A/N Hello all! I'm back, and with a new chaptered fiction! I know what you're thinking: Oh great, another fic to abandon. But this fic shall NOT be abandoned, seeing as I only plan to make it about 5 or 6 chapters. If it exceeds this amount, it shouldn't be more than 10 chapters. However, my goal at the moment is 5-6. This chapter is just an introduction, really. Don't expect much action. Next chapter is when the good stuff starts to happen. Please note that some of this fiction goes against Greek Mythology, and I am well aware of it. For example: Cupid is the Roman form of Eros, who was supposedly Aphrodite's son. However, he's not in my fiction.

Summary: Aphrodite, the goddess of beauty and love, and her fairy friend Cupid wreck havoc on earth. It's just what they do. One day when she is bored, she decides to find a totally original relationship to play with. And that's where all the chaos begins.

Rating: T for possible mild language and adult situations.

Pairings: Artemis/Holly, Artemis/Minerva

Prologue: In Which a Goddess is Bored

Aphrodite sighed. There was absolutely nothing to do! Hera was off torturing Zeus' latest mistress, it was Persephone's time to be with Hades, Iris was somewhere delivering a message (and plus, she was just a messenger), Athena was actually being responsible and taking care of her precious city, she couldn't stand Artemis who was off hunting anyway, and everyone else was either busy or way too boring to be around.

She tapped each finger on the desk rapidly, trying to see if it was even worth asking Aries or Adonis to be her date to a human party in disguise. Maybe I could go by myself. I wouldn't be alone for long… she thought naughtily. Then she dismissed the thought. Humans were so dull sometimes.

Aphrodite got up from her desk and walked over to the mirror. This was a favorite hobby of hers-- she could spend hours looking at her reflection. However, her waist-length wavy golden hair, dark violet eyes, and smooth, creamy skin(1) would not entrance her today like it could normally. She gazed at herself for a moment more, and then went to the western window, which had a spectacular view of the setting sun. Since the very beginning Aphrodite had insisted on a room with three windows: one facing the east, toward the rising sun, one taking up the whole ceiling to see the sun during the day, and one facing the west to observe the setting sun. Needless to say, Aphrodite wanted all the light she could possibly get during the day so that her mirror could be properly viewed.

As the sun dipped under the horizon, Aphrodite suddenly thought of something. Love had always entertained her, mainly because of the vast silliness of it. She was, after all, called the Goddess of Love because she caused other people to fall in love. She herself had never actually fallen. Sure, she had her lovers (mainly Aries and Adonis), but these were mainly about lust. The fact that she had a doting husband also didn't particularly matter. The concept of true love was truly ridiculous in Aphrodite's eyes.

Now, back to her idea. Why not wreck havoc on earth? she thought. She happened to have some fresh arrows, even though she hadn't played this game in a few decades. But she still considered it a fairly regular hobby, seeing that a few decades were like a few days to the immortal.

With this idea in mind, the goddess grabbed her universal (I mean that literally) communicator. She usually used it for prank calling Athena, but today she dialed a number that she hadn't dialed in a while.

The person at the other end picked up after the third ring. "Hello?" answered an auburn haired, pointy-eared individual who was quite good and impossibly young looking for his age of 952.

Aphrodite literally glowed as she smiled at the elf. "Cupid!" she squealed. "I haven't seen you for, like, ten years!"

Cupid smiled, amazed by the goddess' sheer beauty for the millionth time. "It's been 33 years, ma'am," he said.

Aphrodite's smile shrunk dangerously. "Are you correcting me, elf?"

Cupid tried to grin. "Of course not, my lady," he reassured the goddess.

"Good." Her smile was once again huge. Then she sighed theatrically. "Cupid, dear, you don't know how dull my life is at the moment," she complained.

The elf smiled at her sympathetically, simultaneously wondering how anything could be dull for a goddess with that amount of power and charm (not to mention beauty).

"People have long stopped worshipping me, and all of my 'family' really doesn't understand me at all." She pouted.

Cupid's breathing almost stopped. She looked as beautiful as… Well, as the goddess of beauty. Even before Cupid had become the famous Cupid, he had always been a sucker for beautiful things. He was quite easily recruited to Aphrodite's little pets.

"How may I help, my lady?" he asked politely, although he had a pretty big hunch of where this was going.

Aphrodite was all smiles again. Looking directly into Cupid's green eyes with her violets (through the communicator, of course), Aphrodite said, "Dearest elf, our little game has always entertained me greatly."

This confirmed Cupid's suspicion. He and the goddess always referred to making people fall in love as "their little game." A game they hadn't played for roughly three decades.

When do you wish me to come over, my lady?" questioned Cupid.

Aphrodite grinned and snapped her fingers. Instantly, Cupid was right in front of her.

"Must you always ask that question, my dear Cupid?" she asked, embracing the little elf.

"No ma'am," Cupid managed to choke out, totally forgetting that he was supposed to be getting ready for an outing with his wife.

Aphrodite walked over to two armchairs facing a large plasma screen. One of the squashy, crimson armchairs was fairy-sized. She sat down and then tapped the other chair, inviting Cupid to sit down. In between the chairs stood a small mahogany coffee table, on which rested a small keyboard for the plasma screen in front of them. Cupid gladly went to sit by her, wondering who would be the victims of their little game today. He noticed a couple of fresh arrows resting in the corner, and wondered why Aphrodite had them if they hadn't played their game for a while now.

Aphrodite snapped Cupid out of his musings by turning on the plasma screen. The background was pink, with the white shapes of the continents filling the screen. There were six different colored dots covering the continents symbolizing the nature of relationships: gray meant strangers, black meant enemies, light pink meant acquaintances, pink meant friends, hot pink meant more than friends, and red meant love. These dots covered almost every inch of the white continents, so that the only way of knowing that the continents were white was because there were fewer dots in some deserts and frigid areas.

"Where shall we search today?" Aphrodite asked her elfin friend.

Cupid looked at her, surprised. She was letting him pick? That was new… Cupid looked at the screen, thinking. Maybe Peru. Or perhaps California… Ireland! That was, after all, his favorite human country.

"How about Ireland, my lady?" Cupid suggested.

Aphrodite tapped her chin thoughtfully. "Yes, that will do," she agreed. She then selected the country that was Ireland, and the country enlarged to fill the screen.

This next part was the part that always took the longest. Which specific individuals would unknowingly participate in their game this time? Cupid was especially worried about this. In the past, Aphrodite had come up with some really cruel things. One of the lesser examples was Romeo and Juliet, who actually hadn't liked each other at all before they were shot with the arrows. But this hadn't really been cruel—it just complicated their lives and then they ended up killing themselves… No, Cupid remembered one especially horrible time when Aphrodite had had him shoot a man who was already head over heels with another girl. This resulted in the man leaving the heartbroken girl and chasing after her best friend, who didn't even love the man. Both the man and the girl promptly committed suicide after being rejected.

Thinking about this made Cupid anxious. He was, after all, an elf. Elves had the biggest consciences of all sentient beings. But of course, Aphrodite completely ignored that fact and went right along forcing Cupid to mess with other people's love lives.

Aphrodite sighed, got up, and began pacing. "I've seen absolutely everything," she complained. "I need something totally new." She clicked randomly on Dublin, and the area filled the screen.

Aphrodite snapped her fingers. "Of course!" she exclaimed, remembering that she had updated her system so that she could just type in certain conditions and the computer would automatically eliminate relationships that didn't live up to the criteria. The goddess typed in "Unique," fully expecting no results to show up. However, the results were that every single dot on the globe was unique.

She sighed and erased the previous word, then typed in "Never before seen." The result she saw interested her, but interested Cupid even more.

There was a single hot pink dot on the outskirts of Dublin. The words "Fowl Manor" flashed on the bottom of the screen.

Fowl Manor? thought Cupid. Isn't Fowl the Mud Boy who kidnapped my great granddaughter eleven years ago?

Aphrodite smiled and clicked on the little hot pink dot. On the screen came up live feed from a room in the house, showing a 20-year-old human speaking into a… fairy communicator?

"… in a while," the human was saying. "I'm bored," he whined.

"You think I'm not?" replied a female voice from the communicator.

Aphrodite zoomed in and Cupid almost fell out of his chair from shock. The girl on the screen had auburn hair, hazel eyes (although one looked a bit different), pointed ears, and a very pretty face. A face that looked quite a bit like his. It was his great granddaughter, Holly Short.

"I have a desk job, Artemis," Holly kept on saying. "A stupid desk job. You think I don't want a bit of excitement?"

Aphrodite laughed. Not only was the human named after a female goddess, but it was the one goddess who annoyed the underworld out of her.

Cupid frowned. Artemis? So it was the Artemis Fowl who had kidnapped Holly.

Artemis sighed, totally unaware that he was being spied on. "Yes, I suppose you are correct. A desk job is the worst kind of boredom there is."

Holly raised an eyebrow. "Oh really? I was under the impression that you yourself had a desk job."

Artemis winked. "Yes, well, I was speaking about you, of course. For me, I'd much rather have a desk job than be an action hero." His face grew thoughtful. "But I'm still growing weary of my daily routine. When are you going to visit me again?"

Holly laughed. "Are you trying to say that I destroy your daily routine?"

"No, I was implying that you make life a lot more interesting than it usually is."

Holly grinned, but then she frowned. "I think I might be able to come next Saturday, if I'm lucky. You wouldn't believe how much paper work I have. Not to mention I promised to help Mulch and Doodah with a case."

Today was Friday. Next Saturday? Artemis frowned. He didn't like waiting. "Anything I can help with?" he asked, referring to the case.

"Let me take a crack at it first. If I need any help, I'll call you."

"Or you could just visit," suggested Artemis innocently.

Holly rolled her eyes. "Why don't you just ask Minerva?"

"Because Minerva was just here on Tuesday," Artemis replied.

Of course, Aphrodite had stopped listening to their conversation after Holly had said she might be able to visit on Saturday. If she had it her way, Artemis would not have to wait that long.

"Cupid," she addressed the little elf. "Take those silver arrows over there. You know what to do."

A/N Okay people, what do you think? I've already written the second chapter, I just need to type it up and I'm working on the third. Please review, I haven't written in a while. Then again, I haven't had a plot that's bugged me like this since Of Roses and Kisses. I think I like this better. It's going to be a lot more IC. I want to thank my wonderful beta, Nikki. You rock!

(1)What did you expect? Brown hair, brown eyes, and pimples? Not that I don't think brown hair and brown eyes isn't beautiful. I myself have brown eyes and hair. What I'm trying to say is "Don't hold the violet eyes against me."