Hey, everyone! This is my first time trying my hand a Shameless fic, so please, let me know if it seems too OOC, not angsty enough, or if it sucks entirely. Oh, and also I need to know if I should even continue it. Right now, I'm not too sure if I should. And if you do want me to write another chapter, should I do it from another family member's point of view or keep it to Ian's?

Thanks a ton, and enjoy!

Ian had always been overlooked. And the fact of the matter was that he is perfectly okay with it. He is content with lurking in the corner, watching, waiting. He was fine with sitting in a chair, and not speaking for hours on end while he watched his parents fight so long ago, and he's fine with it now. But even the most passive of people have their breaking point. Even the best of actors become human.

There are some times when he thinks he doesn't matter. He'll look up from his corner at the happy family that lies before him and think, I'm not really a part of that, am I?

But then Fiona would tear her gaze from baby Liam, flash him a smile and ask, "Hey, you feeling okay?"

And then he'd put on a skin deep grin, though in his mind, it was a grimace, a tear in the mask. "Yeah, I'm fine; just thinkin' that's all,"

Not that he ever really meant it.

Ian sometimes finds himself playing the role of a masochist. I mean, I've ruined anything good that's ever happened, right?

Whenever Kash would grin at him fondly, like he truly matters, it sends warmth to his heart, and a shiver down his spine. It's like a warm fire on a cold winter's night, and even more welcoming.

But I still went and ruined it. I ruined the only thing that made me really, really happy.

The pain runs through his blood, a drug that hardly ever gets used, and he revels in the sound of it.

Now, he wears a mask of spikes, drilling into his face; it's breaking him and he feels the cracks in it but can't bring himself to care. The mask that's sewn from happiness is crushing his world, and he knows he should leave, but there's always his family to worry about.

But to be honest, I'm not sure if they really care.

Deep down, he knew they did; that's only reason he hadn't left when he first started to wear this mask.

He's fine with being overlooked; he's okay with sitting in the corner. Because, at least then, when he finally hits his breaking point, the damage won't be so bad.

Don't forget to lemme know what you think! Review!