I let the bottle fall from my hand, the clear, white liquid dripping out of it, as the bottle made contact with the floor. I laughed as it hit the hard wood floor, and the bottle shattered. If only my life was the way it used to be. But, no, I have this life, now. But I still remember what my life was like.

"Mass?" I looked around the room, happily, I was drunk. "Mass, baby, where are ya?"

"Dude, she left. Like, two hours a go. And she was pissed!"

"Really?" I took a swig of the tan liquid in the red plastic cup I was holding. "Wonder why she left…" I downed the rest of the stuff in my cup, then crushed it in my hand and threw it on the ground.

"Dude! Pick that up, my 'rents are gonna be home in 10 minutes!"

"Whatever. I'm out. Gotta go find Mass. See ya."

"Massie isn't going to want to talk to you. Dude, she's really pissed at you…"

"Huh? Yeah right, like she would be pissed at me… See ya Josh."

My life wasn't always this messed up. At one point I had everything going for me. I had a girlfriend, I was the star on the soccer team, I had okay grades, my parents loved me… I basically had an awesome life. But it was one night; I found out that my girlfriend was cheating on me. With my so-called best friend, Cam. And yeah, Cam was still going out with Claire, making Massie and Cam the worst best friends in the world.

That night I went to someone's party… and I did something I shouldn't have. Before you think that I had a one night stand or something, no. I didn't; but I did start drinking that night. I was only 15, and in one night I was so stoned and drunk, I couldn't even slur my words, let alone say them. But, even with that one bad experience I kept going, and getting drunk and stoned. It's not like my life had a point anymore.

My grades came crashing down after that, following with my stardom on the soccer team. My parents started staying at work later, and going to couples counselling around the same time, so it's not like they really cared anymore. I doubt they even loved me anymore.

But at one point I thought about stopping. Massie didn't know about it yet. So what was I supposed to do when she was apologizing to me. She didn't know I had a beer in my hand, and about 10 unopened ones on the ground. She thought I was mad at her. Guess what? I wasn't. I wanted her back so badly.

"Hey, Derrick? It's me… Massie. Listen, I'm so sorry for what happened… but it was just… I don't know. I'm sorry though, I shouldn't have done it." I could tell she was truly sorry. I just know her like that. "Derrick? I'm really sorry. Please forgive me. I miss you. Please!" I dropped the bottle. I hoped she didn't hear anything. She was pretty close to tears anyway.

"Mass," I turned around "I can't believe you did that to me."

"Please," Massie was sobbing out, between breaths, "Please! I miss you… I just want you back. I promise this won't happen again." Massie was hiding behind her hand, crying, and her mascara was running down her face. Don't girls generally wear waterproof mascara, anyway?

"Massie, it's okay. I just don't know… if you really mean that…" I was staring at the beer. I wanted to taste some right now, going down my throat.

"Derrick, I swear I will be totally faithful to you…"

"Okay Massie. I'll talk to you later, kay?"

"Okay… bye Derrick…"

I returned to my open bottle of beer.

If you can't tell it wasn't exactly the brightest relationship, after I started on all the stuff. But hey, she started me on it all anyway. I really just want Massie to truly love me again. Just like I loved her.