Disclaimer: I don't own Bunnicula, whoever wrote it does (duh). J.K. owns all H.P. characters (lucky her). Remus owns me (Leslie) *sigh, and I own Kayli. She's my slave. Mwhehehehehehehehehe!(j/k Kayli owns herself, I guess…or does she?)
A/N: Just another crazy story from the unknown depths of my demented mind. :P
Go Suck On a Vegetable
"Come'ere, boy! Come on! Get the treat!" Remus Lupin bounded off his four poster bed, across the room, and lept up to grab the steak out of Sirius Black's raised hand. At the last minute Sirius pulled it out of his way, and Remus landed on the floor, empty mouthed and eyes glowing gold. He let out a long, loud, spine-tingling howl and lept, not at the steak, but at Sirius' throat just as James Potter walked in.
"Moony!" James yelled, and he ran over and grabbed Remus out of the air right before he got to Sirius' throat. Quickly he grabbed the meat out of Sirius' hand and tossed it to Remus. "What were you thinking?!" he exclaimed, "That's the fourth time this week!"
"Sorry. I was just trying to train him. You know, so he wouldn't have to go away all alone every month." Sirius replied.
"Oh, yeah! Like a tame werewolf?! Sure." His tone softened when he saw Sirius' face fall. "Listen, Sirius, how do you think Moony would feel if he ripped your throat out? Besides, the animagus potion will be ready next year, and we'll be able to be with him on full moons."
"Yeah, I guess." Sirius relented
Meanwhile, Remus had regained power over his body from Wolfie and had been listening to them, confused at first, but when he tasted the meat in his mouth, he realized what had happened. "Sirius! Not again! I don't feel like almost violently and painfully ripping one of my best friends apart and eating him. Besides, I'm a vegetarian on Wednesdays."
"Okay, sorry, but you just gave me a great idea…" Sirius said with a mischievous grin. He ran down the stairs and out through the portrait drumming his fingertips together (A/N: Like Mr. Burns on the Simpsons when he says, "Excellent…") and chuckling a deep, evil chuckle. Chuckling a deep, evil chuckle that can only be one chuckle that only one chuckler chuckles. A chuckle that means the chuckler is up to know good. Remus and James followed shortly behind him and found his in the last place you would think you'd find Sirius…THE LIBRARY!
"What in God's name are you doing here?!" James exclaimed.
"Sirius, I'm surprised and proud, and somewhat afraid for my life." Remus said with a grin, "What book you got there?"
"Bunnicula! I remember reading it in muggle school before I came here, and you being a vegetarian reminded me of it for some reason…"
"What's it about?" asked James.
In one breath, Sirius said, "It's about a cute little bunny with red eyes, and a cat, and a dog, and the bunny's a vampire but not a people vampire, and it sucks all the juice out of vegetables, and it's name is Bunnicula, and, and…" Sirius stopped for a breath.
"Whoa, calm down! That's all very interesting and all, but what does it have to do with us?"
Remus had a very worried look on his face, and he began to think, 'That's crazy. I know that look, and whatever prank he's forming that has to do with that book can't be good…I'm guessing I'm gonna be the one doing it, too…'
"…oh, and Moony? You're gonna be the one who has to do it." Sirius
Remus thought, 'I guessed right.' Then answered, "Two questions: do what, and why me?"
"Moony! Weren't you listening?"
"Nope. Too busy worrying."
"About what?"
"You."
"Oh, okay. To answer your questions: suck the juice out of all the vegetables in the school, and because you're a vegetarian today, and James and I hate vegetables."
A snort was all the response they got from Remus.
"Does that mean you'll do it?"
grunt
"Great! Thanks, Moony!"
A/N: Will this plan work? Will they get caught and get yet another detention? And what kind of bunny sucks the juice out of vegetables? Stay tuned to find out!