Harry and the Chamber of Crumpets By Red

Disclaimer: This is the second to the four of the retellings of the Harry Potter stories from the assorted authors of Black Sparkles and I'm the only one who can actually start writing her book apparently. These stories are based on an inside joke gone way too far. The characters belong to JK (a saint), Matrix references belong to whoever made it, Monty Python references belong to Monty I suppose, but the joke is MIIIINE!. So sit back, relax, and enjoy, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Crumpets.

No sit back, recline...

Are you relaxed?

You don't look relaxed.

That's better.

But don't fall asleep!

Yes, like that.

Grab a snack, get a drink!

We like our readers to be happy!

Happy, happy, happy!