Title: The real you.
Author: TEH CaRWash Queen. Bow for me!
Disclaimer: Sure I am the one totally screwing up the show and making the CaRWash ship sink. Do you really believe that? Didn't think so.
Summary: He had thrown it all away, like a letter gone wrong, thrown over his shoulder, but he knew he could find it back somewhere stuffed into a corner. He could smooth it out and re-read it, and realize that it wasn't that bad after all. It wasn't perfect, but with a few adjustments it could make for a nice piece of work.
A/N: Missing scene from 602 'Cyber-Lebrity'. Because it was our first real moment of season 6.
He could still feel her fingers touching his. Her hand lightly supporting his, so she could take samples of the DNA under his fingernails. She had been wearing gloves, so he hadn't really felt her skin, but he had sensed her warmth even through the layer of latex separating their fingertips. The warmth that usually her entire body emitted, the warmth that her smile radiated…the one she had smiled to him today.
It had been too long since she'd flashed him that smile, too long since she'd acted nice and open towards him. Way too long, and he knew it was his own mistake. But he also knew that he was well on his way to make it up to her. To everyone, but especially to her.
He stared at his hand, like he had been for the past couple of minutes. He had left the lab, but he hadn't left the premises. He was standing in the corner of the steps leading into the Miami Dade Crimelab, leaning back against the wall, and staring at his hand. He could still feel her, and he loved the feeling.
They had held on longer than he'd expected. He was positive that she would scrape his nails, and get out of the room as soon as she could. He was surprised enough at Eric staying, and even more at Eric joking with him, but somewhere in the back of his mind he couldn't help but wonder why Eric had stayed. Had he gotten territorial over Calleigh? If he had, he certainly wasn't doing a good job. Jake had already entered the forbidden section.
But they had held hands for so long. It probably wasn't more than a minute but it had felt like hours to him, just feeling her gentle touch. It was no secret that she was the only reason he had enjoyed his time at the lab. He loved doing what they did, but without her it wouldn't have been as appealing as it had been with her around.
He had thrown it all away, like a letter gone wrong, thrown over his shoulder, but he knew he could find it back somewhere stuffed into a corner. He could smooth it out and re-read it, and realize that it wasn't that bad after all. It wasn't perfect, but with a few adjustments it could make for a nice piece of work. And that's all he was aiming for now. Work. His dream job to be his real job again. Because there was nothing in the world he could see himself doing, really doing, for a long term and enjoying it, except being a CSI. Except being a CSI, with Calleigh as his partner.
He focused on his hand again and smiled weakly. Her touch, that gentle squeeze before she'd let go. It had been unnoticeable for the outer-eye, but he had noticed. They were very excited to get him back there. She was very excited to get him back there, and he promised himself, no matter what, he would never give it up again. He would never give her up.
"What are you still doing here?"
Her voice…warm and caring, just like her touch had been. He couldn't decide which he liked more. Her touch was…tangible, he could take her hand in his, he could feel her touch, but her voice…when she spoke, especially in her southern accent, it touched him just as much.
"Ryan?"
"Yeah, sorry."
"Got your head up in the clouds, huh?"
"Kind of."
He grinned at her, the same wide grin he had given her earlier, in the lab. He didn't get to use it often, but Calleigh had a tendency of drawing it out of him. Luckily, or at least he thought, he had the ability to, with his grin, retract a smile from her lips. And indeed the corners of her mouth crept up.
"I asked what you're still doing here. We've got the DNA."
"So you don't need me anymore?"
"You know that was not what I meant." She said, her arms crossed peacefully across her chest.
"It's the truth, right?"
"For this case, no, we don't need you anymore, but when you say it, it sounds so much more aggressive."
"It's a talent."
She shook her head smiling and then just looked at him. And he looked back. It must have been a really odd sight for strangers, two persons just looking at each other like that; one leaned back against the wall, the other with crossed arms not too far away.
"So, do you really want me back, or were you just saying that, before?"
"I do. I do really want you back at the lab, we all do. We miss you."
"Well you have no idea how much I miss you."
She probably thought he meant the team, but he meant it singular. He missed her presence, her comforting words.
"I'm sure we'll be a team again soon. They won't possibly take an entire year to go through your paychecks. It's not like they're gonna find something anyway…are they?"
"No, of course not!"
"I'm sorry. It's not like we know what to and what not to expect anymore."
He swallowed, hurt. She had always had the ability to read him like an open book. Did she lose that ability because had gambled? That didn't make sense. He was still the same person, still Ryan Wolfe, just…just Ryan Wolfe without a job.
"Well if you want to expect that they'll find something on my paychecks then go ahead."
"Stop twisting my words. Of course I don't want them to find something. You know very well that I'm your friend and I don't want anything bad happening to you."
"It already did.' He breathed softly.
Calleigh's look changed sympathetically.
"Horatio's gonna turn it back, you know he will."
"I know he'll try."
"And I know he'll succeed."
"How soon?"
"Be patient Ryan."
Ryan pushed himself away from the wall so he stood upright. He looked Calleigh deep into her eyes and she stared right back, searching for the answer.
"I meant it when I said I missed the place, Cal. Everything. From the rhythmic beeping of machines to the horrific smell of blood, from Eric blowing up at me to you…to you making my day worth it."
A blush appeared on Calleigh's cheeks.
"Just keep yourself out of trouble for a while…no, just keep yourself out of trouble, period."
"Trouble has a tendency to come search for me, so it seems."
"You're easy to manipulate, Ryan. If someone says it will be good for you, you believe it."
"So, what, I should just stop believing people?"
"No. You should start believing the right people, and asking them for help."
Ryan nodded and shoved his hands into his pockets. "I need your help."
"I know that." Calleigh confirmed. "I was just waiting for you to start asking for it."
"I lost myself. I chose the wrong outlet, but it's not that easy to get out."
"Do you have any more debts?"
"I paid off my last one yesterday. I'll have to live on dry bread and water for the coming five years, but at least no one can blackmail me anymore."
Calleigh smiled. "I think I can spare a little butter for your dry bread."
"I need a reason not to gamble again, Cal."
"You already have a reason. This, this building, this job. You say you miss it. You can get it back, but the only way is to never gamble again. Because if you do, you will lose it all, for good this time."
"That's a fairly good reason, isn't it?"
"And there's another reason. If you ever break your promise never to do it again, I won't ever talk to you again. I'm all for second chances, but not third. At that point you've ruined it."
"I feel like I'm on chance 300 already." Ryan sighed.
"Then be glad I still see it as chance 2."
Calleigh turned her head when the doors opened and Horatio stepped out. He nodded politely to Ryan, who greeted him, before turning to Calleigh.
"We need you inside."
"I'll be there in a minute." She promised.
"Make that half a minute."
Horatio smiled somewhat and went back inside. Calleigh shook her head and faced Ryan again. "You heard the boss."
"Go, I'll see you later."
"Keep tomorrow free in your agenda. It's my day off, we're going to do a thorough search for the real you, because it seems like you've lost him."
"I'll dig up my magnifying glass."
"Very funny Ryan."
She stepped back and opened the lab's doors, walking in. She looked over her shoulder and saw Ryan waving at her through the glass. She smiled and winked at him, before meeting up with Eric down the hall. She had to get back to work, although tomorrow promised to be a harder task than anything Horatio needed today. But she was ready for it.
Because she too, could still feel his fingers touching hers.
A/N: The scene was in the episode, really. Didn't you see it? You must not have paid attention. So for you, I wrote it down ;-)