A/N: One-shot set after "The Commitment Determination"
For the first time since his 45 day train journey, this was the longest time Sheldon had been apart from Amy. And just like every day on that journey he was missing her. He was missing the sweet sound of her voice, and the savory smell of Amy's perfume whenever she walked by.
"Bye Sheldon". Was the last he had heard from her in over a month. At least she said goodbye before she signed off. Unlike when him when he ran away from Pasadena without a word to Amy regarding where he was going or why.
"How could I have been so dumb?" Sheldon wondered. Lying in his bed clutching a photo of him and Amy from prom. Sheldon knew that when he left Pasadena without telling Amy she would be worried; he would have been frantic if Amy just left and never answered her phone for 45 days. Sheldon is starting to realize how Amy felt. Being gone all that time, and even though Amy said why, Sheldon still couldn't grasp why she was upset. But he knew he wanted her back. He no longer wanted to be apart from Amy. He wanted to feel the happiness he felt when she was around. When he looked into her eyes he felt that the he was where he needed to be. He no longer felt that he was the odd one out. Amy understood him and that's all that mattered.
It was starting to feel like the train trip all over again. He missed Amy. He wished Amy was there with him to make his lonely nights better. He craved being able to have an intellectual conversation with someone at his level. The only difference is Amy is mad now and he knows it. Sheldon did not expect to upset Amy when he left last year. She did not stay mad at him too long after he returned. But it has been over a month and the two haven't spoken since that unforgettable night.
"I miss you" he said running his fingers on the picture, hoping that maybe touching Amy in the picture could give him that same warmth real Amy had. It was no use. Nothing would reciprocate the same feeling as cuddling with real Amy. He couldn't help but think about how Amy was feeling. Was she still mad? Was she out with someone else? Does she miss him as much as he misses her? His thoughts were running wild. All he could think about Amy and what she was doing. He barely slept, he couldn't focus on work, eating was necessary but sometimes he just didn't feel like it.
His bedroom was silent. His pillow damp from tears. Sheldon turned over to his phone laying on the nightstand. No missed calls. No messages. No emails. Nothing from Amy. Sheldon wondered if he should call Amy to see how she was doing. He picked up the phone but all he could do was stare at his background, which showed a picture of Amy flashing her lovely smile.
"I can't. Not right now." Sheldon says, putting his phone back down and turning over to his side. It will be another sleepless night as Sheldon tosses and turns, trying to figure out how to make things right with Amy.