playful Hunter Sam. He was happy it was the latter.
As the pair of them zig zagged through the trees in an odd game of tag with a twist, Sam was reminded of their youth together. Whether it was a game of hide and seek or some seemingly extremely serious argument, they always seemed to be chasing each other in some way or another. At times it seemed like they would never catch up with one another and they were doomed to face this game of catch me if you can for the rest of their lives. She just hoped that one day one of them would stop running, even if she's was far too afraid to do it herself.
With Sam gaining on him, Freddie tried to pick up the pace, but he knew it was no good. With two heavy paintball guns in tow, Sam was sure to catch up to him eventually and the blood bath would begin. Or would it? She had seemed in high spirits when she had laughed at his poor attempt to steal her gun, and she had forgiven his early misdemeanour's Maybe she'll just grab her gun and storm off, or-
Freddie's thoughts were interrupted by what felt like a truck hitting him side on and tackling him to the ground. A truck with long blonde hair and a mischievous laugh as she playfully tried to wrestle the paintball gun out of Freddie's grip. So much for that theory.
They wrestled for a while; both laughing at the situation they were in and how they must look, and with Sam now straddling Freddie trying to twist the gun from his hands he felt like the luckiest guy in the world. That is until the paintball gun went off and sent a purple blur through the air, grazing his shoulder and lightly dusting Sam's fingertips.
"You ok, Freddie?" Sam asked, genuine concern in her voice as the struggling stopped so that Freddie could check his shoulder was still intact.
"It just grazed me, its fine," he replied, circling his shoulder around a few times to ensure nothing was torn or broken.
"Good," Sam responded, before grinning at him madly, "Because I'm going to kill you, Benson!"
Paintball guns forgotten on the forest floor, the pair began to wrestle once more, and were pretty well even matched, although neither of them were really using the full amount of strength they had at their disposal.
Freddie managed to pull himself up, dragging a delirious Sam with him, who was still in a fit of laughter, grabbing her by the elbows and slamming her against a tall oak tree.
Winded by the run and struggle, both parties were breathing heavily as they stared into each other's eyes, smiles still playing on their lips.
The sudden silence hung in the air heavily, and Sam quickly tore her gaze from Freddie's, staring at the ground instead to cover the awkwardness that had come over her. Trust her to end up in a semi-romantic situation with a guy she was majorly totally butt crazy in love with, but held only platonic feelings for her. Wait, did she just say love?
Sam still wasn't meeting his eyes, so Freddie took this time to gaze at the girl he was in love with but could never tell, a small smile on his lips that spread to his shining eyes. Her hair had grown even longer in the summer heat, reaching just above her waist, the long blonde curls trailing down to the small of her back.
Her beautiful blue eyes, though he could no longer see them, sparkled at him in the back of his mind; the exact shade had been fixated in his memory for years now. Her lips were chapped; Sam Puckett was not the kind of girl to carry lip gloss with her, bite marks dotted around due to her habit of chewing on her lips when she was nervous. Freddie had always found that incredibly sexy.
Freddie breathed deeply, and rested his hands on the tree bark, one on either side of Sam, who was still avoiding his eyes, causing him to step even closer to her. It's now or never, he thought, and before he could change his mind he closed his eyes, bent his head down and caught her lips in his own.
Sam's eyes remained open in shock for a few seconds, but they quickly fluttered shut as she fell into what felt like a coma of happiness, returning the sweetest kiss she had ever received with much gusto.
Mirroring their first kiss on the fire escape, though Freddie was much more assertive this time around, Freddie kept his hands on the tree trunk while Sam's arms lay at her side, too shocked to move.
As they parted, Freddie opened his eyes and felt his stomach drop at the sight of Sam, lips parted and eyes still firmly shut.
"I'm sorry… I don't know, I mean… I didn't-" Freddie stuttered, grasping for an excuse to give to Sam before she opened her eyes and broke his arm.
Sam slowly opened her eyes, and caught sight of the quickly reddening Freddie who was now talking some form of gibberish, his mouth forming odd shapes as if it was unable to create actual words.
Smiling, she reached out and lightly brushed her thumb against Freddie's bottom lip, the purple colouring that had stained her fingertips transferring slightly onto his pale pink skin. She then took hold of the nape of his neck and connected their lips once more.
Still reeling from the first kiss, Freddie was completely frozen during the first few moments of the second, but soon responded by grabbing Sam's waist and pulling her closer to him. Sam smiled into the kiss, and pulled both her arms around his neck, deepening the kiss further.
Pressing her into the tree trunk, Freddie played with the long tendrils of Sam's hair that hung down her back in a way he had always dreamed of doing, while Sam tried to work out whether or not she had fallen asleep at her post and this was all a dream. A heavenly dream that pleased Mama on many levels. It seemed Freddie stew tasted just as good as she had always imagined.
Finally parting from each other only when breath was needed in order to remain living and upright, Freddie leaned his forehead against Sam's, swaying slightly with their arms still around each other.
Sam reluctantly removed one arm to playfully punch him in the chest, before whispering "Took you long enough," to her favourite nub.
Smiling, Freddie looked up at her and jokingly replied, "Sorry for not going after you sooner, for fear of my life!"
"I could never kill you, Freddimama," Sam said, her arms now casually draped over his shoulder, "Then who would bring me fat cakes from the store and give me back rubs?"
Freddie chuckled, and pulled Sam into a warm embrace, kissing her temple lovingly.
"Don't go getting all mushy on me, nerd," Sam warned, secretly wanting to run away screaming with joy like every other teenage girl in the universe. Hormones, she thought, mentally rolling her eyes.
"I won't," Freddie promised, talking into her hair, "Just as long as you promise to stop with the wedgies."
Sam laughed, "Where would the fun be in that?" she asked, before reaching down to give Freddie a Texan wedgie, her speciality. He quickly caught her hands from behind his back and pulled them in front of him, kissing her knuckles softly. She rolled her eyes, and pushed him away, leaning against the tree that had supported her during their little tryst.
Suddenly, sounds of whooping were heard from the red camp, quickly followed by the sound of paintballs flying through the air. Sam and Freddie spun around, trying to decipher what was going on at the girl's camp while they had been… otherwise occupied.
"Sounds like the blue team have your flag, Puckett," Freddie chuckled, and Sam grimaced before quietly saying, "Damn. Carly is going to kill me."
"It's not your fault you were too busy making out with your favourite tech producer to bother about winning a paintball match," Freddie grinned at her, eyebrows wiggling suggestively.
"So was that your plan all along," Sam asked, eyebrow raised, "Distract me with your charming ways and dashing good looks while Spencer and Brad grabbed the flag."
"Plan C - kiss the enemy. Never fails. Wait, did you just call me handsome, Puckett?"
"In your dreams, Benson! Wait," Sam stopped joking around with Freddie, a serious look on her face, "If Spencer and Brad are at our camp, who's guarding your flag?"
Freddie sighed, and grabbed her in a quick hug, "It was supposed to be Gibby, but since he was banned from actually playing we just kind of left it unguarded. Why?"
Sam grinned, and pulled away from Freddie, pulling her goggle form her belt and placing them firmly on her head.
"Mama's gotta go, Benson. I've got a flag to catch."
Freddie stared at her, mouth open in shock as he realised he had given away his team's entire strategy. Before Sam could escape to the raid the blue team's camp, Freddie quickly grabbed her arm, causing her to turn and look at him.
"We're going to talk about this, right? I mean, about us?" Freddie asked nervously, looking into Sam's eyes seriously.
"What's there to talk about?" Sam asked innocently, before grinning at him, "Loser of paintball is buying the winner a round of smoothies at the Groovy Smoothie. And Mama plays to win, Benson."
She kissed Freddie on the cheek, and then ran off into through vegetation, screaming, "RED TEAM!" at the tops of her lungs,
Freddie laughed at his demon, before calling out "You can run, but you can't hide Princess Puckett. I'll get that flag back!"
Sam looked over her shoulder, and turned around, sauntering over to Freddie quickly and grabbing his shirt by the collar, kissing him passionately. Caught off guard, Freddie didn't react, and as she pulled away Sam whispered, "You'll have to catch me first, nub," before pushing him to the ground.
Freddie's usually strong stance had been upset by the blonde whirlwind that had literally made him weak at the knees with the use of her wily feminine ways, and as she ran into the forest laughing, he laughed with her.
Getting up from the ground and dusting himself off, Freddie set off after the blonde headed demon of his dreams, paintball gun at the ready and with a huge grin plastered to his face. Sam might still be running, but as long as Freddie got to catch up to her once in a while, he was perfectly content with their new found relationship.
One day, however, Sam would just have to accept that Freddie had finally captured her heart for good. And that he had no intention at all of ever letting it go.
So there it is, my first story. Did you like it? THEN YOU CAN HAVE SOME BANANA! Are you going to review? THEN YOU CAN HAVE SOME BANANA! (Note - This will only make sense if you watch Dan Scheider's videos on YouTube..!) What was your favourite part or line?
Please Review, Click the Blue! (My lame attempt at a Firefly pun!)
Thanks for reading! SEDDIE! SPAGHETTI!
~ Mim