Quinn Fabray from Glee is the saddest Character to have ever been on TV, she's complex and special and she needed her own development because let's face it, the writers butchered her. So here it is. (My version of it.)
There are a few changes, I totally ignored the 'Skank' stage Quinn went through, I'm sorry for all of those who liked that part of her. There was never Finchel. So if it's out of order I apologize, if I missed any details. Things like that. Keep in mind that this will be AU.
Enjoy.
When Lucy Quinn Fabray was born it was like watching stars connect to form a new constellation, everything about her was soft explosions and brightly lit darkness. Her hair was dark, so unlike her parents, but her hazel eyes were bright, unwavering and focused, though it was clear they were seemingly lost in wonder.
She exceeded expectations because she never met them.
Frannie giggled at the treasure in her mother's arms, happy to see her sister differently unique.
Russell frowned when his daughter didn't bare the blonde, blue eyed, Fabray Perfection. He swore silently that he would fix her.
Judy cried at the beautiful imperfection nestled against her chest.
Lucy lost herself in books; her mind raced and inside her eyes words were imprinted in black and white. Adventures, Magic and Romance ran free, in the confines of blanket forts and dim flashlights.
From an early age she knew she was different, where her family was flawless, she was mediocre. Her sister was perfection, with ease she succeeded in her violin recitals and winning over everyone and anyone she met. Lucy was withdrawn, a timid speaker and a vast thinker.
Russell Fabray did not take kindly to his youngest daughter burying herself in fiction, getting excited over characters that didn't exist and pointless imagination filled thoughts. So he forbid her from going to the library without him, took away every book she owned and burned it in the fireplace while he preached about God and disappointment. Lucy never understood how those two things fit in the same sentence.
Eating was her refuge; it was her constant and her escape. She ate till she was full, and then ate some more. She knew it tainted her families' portraits and muddled her families' image even further. By the time she reached third grade the kids became crueler, and Lucy Caboosey was born. She ran home that day, being eight years old and incredibly smart had its advantages, she knew exactly how many pills it would take to make her heart stop beating. Instead of gifting her father with her weakness and self loathing she walked to the fire place and cleaned the ashes of her precious literature.
A pretty girl with dark hair and equally dark eyes sat next to her the next day in school, she offers Lucy a hand and an open smile. "My name's Rachel Berry, nice to meet you!"
Lucy blushes a deep red, "I'm Lucy, and it's nice to meet you too. But, I don't think you should sit next to me, the other kids will begin to make fun of you too."
Rachel looked confused, doe eyes glazed over incredulously, "Why would they make fun of you? No one made fun of Harry Potter when his closest friend was an Owl. I secretly love Hedwig. I asked my daddies for him last Christmas, I never got him though."
Lucy laughed and smiled widely, practically crying over her new friend, "It's cool, I never got my letter from Hogwarts."
And on that day it seemed that heavy ships could float, and kids never grew up.
When she finally made it to the summer before ninth grade her mother drank in sorrow and her father left bruises on her pale skin. The kids never bothered to get to know her, only made fun of her weight and broke her down. Rachel remained, she stood tall despite her small stature and she kept Lucy afloat. The summer Rachel went to Musical preparation camp, she sank.
"You're nothing but a disappointment Lucy." Russell growled as his hands wrapped around the leather belt, his blue eyes trained on her form with malice.
Is it because I'm different? Lucy wanted to scream; instead she kept quiet and took the hits as the salty tears were pooling on the ground. She desperately needed his approval; she craved the smiles that only her sister seemed to receive. So with a submissive nod, she let him lead her.
She wore herself out every day, running ten miles in the morning, going to gymnastics for another four hours and her nights ended with short sprints around the neighborhood. Her weight was diminishing, her legs grew longer and her arms stronger. She excelled in gymnastics and her coach introduced her to Sue Sylvester, and with a scoff and an insult she was taken under her wing. She was stunning, a force to be reckoned with and the whispers around her died down, the stares becoming more frequent. And Lucy felt her insides becoming chipped away; the shallow shell that covered her was impenetrable.
When she bleached her hair blonde, had nose surgery and stopped eating, and when her body became something worth drooling over. Then her fingers picked up Pom Poms instead of books and her father wrapped her in his arms. He whispered proudly against her head, "Now you're a Fabray… Quinn." Lucy was gone, and the shell was named Quinn.
The day she walked into McKinley High people gawked, boys stumbled over themselves and everyone begged for her attention. She took over the Cheerios with discipline, glares and perfect execution; she was the first freshman to become Head Cheerleader. An angry Latina named Santana became her wingman and she was soon followed by a tall ditzy blonde named Brittany, the Unholy Trinity was formed.
She dictated everyone around her, her word was law and her actions were held in high regard. Then she spotted Rachel Berry, standing there with a frown on her unconventionally gorgeous face and Quinn felt something stir in her chest. Rachel looked out of place with her argyle carousel sweater and Quinn knew that the only reason she'd wear something that hideous is because her grandmother had given her plenty of sweaters before she passed away a few months ago. She felt Lucy emerge from the shackles that kept her back and Quinn shook with anger, she would not let this happen, she couldn't. Not when she was finally perfect. Grabbing the slushy from Santana's hand, she sauntered over to Rachel, dousing her in blue ice. The first ever slushy torture thrown by her manicured hands.
"Hey RuPaul! Keep those ugly sweaters out of here. Loser." Quinn gave her a sadistic grin and bit the inside of her lip painfully; doe eyes recognized hazel ones and Quinn panicked. But Rachel kept quiet and ran to the bathroom, everyone laughed while galaxies collapsed in Quinn's head.
By her sophomore year she is considered to be a deity, her rule expanding throughout every clique and staff member. Teachers fear her because they all know she can end their careers with a snap of her fingers but they respect her behind closed doors, knowing her intelligence surpasses anyone else's they've seen and she can become something more than just another Lima Loser. She has a chance.
Finn Hudson the Star Quarterback asks her to be his girlfriend through a poorly written text message, her father smiles when she says yes and her mother just looks away with disappointment.
Sue Sylvester asks Quinn, Santana and Brittany to join 'Glee Club' so that they could sabotage Will Schuesters chance of winning. Quinn sees Rachel, her tiny form hunched over a piano, she's belting out lyrics from the song 'You could be happy' by Snow Patrol and her figure is quivering. Dainty hands move across the piano, sliding over the tears without slipping, Quinn covers her mouth to keep from sobbing when she realizes that Rachel's probably used to it.
She gives people only what they think they want to hear, so she agrees to go to Pucks party. She's coaxed into drinking a generous amount of liquor and it burns in her throat, settling between her ribs, along the cracks. She's warm and carefree, in reality it's more of her being completely fucked up but she doesn't care. She stops caring, even when Puck coerces her into his bedroom and uses her insecurities to shed her clothing.
Quinn stares at the two lines, her palms sweating, her breaths moist against hot lips and she wishes she could curl into herself. Her father kicks her out, her mother sobs watery cries that sound like whiskey being poured into a bottomless glass and everything is crumbled around her. No one really wanted Lucy anyway, Quinn was always sought out for, but the name Fabray was inked into her skin with sharp lines and long curves. She swears she'll love her baby; she wants a good life for her child, even if that means spinning webs to capture lies. And she does lie, to Puck and Finn. When Rachel tells the truth, Quinn can't seem to hate her.
When Beth is born, Quinn thinks of Constellations and Suns, she kisses Beth gently on the forehead and whispers terms of endearment. She'll be happy with Shelby and she'll grow knowing that her heart is cherished by a woman who wanted her to live a far better life than she did. Quinn cries harder in that hospital bed than she did when her father beat her and her classmates bullied her. Someone whispers into her ear the second night she's there, "Everything will get better, even if the world seems like its ending in eruptions and silent yells." Quinn wishes she could dream with eyes open.
Another year passes, Junior year and she feels like crooked glass, fragile with all the edges sticking out. A boy named Sam enters her life and she becomes the Head cheerleader once more. Beth is with someone who can take care of her, Rachel's mother to be exact and she has a new boyfriend who likes her even if she is a cruel, insensitive, cold bitch to him.
Her mother leaves her father and she's allowed back home where it reeks of sorrow and alcohol. But she buries her head in her mother's hug and she just can't stop shaking.
Because she is trying and it isn't supposed to be this empty and hard.
Quinn enters her Senior year, all baby weight gone and her hair cut short, the ends of blonde tips neat and jagged, just like her. She looks like Grace Kelly and people around her start noticing her part in the constellations again. She has nothing to lose because what did she ever have truly gained? Her hand grips the cold metal door on the school entrance, and it's frightening how much she wants this year to be different. A small hand brushes her shoulder; Rachel Berry gives her an encouraging smile and opens the door for her. And she just knows that things will fall into place, even if they start to tumble down again. Quinn never thought fresh starts would feel like printed pages and smell like new books.
Not sure if this will be a multi-chap…. But I am adding Rachel's own chapter for certain.