Phantom's Guide to a Mary-Sue's
'Allo! Shadow here. This is inspiration from a Lord of the Rings guide and "Mary sue is not an Energizer Bunny!". The thing is that there are a lot of Mary-Sue's running around the opera house and I intend to save all of the newbie writers from writing a Sue which they will be forced to live with for their fan fiction career. I'm also creating a guide for veteran Reads and writers to recognize whether or not they have in inevitably created a Sue. Here to help me and basically criticize every thing I say is our favorite dark cloaked fiend and opera ghost extraordinaire, Erik!
Erik: what on God's green earth makes you think I'm going to help you?
The fact that I have your original copy of Don Juan Triumphant locked up in my top drawer and the only way you're going to get it back is if you play nice and help.
Erik: (pause) Have I told you lately that I loath you?
Every single day of my life. Now on with the show!
The Breeds
Standard Sue: This Sue is the first and probably most commonly used Sue of them all. In such cases this bright eyed and silken haired lady, usually in her late teens to early twenties, will take the place of Christine in the famous love triangle between Raoul and Erik. Thus making Christine totally useless to the plot and generally if she is used she will become Sue's best friend, or other wise she disappears off the face of the Earth. Our loved Sue will not only catch the eyes of both Raoul and Erik, but also every male member of the opera house cast and staff. Though disturbingly enough the managers are clearly resistant to Sue's charms outside of giving her main roles without an audition process.(Me: hmmm… You sure Firmin and Monchrim are strait? Erik:…)
Love interests: Mainly Erik though generally Raoul or some new character will vie valiantly for her attention.
Dark Past: In keeping with the Christine Daae Complex usually.
Can it be written with success? Generally? No. Though some readers like the sappy descriptions and inner turmoil stretched to fit forty chapters or more, most readers will flame the author before the Sue so much as lays on eye on a black cloak.
Common: Very, unfortunately.
Tragically Handicapped Sue: Also common this sue will have something wrong with them. Most common of these handicaps is blindness so they cannot see Erik's mask or deformity (Me: erm… I mean his striking appearance…SORRY! Erik: Give me the keyboard…NOW! Me: No and it had to be said admit it! Erik: KEYBOARD NOW WOMAN!). Just as common are muteness and paralysis of the lower body so the Sue cannot dance. These Sues if not mute, though sometimes in a miraculous temporary healing, will have voices better than Christine's. Even if blind they have eyes so brilliant that it amazes the reader that she can't see. Christine may or may not show up in these phics and her status as married or unmarried depends on the authoress. These Sues are nearly a dime a dozen and will become a sort of daughter or silent companion to Erik, making later chapters of romance very creepy.
Love interests: Erik is this Sue's main victim, blinding him with their silent beauty or by accident they will find a way to get back to his lair where they will make themselves completely at home.
Dark Past: Given their handicaps a dark past is assured. Most of it will be shadowed with being a social outcast.
Can it be written with success? I suppose it could if the Authoress would come up with a believable back story for the Sue's ailment, to many Sues are born with it or got it from a horrible horse riding accident. Unfortunately the general out of character ness they make Erik go through is disgusting to say the least. They often make him out to be a gentle as a lamb when we all know Erik would strangle you so much as look at you if you made it to his home. (Erik: That's true.)
Common? Unfortunately for Erik's sake yes.
Futuristic Sue: This Sue became possible because someone had the bright idea to send themselves back through time. This is possible through various freak acts of nature including storms, faulty electrical equipment, magical items found in ordinary places, and if the author can't think of anything good a vortex just popping up in someone's side walk. These Sue's are transported back in time to land both at Erik's doorstep (and quite frequently on his lap) or somewhere in the generally facility of the opera house. They will audition for the opera and land a main role even if they have had no operatic training at all. Christine will become public enemy number one, but since sue is too nice to actually hate anyone it is Christine who is the meeny.( Yeah Christine can be a real witch rolls eyes the girls is barely able to tell fact from fiction). Unfortunately for Erik laying one eye on this Sue will make him immediately forget about Christine and try to woo the Sue.
Love Interests: Generally Erik with a few original characters thrown in.
Dark Past: Not necessary, but can be put in for the sake of drama and tension. Sometimes parents will be divorced or someone was abusive in there futuristic life. Other than that most Sue's from the future will have lead happy lives.
Can it be written with success? Some writers have pulled off the time travel issue pretty well. The reason for these being a success is that the everyday phan can relate to the character if believable. If one were to use this story line it would only be a good phic if the characters weren't sues but more believable. If Christine is given a deeper more interesting character it also can be enjoyable.
Common? Can be.
High school wannabe Sue: Where do I start with this one… This Sue is closely related to Futuristic Sue only she doesn't go back in time. This Sue is generally still in high school, thus her name, and is the shy girl in the back row of the choir. She is either a Christine knock off or a close impression of the authoress. The Sue may either audition for or some how get the part of Christine in Phantom of the Opera which has been conveniently planned for the Sue's junior or senior year. This sets up the theme of having the cute Raoul like jock who, for some reason yet unknown has auditioned for the musical, and Sue met back when she was ten tries to go out with her. Meanwhile the punk rock Erik with his quiet intensity will convince her to come to some music lessons.
Love interests: Thankfully in this version Erik isn't the main target. High school guys with low self esteem and heavenly voices are the choice prey. Depending on the Authoress's preference the Sue may also go with Raoul ( Blinks Hey Erik? Have you ever met a Raoul fan? Erik: a what? Me: A Raoul fan… I thought they were a myth. Erik: I think there may be a few in Iowa… but I could be wrong.)
Dark past: Sometimes, her parents will either have issues or not mentioned at all.
Can it be written with success? If the author captures the true essence of the characters, not putting them to out of character. They may have trouble with the romance in later chapters because after all, all of them are in high school.
Common? Yeah…
Soapratic Sue: These Sues are generally daughters of Raoul and Christine. Due to unforeseen events they will have to return to the opera house and either
A)become a Prima Ballerina or Pima Donna
B)Seek out Erik because of some reason still unknown, he is her only hope. (Help me Luke Skywalker! Oh wait wrong genre)
As soon as she walks in the door men start falling at her feet begging her to be theirs. Erik however will mistake her for his angel and kidnap her. When back in his lair it will take a lot of talking to convince him that she's not Christine. Erik at this point is so enamored with Sue that he will forget that he is furious that she is not who he thought she was, he will then help her with whatever she wishes. The major problem with Soapratic Sue is that she is very soap opera in her design and readers can be turned off by the "I loved your mother so by fault I love you now" Ideas coupled with her.
Love interest: Erik, of course. (Erik: WHY? Me:…Erik: are you drooling? Me: Sorry fell into a phantom induced stupor Erik: …)
Dark past: With Raoul and Christine as her parents her past has to be dark… (Erik : elbows authoress me: Sorry I couldn't resist.)
Can it be written with success? OH! The sappiness! Unless you find a rare group of phans that both love Erik and "All my children" it probably can't.
Common? I've seen enough to make this sue official, but mercifully these sues seem to be only the brain child of new writers that aren't that creative.
Alien Sue: Here we go. These Sues are a bit rarer but there still out there. This particular breed of sues are daughters of lords and ladies, more then likely English. Obviously these sues were invented to escape the Soapratic Sue title. Alien Sue will have tons of money at Daddy's bank but since she has run away to the opera populaire (yeah, cause that's the first place you think to runaway too) she is unable to access it. As with the other Sues she is gorgeous and talented and can land a main role with out training because Mommy thought it wouldn't be proper to teach a girl about music. Now that she is here she is free to release her passion for music while attracting the attention of Erik. Christine may either become a best friend or be married at the time the Sue comes. Information on this breed is incomplete but I'll keep researching so you won't have to. (Me It's a cruel fate I face and I shall see it through till the end. With a brave face and a study supply of sugar, even if I sacrifice my sanity for it. Erik: No you're not dramatic at all, it's a wonder you're just an understudy. Me: Meh, life is a pain at times.)
Love interests: Erik or if the authoress is merciful an original character. But Mary-Sue's being the impression of the Authoress they will of course go for Erik.
Dark Past: Sometimes. These sues are more apt to the arrange marriages or over protective Father than any actual hurt in their lives.
Can it be written with success? It can be done with taste but a lot of out of character ness to pull it off. Too much OOC and readers will flame.
Common? These pretty rare, but still exist.
So tell me what you think? Be warned flames will be used to heat my house since our furnace broke. If I missed a few breeds of Mary-Sues please tell me so I can include them in the next chapter. I'm thinking the next section will be dedicated to dissecting Sues ravishing good looks, and finding just what make every man fall in love with this disgusting piece of over baked imagination. With more snarky commentary from Erik and I of course.