20 Things Reactions Drabbles

by The Fourth Bride

A series of drabbles based on "20 things you should never say to Dracula". Short, sweet and effing hilarious. WARNING: Contains graphic torture. This story is now ABANDONED. If anyone would like to adopt it, please PM me and I'll email you the docs.

1. Stake Choice

20 things you should never say to Dracula if you value your life.

Part 1: Stake of Choice.

"So, Vlad, I'm putting in some pickets for the thornbushes and I need your opinion. Hawthorne, or Wild Rose?"

"What makes you think I would be even remotely interested in lacing the grounds with DEADLY WEAPONS?"

"Ah...well...hehe.... HEY! What are you doing with that?"

"And this is the part where you run."

"AAAAAHHHHHHHH!" slam.

"You can't hide forever."

"Mummy."

Slam. "Found you..."

"Oh shit... hey, what are you...? NOOO not the eyes! MY EYES, I'M BLIND! What are you doing to my foot..?"

"This little piggy went to market..." snap.

"AAHH!"

"This little piggy went home..." snap.

"AAHH!"

finis