Red, Green, and Black

by ErrorPleaseReload

Three men, trapped in a galaxy gripped by turmoil, fight to return to the home they knew. With magic, literally, at their fingertips and a skill that most lacked, they take the galaxy by storm and no one can stand in their way.

1. Chapter 1 - The Egyptian Circus

A/N:

By popular demand, the number-naming-thing has been removed. However, even though I read through several times, there may be cases of a character's name in place of a number, like Sirius for Two.

That was due to me, in my laziness, just hitting control+f and replacing any two with a capital T with Sirius, Three for Bill, and One for Harry.

If you spot any more mistakes, please PM or review!

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Red, Green, and Black

Chapter 1

The Egyptian Circus

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Some Unknown Planet…

Near the outer reaches of explored space sat a small planet, one that, by all appearances, was nothing more than some small gas planet.

This planet, however, housed secrets as old as the Republic itself, secrets believed long forgotten and unattainable. As luck would have it, a certain trio of morons happened to have the means to do the impossible and find the forgotten.

"Suit check?" Harry said as he walked across the rocky surface of the planet, hidden beneath the blanket of gasses. He had an arm raised in a vain attempt to protect the mask of his pressure suit from the raging winds of the planet.

"Not dead, so I think I'm fine!" Another called, a few paces behind with his arm raised as well.

"Watch it, he might actually follow through on his threat to use a pin and pierce your suit!" The third laughed, struggling to keep up with the second. The second laughed until the first drew a small sewing needle.

"I think he has a point," Joked the first, a man by the name of Harry Potter.

"Are you three ever serious?" Demanded a fourth, standing at the back of their little convoy with several other figures.

"Oh, I'm always-" The second started before he was shoved by the third.

"I swear to Merlin, if you finish that sentence I will castrate you!"

"Everybody's a critic," Second tutted, shaking his head before pressing on and catching up with Harry. These two hooligans were Sirius Black and Bill Weasley respectivly. The walked for a few minutes silently, everyone more focused on protecting their pressure suits and oxygen tanks from the perpetually raging storm around them.

Eventually, Harry stopped, leaning forwards to peer into the distance.

"I got a cave like… Two meters ahead!"

"That's what our visibility is limited to? Oh, this is going to be easy!" Bill groaned, trudging forwards to take the place on Harry's left, as Sirius had taken the right.

"Beats the deserts of Africa," Harry pointed out as they started towards the cave with the rest of their company close behind.

"At least in Africa I was able to take the mask off and drink something!" They came to the mouth of the cave and looking into its pitch black depths. All three could feel… Something in its depths, it was equal parts unsettling yet strangely… Attractive.

"This it?" Sirius asked, kneeling down and peering inside.

"Seems like, can you still read us up there?" Harry asked to no one in particular. A voice responded, sounding equal parts bored and tired. The voice came over all three of their comms.

"Regrettably, yes," A feminine voice responded.

"Good, comms will get a little dicey. We'll leave some guards topside on channel three, send them if things go south,"

"Do you expect them to?" The Fourth pressure-suit wearing member of their party asked, sound exasperated.

"Knowing our luck, yes," Bill answered, sounding rather exasperated himself.

"Oh joy," The Fourth groaned before trudging into the cave herself. The rest of their company entered, coming fully into view. Unlike the other four, they did not wear pressure suits, mostly because they didn't need to.

All five were robots, or 'droids', as they were known. Each one stood around Harry's height, not much of an accomplishment in the eyes of Sirius and Bill as they both had a solid head over him. All were dark grey with lithe forms, blasters and swords strapped over their backs.

"Sirius of you stay here and communicate with her, the rest on me," Harry ordered the droids before turning down the deep cave.

"Roger, roger," The droids droned in the monotone voices. Two of them walked a few paces out of the cave before standing stock-still at its mouth. The rest awaited further instructions.

"On me, let's hope, for once, the Sith didn't pile in a metric fuck-ton of traps," Harry said, pulling free the blaster he had slung over his shoulder and prowling into the darkness.

"Traps?!" The Fourth responded, her voice betraying her fear.

"Oh, Sith love them. Remember that time on Mustafar?" Sirius said to Harry before shuddering, "I still have nightmares." All three laughed as the Fourth hugged herself and staring at the walls in obvious panic… Well, obvious if she wasn't wearing a pressure suit, Harry figured at the very least.

In spite of her fear, the party pressed on with the droid taking the rear, blasters held at the ready in preparation for any ambushes or traps set by the last owners of this cavern.

Sirius, who was studying the jagged walls, had to be stopped by Harry's arm shooting across his chest.

"What-" Harry indicated down, and to Sirius's surprise, a deep, black chasm had opened up on the floor.

"Illusions? The hell are we dealing with?" Harry mused, signaling from Bill to join them. The trio kneeled and studying the chasm.

"How deep you feel?" Harry asked absently, resting his blaster on his leg. Bill cocked his head, scratching at his neck beneath the suit.

"No idea, I'll need light. Magic out of the question, then?"

"We crossed some sort of Illusion Ward, I'd say someone was here before us. Knapsack!" Harry called back to the group. One of the droids, wearing a battered out backpack held together by strips of duct tape and holding a number of patches with several nation's flags, pushed forwards and jogged to Harry's side. Without a word, it turned its back and allowed him early access to the pack. He opened it and drew out a chemical flare.

"Stand clear," He said, and without a word the droid and other two backed off. After another second, he twisted the cap and drew it away, igniting the flare. Its red hue filled the black cavern, and illuminating a few meters into the chasm. He let go, counting down the moment it left his hand.

He only got to two before it met the bottom, yet the light did not reach him. The other two returned, looking down as well.

"What's you count?" Bill asked, kneeling again.

"Two seconds," Harry said, signalling over the droid again.

"Only two?" Sirius sounded surprised, "And we can't see it?"

"This is some dark shit, mate," Bill warned, watching as Sirius pulled out a rope, massive nail, and hammer. He handed the nail and hammer to the droid.

"Give it a about a foot clear to tie the rope around," Harry ordered.

"Roger, roger," The droid deadpanned, setting to work as he approached the remainder of their jolly company. The formally silent cavern was now filled with the resounding sound of the hammer meeting the nail.

"We got some engulfing darkness down there. When we head down, the doctor stays in the middle and the rest of us form a circle. Keep close and check your neighbors are still there every few seconds, understood?"

"Roger, roger," The droid nodded their affirmation, through the scientist sounded indignant.

"I can take care of myself!"

"No, you can't," Maybe it was the certainty in Harry's voice, but she remained silent. Harry moved back to the rest, catching the end of the Droid's work. It tied the rope around the nail and cast the other end into the chasm. Harry kneeled down and peered in with narrowed eyes.

"... I'll go first, you two follow. After that, two droids, the doctor, and the rest," No one verbally responded as Harry grabbed a zipline clip. One side was attached to one of the belt loops on his pressure suit and the other to the rope. 'Secured', he began shimmying down.

It was, naturally, pitch black in the chasm, as he had figured at the top. However, in the darkness, an old feeling flooded him. Perhaps it was how jaded he had become over danger over the years, or perhaps he was a glutton for punishment, but he rarely felt true fear.

Damn Sith, the Egyptians had nothing on them…

Harry landed and detached from the rope, stepped forwards and kneeling. He aimed his blaster into the darkness, the lamp on the end doing dick to illuminate the all devouring darkness.

"All clear!" He called up, which was only partially true, if one counted 'about three feet around me' as 'all clear'. No voices came from the top, causing his already panicked heart to pick up the pace. For a few moments, nothing, until, finally, the rope gave a shake. Someone was coming down.

A few minutes later and Sirius made his appearance, landing and doing the same as Harry, his own blaster aimed into the darkness.

"Damn, visibility is shit down here," The man grumbled as he shuffled. The Third joined them shortly after, followed in short order by two of the droids, who opted to just slide down as they needn't worry about puncturing their pressure suits.

It was another ten minutes before the doctor's shaky breathing joined them.

"Am I nearly down?!" She demanded, clearly too terrified to look down for herself.

"If I could see, I would tell you," Bill said sarcastically, not turning back to look at her and instead sharing a glance with the others. Once again, his expression was hidden from them, but if Harry was a betting man he would assume the other man's emotion would be exasperation.

The sound of her boots hitting the ground were followed quickly by a sigh of relief.

"Doctor Katamari, please, stand aside," One of the droids intoned, the woman giving a slight cry of shock.

"Oh… oh, of course," They were soon joined by the remainder of their company.

"You droids have any visibility?" Sirius asked their guards.

"One meter, sir," One droid responded.

"Damn… Are we in a hallway or room?" The droid didn't respond for a moment, instead walking around.

"... Hallway, sir,"

"Change of plans, then," Harry muttered, rising, "Take up the whole hall, I want us to extend from one wall to the other, how high is the ceiling?"

"Nine feet from floor to ceiling," A droid responded in the darkness as the rest too position on the sides of the group.

"Are the walls ragged like topside, or are they somehow altered?"

"... Altered, sir. Professionally carved with runes I do not recognise," One droid at the sides responded, eliciting a groan from Bill.

"I'm getting a distinct feeling of Deja-Vu," He joked with a good natured growl. Harry looked over at the other man in confusion before remembering that they couldn't really see each other.

"Deja-Vu?"

"Sudan?" Bill reminded his coworker and friend with a chuckle.

"Merlin, that was four years ago, mate. Though, if things go down the same as last time, then I don't think I'll complain," All three of them laughed before Harry signalled the group forwards. And so they marched, all with weapons raised into the darkness.

The only sound was the mechanical movements of the droids, their collective footsteps, and the breathing of the four organics in the group.

A feeling began to impose itself in Harry's head, a certain emotion of dread. He shook his head in an attempt to clear it and focus again. That helped for but a moment before the feeling came back, slowly growing in strength despite his best efforts. At the same time, a pressure began to build in front of him, trying to push him back.

The other three seemed to feel the same, as Bill's breathing began to grow labored and Sirius was muttering to himself. The doctor let out whimper, her hands grabbing Harry's shoulders as she pressed close to him, very obviously terrified.

They didn't get another meter before the pressure increased exponentially. Harry felt as if he were trying to push through a solid wall, grunting with effort as terror replaced dread.

"This is wrong!" Sirius said, his voice breaking.

"Keep moving!" Harry snapped, fear powering his anger. They kept going, the droids now slowing to a march. The fear was joined by another feeling, paranoia. Harry could feel something watching them from the darkness, an unreasonable thought, as the droids said they were in a hallway.

Unless the droids were involved?

No, no… He shook his head, trying to focus.

"What was that?!" Bill snapped, whipping his gun around and nearly clocking Harry in the face. Harry caught the man's gun and shoved it forwards.

"Watch it!" He snapped, earning an immediate reaction.

"Piss off, there's something here!" The other man growled, bringing himself to his full height and glowering at the younger man from behind his mask.

"There isn't dick out there, you twat! It's a bloody hallway and nothing got past us!"

"Says you! But every job, every damned job for the last four years have been nothing short of disaster, each of them chosen by you!"

"What, this is my fault, then?!" Harry snarled, getting into the face of the man he thought he could trust, "We made a unanimous decision on every job, so don't you go blaming me for-" Bill's fist connect with the side of his head, throwing Harry sideways into the ground and toppling over the new screaming doctor.

Before Bill could start in on Harry, Sirius got between them.

"W-Will you two get a b-bloody hold of yourselves a-and- Bugger! K-Knapsack!" The mentioned droid ran over and giving Sirius access to the pack. From inside, he pulled free another rope, this one with several rungs on it no bigger than Harry's hand.

"P-Put your h-hand in the wrung and tighten it. Droid, hold this end and pull us along no matter w-what. The r-rest of you, take a s-side and t-try to stop us f-from killing o-one- FUCK!"

"Roger, roger," One of the droid intoned, and they all moved as one. Sirius placed himself tactically between Bill, who was in the lead, and Harry. The Doctor took the back, much to her sobbing distress.

"M-Move!" Sirius snapped, his own fear making way to anger. The droid complied, walking them back into the overwhelming pressure. Harry marched forwards, determined not to show weakness in front of that traitorous Bill even as his head throbbed.

The Doctor was the first to begin begging.

"Please, for the love of gods, turn back!" She cried, but her pleading was ignored but the droids and three men, who all had murderous thoughts sprouting in the minds. It came to a head when Sirius suddenly, and without warning, tried to shoot Bill in the back. The droids confiscated their weapons after that, leaving the men to shout at each other.

The anger, however, made way to true terror.

"For the love of Merlin, stop! I order you to bloody stop!" Bill cried to the lead droid, but to no response.

"I don't want to die, I'm too pretty!" Sirius joined.

"We're all doomed!" Harry added to the party of dispair.

It grew and grew, the pressure, the anger, the fear, it felt as if it were about to crush them when…

It was gone.

The four crossed a threshold of sorts, and suddenly it was all gone. Harry's legs wobbled and he collapsed from the stress on his knees. Panting, he fell to his hands and knees before rolling to his back with an arm over his mask.

"It's… Gone." He said to the droid at the head to stop it from dragging them along. The doctor's sobbing grew quieter, though her 'no more, no more' could be heard over Sirius and Bill's words.

"Merlin, I'm going to be sick!" Sirius gagged, having freed himself from the rope and using the wall as a support.

"Fuck, fuck, FUCK!" Was all Bill could managed, banging his fists on the ground.

Harry was the first to start, his laughter growing from an unsettled chuckle to all-out laughter. Sirius followed next, sounding breathless at first before gripping his sides. Bill followed soon after, and the Doctor was, naturally, last, though her laughter was tear filled. The relief that flooded them was overwhelming.

"Terror-Aggression-Pressure-Paranoia," Harry listed breathlessly on one hand before taking in the illuminated hallway, "-Darkness ward?"

"Told you, worse than the Egyptians!" Bill added, now lying down as well, "Sorry about the whole punching you in the face thing…"

"Don't mention it, I was about to do the same," Harry waved away his apology while getting up, moving to help the Doctor, "Come on, we have to keep moving."

It took a bit of prodding, but everyone got back to their feet.

"I assume you lot didn't feel a thing?" Harry asked a droid as he took his blaster back, slinging it over his shoulder.

"Negative, sir,"

"Must-a been all psychological, then," Sirius noted as he slung his rifle as well, looking down the now illuminated hallway. At the end sat an inconspicuous doorway, the attached door hanging open.

The hallway, as the droid had described it, was rather well carved, with symbols and what Harry assumed to be words. Not a lick of it made any sense, but that was kind of expected in his line of work.

"Alright, move out, same formation," Harry ordered, indicating down the hall. They all set off once more, coming to the open door. Inside was a massive room, maybe two stories tall with another door at the end. It was, for all intent and purposes, empty.

And an empty room of this size meant traps.

"Doth our luck ever cease?" Bill deadpanned, coming to the same conclusion.

"What do you figure?" Harry asked, kneeling and peering in.

"Doors shut, something comes out to kill us," Harry looked at his comrade, raising his eyebrow. While the other man could not see the movement, the message was made clear, "I told you, mate, Sudan. This whole bloody thing reeks of it."

Harry rolled his eyes before waving over the droid with the backpack.

"Knapsack!" The droid kneeled and revealed the pack to Harry. Harry opened it and, from within its shadowy depths, pulled free a rocket launcher. A rocket launcher, mind, that was several times too big for the pack. Following was several rocket pods for it.

"Are you sure about using the launcher," Bill asked with barely disguised humor, earning a befuddled glance from Harry, "They're expensive."

"What? No they aren't-" Realization hit Harry and he scowled, "You aren't funny, and you should feel bad." Bill laughed as Harry loaded a pod and stood up, getting ready to move in.

"Okay, here's the plan. When we enter, fan out. Doctor, stay near the door and-"

"Wait," Bill suddenly cut him off, as if he just came to realize something.

"What now?" Harry demanded.

"Remember; 'He with the launcher always dies first'?" Harry just stared at him for a second.

"Touche." He handed the launcher off to the droid with the pack, "Keep an eye out and don't be too conservative with the pods. They are replaceable, us four are not."

"Roger, roger." The droid said in the dull monotone. Harry gave a brisk nod, turning back to the door.

"Okay, move!" The three men led the way, blasters raised as they spilled in, looking around for any sign of traps. Harry swept the ceiling directly above the door they had entered, but it was much like its mirror on the other side of the room; empty.

The droids and doctor followed, all warily watching every crevice of the room. They stopped in the middle room, not even bothering to head towards the exit, betrayed rule 35 of the Curse-Breaker's manual, it did.

35. If the room you enter lacks any clear traps, then the door itself must be a trap.

That book, as dry and witty as it was, had saved Harry's life more times than he could count, and Bill's even more than that.

Naturally, Sirius, the least experienced in their group, had to go and jinx it.

"Maybe it really is empty?" He asked hopefully, and it was then that the trap was sprung. The two doors slammed shut, followed by four false panels in the walls to swing open. These panels revealed hidden rooms, and more importantly, four identical droids.

These droids easily towered over Harry and company, standing on four spindly legs. These legs led up to an equally scrawny body, which wouldn't have looked all that intimidating had it not been for the four laser cannons each of them had on their arms.

"Shit." Was all Harry said before blasters opened fire. Crimson flew in every direction as both parties opened fire on one-another. Harry landed two shots before being forced to drop into a dive to avoid being sheared in half by on of the sentries. One droid, who had been unlucky to be standing in the wrong place at the wrong time, was shredded by the deadly fire of the larger droids. The less of their guard was far quicker, however, diving into acrobatics that would have been impossible for humans. Not that it helped the four organics among them, only three of which were even able to fight.

"Launcher!" Harry yelled at the droid in question, diving away from another flurry of blaster bolts. The droid complied, kneeling and firing off a round at one of the larger contraptions. In a fiery explosion, all that was left was a pile of spare parts.

"Cover, move! I'll get the doctor!" Harry shouted at his comrades before darting across the stone floor towards the prone woman. She was lying with her face to the ground, hands over her head in a vain attempt to protect her from falling debris shook free by the rain of blaster fire. Harry grabbed her arm and tried pulling her to her feet.

"On your feet, doctor!" He snapped as she struggling, trying to remain down.

"I was assured you three were the best! Count Dooku told me there was nowhere safer than around you three!" The woman cried when she was finally on her feet and being run towards the downed droid.

"He lied!" Harry quipped, but before he moved he spoke again, "About the second one," and then he was tackling her to the ground behind the cover. The duo scrambled up and leaned against the droid, Sirius and Bill taking potshots at the large droids to no effect. Harry joined, just in time to catch the droid with the launcher making ready to fire. It was at that moment when one of the larger droids opened noticed and shredded the smaller droid in moments. By some luck the launcher and backpack were spared, unfortunately the droid's finger pulled the trigger as it fell. The rocket went into the ceiling, shaking the entire compound and knocking a few large pieces of rubble free. Two of the larger pieces earned some casualties, one of their droids and one of the larger ones.

"We need that launcher!" Bill called when the trio went back behind their cover.

"You want to run out and get it?!" Sirius demanded as Harry peeked back out in time to catch another of their guards being downed. Only two remained. The man pursed his lips, weighing his chances before drawing from his belt a short, simple stick.

"Harry?! What in the blazes are you doing-" Bill started, but he was cut off by a few small explosions along the body of their dilapidated cover. Harry aimed his stick, a wand, at the backpack and launcher.

"Accio!" He said, flicking it upwards as he did so. Both items closed the distance quickly, rolling along the floor. The reaction was immediate, the entire room dimmed for a second and a low hum emanated from the halls.

Harry didn't care, however, he caught the launcher and immediately took aim on the nearer of the two droids. With a pull of the trigger, a rocket was sent spiralling at it, engulfing the body in flame.

As it fell, its partner dispatched the last of their guards. Now it was four versus one, three if you discounted the doctor, and one if you added the fact that Sirius and Bill's small arms did dick to the larger droid. Harry swore as it rushed them, clearing half the room in a blink. He had barely freed a tube when it soared over its down companion and checked him to the ground. The launcher and tube went flying in opposite directions, Harry now finding himself trapped beneath its massive form.

The droid reared back, aiming to spear his chest with its metallic front legs when-

"BOMBARDA!" An explosion ripped into its exposed 'belly', blasting pieces out the other end. The force of the explosion, and the momentum of rearing back, sent it careening over and into the ground in a shower of pieces. Harry looked over to see Sirius aiming his wand where the droid had been a moment before. He opened his mouth to say… Well, something, whether it was telling to older man off or thanking him Harry didn't even know. That was when the room reacted. The lights shut out and it began shaking violently.

"Move!" Harry snapped, gathering the bag and sprinting for the new open door. The other didn't waste a second, sprinting after him as fast as their legs could carry them.

KA-BOOM! The resulting explosion sent the doctor, the last of their party, flying a solid fifteen feet and bouncing another four. Harry slid to a stop, his arms over his head in a vain attempt to protect his suit.

"Shit!" Harry yelled, barely even able to hear himself. Sirius said something, not that he could understood. They all, slowly, got up, hands on their throbbing ears.

"Sound off," Harry yelled once he could better hear, "Is anyone dead?"

"I think so!" Bill called, head still in his hands.

"Not yet!" Sirius joined, standing.

"Merp." Was all the doctor managed as she struggled to move. Harry, finally, got to his feet and, using one of the walls as a support, made his way to his fallen rifle.

It was, too his annoyance, totaled, and there was no way in hell he was going to repeat Sirius's little mistake in the previous room.

The bag, if it weren't already in bad enough condition, was collected by the pressure-suited man. He deposited his blaster inside before putting it over his back. Sirius and Bill were assisting the Doctor, who still had trouble finding her footing. Harry looked back at the way they had come, the hallway was completely caved in.

"No going out that way…" He murmured before turning to the others. Sirius and Bill had the Doctor's arms slung over their shoulders.

"Come on, I don't want to be here any longer than completely necessary," Harry said, signalling for them to follow him. The groaned, now forced to drag the deadweight of the woman and their own blasters. Lucky bastards, at least they had weapons.

The hallway was no longer than the hallway from hell, which was excessively empty and, dare he jinx it, boring. Eventually, they reached the last door, this one closed. A few tests of the handle proved it unlocked.

"Well, that was-"

"I swear to Merlin, don't you say it!" Bill snapped at Sirius while shuffling the weight of the Doctor. Harry didn't respond, merely pulling the door open. Inside was a massive room, several times that of their previous battleground. Instead of the drab tan that populated the rest of the system, this room was a dark grey with glowing blue lines moving, seemingly randomly, along the walls. The center of the room, however, was populated by a massive metal hill of sorts, topped by an altar.

Harry led the charge up, his wand our incase he absolutely had to start fighting. Nothing jumped out, nor did anything make a move to kill him or the rest of their party. Harry arrived at the top of the stairs to find a small, red stone sitting on the altar.

Sirius and Bill reached the top as Harry moved to study the stone. It looked normal, you know, for a glowing, perfectly spherical orb. When Harry moved a hand to grab it, though, Bill's harsh whisper came from behind.

"Sudan!" He hissed, giving Harry pause.

"Right…" Harry pulled his hand back and then took the backpack off. Kneeling, he searched around inside and pulled out two items: tongs and a large, metal suitcase. He clicked a switch on the suitcase's side for a second before opening it. Inside now sat an indentation perfect for the strange orb. Using the tongs, Harry transported the orb into the indentation before slamming it shut and locking it.

Harry rose, now carrying the suitcase at his side while checking his watch.

"Okay, it's been two hours now. Aubrie will be getting worried that we're dead and can't pay her," Harry said, watching Bill pick the Doctor back up. Sirius, however, was looking down the metal hill opposite the way they came.

"Was that door always there?" He asked, indicating to a door that, yes, had not been there mere moments before. Harry scrunched up his face, drawing his wand again.

"No, it wasn't. I don't exactly want to trust magical doors that appeared from nowhere," Harry stated, eyeing it with suspicion.

"What other option do we have?" Asked Bill, shifting to better carry the Doctor in his arms, "The other entrance is blocked, remember-"

"Stop right there!" A voice snapped over Bill's words, coming from somewhere behind them. The trio spun, revealing two figures in red pressure suits. Both were distinctly female, why someone made a skintight pressure suit was beyond Harry. One, the shorter of the two, had two strange tentacle-like protrusions coming from the back of her head and through specially made holes on the back of the pressure suits head. She had, evidently, been the one to yell. Less because it was obvious, and more because that was what she usually did when the two groups ran into one-another.

"Oh great, these two," Bill growled, shifting the Doctor's weight once again. Harry snorted before calling down to them.

"I'm going to assume it's you, Fay, Secura?" Harry called, wand still in his right hand.

"Captain Potter, this doesn't have to be difficult, just surrender yourselves and we can ensure you a fair trial," Fay, ever the diplomat, tried to reason with him. Alas, Harry had heard this song and dance before.

"Yeah, okay. Listen, girls, we're on a tight schedule, so can we skip to the part where we get away and you walk back to the Jedi Temple with your heads hanging and shame and your tails between your legs?" Harry said lazily.

"I would certainly like to have something else between their legs-" A hard slap silenced Sirius, "Oi, you're supposed to be unconscious!"

"Unconscious, not dead," The Doctor muttered drowsily before seemingly blacking out again.

"Thank you for your contribution, doctor," Harry deadpanned before turning back to the Jedi, "As I was saying. We all know how this song and dance goes."

"Captain Potter, this planet is currently being blockaded by a fleet of Republic ships. Even if you escape us, they will more likely than not capture you," Fay tried again, but to no avail. She was, after all, arguing with the three most stubborn Wizards in the galaxy.

"Hey, speaking of escape, how the hell did you get through the collapsed room?" Sirius demanded.

"Collapsed room? All we found was a room with four ancient Sith droids…" Secura groaned, rubbing her side as if something had hit her there.

"I told you, worse than the Egyptians," Bill hissed at his comrade, earning a slap on the back of the head from Harry. Harry drew his wand from his belt, followed by Sirius. The Jedi grabbed the hilts on their hips and ignited bright blue blades, illuminating their immediate area with a blue hue.

Neither party moved, save Bill who had slowly edged down the other way of the structure, making his way for the other exit.

"Incarcerous!" Led Sirius with the rope summoning charm. As thick ropes sprung from the tip of his wand, the same low humming from the last room filled their ears. Secura cleaved through the ropes as Fay dodged forwards.

"Stupefy!" Harry followed, aiming for Fay. The humming grew a few decibels as the red spell was blocked by her lightsaber. The two Jedi began to push up the stairs under Sirius and Harry's fire.

"Reducto, Arresto Momentum, Incarcerous!"

"Pulsus, Petrificus Totalus, Stupefy!" They through everything and the kitchen sink at the two Jedi, but to no avail. These two were battle hardened and trained to weave their way through oncoming fire.

Secura was quick on her feet and with her blade, snapping one way and another. Any spell her balde failed to miss was avoided.

Fay, on the other hand, was far more graceful. With smooth twists and ducks their spells hit the ground behind them with little effect.

Harry scowled, these two had been a thorn in their collective sides for coming on to three years now.

Aayla Secura and Fay, whether or not that was her full name was up for debate, had chased Harry and company from one edge of the galaxy to the other. It had started with just Fay, a buxom blond with a stoic personality that, despite Sirius's best efforts, never became riled up. She had, perhaps by chance or their beloved 'force', came across the trio busting into an old Jedi Temple on a job to collect some holocron. She had, in vain, attempted to apprehend and reason with them.

Harry thing led to another, and they were forced to tie her up until they finished with their job. At this point, they didn't know what the force was or how it could be used.

Suffice it to say, they were sent running with their tails between their legs, and Sirius's right arm shattered. Despite her stoic and peaceful personallity, she royally kicked their asses.

It wasn't long until they met, again, on another planet at another Temple. Sirius, apparently enjoying himself a woman who could kick his ass, shamelessly flirted with her as a distraction whilst Harry and Bill collected what they were after. She had, according to Sirius, showed only mild disinterest at his flirtations, more interested in demanding why he was here. She didn't even know what was going on when Sirius blew her a kiss and apprated away. It amused Bill and Harry to no end to see shock displayed on her usually stoic face.

This carried on for about a year, Fay dedicating a large portion of her time to hunting the trio down. They dueled several times, each time the trio managing to outsmart, outmanuever, or outbullshit her.

It was then that the Jedi sent another to assist the Jedi Master, Jedi Knight Aayla Secura. Aayla Secura was of a alien species known as 'Twilek', a rather fit race of humanoid beings. Their defining features were their 'lekku', long, tentacle like protrusions from the back of their head.

Oh, that and she was fucking blue.

As Sirius had so eloquently put it: "Blue or not, Harry, she has massive…" And he used his hands to demonstrate about his breast area.

Secura, unlike Fay, was brash and headstrong, rushing after them like a bull instead of prowling after them like Fay had been trying to do. More than once, her impatience gave them ample enough time to escape. Fay had been more or less forced to take Aayla's reigns after the fifteenth time she was duped by the trio.

The duo proved far more effective, and fairly capable at keeping Harry and company on their toes. Problem was, everyone and everything was working against them. Crime families protected those they lauded as 'the best thieves of the age' and business were not quick to sell out their 'financial boost investments'. Even the Republic was hesitant to go after them, especially since several commonly hired the trio. That, and they had officially committed nothing more than defacing 'religious' centers and tomb robbing. That was hardly worth the effort of sending the Grand Army of the Republic after them.

Harry assumed it was Fay's bluff that several Venators waited high above. Venators weren't cheap, after all, and they hardly warranted such a group to come after them.

"Caecus!" Harry shouted, thrusting his wand upwards. A bright flash filled the room, bathing everything and everyone in brief light. Harry and Sirius's suits held sun-protectors on their pressure suits that automatically activated at any extreme light. The Jedi, however, seemed to not have that feature.

Both stumbled back at the light, arms raised. Harry and Sirius stopped their barrage, and not a moment too soon. The room had begun to violently shake, small pieces of rubble falling from the ceiling and bouncing along the ground. The duo didn't waste a moment, taking off in the opposite direction and for the exit.

The Jedi weren't stalled for more than a second, taking off after them. Harry and Sirius made it through the exit and into another long, tan hallway. They hadn't gone more than five meters when the Jedi appeared at the entrance, sprinting more than twice as fast as Harry and Bill.

"Damn!" Harry stopped, wrenching open the backpack.

"What are you doing?!"

"Just go!" Sirius, albeit hesitantly, did as he was told and continued down the tunnel. Harry ripped free what, by all appearances, was a small toy artillery piece. He threw it a few feet in front of him, cancelling the shrinking charm on it. Instantly, a life size British 2-pounder appeared. It was slightly rusted, granted, but still operational.

Harry kneeled as he pulled a shell out, cramming it into the gun. He didn't even bother aimed, just ripping back on the firing handle. The gun, which evidently already had a silencing charm on it, kicked with an unheard explosion. Instead of a round flying out of the barrel of gun, however, a net exploded out. It seemed to be made of diamond and gold, spinning wildly as it flew at the Jedi. Both brought their sabers in an attempt to deflect it, but to their clear surprise, the blades bounced off.

Harry had spent a large amount of time as a Curse Breaker working with goblins, which allowed him a number of their toys. This one was entitled 'the Bane of Amargoth', some goblin demon that typically took the form of a sphinx. It was a net that came in the form of a small, golden ball. Typically, they were fit on the end of goblin crossbows and bows, but a brilliant man back in the war discovered a way to fit the net on the end of an artillery shell. Typically, it was useless, but in did fire fast and further than the goblin weapons.

Both Jedi collapsed as the net pinned them, it was designed to hold at bay massive magical creatures, after all. Not that Harry much noticed, as he had shrunk the gun back down and took off in the opposite direction.

Harry escaped the tunnel to find Bill and Sirius awaiting his arrival, both panting slightly.

"What took so long?" Bill asked.

"Wanted to leave a parting gift," Harry tapped his ear to activate his comms, "Amari, Boton, we could really use an evac!"

The trio took off running again, hoping to distance themselves from the Jedi.

"What could have possibly happened since the last I spoke to you?!" Amari's voice demanded over the comms.

"Oh, you know, the usual: Jedi," Sirius commented amusedly, but their jokes were cut aside when Bill called out.

"Whatever you did, Harry, it didn't stop them!"

Harry looked back and swore, bot Jedi were hot on their tail, blades still ignited. Of course, this had to be the moment the gas storm lifted and allowed partially optimal vision.

"Hold on, we're enroute," Amari said before the comm cut out. The trio continued running, Sirius and Harry send back charms and jinxes in the vain hope of slowing the Jedi down.

The loud sound of an engine drew their eyes upwards, to a spot light cutting through the dense gas above.

Harry breathed a sigh of relief as the familiar body of their ship appeared, roaring rather loudly. The boarding ramp lowered, a figure stepping down and waving at them. They were clearly female, though the pressure suit hid much of their form. Much like Secura, lekku sprouted out of the back.

Harry opened his backpack and freed from within a trio of old Cleansweep 8s. He tossed one to Sirius and then the other to Bill, taking the last from himself.

"How in Merlin's name am I supposed to carry her and fly?" Bill demanded as Harry mounted his broom. Harry flew over next to him, taking the woman in his arms.

"I'll take her, get airborne!" And with that, Harry flew for their ship, the Radiant.

Amari took the doctor first before guiding Harry into the main holding area. Bill was next, easing his way in as skillfully as Harry, though lacking cargo. The last was Sirius, but just as he reached the ramp his broom was suddenly ripping back from under him. He swore, falling for a terrifying millisecond.

"Shit!" Yelled Harry and Bill as they tried, in vain, to save their comrade. Amari was, thank Merlin, leagues faster. Her hand darted out and grabbed Sirius, grunting with effort as the man slammed into the boarding ramp itself. Harry arrived in time to grab Sirius's other arm before Amari went over with him. Their combined effort dragged the wizard on board, Bill closing the ramp behind him.

The force that was resisting them suddenly vanished, Harry and Amari falling flat on their asses. Sirius flopped to the ground, his face making a rather loud sound as it met the durasteel.

A moment of panting later and those present broke out into laughter.

"Amari, I could kiss you!" Sirius declared, dragging himself to a sitting position. Amari undid her pressure suit's mask and pulled it off, sweating even though she hadn't been in the suit for long. Harry envied her, had he known how much one would sweat in a pressure suit he would have gone nude in the thing.

"I don't think Boton will much like that," She warned good naturedly, getting up and making her way for the exit to the cargo area.

"When you eventually break apart, I'll be there to pick up the pieces!" Sirius added, earning musical laughter from the Twi'lek. From deeper within the ship, a sharp voice snapped at Sirius.

"I can hear you, you know!" Everyone broke into raucous laughter at that, getting up and heading for the cockpit.

Amari and Boton, the trio's only employees in the entire galaxy, and thus far, the only people who hadn't tried to kill them.

The duo had been hired about a year after the trio arrived in the galaxy.

Boton was a Rodian, though he was born on Corellia to a family of soldiers. From a young age, he was pressure to join Corsec by his family, which he happily did. He became a pilot for them and served for, roughly, five years. A battle with pirates had cost him his leg, immediately seeing him lauded as a hero and unceremoniously kicked from Corsec. Too ashamed to face his family, Boton fled the city for a neighbor where he buried his problems in liquor and women.

As luck would have it, Sirius entered the same bar as Boton a few months after the latter had been sacked. They quickly got into a fight, what over neither remembered as they had been completely sloshed, and were promptly arrested by Corsec.

It had taken two days for Harry and Bill to track him down, and when they found the duo, still under custody by Corsec, Sirius proudly introduced their pilot. Apparently, over the following two days after they were arrested, the duo were forced to bond and became fast friends.

Boton joined their crew as a pilot to the ship Bill had bought, time and time again proving his worth.

Amari, on the other hand, was born to minor noble family on Corellia, though she was a Twi'lek. She was a perfect student, but was never much interested in the jobs her family tried to give her. How she had met the group was a deal-gone-wrong, of all things. She was taken as a hostage by the Black Sun representative they were supposed to meet. She was, naturally, saved by a combination of heroics and extreme luck.

She spoke with her saviour, being Bill and Harry a the time, before accidentally learning they needed a secretary for their 'business'. Suddenly finding a possible outlet to allow her a chance to explore different avenues, Amari offered her services.

And was promptly rebuked.

And again.

After the third time, Bill folded and joined her crusade, forcing Harry to play along.

Amari and Boton hit it off maybe three months after they were brought on board, perhaps it was their conflicting personalities, or some other unseen force.

Boton was abrasive, short tempered, and sarcastic.

Amari was soft-spoken, kind, and pragmatic.

A year ago, they married on Corellia. Sirius stood as his best man, while Amari brought in a childhood friend. The marriage was a small affair, as Boton had requested. He was a veteran, afterall, never much liked big crowds.

Their families weren't very accepting of the marriage or their children's chosen jobs. Amari's family cornered and tried to force her to stop 'this waste of time'. Sirius, with all the decorum of a bull in a china shop, slapped the mother's arse, put an arm around the father's shoulders and recounted, with visual detail, the time the three of them butchered a small army of Black Sun thugs. Granted, that was a lie, the three of them avoided conflict like the plague, but it summarily spooked the parents into dropping the subject. It helped that the trio had started to earn a bit of a reputation around the galaxy as 'criminals'.

Boton's family was not so easily intimidated, all of them hardened veterans and soldiers. Boton, unlike Amari, was not so easily pushed around, however. It required him beating the ever-living-shit out of his eldest brother, along with the father and Harry having a dick-measuring contest, but eventually they, grudgingly, accepted the union.

A year later, and they were still happily married.

The ship suddenly shook as something exploded alongside them.

"You guys might want to get up here," Boton called from the cockpit, "We got three Venators in orbit!"

---

Somewhere in Northern Sudan…

A Sum of Years Before the Story...

There was a rather nasty sandstorm in northern Sudan that day, but that was a plus for a company of figures cutting through the desert. Not because they wanted to stand in a sandstorm, all of them would much rather be in Khartoum with some tea and running water. No, they had to be in a sandstorm, preferably lost to find their quarry.

"I can't see a bloody thing!" Harry called from behind Bill, who was pulling his hat down over his balaclava.

"We're getting close, I'm sure of it!" Bill responded, trying to peer out over the ear endless sands.

"You said that three kilometers ago!" Another of their party cried readjusting their assault rifle.

"Will you quit your crying?! We're-" From seemingly nowhere, Bill ran into a previously unseen wall, which took form of a titanic door. Bill stumbled back and looked up stunned. Harry, jogging to catch up, was forced into a backpedal when his comrade nearly toppled him.

"Told you!" Bill declared, sounding proud of himself as he looked up at the entrance to the tomb. The rest of their company, made mostly of humans with a few people half their sizes, stopped in a semi-circle around the entrance of the tomb.

"Well, I'll be damned, English," Drawled a man with a distinct Texan accent. He slung his rifle over his back before walking up to the great double doors. He gave them a push, but to no avail. They didn't even shudder. Harry of the others made to draw their wand, but Harry's hand stopped them.

"No magic! What are you, an amateur?" Harry demanded before waving over the rest of their company. The man he had stopped glowered at Harry as everyone else gathered at the door to give a collective push.

"Push!" Bill barked, and they pushed.

"Push!" And they did, the door actually moving a foot or so. Five more orders of 'push' and the door was ajar enough that they could slip in. The company went in, safe from the unending storm of sand and dust. The moment the last of them passed in the door slammed shut, shrouding them in darkness.

"Lamps," Bill ordered, lighting the one at the end of his rifle. Everyone did the same, giving them some light. Bill, Curse Breaker extraordinaire, pulled off his balaclava and goggles, revealing his sand beaten and tanned complexion. He cracked his neck and slapped the side of his rifle, trying to clear it of sand.

Harry removed his extra clothing as well.. Of course, this wasn't the Harry Potter that anyone from his youth could competently recognise, and in many cases recognise at all.. Gone was his frail and pale complexion, replaced now by a nice tan and a more filled out body. Years of working in the desert as an apprentice Curse Breaker, now a 'professional' Curse Breaker. His most amusing memory was when he ran into Daphne Greengrass and Tracy Davies, two Slytherin girls from his year. Suffice it to say, he had a rather nice night.

He slammed his fist a few times on the side of the Kalashnikov assault rifle in his hands in an attempt to clean it of the sand lodged inside. When he had first become a Curse Breaker, he wondered why they used muggle guns when they were wizards. Bill gave two reasons:

"Magic has a tendency to activate the Egyptian curses… That, and when I fight an army of the undead, I'd prefer the 600 rounds per minute over the five spells per second."

Of course, magic had a tendency to screw with modern weapons and all their mechanical parts, so Curse Breakers were forced to use older weapons. Now, they could kick around with STENs and Thompsons, but the AK-47 was leagues more effective at downing the undead.

The rest of the party stripped their anti-sand garments. Of the company, two represented Egyptian interests: Rashida, a twenty-something woman from Cairo's Department of Ancient History, and Gargluck, a representative from the Gringott's Ancient Runes Commission.

"I was starting to doubt you, Curse Beaker Weasley." Gargluck chuckled, shifting the heavy repeating crossbow on his back, the goblin answer to the fully-automatic rifle. An AK was a bitch to charm, but a goblin-made crossbow was not.

"I, and the Egyptian government, never once doubted your abilities, Missers Weasley and Potter," The, rather arrogant, government official said, her nose as high as her ego. Bill snorted as Harry responded with a sarcastic drawl.

"Don't remember that being your montra two days ago," Harry turned towards the rest of their company as the Egyptian woman sputtered.

"Regardless, we are making good time. If this tomb is as lucrative as you claim, then we all go home very rich men and women!" Gargluck laughed his deep, guttural laugh that earned a sneer from Rashida. Bill and Harry joined in before the former waved over the rest of their company.

Everyone, including a sneering Rashida at being forced to be close to those she deemed to be 'filthy mercenaries', gathered in a circle to listen to Bill.

"Okay, this tomb had not been recorded for nearly 2,000 years old, when it was supposedly built. Expect the whole nine yards with this one, don't be too conservative with your rounds, if it moves, shoot it and shoot it again, no exceptions. I'm in charge, you follow my lead if you want to live. If I die," Bill indicated to Harry with a jerk of his head, "This arse is in charge…"

"Oi."

"... If he dies… Well, fuck, you're on your own. Got it?"

"Yessir!" All of the mercenaries chorused, joined by a grunt of affirmation from Gargluck. Rashida merely sneered, but neither Bill nor Harry much cared what happened to her, she had been a lead weight from Cairo to here.

"Okay, let's move. I've got point with Texas over there and Sanchez, I want two people watching out six. From there, organize as you see fit and for Merlin's sake keep an eye out," The gathered mercenaries chuckled before moving to their ordered positions.

Archie and Smithers took the back, a Frenchman and American, while Bill, a Texan that Harry could not remember the name of, and Sanchez, a mexican woman trained to read hieroglyphs, took the front.

The company began the long trek into the infinite darkness of the Egyptian catacombs, flashlights dancing into each crevice and crack in the walls.

As they moved, Harry came to realize something rather strange: the walls were all perfectly smoother out, not even the slightest etch or scratch covering their ancient surfaces.

"Hold," Bill suddenly said, forcing the company to stop.

"What-" Rashida started rather loudly when a hand clamped over her mouth from one of the mercenaries. Harry nodded his thanks to the man before walking over, silently, next to Bill. He kneeled down and put a hand on the other man's shoulder to signal he was there.

"Does that look Egyptian to you?" Bill whispered bringing what seemed to be a metal shovel into sight via his flashlight. Harry narrowed his eyes, before creeping forwards.

"Cover me," Harry hissed back, making his way to the shovel. Several cones of light went down the hall, naturally not cutting more than a few meters. Harry reached a hand forwards, grasping the neck of the shovel and making to pull it back.

That was when a rotten, boney hand shot from the darkness and grasped his wrist.

"Shit!" Harry, in a rather manly fashion, screamed. He jumped back, landing on his ass as the shovel went flying. He pulled with him the rotting corpse of what was, at one point, a man in a tan uniform. The man groaned, reaching for Harry with another ruined hand. Harry pulled his side arm from his hip and pressing it to the skull of the undead, pulling the trigger. The muffling charm made the gunshot sound like a small pop, but the gore that now splattered the formerly perfect wall proved its authenticity.

"Open fire!" Harry called, hearing the clear sound of more undead just out of sight. He lay on his stomach, arms over his head. Instead of the roar of fully automatic rifles coming to life, a series of muffled pops accompanied the muzzle flash of the rifles. This went on until the front three men ran out of ammunition in their clips, quickly replaced by another three.

Once they ran out, Harry put a hand up to call for a cease fire. The next three lowered the rifles as Harry twisted and shone the light on the end of his rifle down the hall.

It wasn't pretty. Sirius dozen or so undead had been down the hall, not counting the one that had jumped him. Their bodies were shredded and scattered around the hall, a few still groaning due to their missing legs or lower halves.

Bill jogged over and helped Harry to his feet, dusting off his back.

"You alright?"

"Yeah," Harry gasped, trying to slow his beating heart before his had a heart attack. Harry of the mercenaries kneeled next to the undead that Harry had practised craniotomy on.

"Take a look at this," The man said, lifting up a part of the undead's moldy sleeve. Bill kneeled down and studied it as Harry watched from where he stood.

On the sleeve was a Union Jack, albeit a rather damaged one.

"Damn," Was all Bill had to say.

"Yeah," Harry agreed, ignoring the pops of the mercenaries finishing off the remaining ankle biters.

"What?" Rashida demanded a little snootily, pushing past Bill to stare at the patch.

"Means this job just got a lot more dangerous, and we are getting paid…" Bill looked at Harry and held up three fingers. At Harry's nod he turned back to Rashida, "Three times more."

"What?!" Rashida demanded, too stunned to be fully mad. Bill sighed and pointed to the dead, formerly British, body.

"That body, that is what we in the business call a 'Tomb Keeper'. Tomb Keepers were undead created by Egyptian Priests or Pharaohs to defend crypts and keeps like this," Bill explained.

"And that means we have to pay you more because…?" Rashida demanded, gritting her teeth. Bill let out a small chuckle, adjusting his rifle.

"There are no Priests or Pharaohs left in the world… Live ones, at least. Very powerful, magic wise, and a bitch to kill. These poor lads," Bill pointed to the dead body once again, "Are the work of a Priest."

"Or worse, a Pharaoh," Harry shuddered after saying that, "If that's the case, I'll shoot myself just to spare me the pain."

"Did you just say 'Pharaoh'?!" One of the mercenaries walked over, rifle in his hands as he looked at the duo incredulously. When neither Harry nor Bill responded, the man shook his head.

"No, no fuck this. Bill, Harry, I like you guys, but fuck you. I'm not going to head-to-head with a fuck-mothering Pharaoh, we're out," The man signalled to his men and began in the direction of the exit.

"The door shut behind us, Mercer," Bill warned, pushing past Rashida to talk to the American, "You and I both know we're trapped here 'less we find the exit."

Mercer froze, still facing towards the entrance. The man seemed to have a silent debate with himself before turning to to Bill with a sigh.

"I want double." Mercer demanded. Bill smirked, crossing his arms.

"Why do you think I'm getting more from her," He indicated towards Rashida with a dip of his head.

"Now you wait a minute! You're trapped here, too! Either way, you are going to try to leave!" Rashida tried to snap, but a cool glare from Bill silenced her.

"Yeah, but our pay decides if we keep you alive or not." The temperature seemed to drop a few degrees as all eyes fall on Rashida. Her complexion significantly paled as a bead of sweat fell down her forehead. It was time for the beaurocrat to decide if her life was worth the money.

"I-I…" She stuttered, but was promptly cut of Gargluck.

"Gringotts will pay you triple, Curse Breaker," The goblin stated, unslinging his crossbow from his back. Bill offered the goblin a smirk and a nod before turning his attention back to Rashida.

"Well?" He asked dangerously. The woman looked at each of the gathered mercenaries, none of them looking particularly interested or pitying.

"Okay, okay! You'll get your damned pay! Now, can we go before more of these things find us!" The woman screamed, desperation in her voice.

"Nice to know you can cooperate, let's move, people!" The mercenaries, suddenly reinvigorated by the threats on their lives, pushed into the all consuming darkness.

---

Still Somewhere in Northern Sudan…

And Still A Sum of Years Before the Story...

The trek had taken the better part of three hours, through waves of undead and a merlin-damned Priest. Finally, the group came to a door, but they were stopped by Bill.

"Harry, get up here," Bill whispered back to the bespectacled man. Harry crept up next to the redhead, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"What?"

"Look at this," Bill indicated to the sandy floor. Harry drew his wand before hesitating.

"It's safe," Bill reassured him. Harry nodded and quickly cast the 'magesight' charm. The doorway, if it could be called that, had little in terms of defences. Just a simple activation charm layered over a powerful preservation charm, though what it was preserving was beyond him.

"Preservation? What do you figure?" Harry asked, dropping the magesight and peering into the large room before them. Bill cocked his head from one side to the other, a tick of his when he was thinking.

"What do you want to bank on this place being no older than 2,000 B.C.?" Bill asked.

"Our collective asses," Bill snorted, raising an eyebrow at Harry, "In all seriousness, we can mark off dragons."

"A given," Bill agreed, dragons in catacombs were very rare, as they were a bitch to keep from burning the place down.

"So… What, that leaves Sphinxes, Chaemira, or…?"

"Honestly, anything that can't breath fire but still cut through dozens of men in moments."

"So, Fleur?"

"Fire."

"Ah, right that." Both rose and checked their rifles once more. Harry swung the well-worn backpack out in front of him, fiddling around inside. Eventually, he found his quarry, an RPG-7.

"Sure you want to use the '7? Damn expensive, that," Bill joked, earning a slight chuckle from Harry as the wizard pulled out a warhead and set it in. It was an inside joke for Harry and Bill. Due to the former's expansive finances, there was never a problem with supplies. Really, Harry just did the job for the love of it. Bill worked to support his family, the Weasleys not him, Victoire, and Fleur. Fleur was, while not as wealthy as Harry, well off. He was supporting (much to the duo's annoyance) Ginny and Dean, newly weds, among the rest of his family.

Harry passed off the launcher to another of their company. As the man got used to the front-heavy launcher, Harry signalled the rest of the company over.

"Okay, when we get in, fan out. Find cover, stay in groups of two. I want no one alone if this goes pear-shaped," Bill explained, pulling his balaclava and goggles back on. The men, goblin, and woman did the same. Bill nodded to Harry before moving into the room, AK raised. Harry followed close behind, everyone else coming in short order.

The couples split off and went from large stones that had, seemingly, fallen from the ceiling in some long forgotten battle.

The moment the last of their company passed in, obviously being Rashida who had to be, literally, prodded with a crossbow bolt from Gargluck, the doors on either end of the room slammed shut, trapping them in the room.

"Steady!" Bill shouted, sweeping his '47 over where the walls and ceiling met. A deep, earth shattering roar shook the room.

"The fuck was that?!" Harry demanded, gripping his cover in an attempt to steady himself. Bill was saved from having to answer when the wall behind them lifted into the ceiling. Both turned and peered into another dark room, their hearts, quite literally, freezing.

A massive, scaly head came through the darkness. It was short, its snout much shorter than that of a dragon. It hissed, its tongue coming out forked.

This head was followed by another similar one, then a third. Seven more joined them before a body followed, all the heads attached to it.

A Hydra, a fuck-mothering Hydra.

"Oh." Bill squeaked as everyone just stared at the monster. All ten heads sucked in a breath before letting out an earth shattering roar that nearly shattered everyone's ear drums.

"FUCK, A HYDRA!" Bill repeated, vaulting over his and Harry's cover. Harry wasn't far behind, both of them dropping into a dead sprint to the other side of the room. Not a split second later, every single gun, and in one case crossbow, opened fire. The dark room was illuminated in a blaze of AK-47s, save the one moron that actually brought a M1927.

Hydra, there was a reason these bastards were nearly hunted into extinction. They, reportedly, stood at three stories tall. Naturally, this bugger was at four. They couldn't breath fire, not that they needed to with several heads. In spite of the many control centers, they could easily move with their massive, quadrupedal bodies.

The Hydra clawed in half two of the mercenaries, the mens' screams being drawn out by the monster's roar. The man Harry had given the launcher kneeled and took aim at the body of the beast, smart thinking for a man panicking.

Sadly for him, and everyone else, one of the ten heads darted forwards and snapped the man up in its jaws. He screamed, the launched falling to one side as it lifted him up. His finger snatched the trigger, firing the rocket into a wall.

Harry and Bill, in the meantime, vaulted over another stone and landed beside Gargluck and Rashida. The latter was hyperventilating and has seemingly pissed herself, but Gargluck was laughing his arse off.

"This day gets better and better, Curse Breakers! First a tomb, now a Hydra!" Gargluck let out another burst from his crossbow before sitting down and reloading it, "I wonder where I shall mount one of its heads?"

Bill and Harry looked at each other before peering over their cover. The mercenaries were being shredded, quite literally.

"We need that launcher!" Harry stated as they dropped back behind cover.

"Want to risk magic?" Bill asked, making to draw his wand. His hand, however, was stopped by Harry, who was shaking his head.

"Not a chance… Okay, I have an idea!" Harry stood and searched among the remaining mercenaries, hoping who he was look for was still alive. To his relief, the man was. Standing two pieces of cover over was a mountain of a man that would give Hagrid a run for his money. The man, while overweight, was clearly built like a tank with the firepower to support that claim. Gripped in his hands was the, while outdated, stalwart Vickers Machine Gun.

"Dudley, get your sorry ass over here!" Harry called, waving at their designated machine-gunner. The large man turned his head slightly, his eyes hidden by his goggles. Dudley had, apparently, heard him and began lumbering over, gun held aloft in his hands.

Ten years ago, Harry never would have expected he could ever bury the hatchet with his long-time bully. However, one July day, Harry found himself in a pub tat just so happened t be where Dudley made his home.

Dudley had really cleaned up since the last they met. He had cut back on his weight and had earned a wicked scar down his face from the military, which was where he went in spite of his father. Dudley and Harry got to talking, after so masculine posturing from the two of them, and Harry soon learned that ol' Dudders had a falling out with his parents. Apparently, his school had a Psychology class, and they went over what abuse was, namely child abuse.

Suffice it to say, Dudley was disgusted with himself as well as his parents. Naturally, Petunia and Vernon tried to defend themselves, which led to Dudley breaking his own father's nose and storming from his home. From there, Dudley bounced around with friends before joining up with the military.

He had been stationed in Iraq when an I.E.D. nearly blew his leg off. He was booted from the military 'honourably' and spent most of his time living off government pensions and liquor. When Harry talked about the work he had with Bill, and namely the need for guns, Dudley came out of his stupor for a second or two before, seemingly, remembering his ruined leg - the man was required to use a cane to move properly - and falling back into his depression.

Harry was pissed enough at this point that he brought up the perfect place to fix his leg, and so the duo haphazardly made their way to Saint Mungo's.

The rest, as they say, is history. Revitalized and free, Dudley quickly signed on for dozens of their missions over the years, joining Bill and Harry to the deepest catacombs and tombs. Dudley had a game, try and kill one of every magical creature in the world. Thus far he had half the dragon population of the world under his belt, a Egyptian Priest, the standard five miles of undead, a Chimera, a Sphinx, and on the list went.

"What's up?" Dudley asked, kneeling next to Harry and Bill, talking as if he were discussing the weather and not fighting a building size lizard.

"We need suppressing fire on that thing's heads, I'm going to make a run for the launcher."

"You WHAT?!" Rashida, who had come out of her catatonic state, and Bill screamed.

"Got it," Dudley said as he set up the bipod for his gun.

"I'm liking you better the more I spend time around you, Curse Breaker!" Gargluck laughed before firing off another flurry of bolts at the many headed Hydra.

"Harry, this is insane!" Bill tried in vain to reason, but if there was one thing he had learned over these last few years: Harry never listened to reason.

Harry grabbed another warhead from the bag before he vaulted over his cover. At the same time, Dudley opened fire, apparently his guns' charm had gone down. Instead of soft pops, the gun roared to life as its tracers hurtled over Harry's head. Harry didn't look to watch the spectacle, more focused on the thin, cylindrical form of the RPG.

Harry ducked, feeling the breath of a head hot on his tail. A roar of pain told him that someone, probably Dudley, scored an eye shot.

Harry slid like a baseball player stealing third, catching the launcher's strap in his hand. Harry used the momentum of his slide to come to his feet, sliding the rocket into the launcher. A twist later and it was ready to fire. Harry twisted, took a knee, and aimed for the chest of the mighty Hydra.

Which was directly in front of him.

Oh fuck.

At ten of the heads darted for him, roaring in unison as Harry pulled the trigger.

For a terrifying millisecond, nothing happened. Silence reigned, not even the light pops or the deafening bang of Dudley's gun came to Harry's ears.

Then, a hard kick sent the rocket flying. It twisted wildly through the air, followed by a trail of grey smoke. With a blinding explosion, the Hyrda's chest split wide, pieces flying in every direction. The heads all reeled, shouting in pain as their blood poured out from the gaping wound in its chest. The beast stumbled before collapsing to the ground with a resounding crash.

The surviving guns fell silent, everyone panting as they stared at the crumpled body of the once mighty Hydra. Harry tossed his launcher to the ground and fell back on his arse, staring at one of the heads that had fallen no more than two meters away.

Only one noise cut through their exhaustion and relief, the insane cackling of Gargluck the goblin.

"This had been the best investment of my life!"

---

The party, finally, reached the tomb itself, guns raised and eyes searching for any traps. They were down to three mercenaries, Dudley not included. Mercer had, unfortunately, died in the battle against the Hydra.

A shame, the man was always willing to work with Harry and Bill for a fair price, knowing what their job would force them to face. That meant they would have to find a new mercenary group to hire for their jobs.

"Eyes open, boys, we aren't out of this yet," Bill warned the company, his nearly empty AK aimed up at the tomb itself. Harry handed the launcher off to another mercenary before raising his rifle as well.

They stopped at the foot of the stairs, rifles still aimed in every which direction. Bill, after a clear moment of hesitation as if he were expecting a trap, took the first step up the stairs.

Nothing happened.

Bill gave a deep sigh of relief before nodding to the rest of the company. They all began up, slowly and carefully in case anyone or anything tried to kill them.

To their surprise, no one did, even as the group reached the tomb. Bill reached into the backpack, which was still being carried by Harry, and pulled free a couple crowbars. He passed one to Dudley before walking over to the tomb.

The duo managed the pry the lip off and, wit a large amount of effort from the two of them, managed to get it off. A cloud of dust kicked up as they dropped the lid, earning a few coughs and sputters from those gathered.

Inside the tomb was the mummified remains of a long dead, and forgotten, Pharaoh. That wasn't what concerned those collected, however as their eyes were dragged to the small, yellow stone. Dudley and Bill tossed aside their crowbars as they stared at the stone in fascination.

It was, for all intents and purposes, a simple small gem. However, there was a certain attractive quality to it that drew all of their eyes.

Dudley was the first to reach for it, one gloved hand moving slowly to grab the simple gem. That was when a ruined hand shot out and grabbed his wrist. Dudley screamed just as the formerly-dead Pharaoh opened his eyes and peeled back his lips over his teeth.

Sadly for the Pharaoh, he had launched his ambush when everyone was the most skittish.

Three AKs, a M1927, Colt, Dudley's fist, and an automatic crossbow tore into the Pharaoh. All of them were screaming, and did not stop firing until they were out of ammunition.

"THAT is a fucking Pharaoh!" Bill shouted, slinging his rifle onto his back. It was shredded by the gunfire, its face now a fine paste from Dudley's vicious punches.

Harry reached a hand in and freed the gem, holding it up and studying its flawless form.

"Bill, what do make of this?" Harry asked handing the gem over to Bill. Bill took it, but as he tried to pull his hand back, Harry's followed.

"Harry, let go," Bill said, raising his eyebrow. Harry rose his eyebrows, pulling back.

"I'm… Trying…" Harry growled, trying to pry his fingers off of the stone with his free hand. Bill did the same, but to no avail, it was like they were glued on.

Dudley moved to help, but was stopped by Harry's raised hand. The stone hard started to glow, quickly growing brighter by the second.

"Stay back!" Harry ordered, still trying to pry his hand free. Bill wrenched a few more times before drawing his wand and aiming it at his own wrist. Harry looked at the other wizard like he was insane, a look that Bill shared.

"Diffindo!" The redhead screamed, clearly terrified at chopping his hand off. The charm bounced off, flying into the ceiling and carving a deep slash into the stone.

"SHIT!" Harry cried, putting a hand up to block his eyes as it grew as bright as the sun. With an explosion, everyone else in the room was thrown into the walls.

When they could all see again, Harry and Bill were gone.

---

Harry and Bill fell to the ground, collapsing with matching groans.

"Ow…" Bill whined, the one that ended up still holding the stone. Harry sat up, shaking his head and looking around at where he had landed.

They were in a forest, a really dense forest. It was cold, reminding Harry of the Forbidden Forest back in Scotland. Really, any forest based in the northern half of the planet felt like this. Harry stood and continued to look around, narrowing his eyes to peer into the dense trees.

"What… What happened?" Bill asked, struggling to sit up. Harry jogged over and grabbed his hand, helping to older man to his feet.

"Seems we got teleported," Harry said, dusting off the other man's back and offering a lopsided grin. Bill looked around, but seemed to find no sign of where they were either.

"Well, hell, now what?" Bill asked, still searching their immediate area for any clues. Harry pulled the, now slightly torn, backpack around to his front and freed a couple brooms from inside. They were an older model of the Cleansweep, slow but they were far more reliable, and easier to control, than the Firebolt and Nimbus line.

"That works," Bill agreed, accepting the other broom. Before they could even mount up, however, a ringing bang sounded off nearby, joined in short order by the dirt next to Bill's foot exploding.

Both twisted, sidearms and wands raised at the tree line. Their brooms hit the ground with a clatter, not that either cared.

A figure stepped from the trees, dressed in a deep green suit that covered their face. In their hands was a long rifle of sorts, which was dropped to the ground as well. The figure raised his hands and grabbed his helmet, twisting it. There was a hiss before it came off. It revealed-

"Sirius?" Harry said breathlessly, lowering his arms. Staring back at them was Sirius Black, not more than a year older than last Harry had seen him, all those years ago.

"Harry?" Sirius gasped, dropping his helmet. In a moment, the duo collided, breaking down and embracing like long-lost family, which in a way they were.

"Merlin, Sirius, I thought you were dead!" Harry cried, falling to his knees and bringing the older man down with him. Sirius was laughing through his tears.

"I thought I would never see you again when I fell through- Wait," Sirius grabbed Harry's shoulders and pushed him back, allowing him to stare into the younger man's eyes.

"Did you follow me through?!" Sirius demanded, terror clear in his voice. Harry raised an eyebrow, which was joined by a small smirk

"I've aged a decade, Sirius, or did you fail to notice that?"

Sirius seemed to properly take Harry in now.

"No… No, you look good. Better than good, like you've actually eaten like a human," Sirius sounded genuinely proud and impressed.

"Watch it," Harry joked, earning a laugh from the other man.

"Wait," Sirius said, suddenly serious again, "Did you say 'decade'?"

"Yeah, why?" Harry asked genuinely confused.

"Harry, I've only been here the better part of two months," Sirius said, his voice grave and displaying a panicked realisation. Harry's eyes widened.

"Shit," He swore, rising and helping his godfather to his feet.

"What." Bill murmured, causing Harry to turn and face his partner in Curse Breaking.

Bill was white as snow, all the color draining from his face and his eyes widening drastically, "What did you just say?"

"I've been here a month…?" Sirius repeated, clearly confused as he looked at Harry. Harry's own dawning horror caught him off guard.

"Oh no." Harry said, about to move for his friend. Bill fell to his knees, looking at the stone in his hand.

"No…" The man murmured, "Fleur, Victoire… No…" He choked back a sob, dipping his head further and shaking.

"Who-" Sirius started, but was stopped by Harry rushing to Bill's side. The bespectacled man helped his friend to his feet, even as Bill was wracked by silent sobs.

"Sirius, you have a place?!" Harry demanded, knocking the older man from his stupor.

"Yeah, here, let me help…"

---

Bill was put… influenced to sleep, now fitful rolling on Sirius's bed. Harry took a seat next to Sirius outside the man's shack, pulling free a bottle of Ogden's finest and a couple tumblers from his backpack.

"Ogden's? Merlin, I've missed this…" Sirius said, studying the bottle with a smile. The 1799 printed on the label especially interested him. Harry mirrored the old Marauder's smile, taking the bottle back and poured out a few drinks for the two of them. He set the bottle aside and sipped his drink, enjoying the cool liquor sliding down his throat

"Nice place you got here, Sirius," Harry commented, indicating towards the house with his drink. Sirius snorted into his drink.

"Bit of a temporary set-up until I learn the local language," Sirius defended.

"You can't even speak the local language?" Harry asked, incredulous.

"Nope, can't get far, either, Portkey isn't working." Sirius held up a rusty tin can next to his seat, a portkey - unless Sirius had suddenly taken to holding up random pieces of trash for fun -.

"Damn, so how have you been getting by?"

"I bring in animals I hunt around these parts and they pay me. No idea if I'm being ripped off, but at least I can figure out which bits of currency are which. Sirius flicked over a small, golden chip. Harry caught it before turning the item over a few times in his hand.

"Huh," Harry, the master of eloquence and verbose observations, passed in back.

"Enough about the last two months, though, how did everything else go after I…"

"Died?" Harry asked with an amused smile before a frown returned to his face, "The war ended 'bout two years after you died. A lot of people, good people, died between then and there, though. Amelia Bones-"

"Wait, Bones died? That woman was a juggernaut back in my day, how?"

"Voldemort," Harry sighed before pressing on, "Anyways, we lost a lot of people that year. The big one was Dumbledore-"

"Dumbledore died?" Sirius sounded beyond surprised at this point, more along the lines of numb.

"Before I tell you, I want you to wait until I finish, okay?"

"It was Snivellus, wasn't it?"

"How-"

"MERLIN DAMN IT, I TOLD DUMBLEDORE!" Sirius raged, carefully setting his drink down before rising and stomping around.

"Sirius, let me finish!"

"Did he at least die?" Sirius demanded of Harry. Harry sighed and threw his head back.

"Yes, can I continue?"

"Fine," Sirius said, looking as if some victory was achieved.

"Okay, that summer I spent time with the Dursleys before heading to the Burrow for Bill and…" Harry faltered, "Fleur's wedding."

"Fleur? Wasn't that the French witch from the Triwizard tournament?" Sirius asked absently, stirring his drink around.

"Aye, they got married 'round a year before the war's end… Oh, Moony got with Tonks!" Harry seemed to remember with a teary smile. Sirius caught this and frowned.

"What happened?"

"They had a beautiful boy, Teddy we call him." Harry reminisced, a single tear making its way down his face.

"Harry."

"Of course, Andromeda blames me for their… Deaths."

"Moony? No." Sirius shook his head, in denial.

"I don't know how, I… Merlin, I wasn't there for them…" Harry dropped his head, forced to relive his deepest regrets once more, after years of repressing them, "I failed so many. Fred, Creevy, so many…"

"Harry, look at me," Sirius ordered. Harry looked bearily at the older man, feeling about an inch tall, now.

"You killed the bastard, did you not?"

"Yes, but-"

"You won the war, did you not?"

"Sirius-"

"Then they are avenged, and you have to move on." Harry sighed before nodding his head.

"I tried, Sirius, but your mistakes… They leave a scar that will never heal…"

"Preaching to the choir," Sirius snarked as he sipped his drink, looking off into the darkness. Neither spoke, deep in thought over their past mistakes over the years.

"... So, what happened to Snape… And on that, Pettigrew?"

"Snape was a double agent, turns out Dumbledore was about to die anyway. He had to 'kill' Dumbledore to cement his loyalty to Voldemort and manipulate things from behind the scenes. It was his actions that gave me the means to destroy Voldemort."

"Bullshit, the Snivellus I knew would never be a good guy!"

"Apparently he had a large amount of regret over inadvertently killing my mum. I'm not saying he was a good person," Harry stopped Sirius before the older man could say a word, "Just that he was on the good side." Sirius looked as if he wanted to retort, thought better of it, and then scowled.

"Fine. Let's stop talking about Snivellus, it makes me sick, what about Pettigrew?"

"Choked to death by the metal hand Voldemort gave him when he hesitated in killing me?"

"He hesitated?" Sirius asked, his voice unreadable as the emotion in his eyes.

"More cowardice than anything, Sirius," Harry growled into his drink, blaming Wormtail as much as he did Voldemort and Snape for the death of his parents. They fell into an awkward silence, instead returning to their drinks.

"So…" Sirius said after a few minutes, "Did you ever find a girl?"

"Remember Ginny?" Harry asked with a smirk, that smirk growing to a grin as a fire came to life in Sirius's eyes.

"No!" The man laughed, slapping his knee.

"Correct, cut it off a few months after the war. Aside from Quidditch, we had little in common. She wanted to settle down, and I… Well, I wanted to live."

"How did that go over?" Sirius asked, amusement poorly hidden on his face.

"Surprisingly well, all things considered. At first she was a little put out, but accepted my reasoning. My guess is she held a silent hope that I would come back, but eventually she got over it and got back with Dean Thomas."

"Huh… Reminds me, what were you and William doing before you… Arrived here?"

"Curse Breaking in Sudan!" Harry announced proudly, rather liking his chosen profession. Sirius looked impressed as he took another sip from his drink.

"Curse Breaker? I'll be damned, how did that happen?"

Harry laughed to himself for a second before recounting the story.

"So, around this time I had a tendency to get pissed a lot. Less because I needed to and more because it was fun, the wonders of magic," Harry said, shaking his drink at Sirius.

"Cheers to that!" Sirius agreed, raising his drink. Both downed the rest of their respective glasses before Harry continued.

"Anyways, one day I really pissed, some Irish prick challenged me, and as the good Englishman I am, I kicked his ass. At some point, Bill wanders in, about to head out on a job. He and I start drinking and talking, he's a little mad at me for breaking things off with Ginny, yeah? Eventually, though, we got on the topic of jobs, and how restless I was. Eventually, we decided to 'go on an adventure'," Harry sipped his drink, "We were lost in an Egyptian Crypt for two weeks before the two of us escaped it."

Sirius broke into a rather healthy amount of laughter, allowing Harry to properly realize just how well his godfather was looking.

The man was less clear shaven, with a large beard and matching moustache, but he was also less pale. Time in this forest had been nice to him, though it raised a question…

"Sirius, how did you build this place? You didn't have a wand when you fell through." Harry asked incredulously, the building was rather slipshod.

"By hand. It was a pain in the arse, among a laundry list of other areas, but it works," Sirius sighed, sliding down into his seat, "What I would do for a wand."

Harry smiled and, from his pocket, withdrew said wand. Harry had kept Sirius's old wand as his third, something a good Curse Breaker always kept. It was mostly to keep Sirius's memory alive, but with the man here in the flesh.

Sirius cheered and brought the wand to his lips, earning an amused snort from Harry.

"Oi, you try living without magic for two months!" Sirius said, flicking his wand experimentally and transfiguring a shovel into a large chicken before changing it back.

"Ten years." Harry deadpanned, though his amusement was betrayed by a slight twitch from his lips.

"That was before you got a true and proper taste," Sirius waved his hand dismissively. Both shared another laugh, it was simply too difficult to not feel joy at seeing one another once again. Harry had little to connect him to his old world, save a distant relationship with his friends and a relative closeness with Fleur and Victoire.

"So, what happens now?" Sirius asked, a more, dare it be said, serious tone replacing the earlier joy. Harry sighed, leaning back in his seat and staring off into space.

"That's the question, no?"

---

A/N:

Thank you for reading this first chapter!

I know to those of you that enjoyed my former HP/SW FanFic, this may seem like a doomed-for-the-start story, but I can ensure you…

Well, time will tell.

~ ErrorPleaseReload