Summary: After Anakin's Death (lava pit theory), Padmé finds comfort in
Obi-Wan and he finds the same in her.
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A silhouetted figure loomed in the balcony of the large apartment overlooking the peaceful evening sky of Naboo. Padmé placed both her delicate hands on the railing and leaned forward a bit, her dark eyes looking towards the heavens. She spoke softly, her voice almost a whisper, "The sky is beautiful. How I wish you were next to me now, so you could see it." She spoke to her fallen husband. It had been weeks since she had learned of his passing through Obi-Wan. He had been so forlorn when he had delivered the message. Anakin had died by his hand. They had fought on Tatooine after Anakin had gone on a rampage and slaughtered the Hutts and many other creatures that he faulted for the pain inside of him. "Padmé," she heard a gentle voice call from behind her. She turned now to see the piercing blue eyes and handsome face of Master Obi-Wan Kenobi. She could not help the smile that played now upon her lips. "Master Kenobi," she replied, with a gentle tone to match his. "Come join me." He stepped now to her side, with a few easy strides. He laid a large hand on the railing and glanced towards the sky before turning to look into her eyes. He seemed lost a moment as she stared back at him. Then he managed to stammer," Why are you out here so late, m'lady? It is cold." "I enjoy the night air," she whispered and now her eyes moved out to the scenery again. The moonlit lake gave off an eerie glow as it moved with the wind. A sad smile was now displayed as she let her eyes wander back to the Jedi Master's. He lifted a large hand to her cheek and touched her more gently than she could remember anyone ever doing before. This man had been her comfort in her greatest times of grief. And his very presence was her solace, her relief. And now, as he let his hand linger there, she felt passion for him that she knew had always loomed within her, but had never managed to surface until recently.
Obi-Wan felt drawn to her, letting his hand rest there upon her pale, moonlit face. He let his eyes stare deep into hers and he could not form any words. She was beautiful, and even more radiant under this light. He let his hand trail down her cheek and fall to his side easily. An uneasy look overtook his features. "You are feeling alright, aren't you m'lady?"
He spoke with such concern for her that she had to smile brightly and resist the urge to wrap her arms around him. "I'm fine," she said softly, her lips red and contrasting beautifully with the pale, illuminated face.
He found himself staring at her mouth a few more seconds than he should have, then finally letting his eyes meet again with hers. He had come here to check on her and he had. So why could he not move to go? It seemed so easy as he had played it over again in his mind, yet it did not come to pass. So much had happened over the last few weeks. He'd seen his apprentice fall and perish in a smoldering pit, and by his very own hands. The events had taken their toll on him. And through it all, Padmé had been his one source of reason, of comfort. He found it hard to leave her side and so he could not bring himself to do it now, for she seemed so in need of him. She seemed to be getting physically weaker as well, as if the strain on her emotions had wreaked havoc on her frail body. He worried for her constantly. And there was no doubt in his mind now that he cared for her, very deeply, much more deeply than he could admit to himself. "Perhaps, I should go and leave you to rest. It is late. I only wished to see that you were alright."
She placed her hand on his as it still gripped the railing. "Stay," she whispered, still gazing into his electric blue eyes. "I need your company."
A jolt had passed through him as her hand rested on his and he had glanced at the delicate fingers sprawled over his large digits, then he had darted his eyes quickly back to her. Though his face was calm, he was reeling inside. This moment made him feel odd and out of control somehow. "I'll stay then, for as long as you need me." He heard himself speak the words gently, soothingly, but in his head it felt wrong to say such a thing. He felt as if he'd betrayed someone in doing so.
She wanted him with all her being. She never wanted him to leave her side. She'd lost Anakin a long time ago. Anakin was choosing power over her. She would have lost him anyway, though she still harbored love for him. And the deep wound his passing had left in her, would never heal. And now she found great comfort in Obi-Wan and she no longer let herself hide the feelings she'd had for so long. "Don't go back to Coruscant," she said softly, never letting her eyes waver from his. He had started to say something but she went on," I know that eventually, you will want to go. But I need you here. I need you with me."
Obi-Wan was definitely taken aback by her sudden declarations. He felt something deep inside of him burst with warmth and excitement, yet his face and his blue eyes remained as they had been, watching her calmly, steadily. "I am in no hurry to leave you m'lady, believe me. I would stay with you always, but the Council has final say in what I do. I must obey them, on my honor and by the oath I've sworn."
Padmé frowned, making her features seem a little darker under the moonlight. Her once brilliant eyes were dark and sad these days and they looked forlorn now, desperate. She rarely let her true feelings come to the surface, but she chose to hide nothing from the man before her. "Would you? Stay with me always, if you could?"
Her voice was so soft, so soothing and she spoke with such honesty that Obi- Wan's heart sank. He knew now, if he had not before, that he was hopelessly in love with this woman and it would tear him up inside to ever leave her alone. He placed his hand on her cheek again and she leaned into it slightly with her head. He watched her now with such devotion in his eyes; for once his own feelings came bubbling to the surface. But was this her grief? Was she merely reaching out to the first man she could? "You cannot mean what you say." He spoke gently to her, disbelieving of this tender moment between them.
"I mean it, my dear Jedi." She turned her face into his palm and placed a delicate kiss there, then turned her face back to him. He had not pulled his hand away, he had watched in amazement, letting his blue orbs finally rest on her face, her eyes. "Don't leave me, please. Stay with me.. for always." She let the last two words escape her in a whisper, with a small sigh to follow and her eyes continued to stare into his, waiting for the slightest hint from him.
He leaned in his head towards hers slowly, giving her time to turn away, and he let his lips find hers as he slipped his eyes shut and kissed her gently. The excitement and anticipation made him feel as if this were not real, as if any moment he would wake up on Coruscant within the walls of his room in the Temple.
Padmé was surprised, but drawn helplessly into the kiss and the embrace that followed as he slipped both his hands around her slender waist. She wrapped her arms around his neck and slipped her eyes shut, as he gently deepened the kiss, slipping his tongue into her mouth and stroking her own tongue lightly. She felt the electricity of the moment course through her. It was real and it was finally happening. She played with his tongue a little, using her own to gently nudge his and massage it softly, sensually.
Suddenly, thinking to himself that this was the worst possible thing he could have done at the worst possible moment, he placed both hands on either side of her, on her thin shoulders, and pushed her gently away from him. He opened his eyes and watched her as she opened hers reluctantly. The frown on her face, the look of despair in her dark eyes, made his heart break. "We can't do this Padmé," he whispered to her.
She took a step back, slipping out of his grasp, his arms dropping easily to his sides. She averted her eyes towards the heavens again, wanting to look at anything but him right now. "I understand," she whispered back. Perhaps, he didn't feel for her what she felt for him. "I hope you don't take this moment to define me as a lonely, pathetic widow." She grinned at the remark, though it was a bitter smile and did not suit her. She turned her face back towards him, seeing the frown on his lips, framed by the thick facial hair.
"Don't say such things," he answered, a forlorn tone in his tender voice. "It is simply not the right time.."
"When is the right time," she cut him off, her voice never rising from a soft, even tone. "You just feel nothing for me. The moments we have shared where you have been my only light, my beacon of hope, have obviously meant more to me than they ever could to you."
Her words stung him and he looked down. This brave Jedi Knight who had fought many formidable enemies, now felt reduced to the size of a small creature by the words of this petite woman. But she was strong wasn't she? Stronger than anyone he had ever known. That was what drew him to her. After Qui-Gon's funeral ceremony, they had begun their friendship. They had spoken at length about so many things. She had been a comfort to him then. And he could not repay the favor now. "I should go. I don't want to bring you any more pain, m'lady."
Her demeanor softened when she spoke," if you go, pain is all I will be left with." She looked up at him now, her dark eyes glittering with tears that were forming. And he moved closer to her now, filling the space between them easily with one large stride. He lifted his hand to her face and wiped the tears away so gently with his large, clumsy digits that she could not help but smile. "Stay with me tonight."
The words did not seem to shock him, though by all accounts, coming from Padmé, they should have been quite shocking. But he gave her a sweet smile. A smile she had seen many times in the past grace his lips. It was a smile she saw only in their private moments, when they would talk for hours while no one else was around. It was her smile and it let her know now how much he really cared. He leaned in again and pressed his lips to hers, then slowly straightened. "I cannot seem to deny you anything," he answered her with the smile still on his lips. It was a reply with his usual hint of wit.
She gave a soft semblance of a laugh and looked up at him, her cheeks flushed and her smile brighter than it had been all night. "You know how I feel then."
"I love you," he said plainly to her, his face looking serious a moment, but his blue eyes tender. "I expect I always have, and always will. You've always known that."
"Have I," she asked, raising an elegant brow, a playful grin on her red lips.
He moved his hands again to her waist, pulling her closer to him so that her body was pressed against his and they could feel the heat from one another as if it were there very own. Their faces were inches away as he leaned in and whispered. "I'll stay with you, always. I would never leave you. I cannot hope to leave you."
"I'd be lost without you," she whispered back. Their eyes were hopelessly locked upon one another and an intense heat of passion passed between them. Obi-Wan put his forehead slowly to hers, their eyes still locked on each other. He closed his eyes and let out a soft sigh.
"I love you," he repeated in a whisper barely audible. It seemed he repeated it more for himself. The revelation had finally been made and lifted a great weight from his shoulders. A weight he had ignored and felt he would always have to ignore.
Padmé smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck, caressing his back with her hands tenderly. "My dear Obi-Wan, how I have always loved you," she whispered back, letting a sigh escape her. Her eyes relayed all of that and more as he opened his to look into them again. And she saw reflected back at her the same loving devotion she gave to him.
~*~*~*~To be continued~*~*~*~
~*~*~*~
A silhouetted figure loomed in the balcony of the large apartment overlooking the peaceful evening sky of Naboo. Padmé placed both her delicate hands on the railing and leaned forward a bit, her dark eyes looking towards the heavens. She spoke softly, her voice almost a whisper, "The sky is beautiful. How I wish you were next to me now, so you could see it." She spoke to her fallen husband. It had been weeks since she had learned of his passing through Obi-Wan. He had been so forlorn when he had delivered the message. Anakin had died by his hand. They had fought on Tatooine after Anakin had gone on a rampage and slaughtered the Hutts and many other creatures that he faulted for the pain inside of him. "Padmé," she heard a gentle voice call from behind her. She turned now to see the piercing blue eyes and handsome face of Master Obi-Wan Kenobi. She could not help the smile that played now upon her lips. "Master Kenobi," she replied, with a gentle tone to match his. "Come join me." He stepped now to her side, with a few easy strides. He laid a large hand on the railing and glanced towards the sky before turning to look into her eyes. He seemed lost a moment as she stared back at him. Then he managed to stammer," Why are you out here so late, m'lady? It is cold." "I enjoy the night air," she whispered and now her eyes moved out to the scenery again. The moonlit lake gave off an eerie glow as it moved with the wind. A sad smile was now displayed as she let her eyes wander back to the Jedi Master's. He lifted a large hand to her cheek and touched her more gently than she could remember anyone ever doing before. This man had been her comfort in her greatest times of grief. And his very presence was her solace, her relief. And now, as he let his hand linger there, she felt passion for him that she knew had always loomed within her, but had never managed to surface until recently.
Obi-Wan felt drawn to her, letting his hand rest there upon her pale, moonlit face. He let his eyes stare deep into hers and he could not form any words. She was beautiful, and even more radiant under this light. He let his hand trail down her cheek and fall to his side easily. An uneasy look overtook his features. "You are feeling alright, aren't you m'lady?"
He spoke with such concern for her that she had to smile brightly and resist the urge to wrap her arms around him. "I'm fine," she said softly, her lips red and contrasting beautifully with the pale, illuminated face.
He found himself staring at her mouth a few more seconds than he should have, then finally letting his eyes meet again with hers. He had come here to check on her and he had. So why could he not move to go? It seemed so easy as he had played it over again in his mind, yet it did not come to pass. So much had happened over the last few weeks. He'd seen his apprentice fall and perish in a smoldering pit, and by his very own hands. The events had taken their toll on him. And through it all, Padmé had been his one source of reason, of comfort. He found it hard to leave her side and so he could not bring himself to do it now, for she seemed so in need of him. She seemed to be getting physically weaker as well, as if the strain on her emotions had wreaked havoc on her frail body. He worried for her constantly. And there was no doubt in his mind now that he cared for her, very deeply, much more deeply than he could admit to himself. "Perhaps, I should go and leave you to rest. It is late. I only wished to see that you were alright."
She placed her hand on his as it still gripped the railing. "Stay," she whispered, still gazing into his electric blue eyes. "I need your company."
A jolt had passed through him as her hand rested on his and he had glanced at the delicate fingers sprawled over his large digits, then he had darted his eyes quickly back to her. Though his face was calm, he was reeling inside. This moment made him feel odd and out of control somehow. "I'll stay then, for as long as you need me." He heard himself speak the words gently, soothingly, but in his head it felt wrong to say such a thing. He felt as if he'd betrayed someone in doing so.
She wanted him with all her being. She never wanted him to leave her side. She'd lost Anakin a long time ago. Anakin was choosing power over her. She would have lost him anyway, though she still harbored love for him. And the deep wound his passing had left in her, would never heal. And now she found great comfort in Obi-Wan and she no longer let herself hide the feelings she'd had for so long. "Don't go back to Coruscant," she said softly, never letting her eyes waver from his. He had started to say something but she went on," I know that eventually, you will want to go. But I need you here. I need you with me."
Obi-Wan was definitely taken aback by her sudden declarations. He felt something deep inside of him burst with warmth and excitement, yet his face and his blue eyes remained as they had been, watching her calmly, steadily. "I am in no hurry to leave you m'lady, believe me. I would stay with you always, but the Council has final say in what I do. I must obey them, on my honor and by the oath I've sworn."
Padmé frowned, making her features seem a little darker under the moonlight. Her once brilliant eyes were dark and sad these days and they looked forlorn now, desperate. She rarely let her true feelings come to the surface, but she chose to hide nothing from the man before her. "Would you? Stay with me always, if you could?"
Her voice was so soft, so soothing and she spoke with such honesty that Obi- Wan's heart sank. He knew now, if he had not before, that he was hopelessly in love with this woman and it would tear him up inside to ever leave her alone. He placed his hand on her cheek again and she leaned into it slightly with her head. He watched her now with such devotion in his eyes; for once his own feelings came bubbling to the surface. But was this her grief? Was she merely reaching out to the first man she could? "You cannot mean what you say." He spoke gently to her, disbelieving of this tender moment between them.
"I mean it, my dear Jedi." She turned her face into his palm and placed a delicate kiss there, then turned her face back to him. He had not pulled his hand away, he had watched in amazement, letting his blue orbs finally rest on her face, her eyes. "Don't leave me, please. Stay with me.. for always." She let the last two words escape her in a whisper, with a small sigh to follow and her eyes continued to stare into his, waiting for the slightest hint from him.
He leaned in his head towards hers slowly, giving her time to turn away, and he let his lips find hers as he slipped his eyes shut and kissed her gently. The excitement and anticipation made him feel as if this were not real, as if any moment he would wake up on Coruscant within the walls of his room in the Temple.
Padmé was surprised, but drawn helplessly into the kiss and the embrace that followed as he slipped both his hands around her slender waist. She wrapped her arms around his neck and slipped her eyes shut, as he gently deepened the kiss, slipping his tongue into her mouth and stroking her own tongue lightly. She felt the electricity of the moment course through her. It was real and it was finally happening. She played with his tongue a little, using her own to gently nudge his and massage it softly, sensually.
Suddenly, thinking to himself that this was the worst possible thing he could have done at the worst possible moment, he placed both hands on either side of her, on her thin shoulders, and pushed her gently away from him. He opened his eyes and watched her as she opened hers reluctantly. The frown on her face, the look of despair in her dark eyes, made his heart break. "We can't do this Padmé," he whispered to her.
She took a step back, slipping out of his grasp, his arms dropping easily to his sides. She averted her eyes towards the heavens again, wanting to look at anything but him right now. "I understand," she whispered back. Perhaps, he didn't feel for her what she felt for him. "I hope you don't take this moment to define me as a lonely, pathetic widow." She grinned at the remark, though it was a bitter smile and did not suit her. She turned her face back towards him, seeing the frown on his lips, framed by the thick facial hair.
"Don't say such things," he answered, a forlorn tone in his tender voice. "It is simply not the right time.."
"When is the right time," she cut him off, her voice never rising from a soft, even tone. "You just feel nothing for me. The moments we have shared where you have been my only light, my beacon of hope, have obviously meant more to me than they ever could to you."
Her words stung him and he looked down. This brave Jedi Knight who had fought many formidable enemies, now felt reduced to the size of a small creature by the words of this petite woman. But she was strong wasn't she? Stronger than anyone he had ever known. That was what drew him to her. After Qui-Gon's funeral ceremony, they had begun their friendship. They had spoken at length about so many things. She had been a comfort to him then. And he could not repay the favor now. "I should go. I don't want to bring you any more pain, m'lady."
Her demeanor softened when she spoke," if you go, pain is all I will be left with." She looked up at him now, her dark eyes glittering with tears that were forming. And he moved closer to her now, filling the space between them easily with one large stride. He lifted his hand to her face and wiped the tears away so gently with his large, clumsy digits that she could not help but smile. "Stay with me tonight."
The words did not seem to shock him, though by all accounts, coming from Padmé, they should have been quite shocking. But he gave her a sweet smile. A smile she had seen many times in the past grace his lips. It was a smile she saw only in their private moments, when they would talk for hours while no one else was around. It was her smile and it let her know now how much he really cared. He leaned in again and pressed his lips to hers, then slowly straightened. "I cannot seem to deny you anything," he answered her with the smile still on his lips. It was a reply with his usual hint of wit.
She gave a soft semblance of a laugh and looked up at him, her cheeks flushed and her smile brighter than it had been all night. "You know how I feel then."
"I love you," he said plainly to her, his face looking serious a moment, but his blue eyes tender. "I expect I always have, and always will. You've always known that."
"Have I," she asked, raising an elegant brow, a playful grin on her red lips.
He moved his hands again to her waist, pulling her closer to him so that her body was pressed against his and they could feel the heat from one another as if it were there very own. Their faces were inches away as he leaned in and whispered. "I'll stay with you, always. I would never leave you. I cannot hope to leave you."
"I'd be lost without you," she whispered back. Their eyes were hopelessly locked upon one another and an intense heat of passion passed between them. Obi-Wan put his forehead slowly to hers, their eyes still locked on each other. He closed his eyes and let out a soft sigh.
"I love you," he repeated in a whisper barely audible. It seemed he repeated it more for himself. The revelation had finally been made and lifted a great weight from his shoulders. A weight he had ignored and felt he would always have to ignore.
Padmé smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck, caressing his back with her hands tenderly. "My dear Obi-Wan, how I have always loved you," she whispered back, letting a sigh escape her. Her eyes relayed all of that and more as he opened his to look into them again. And she saw reflected back at her the same loving devotion she gave to him.
~*~*~*~To be continued~*~*~*~